The feeling of security was hard to come by for many people. Ally never experienced anything like that growing up or most of her adult life. Part of the reason she became the Black Widow was to feel safe in some way. She lost that feeling when she got involved with Johnny Zacchara. No one person ever made her feel safe, except the man holding her at the moment.
Ally smiled up at the sleeping man next to her. She felt security hold her naked body against his. The peace she experienced staring up at him, was very new to her. She wanted every moment with Jason to be like this. She craved for the man lying next to her to remain as carefree as he was at that minute. Her wants weren't going to be possible due to his line of work. She would always feel secure with Jason, but feeling at peace wasn't always going to an option.
The young woman slowly pulled her body out of his grasp and slinked out of bed. She picked up Jason's nearby shirt and slipped it over her slender body. She smiled back at him as she walked towards the window, perching up on the ledge. She watched as the world speed by on the streets below. Watching everything made, Ally realized that she could only shut out the world for so long. So much awaited the pair once the opened that door.
"Hey, you," Jason uttered to her, rolling his body in the direction of her.
Ally smiled, "Hey. You should be asleep."
"Yeah..." he breathed out, stretching in the bed. "Maybe you're right, I mean you have worn me out the last twenty-four hours," he chuckled.
"Haha, I didn't hear you complaining before," she commented, walking towards the bed.
"I'm not," he mumbled, slowly sitting up. "So what was going on in that pretty little head of yours?"
Ally took a seat on the edge of the bed. "I was thinking about us and how I just want to stay here forever with you," she answered, looking down at her hands.
"I like that idea," he grinned, reaching for her hand. She gazed up at him with a small smile. "But I can see there is a lot more going on," he stated, causing her to look away. "Talk to me."
"I love you," she expressed, chewing on her bottom lip.
"I love you, too," he said back, squeezing her hand lightly. "What's going on?"
Ally sighed, "I wouldn't ask you to change who you are. I feel in love with you being you."
"I know..."
"But you need to know that your job scares me." Jason leaned back a little to study her more. "I've been seeing Dr. Collins for a while now. I confessed to him that I have been having nightmares."
Jason looked shocked when she informed him of what was happening to her. "Al, why didn't you tell me about these nightmares?"
"I'm telling you now. It's hard to talk to you about this, cause I don't want what is going on with me come between us," she explained, standing up and wandering back to the window.
"How would what you are going through affect us?" he asked, watching her every move.
"Jason..." she sighed, turning toward him. "Every time I have a nightmare or an attack like I had the day I left the hospital, it has to do with you. When you leave me late at night, I have an attack. When I wake up in the middle of the night, and you're not there I panic. When you work late, and I have to go to bed alone, I have terrible nightmares. Your job is causing me so much pain, and I didn't tell you because I don't want to you lose you," she admitted as tears fell down her cheeks.
Jason pulled his naked body out of bed, "Hey, you're not going to lose me."
"Right...your job just makes me feel scared. I mean, I can work with Dr. Collins on all this, but what do I do till then?" she asked, turning away from him.
"Stop, please," he begged her, wrapping his arms around her from behind. "Just stop thinking for a minute."
"I can't, Jason," she cried, leaning her head back on his shoulder. "I know nothing is going to change when it comes to your job, but you needed to know what was going on with me."
"You're right, and I'm glad you told me," he expressed into her neck. "I might be able to help you."
"How?" she asked turning to face him. "I want you to be you. I don't want you anyway else."
"You're hurting. I just want to help you not to hurt anymore," he mumbled, looking down at her. "I know I'm not a big talker about feeling, or anything really, but if we talk when something is bothering you, maybe that will help you," he suggested, kissing her forehead.
"I'm afraid to lose you," Ally breathed against his chest. "I'm scared that I'm going to wake up one day and you're going to be gone," she stated as more tears fell.
"Shh," he whispered into the top of her head. "I can't promise you that nothing will ever happen to me, but I have a lot of people looking after me. Plus, I don't want to sound arrogant, but I'm Jason Morgan." She laughed softly. "I'm always careful, and I've been extra careful since you."
Ally slowly pulled away, gazing up at the man. She placed her hand behind his neck while leaning up on her toes, pressing a chaste kiss on his lips.
"I know this is a lot," she whispered as his forehead rested against hers. "And it's going to make you think a lot about what I said, but..."
"Don't..." He touched his lips against hers, trying to stop her from thinking too much. "We will figure this out," he promised, kissing her lips again.
Ally threw her arms around his neck, pressing her body against his. She wanted to hold onto him, and this moment for dear life.
"Hey," he whispered, feeling the urgency in body and kisses. "We get through this, I promise."
Ally nodded at his words, ready to return to their kiss when Jason's phone began to ring. The man groaned slowly pulling his body away from her.
"Carly?" Ally asked, collapsing on the bed.
Jason picked up the phone, frowning, "It's Sonny."
"Doesn't he know that we are away?" she asked.
"Yeah, this means something's wrong," he expressed, answering the phone. "This is Jason." There was a long pause before the man spoke again. "What do you want me to do?" His eyes drifted to Ally, who looked very disappointed. "Okay, I'll be there in a bit."
"I'll start packing," she mumbled, standing up, bending over to pick up a pair of pants close to her.
"Ally, stop..." he expressed, taking hold of her hand.
"No, you stop. You don't think I know that when Sonny calls, you go." Jason sighed. "Just go. I'll be okay. I'll meet you back at the penthouse," she mumbled, with a soft smile.
Jason didn't know how to take what was going on. He knew he should stay with her after what she had said to him, but Sonny needed him. He felt torn on so many levels.
"Ally, I don't want to meet you back at the penthouse. I want to stay here and take you dancing as I promised," he said, pulling on his jeans.
"It's fine. We can go dancing another time," she replied, biting her lip.
"You're disappointed," he commented, pulling a shirt over his head. "I don't want to disappoint you."
"But you can't disappoint Sonny either," she mumbled, picking up more of their belongings around the room.
"I have to go. I wouldn't if this wasn't important," he informed her, shoving his feet into his boots.
"I know," she whispered, leaning against the window ledge.
Jason pulled his leather jacket over his body, after retrieving his gun from the safe. He stared at the very sad woman standing across the room. He waltzed towards her, wrapping his arm around her waist, pulling her against his body. His lips captured hers roughly, while his finger entangled into her hair. When he finally pulled away, Ally's lips were swollen and her eyes were glazed over.
"I love you," he uttered on her lips while holding up her body. "Stay at the Metro Court, please. And when I get back, we will dance and make love all night," he promised, before kissing her again.
Ally just nodded at words. He kissed all the words out of her. No man ever had that kind of power over her. Her eyes slowly opened as she watched him slowly walk away from him.
"I love you, too," she was able to get out as he opened the door.
Jason smiled back, giving her a wink. The young woman watched him disappear, leaving her alone in their room. She knew that everything was going to be okay, she just prayed that she continued to think that way while Jason was gone.
Author's Note: I think I got most of the chapters connected. I have been writing up a storm cause I have been sick and I don't have anything else to do but sit in bed and watch television and write. I rewrote this chapter cause my first version wasn't really Jason, so I had to change it. I don't know if I did a good job here either. Love you all. Can't wait to read reviews. I need some more content with Brenda I know, but I think you'll like the chapter I wrote with her and Ally and Jason. SHe is still a bother to everyone LOL