I kept walking in the shadows for hours, trying to keep an eye on the road but not walking on it. I had no desire into turning myself into a target. Each of my steps was more painful than the previous one. Chizuru was starting to get heavy now that I was more tired and with less adrenaline and the wound on my flank was still dripping with blood. I knew that the bullet was still inside, ripping my flesh. I could feel it.
« Hajime... »
My eyes went down to Chizuru's face, her eyes open and I sighed with relief.
« Where are we ? Where's everyone ? »
I didn't answer. I needed to put all my energy into walking to put as much distance as I could between her and the city. The sun was starting to rise and the riflemen will be able to aim with more precision again, putting us in danger.
« Hajime, I think I can walk... » she objected.
« No you can't. » i replied, panting.
She stayed silent again, looking at my face. I didn't know what I looked like in this instant but she started wiggling in my arms, trying to escape my grip.
« Chizuru, stop. » i said with authority.
« You're hurt. » she objected « let me see. »
« I am not. » i replied, using my toneless voice.
« You're lying. I can see the sweat on your face, the way you ground your teeth in pain, the difficulty you have to move your body. So now, stop lying to me and Put. Me. Down. » she said with as much authority as I used and I smiled a little.
« Alright. » i surrendered « wait a second. »
I went deeper in the forest and found a secure spot surrounded with bushes, hiding us from unwanted eyes. I lied her down and sat next to her.
« Where are you hurt ? » she asked.
« You first. » i replied with a voice that left no room for discussion.
I removed the bandage on her stomach made with my scarf and tried to get off the dried blood so I could see the curent state of the wound. The hole was still there but it was only a third of what it was. She was healing. Thanks gods, she was healing.
« Satisfied ? » she asked with a small smile « now show me yours. »
I nodded and opened my kimono and nagajuban to show her my side, where the bullet was painfully digging itself deeper in my flesh with each of my movements. She tried to get up but her wound was still too severe for her to move properly.
« I can't move... » she realized « You'll have to remove the bullet. »
I nodded. I knew that I'd have to do it myself anyway. I unsheathed my wakizashi. A shorter blade would be easier to wield for this kind of operation than my katana.
« Come closer. » she said to me. « I'll guide you. »
I did as she said and she looked at my side with attention before speaking again, putting her finger a bit lower under the bullet hole.
« Cut here. Not too deep, about 5 cm. Be careful for your liver if you go too high. And stay really on the side overwise you could pierce a kidney. »
I did as she said, hissing in pain. I've been wounded before, a lot, but practicing surgery on myself, that was a first.
« Good now plunge your fingers inside the wound. That will be very painful. The bullet must be just above the cut, probably you can grab it. »
She was right. It was extremely painful but I managed to extract the bullet.
« Can we make a fire ? » she asked.
« No. » i shook my head « There are still enemies out there. »
« Then we can't cauterize. You'll have to bandage and change it regularly until we can do something better. »
I cut the bottom of my nagajuban and made a tight bandage around my stomach. I was feeling better already now that the bullet was removed but I still wasn't in really good shape. I wanted to stand up to start walking again but she caught my shoulder.
« You're not going to walk in your current state. »
« Chizuru, we need to reach Osaka. » i explained.
« That can wait. Now you rest. » she said, furrowing her brows.
« It cannot wait. We need to get there as quickly as possible. »
« You do not move. » she ordered in her commanding princess voice « Hajime, you look terrible. You need to rest otherwise you'll just kill yourself in exhaustion. »
She was right. I would have listened in normal circumstances but there were too many enemies. The Choshu, the Satsuma... The more hours pass, the more they could organize themselves and start to hunt the remaining shogunate allies down. And Kazama... Amagiri told me to run to protect her. Maybe he was already following our tracks.
« Hajime, if you start walking again, you'll only be a moving target, easy to spot. » she said, grabbing my sleeve. « This spot is perfect for hiding and Kyoto is already far behind. Let's rest and wait for the dark to hide our steps. In a few hours, I will be totally healthy and I'll support you, just like you supported me. So... Please, rest... Please... »
I nodded grudgingly and lied next to her, letting the bushes be our natural shield. My wound was the worst I ever had and the pain was violent but the relief to see her heal was far more intense. She could make it. Maybe without me but she could make it and that was the only relevant thing. We just needed to keep walking and reach Osaka.
Even if I was eager to continue our route, I felt the exhaustion taking me and I fell asleep, resting just like she ordered me to. I don't know how long I slept until the gunshots woke me up. They were close and moving in line. They would probably find us.
« We need to go. » i said to Chizuru and she stood up with difficulty but still managed to walk. We moved from our spot, looking all around us to be sure we weren't seen and tried to make no sound. We needed to move silently and that was easier for me than for her. She never had all the training I had.
« If we continue this way, we will be able to reach Osaka before morning. » i told her, trying to sound confident.
« I can't wait for the dark... These gunshots are terrifying... » she muttered in response.
We kept walking together and her steps were getting more confident. After a while, I could decipher that she was totally healed. That should have been relieving me and it did but I also felt angry. She was walking normally, her steps assured while I was panting, holding my side, trying to ignore the pain in my wound. I felt weak, unworthy. And having her all healthy next to me wasn't really helping. I hated that she could witness me in this state.
« Let me help you. » she said, passing my arm around her shoulders so I could use her as support.
« I don't need you help. » i replied a lot harsher than I wished i had.
« Now isn't the time for misplaced sense of pride, Hajime. » she answered, ignoring my protestation.
She helped me walk until twilight set and we were able to relax a bit more. The gunshots became less numerous and faded until they disappeared completely. The dark was protecting us. Only a few more hours and we would be at the doors of Osaka castle. I didn't know how they'd welcome me there... A captain without a division... I lost all my men, even Tetsuya, near the Ryu'un temple and I fled, not even honorable enough to die with the rest of them. Maybe they will ask me to seppuku to clean my name. I didn't care. The only thing that mattered was to put Chizuru to safety. If I died before reaching Osaka or if they asked me to perform ritual suicide, it wouldn't matter as long as she is safe. I would die with honor, protecting what I sworn to protect.