Chapter 58.
Dean woke feeling less than refreshed. Sleep had been elusive following what now seemed a rather rash set of promises at the bar. He hoped he wouldn't regret making them. Already, he was dreading carrying them out. Sam and Cas had been supportive, as he had known they would, but the hard part was on him alone and he wasn't sure he was ready for it.
It was almost 5 am and that seemed to be a good time to shower and grab a furtive breakfast. He made the shower a little cooler than usual, to wake himself up and then he headed to the kitchen.
His mother and Cas were already there, drinking coffee. "Good morning, Dean." she said. Something about her smile told him she knew about his decision.
"Cas has told you ... " he began.
"Sam told me." she said, "He and Jack were up early."
"This is early." he said.
"They were up earlier. They just got back from a walk."
"Well, anyway, you know that I plan to ... " his voice tailed off as the right words failed to reach his brain.
She hugged him. "Yes and I'm very happy about it. Even more happy that you plan to let us all support you."
"I think I'll need all of you." he said, gently disengaging from the hug.
"I'm going to be bringing food across from Sarah's place this morning." she said, "But if you need me, now or at any time in the future, I will be there."
"Thanks." he said.
Cas had stood up. "Would you like some eggs?" he said.
"Yeah, eggs would be great, thanks." said Dean, "And happy birthday, Cas."
"It's not really my birthday." said Cas.
"It is now. You need to learn to respond to happy birthday with 'Thanks.' and not with denials that you have any such human thing as a birthday."
"The whole thing seems very unsettling this morning." said Cas, carefully breaking eggs.
"Yeah, I know." said Dean, "You don't like being the centre of attention."
"You two will tell me if I seem about to make a fool of myself, won't you?" said Cas.
"Don't worry." said Mary, "I can make sure I stick around a lot at the party. But I don't think you'll do anything wrong. You worry a lot more than you need to. Everyone here knows and loves you."
"I don't want anyone to feel I'm ungrateful." said Cas.
Dean went over to the stove and watched the eggs frying. He looked at his anxious friend and said, "It'll be a great party. Do you want to take the keys off, so I'll know if you need to be rescued?"
"No!" said Cas quickly, "No, that's not a good idea. But thanks for offering to give up their protection."
Dean saw the fear in Cas's eyes. He understood. He regretted making the suggestion. "It's fine." he said, "We've got your back, always, with or without freaky psychic crap. But I'm not staying too close at the party, because you'll be dancing with Jules."
"Will you?" said Mary, smiling at Cas.
"It's just a friend thing." said Cas, but with just the right amount of bashfulness to suggest it could be more than that.
"It's okay. We won't tease you about it." said Mary, "Will we, Dean?"
"Me? I never teased anyone in my whole life!" he said.
"He won't." she said to Cas, "I'd better find Ryan. We have some logistical details to work out. Just relax, Cas. You'll have a great birthday."
When she'd gone, Cas served up the eggs and said, "If Jules does want to be more than friends, what do I do?"
"Well, personally, I'd let her." said Dean, sitting down and starting to eat the fried eggs.
"I mean, how does that work? How do you go from friends and colleagues to ... "
"The horizontal lambada?" said Dean.
"Isn't it a hoedown?" said Cas, confused.
"Okay. Let's not use euphemisms." said Dean, "That's where I went wrong there. It's best not to overthink this stuff. You like Jules, right?"
"Yes. She's intelligent. She's committed. She's ... "
"She's hot." said Dean.
"Yes." said Cas.
"And she's one of the kindest, most understanding people we know, so she won't point and laugh if you make a move and she's not interested."
"They point and laugh?" said Cas, retreating into his coat like a snail into its shell.
"Not her. I'm sure she doesn't." said Dean.
Sam came in. "Good morning. How did you sleep?"
"No time for that now." said Dean, "We're planning how Cas can make a move on Jules."
"Just don't, Cas." said Sam, "Let her make the move."
"That's stupid advice." said Dean, "What if she doesn't?"
"I think she will." said Sam.
"You do?" said Cas.
"I do. And I think that's gonna work better than you trying to be smooth and trying to be Dean when smooth is not your thing and Dean is not her type."
"I am every woman's type." said Dean, "Like Type O negative blood. Universal donor."
"You have no idea how creepy that sounds, do you?" said Sam.
"So, you told Mom and I'm guessing your little walk with Jack was to tell him. What's the matter, Sam? You don't trust me to keep my word?"
"You wanted us to make it harder for you to back out, remember?" said Sam.
Dean remembered. It was, after all, why telling them had seemed so important the night before. "You're right. I did. So, thanks." he said.
Sam smiled at him. "I'm impressed."
"So am I." said Dean, "And also a little terrified."
"Growth is always frightening." said Cas, "It frightens me, anyway."
"Are you having second thoughts?" said Sam to Dean.
"Every second." said Dean, "But what I said last night is all still true and that means I need to try."
"You're not alone." said Cas, sitting down at the table, "You have your army."
"Yes, I do. And you have yours, so don't worry about the party."
Sam sat with them. "Listen, Cas, Jules really likes you, so just relax and let your relationship grow naturally."
"But don't get friendzoned." said Dean.
"What's that?" said Cas.
"That's a myth. Most people marry a friend." said Sam.
"Let's leave marriage out of it for now." said Dean.
"Friendship can always turn to love." said Sam, "There's nothing wrong with being friends."
"I would hate to lose her friendship." said Cas.
""Exactly." said Sam, "You already have something great. So don't get all anxious trying to turn it into something else. If it's gonna happen, it's gonna happen."
"Sam, this is why you only get laid once every five years."
"That isn't true." said Sam.
"Well, whatever. Sometimes, you need to make things happen. He can at least flirt a little. He's got that sweet, baffled, vulnerable thing going on. He can capitalise on that."
"I don't really know how to flirt." said Cas.
"See?" said Sam, "Now you've got him anxious again."
"Then stick to the basics. At least tell her she looks good." said Dean.
"That never hurts." said Sam, "But don't try too hard."
"Look down, then just raise your eyes a little. They love that." said Dean.
"Would you stop?" said Sam, "Your tricks are great, for you, but Cas has sincerity and that's his secret weapon."
"This all seems a lot more complicated than I thought." said Cas, "And I can't really see it going anywhere anyway."
"You're an angel." said Dean.
"Yes, and she could have anyone she wanted." said Cas, "I'm hardly a great prospect."
"Don't put yourself down." said Dean.
"I spend a lot of time dead. I have one outfit. I don't know how cars work and most of my knowledge of sex is theoretical." said Cas.
"Same could be said of Sam." said Dean.
"Could it?" said Sam.
"Anyway, today, you'll have the cowboy hat."
Cas smiled. "I think just friends is fine. I like having friends."
"You like having sex." said Dean.
"Yes, but the whole torture/death thing afterwards is less fun."
"That's not a usual part of the process." said Dean.
"No, but there do seem to be a lot of potential complications." said Cas.