(Noah)
Mom grabs Elle to talk about some wedding idea or other as soon as we walk back into the house for dinner. Elle and I spent the afternoon sitting by the pool, reading and occasionally swimming, and maybe that kind of relaxed idleness should be our plan for the next few weeks. Then, before leaving our apartment, Elle slipped the ring onto her necklace and tucked it into her shirt, to avoid having it spill the news early yet again.
With Elle spirited away by my mom, I figure I'll go find Lee, but that plan is put on hold once I walk into the living room to find Mike staring at me with an odd smile. Odd and a little intimidating.
Elle's dad didn't always scare me. In fact, growing up, he usually seemed a lot chiller than my dad. That is, until I started dating his daughter. Strike that, until he first started to suspect I might want to—that's when the flinty stares started. I'll grant that I gave him plenty of reasons to be wary of me, and I don't blame him for how long it took him to trust me. But he always trusted Elle, which is why he never stood in our way. Of course, instead of standing in our way he stood just off to the side, watching. Not actively opposing the relationship, just watching, always. By the time Elle joined me in Boston I think Mike trusted me, but he still never stopped watching.
The few times I saw Mike those two years Elle and I were broken up were painfully awkward. I was so relieved to see him recovering well, so far beyond Elle's and my whispered fears those first days after the accident, but the disaster of the breakup hung between us, unmentioned but poisoning any chance at normal conversation. But Mike was definitely still watching me those few times, and I don't think I was imagining the hard edge to his expression as he watched me. I don't know what Elle told him about the breakup, what he thought had happened, but it didn't matter because I knew I deserved those glares.
So Mike's reaction this spring has been somewhat surprising. Surprising, and gratifying. Despite it all, he still trusts us, trusts us to work this out, and wants us to work this out. At least, that's the only explanation I can find for why he waited for Elle to be ready to tell me and why he's been so hands-off all spring. Of course, I know this second chance he's giving me is a one-time deal. Screw this up and there will be no more chances. But I don't plan to, and I think he knows that. Always has known that, even if it took him a long time to be confident I'd manage it.
But yeah, all that to say... Mike does scare me, just a bit. Especially right now, when he's grinning at me with that slightly wolfish light in his eyes.
"Noah, so good to see you again so soon. Did you two have a nice dinner last night?" The after I interrupted your makeout is implied.
"Yeah, we did. Sorry for stealing Elle away without warning, though." The apology for the awkward moment is also implied.
"Oh, no apologies needed, especially as it seems you've arranged for a replacement dinner tonight. Your mom sounded very enthusiastic about these spur of the moment family dinner plans, by the way. Even insisted I make sure Brad could be here."
And that's when I realize he knows. I thought he might, given the looks he's been giving me, but now I'm sure of it.
"I'm glad you could both make it. Elle and I were really hoping to see everyone tonight." I can't help grinning a little.
"It's always nice to have a family dinner. Especially with you kids growing up, moving out, starting families of your own. So much good news to celebrate, lately. So many... long-awaited moments."
He's grinning too, even if his grin is a little scary.
"So Mom tipped you off?" I finally ask, probably more sheepish than I'd like.
"Oh, no. Well, not explicitly, and not just her. Give me some credit, I do know you all rather well. When you flew home early, when Elle couldn't stop giggling as you two left the house, and then when your mom sounded like she might actually explode with joy when she called to tell me we should all have dinner together as soon as possible..."
"We should have come and told you first." I offer apologetically.
"No, this is just fine. I'm looking forward to seeing how Elle decides to tell us. Or were you going to make the announcement?"
"It was going to be me. Elle is in charge of the rest of the news."
"The rest of the news? There's more?"
"You'll see."
Mike looks like he wants to ask, but he doesn't. Instead he just keeps watching me with that quiet intensity of his.
"Should I... have talked to you first?" I finally ask.
"Talked to me about... proposing?" Mike looks a little confused.
"Yeah." I'm fairly certain I know what Elle would say about whether I should have talked to her dad, and I agree with her, but that doesn't mean he does.
"This development isn't exactly unforeseen. If I'd had concerns, I'd have raised them long ago. With Elle." Mike gives me a pointed look that quickly turns amused as I match it.
"Good, because I'm pretty sure she'd kill me if I'd talked to you before her and she found out."
"I'd have a lot more concerns about all this if you didn't know that." Mike laughs. "But I don't. You know that, right? You two... I'm proud of both of you. And happy for you. Happy for all of us that you finally worked things out."
Mike finishes his drink, then leans awkwardly to set the glass down on the coffee table and brace himself to stand up from the couch. He hides the stiffness of his left side well, but every glimpse of it is a reminder of how close we came to losing him. I hesitate briefly, then stand and offer him a hand. He hesitates, too, before letting me help him up.
"I've been getting a lot of practice with Elle, lately." I tell him, hoping to reduce the awkwardness.
"And is she just as stubborn about never needing anyone's help as I am?"
"There is a certain family resemblance, yes." I admit.
"I never got a chance to thank you for everything you did after my accident. I hope you know it meant the world to me."
"You did thank me, actually. Several times, at the hospital. But you didn't need to."
"Did I? That must have been while I was still doped up."
"You were a little... hazy, sometimes." I smile.
"Well, I'm glad I thanked you then, but I'll do it again anyway. You were the best fake son in law I could have asked for."
I hadn't expected that, or the sly grin it was said with. "So you do remember some of our conversations back then."
"That one was memorable. For a few seconds there, I really did think you two might actually have gotten married."
"Well, this time we're telling you first. Like I promised."
"Good. But I'd be glad even if you'd eloped and told me later. Or if you never got married, if that's how you both preferred things. You two... well, it's been a long road, and I won't pretend it's been easy to witness, as a parent. But nothing has made me happier than seeing you make the most of this year. But enough of all that. I've got to save some of these sappy dad pronouncements for when you actually give me the news. I promise to look surprised. Maybe even threaten you a little, for good measure." Mike smirks.
I grin back at him as he walks out of the living room. I suspect we'll still manage to surprise him tonight, but I'm letting Elle share that part of the news.
Actually making the announcement turns out easier than I thought. I do it soon after we've sat down to dinner—between Mom looking ready to burst, Lee constantly shooting me and Elle knowing grins, and Mike watching me with that unsettling gaze of his, it's more than obvious something is up.
"Before we all get started... there is a reason we're having this dinner, beyond the usual reasons. And several of you already know it, because it turns out it's hard to keep quiet about good news. So this may or may not come as any kind of surprise, but Elle and I... we're getting married."
I spent a while this afternoon wondering how to phrase the news. Elle's agreed to marry me sounds like it's some chore she's giving in to. I asked Elle to marry me leaves out my favorite part of this story, that this was all Elle's doing. After almost seven years, multiple breakups, a whole lot of stubborn idiocy, and one serendipitous contraceptive failure, we've finally decided to admit that's Mom's fondest dream and Lee's worst nightmare really is our destiny probably isn't funny to anyone but me.
So, once again, I go with simple: we're getting married. And now I'll let Elle decide how to tell everyone exactly how soon that's going to happen.
The reactions are about what I would have predicted. Mom tears up even though this isn't news to her, Mike pulls Elle into a bear hug and they trade private whispers, Brad shrieks really?, Lee puts on a show of gagging and groaning, and my dad... well, Dad may actually look thrilled, at least by his standards. Which isn't why we're doing this, but isn't unwelcome either.
"Because you want to, right?" Dad warily eyes me from across the table.
"Why, do you no longer think we should?" I respond curiously.
"Of course I do. But what I think isn't reason enough to do it."
It's possible my dad has been replaced by an alien.
"Don't worry. How often has you wanting me to ever been my reason for doing anything?"
"Fair enough. And don't get me wrong, I'm very happy for this news, if it's what the two of you want."
"It is. And that's the only reason we're doing it."
"Good. Then I'm glad. Very, very glad. You and Elle—I'm sorry if I gave you the impression I didn't trust you two to figure this out. I do, and I should have from the start."
I give Dad a shrugging smile and bite back the temptation to respond sarcastically. He's trying, and I appreciate it. Elle is still talking to her dad and Mom is busy hassling Lee about his reaction to the announcement, so I guess I'm stuck talking to Dad a little longer.
"Maybe I shouldn't even bring this up, but... if getting married is what you want, there are advantages to doing this sooner rather than later. Before the baby, if possible. I know that's probably not the kind of wedding Elle and your mom have in mind, but it would make a lot of things easier. It's all up to you, of course, but just—something to think about."
I'm tempted to laugh at exactly how long Dad's newfound commitment to trusting us to make our own decisions lasted, but a better idea strikes me.
"Hey, Elle?" I reach for her shoulder to get her attention.
"Yeah?"
"Want to get married, like, next week? Just a totally wacky idea Dad wanted me to throw out there."
Elle looks at me like I've lost my mind, then gets it and grins back at me.
"That sounds good. Sure, why not? Maybe Saturday after next, so we can get Adam down here?"
"Saturday works for me. Good, so that's settled; next weekend it is. Thanks, Dad, great suggestion." I go back to placidly serving myself some of the pasta salad.
Dad and Mike are both staring at me now, while Mom is failing miserably at containing her laughter. Lee is equally entertained, while Brad just looks confused.
"Is this a joke, Noah?" Dad asks.
"No, I'm dead serious. It's a great idea. Right, Elle?"
Elle is giggling, then rolls her eyes when I make no move to elaborate further. Hey, this part was her crazy idea, she gets to explain it.
"I, ah, I'd kind of already convinced Noah that we should get married right now. I mean... it's been long enough, we don't need more time wasted. That's what I was starting to tell you, Dad; that we want to get married now. Which is insanely short notice, I know, but June's agreed to help make this happen. So I'm glad to hear you approve of this plan, Matthew."
"Next Saturday? As in twelve days from now?" Elle's dad asks her, looking equally stunned and amused.
"Yeah. Unless you've got plans already. You did say you wanted advance warning the next time we got married."
"The next time? Was there a wedding you've forgotten to mention, Noah?" Dad asks, and from the look on his face I think he might actually be worried there was. Even Mom looks mildly concerned.
"No, no other weddings, I promise." Elle quickly clarifies. "It's just that when Dad was in the hospital, Noah told people we were married so they'd give him updates. So when Dad found out, we promised we wouldn't actually get married without telling him. Or any of you. Which is why we're telling you this, rather than running off to Vegas or something."
"So you're really doing this? Getting married, right now?" Dad asks, sounding unsure. He's always suspicious when I agree with him on anything.
"Really doing this. Legally and everything, assuming Mom finds us an officiant."
"Already taken care of. Carol said she'd be thrilled to." Mom smiles.
"Carol? Crazy cat lady Carol?" Lee asks.
"She prefers to go by the Honorable Judge Robinson at work. But yes, my friend Carol, whom I'll pretend you didn't just call that. And she said there's a rooftop terrace at the courthouse where she's done several weddings, unless you have some other location picked out. She sent me some pictures, and I thought of a few other options you should check out."
"See, this is why we put you in charge of planning." Elle grins at Mom.
"I'm surprised she's not killing you for depriving her of that big elaborate wedding she's been plotting for years." Lee marvels.
"Oh, this just means you're going to have to have that big elaborate wedding. Sorry about that." Elle laughs.
"Are you guys still going to be around by the time Lee gets married? There's got to be someone out there who'd say yes, but the odds of him finding her..." I trail off.
Mom smacks my shoulder. "You realize it was your wedding I used to doubt I'd live to see, right? Let alone grandchildren."
"Yes, well, we definitely don't have to worry about that anymore." Mike says with an admirably straight face.
"So, tonight was fun," I comment to Elle as I return from brushing my teeth. She's sitting up in bed, reading, and I see she's once again stolen one of my shirts to sleep in.
"Yeah, it was. But you've got to warn me when you decide to mess with your dad. I thought you'd lost it for a second there." Elle smiles softly, and as she closes her book I realize it's The Blue Castle. She must have brought it back from her house yesterday.
"Can I borrow that sometime? I never got a chance to finish it, and I still want to know if Barney murders her."
"He can't murder her, he's the love interest. That's not how romances work."
"Yeah, the love interest with a mysterious past and an even more mysterious secret room he's forbidden her from entering."
"Do you actually want me to tell you and spoil the ending?"
"Go ahead."
"No, on second thought I'm going to make you read it. Aloud. To me. While I float in the pool. With an iced lemonade."
"There's no way I can say no to this plan without you laying a guilt trip on me about how many times Dinah kicked your ribs today, is there?"
"Nope."
"I'm not sure you can blame that on me, though. Fondness for kicking is really more of a soccer thing. "
"Fine. The guilt trip will be about how many times she's punched me today."
"You know I haven't actually punched anyone since, like, high school, right?"
"Glad to hear it, but that doesn't change who she got it from."
"Okay, you win. Pool, lemonade, dramatic reading. But I'm giving Barney a creepy murderer voice."
Elle laughs, then looks down at the book again, fussing with her bracelet. She looks nervous all of a sudden, and I wonder what caused the change in her mood.
"I never got a chance to thank you. For the book." She finally tells me.
"Don't worry about it. I'm just glad you had it."
Elle flinches. She looks like she's about to say something, stops, then looks up with a hesitant expression.
"I didn't. Not until now. I never saw the box you sent, not until yesterday. I was going to tell you when you got back, but then we got distracted."
"You never saw it?" I wonder if Elle was so angry at me back then that she never opened the box. At least she saved it, though.
"Lee packed it with a bunch of my winter stuff, and I never finished unpacking that box. Not until yesterday." Elle admits, looking pained.
"He didn't tell you?" Then again, neither did I. I figured the ball was in Elle's court, and when she never called I took that as my answer.
"I mean, he did send it to me. It was reasonable to assume I'd actually open all those boxes full of my stuff. And I did—just not all of this one. But I wish I had."
"Yeah, well, I wish I'd told you I'd sent it. And I should have —"
Elle reaches to squeeze my arm. "Stop."
"Right. We're done rehashing, I know." In a way, finding out Elle never found the box almost helps. She wasn't ignoring my note, she just had no idea.
"Thanks for it, though. I loved everything. And it's not like it went to waste, it was just... delayed. But I'm glad to have that mug back, and my favorite sleep shirt. And one day you'll have to tell me how you found this book."
"Is that what changed your mind, finding the box? I guess that means you also found the note."
"I did, but that's not what did it. Maybe it drove home how much time we'd wasted, but it was everything else in my room that changed my mind. Or made me realize I didn't need to change my mind, that I'd wanted this for a long time and for a hundred reasons unrelated to this baby. I mean, Dinah's also a reason, and I realize now that's not a bad thing. But I'd want to marry you regardless."
"Maybe in a little less of a rush?" I smile at her.
"Maybe. Although I'm liking this whole no-worries, just-let-June-do-it approach."
"You know Dinah's just bonus for me, too, right?" I know she does, but it bears repeating.
"Yeah, I do."
Elle sets the book down on her bedside table, then curls up alongside me. She's quiet as I reach to turn off the lamp and then wrap an arm around her, and for a minute I think maybe she's fallen asleep already. But then she speaks up again.
"Do you remember the note?"
"Mostly. Not the words I used, but what I wanted to tell you."
"When you said the offer stands... what did you mean?"
I pause, trying to remember. "I'm not sure. Probably that if you ever changed your mind about letting me stay in LA, I'd come back. Whenever."
Elle stays silent, and after a beat I ask her "Why?"
"It's just... I guess I was thinking about the fight again, and that proposal. And I wondered whether that was the offer you meant."
"Probably not. I doubt I thought there was any chance that would change your mind. Why? Would it have helped, to have actually proposed, and not in the middle of a fight?"
"No, it would probably just have freaked me out more. I just wondered, when I read the note. But you're right, that's not what you meant."
"Well... I don't think it's what I had in mind when I wrote the note. But it was true that offer stood, too. The proposal, I mean. I'd been thinking about it for a while."
"I wonder, sometimes—where we'd be now, if you'd stayed. If I'd let you."
"Does it matter? I like where we are now. And where we're going."
"Yeah, I know. And I do too."
It's minutes later, as I'm falling asleep, that I hear Elle again, whispering.
"I think we would have made it work. I always told myself we couldn't have, but I'm realizing now... we could have done it. We probably would have. And I don't mean this in a regret kind of way. It's just—I underestimated us. And that's why I'm confident now."