AUTHOR'S NOTE: I did not check this over for any type of errors. So please forgive me. It's been over a month since an update and I just wanted to give you guys something.

"Cheryl?" Tig questions confused as the brunette walked behind Gemma. Talk about a blast from the past. But he can also admit a beautiful one if he can admit to himself. He forgot how much he had liked Cheryl's long model legs. And looking at those toned legs she has retained with age distracts him from the hole in his back.

"Nice to see you too, Tig." She replies as she eyes the scene before her. He thinks she glares at Amelia.

"What brings you here?" He asks her. He finds it odd that Cheryl is here of all places when he knows she has ceased contact with her two children.

"Visiting." She replies simply. Her blue gaze turns to Amelia. "Maybe you should take a shower. Put some clothes on."

"Right, sorry." Amelia mutters as she shuffles out with the sheet wrapped around her.

Tig raises an eyebrow. "You didn't need to be harsh with her."

"I don't pay her to fuck people." Cheryl replies bluntly.

Tig's eyes widen at that, but he keeps his mouth shut. It's not his business really what the gash is doing here.

"I'm going to make sure that Nate is okay." She tells him as she leaves the room.

Tig has just managed to pull up his jeans when Gemma waltzes in.

"Does Cheryl know about Chey and Jax?" He asks her. He knows Cheryl has to know Lip had gotten married and had a kid, but Chey and Jax are a fresh thing.

"She'll find out soon enough."

"Gem…" Tig says pointedly.

"What?"

"Did you at least warn Cheyenne about her mom being here?"

"I'm hoping the bitch will be long gone by then." Gemma tells him.

Tig shakes his head. "Please don't murder her. The last thing we need to be is enemies with the Russians."

…

Gemma watches as Cheryl is able to put her father down for a nap. It seems that Cheryl isn't too happy with the greedy little Gaudi. Hopefully her unhappiness with her work ethic doesn't make Cheryl start snooping. It's not like Gemma will have any problems in tying Cheryl up next to her. Yet, it seems Cheryl is intent on staying until Nate is sent to his home. It's only been a couple hours and Gemma is already over her presences especially since Cheyenne is on her way. She can only imagine all the stones that are going to get unturned by them meeting face to face.

"We need to talk." Gemma tells her quietly.

Cheryl eyes her with barely concealed annoyance, but follows her out to the backyard. To Nate's garden.

"What is it?" Cheryl asks.

"Cheyenne is coming up here to help with Tig." Gemma tells her.

Cheryl is quiet. "You're going to have my child risk getting a federal charge to help you?"

"Your child?" Gemma questions. "You have no right claiming to be a mother to Cheyenne or Lip. I raised both of them when you walked away." Gemma hisses.

"Walked away?" Cheryl repeats insulted. "You had Clay jam a fucking speed ball in my fucking arm. I nearly fucking died!" Gemma winces at that. "Yeah, you forgot about that truth didn't you."

Gemma purses her lips. "It was rough times back then."

Cheryl laughs. She full on laughs. "No, they weren't. You murdered my husband because he knew what John wanted. And you took advantage of my addiction. I was just a fucking pathetic junkie. You took my kids from me." Cheryl spits out. "I have to live with the fact I couldn't save them every day. I missed my own granddaughter's birth. So don't think I abandoned them."

"But you did." Gemma points out. Nothing should have stopped Cheryl from being a mother. And despite the sordid history, Gemma wouldn't have denied Cheryl from seeing her own children.

"It was too late. Lip…the club is in his blood. If I would have told him the truth…if it would have gotten out. The club would have crumbled. He loves Clay like a father. I may hate Clay but I couldn't break my boys heart."

"And Cheyenne?"

"I thought she would have been fine. I didn't think she would be moonlighting as a mob doctor." Cheryl says bitterly.

"Well she's more than that."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"She's Jax's old lady. They have a son. Abel, he's 8 months."

Gemma has to turn away when Cheryl begins to cry.

…

Cheyenne still burns from the spat between her and Jax. She doesn't know why, but she does. She thinks it might be good to get away from Charming and maybe Jax. They both are suffocating each other in their grief – in their pain. She's not sure how they are going to navigate through these murky waters. Besides, stress isn't good for the baby.

And the five hour ride, she hopes gives her some sort of clarity. After all, Gemma doesn't know about Abel. She is going to have to swallow that lie down so Gemma doesn't sniff it out.

It isn't long before she reaches Nate Madock's house. She isn't surprised to see a shitload of flowers surrounding the home. Cheyenne can admit it is a beautiful home and she can also see the similarities the home has with Gemma's home in Charming. They both have flowers surrounding the home, the dark wood, and the slight isolation it has within the neighborhood.

Cheyenne hasn't even turned off her engine when she sees the front door and Gemma comes barreling out.

It breaks her heart that Gemma looks so happy as the matriarch doesn't even know her grandson is missing.

Cheyenne exits the car and finds herself receiving a tight hug from Gemma.

"I missed you so much." Gemma tells her as she presses a kiss to her head.

"I missed you too, Gem." Cheyenne tells her.

Gemma pulls back and pushes back some her hair. "How's Jax and Abel."

Here Cheyenne wishes she could smoke a fucking cigarette to be able to hide her face. She knows how well Gemma can sniff out lies no matter how little they are. "They miss you like everyone else does in Charming."

"Thanks for coming, I just needed a friendly face," Gemma mutters before she finds herself receiving another hug. "Come on."

Cheyenne was given a quick tour of the home her father and mother purchased after Gemma had left Charming.

She has noticed that the house only had a few pictures of Gemma and they were of her as a child. There are no pictures of her as an adult and there certainly weren't any of Jax and Thomas. It is clear that lack of Gemma's presence in the house was due to her tumultuous relationship with her mother, Rose. Cheyenne wonders if that relationship was rocky because the two were so much alike.

Even if Cheyenne never met Gemma's parents, they were the ones that nurtured her along with passing their nature down on through genes. Gemma's overprotective nature came from somewhere.

Cheyenne is in the middle of packing the various photographs when Tig comes into the room with a split lip from where Nate clocked him earlier.

Cheyenne begins to work on removing the slug. It's easy and quick.

"Well, you're gonna be fine. There's no bone or muscle damage."

"Thanks, doc. I'm sorry I pulled you away from your work." Tig says.

"It's okay." She tells him with a smile.

"How's Jax holding up?"

"I don't know. I'm sure he tells you guys more than he does me." She tells him somewhat icily. Tig doesn't comment on it.

However the sound of footsteps entering the room causes her to look up and Cheyenne almost faints from shock.

"Mom?" Cheyenne questions in a shaky voice.

Her mom gives her a timid smile and she looks nervous. "Hello, Cheyenne."

…

Cheyenne wonders if she should be upset that Gemma didn't give her a heads up about her mother. She thinks she might be slightly even then she probably wouldn't have believed her. It's been nearly 15 years since she seen her mother. And the years have been kind to her mother despite the past drug abuse.

And Cheyenne tries to find herself in her mom. She thinks they have the same shape of face, shape of their eyes, and maybe their mouths. It's hard looking at someone, who is such a part of her, but is a stranger.

"You've been in Oregon this whole time?" She asks her mother. They relocated downstairs into what used to be Nate's study where he would write his sermons. It's been awkward as they stare at each other. It seems her mom isn't going to make a move to initiate a conversation. And it only shows how much her mother has changed. She remembers that her mother had no problem hearing the sound of her voice.

"No, I live in Northern California with my husband. I make frequent trips back and forth to check on Nate and Rose when she was alive."

"And you couldn't pick up a phone? Send a postcard?"

"With the pain and wreckage I caused…I thought it was best to stay away." Cheryl replies.

"Well clearly with your judgment you are so not meant to be a mother." Cheyenne lets slip pass her lips.

Her mom winces but doesn't rebuke the statement. "I hear you have a son, Abel. Congratulations, you and Jax must be very happy."

Cheyenne shakes her head. "I don't know what you want me to say. Because I know after this, I won't hear from you again and even if I did…I don't think I have room for you in my life."

"I know that," Cheryl says shakily. "I know there aren't enough apologies in the world to make up for my faults as a mother."

"Dad!" Gemma shouts causing the two to jump. "Dad!" Gemma barks before she rushes into the room. "Have you guys seen my dad?"

…

If Cheyenne thought coming to Oregon would have been a reprieve from Charming's craziness, Cheyenne quickly got rid of that false delusion. She slightly believes trouble follows Gemma like a bad smell. Cheyenne quickly walks back upstairs from the basement and waits until Gemma has closed the door she rounds on her.

"Why in the fuck is she tied in the basement?" Cheyenne asks. "Don't you think one murder under your belt is enough?"

Gemma rolls her eyes, "It's just insurance."

"Insurance for what?"

"She was going to busy writing my mother's memoir and was going to publish it to our favorite ATF agent." Gemma informs her.

"And what happens when you move your dad? You going to keep her down there?"

"I'll give someone an anonymous tip," Gemma says shrugging her shoulders.

"Christ, Gemma, and Tig and my mom let you do this?"

"Well we wouldn't have been in this situation if he wasn't tapping the bitch and making her curious. Besides, your mom thinks she just left."

"Fucking hell," Cheyenne mutters as she runs a hand through her hair.

"I didn't imagine you to be the one to get strung out over a girl being tied up." Gemma remarks.

Cheyenne looks up at Gemma with a clenched jaw. But her stomach starts to turn and she rushes to the bathroom.

…

Jax leans against one of Lin's associates' fancy car and lights a cigarette and tries hard to not really think about the Asians deviant fantasies when it comes to white women. He really tries hard not to think about what is going on behind the thick wooden doors with the women when his old lady is a state away.

Despite the stunted silence sometimes and them only being able to touch each other through sex, he misses her. He missed seeing her smile and her laugh that reminded him of wind chimes. He craved how her body would naturally and instinctively arch into him when he held her in his arms. And he hoped they found Abel soon because what he missed the most was seeing the two of them interact. He missed seeing Abel in Cheyenne's arm.

And he hoped everything goes smoothly now that they were making the money to hook up with Serg's tracker and head to Canada to find his son. He prayed that bastard Cameron was there as he couldn't wait to pound the ever loving shit out of that man nice and slow.

He wanted that before he and the club went away on weapon charges. Jax can't help but think that shit just keeps getting piled on.

His attention however is taken by Clay who exits the building with his Cuban cigar.

"You're missing a sweet Asian buffet inside. All you can eat." Jax jokes as he takes a long drag of his cigarette.

"Ah. With your mom being away, it feels too much like cheating." Clay surmises. "I miss her so goddamn much." He tells him.

"Yeah, me too." Jax agrees. And for the life of him, Jax can't ever really think of a time when his mom was ever gone from his laugh. He can't ever recall his mom leaving for a vacation. Hell, he doesn't even think when she and Clay got married they went anywhere. If they did it was only the cabin. But there has never been a prolong absence the way he remembers his father always being gone.

"Shit, I better go get my dick sucked, I'm starting to sound as whipped as you." Clay says breaking out of his reverie.

"Blow me."

"I love you too, son." Clay tells him as he presses a kiss to his head and heads back inside the building.

Jax discards his cigarette and digs in his pocket for his burner and calls Cheyenne.

Jax can admit he is slightly annoyed that it takes a few rings before she answers.

"Finally." He grounds out.

"Sorry. There's been a lot going on here." She tells him.

"What was the crisis with Nate?"

"Shot Tig and he went missing."

"What?" Jax thinks he really doesn't even want to know.

"Yeah and plus it seems your mom could use the company." She tells him sadly.

"She doing okay?"

"I think with what's going on with your grandfather is weighing her down, but she's your mother. She'll always pull through."

"Look, I'm heading up there tomorrow. Just stay put, okay?"

"I'm sorry I left the way I did." She tells him.

"It's okay. I think it was better for you to be out of here." Jax tells her.

"Well the only thing that matters is if I have something to come home to." She tells him sadly.

Jax feels his throat closing in. "I'll see you tomorrow." Jax tells her as he ends the phone call.

Jax pockets his phone and discards his cigarette as he heads back insides Lin's.

He finds a spot at the bar and watches as the club takes advantage of the pussy buffet along with the Asians. Sometimes he can't believe that he used to be like his fellow brothers and willing to dip his dick into anything. His eyes bounce around to the scantily clad women and his eyes settle upon a familiar blonde that is escorting a pudgy Asian to a back room.

As she looks up and closes the door, she shoots him a bright smile.

Jax takes another sip of his drink.

…

Cheyenne really wishes she could have a drink or at least a fucking cigarette. Instead, she can only settle for an ice pack on her head. She shouldn't have been surprised with the way the day has gone. The club and it's associate have had shitty luck and it leaking onto her shouldn't have been a shock. However, she didn't expect to have to witness another body to drop in front of her.

She fears there will come a day when she will become desensitized to this. She knows the longer she stays in this life more shit will keep happening as Jax told her himself. And she really wonders if she will be able to take it all in stride. To really love and trust someone means to give up a part of yourself to that person and that's what scares her. She believes Jax when he says he wants to change things or they will be worse, but for her to take it in stride, she doesn't know if she can do it. Following Jax's lead is what has gotten them in the situation they were in now.

"It seems like something is troubling you, dear." Cheyenne nearly jumps out of her skin at the sound of Nate's voice. "Sorry didn't mean to frighten you."

"It's fine," Cheyenne says. "Do you need help with something, Nate?"

"Just enjoying the comfort of my own home before it's gone," he tells her sadly.

"It's a beautiful home." Cheyenne tells him.

"Your mother tells me the same thing?" Nate says her as he takes a seat at the kitchen table across from where she stands behind the island.

Cheyenne looks at him in surprise that he remembers something like that.

"I have my good days, ya know."

"I guess I should thank you for at least helping her. It seems being away from Charming has done her some good."

"Yes, it has, but she had to pay a terrible price, didn't she?"

"I wouldn't know. She couldn't even pick up the phone. And now she has a new husband – a new life."

"You believe that your mother doesn't love you?"

"Not in the way it matters because love isn't always enough when it comes to some things. Besides, I'm not the only one to have a tragedy of a junkie mother, so there is no use to dwell on it."

"No, you're allowed to feel the pain and betrayal –"

"I wouldn't exactly call it betrayal," Cheyenne interjects.

Gemma's father gets up from the table with a spark in his eyes as he walks towards her. "Why not? The bond of a mother and child is innate, strong, and sacred. And the child is born needing the nurture – comfort – from it's mother. It's instinctual. And only something really powerful or poisoning can severe that bond. And your mother betrayed you by breaking that bond you instinctually crave. You have the right to be angry as all the other tragedies."

"I'm not going to waste my anger on her."

"Make allowance for each other's faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others." Nate quotes from the bible. Cheyenne knows she should be annoyed the man is quoting the Bible to her, but she doesn't as this is the most lucid she has seen Nate since she arrived. He turns to her with a small smile. "Is that what you're really worried about? That you will have the same faults as your mother?"

Cheyenne looks up at Nate with wide eyes and she is left speechless.

However the conversation takes a turn as she watches as Nate's smile turns into a frown. "Oh, are you a friend of Rosie? A volunteer from the parish?"

A strained smile overtakes her lips. "No, Nate, I'm a friend of Gemma's, I'm here to help her."

"Gemma's here." He says excited. "Oh, Rosie will be so excited."

…

After Nate's episode, Cheyenne quickly helped Gemma put the man to bed and Cheyenne took a shower and now she is downstairs in the living room by herself.

She debates on going to talk to her mother, but she finds she can't.

"Hey."

Cheyenne jumps at the sound of Gemma's voice.

"Shit, I'm sorry."

"It's fine," Cheyenne says with a wave of a hand. "What's up?"

"I wanted to say sorry for not warning you about your mother and I just want to know how you're doing." Gemma asks as she takes a seat in her father's recliner. "You know after what happened with the caretaker."

"It's like you said – her plan." Cheyenne tells her. "What happened, happened, can't really change anything."

"So I take it that's not what is weighing heavy on your conscious?" Gemma guesses.

"How much did you hear in the kitchen?" Cheyenne counters.

"I can't tell you want to do, but she's here and you may never get the chance again to talk to her. Tell her how you feel." Gemma says.

"15 years of silence…I don't think I can forgive that. I try not to dwell on it."

"Well maybe it's time to confront it. Make peace." Gemma suggests.

"Is that what you're doing here? Making peace with your father and mother?"

Gemma purses her lips. "I don't want your mother to make you doubt how good of a mother you are to Abel."

Cheyenne can't help, but shake her head and a strangled laugh escapes her as a strained smile takes over her face.

Fuck, Gemma has no idea how much she has already failed her grandson as a mother.

…

Jax toys with the cap to his beer bottle. It's been a long day. They barely got their money from Lin after the fiasco with Opie. He thinks the only good thing is that they have a lead on Cameron and Abel. Despite that elation, he still finds himself in a sour mood. He particularly doesn't want to go home to an empty house either. Without Cheyenne there, the house feel cold and empty. He thinks he might asks Lip or Opie if he can crash at their place.

Opie moves from the bar and comes over to seat next to him. It's quiet between them as they watch the guys mingle an Lyla and Ima walk through the doors.

Jax looks over at his best friend.

"What?"

"You'd kill to get your old lady out of her day job. All I want is mine to go back to hers."

"What do you mean?" Opie asks.

"Cheyenne keeps risking her career for the club. Now she apparently has some more days off."

"Maybe it's the best thing. All the shit she's been through." Opie tells him gently.

"Yeah, I don't know. I'm struggling with it. My old man's manuscript, he said there's only two ways an old lady makes it. Either you tell them everything or you tell them nothing. Anything else, shit falls apart."

"I didn't tell Donna anything." Opie reveals.

"What about this one?" Jax asks as he nods to Lyla as she approaches.

"I don't know yet." Opie admits.

"Hey, killer."

Jax watches with a smile as Lyla tangles herself around Opie.

"Finish this later?" Opie asks him.

"Nope." Jax says with a smile. Considering how Opie's night is going, he might be crashing at Lip's.

"Jax, Clay, you gotta see this." Juice says rushing out with his laptop and heading to the bar. "I just got an e-mail from the Belfast VP. This was taken six hours ago. Short Strand, Belfast."

Jax watches as Juice pulls up a photo of a dead Cameron Hayes with an army tag on his head.

"Cameron's in Ireland." Juice begins. "Then…"

"Where's Abel?" Jax finishes.