Chapter 49

2008

Evan held his arms folded across his chest as he stared down at the isolation room and the prisoner tied to the bed. At the straps holding his arms and legs in place as Keller did all she could to stop the bleeding. The bandages Jonas had put on the prisoner lay discarded to the side. Piles of white cotton drenched in crimson.

Evan had fired that shot, had known who it was he was shooting and it was probably why he was in this situation now. He had missed on purpose. Despite everything he hadn't been able to bring himself to shoot to kill.

He balled his hands into fists, ignoring Carter standing by his side and not looking up when he heard the footsteps of Sheppard and Alex. They were coming. He'd sent Jonas to tell Johnson to call them here.

"What happened?" Sheppard asked and out of the corner of his eye, Evan saw Alex stiffen as she stepped close to the window and look down on the man lying on that table.

Sheppard addressed him again. "Major?"

Evan bit his lip and shrugged frowning without looking at Sheppard. "We talked to the village elders and on the way back to the Gate I saw movement in the underbrush." He closed his eyes for a moment and swallowed hard. "They were ambushing us, but they didn't really have a chance. I guess they wanted to strike first before we saw them… They all died there and then…. except for our friend here."

"Who is it?" Sheppard asked, hands on his hips as he followed Evan's gaze. Keller was looking up at them. They were standing in one of the observation rooms, the glass window providing them with the best view possible over what was happening down there.

She nodded once. "He'll get through," she said into her radio, but Evan didn't relax. He couldn't.

"Javier Pérez," Alex said tonelessly. "Formerly a Lieutenant in the Air Force and now a follower of Ba'al."

"Ah," Sheppard said with a pause… "Turncoats… love them. Why'd he switch sides?"

"Javier isn't coming, is he?" Alex was standing by the window, looking down at the street below. Javier should have arrived twenty minutes ago, and he was never late.

"No," Evan muttered, taking one of the wine glasses and putting it back on the shelf. The set of six large capacious wine glasses was a recent purchase from a flea market in the neighbourhood. Just as these things usually went, he and Alex had gone there to have a look around without any intention of buying anything. So, of course, they'd ended up with these glasses, a decanter and a set of ugly porcelain figurines, which must belong to a long-lost nativity scene. That, at least, was what the internet search on the stamps on the bottom of the figurines had turned up. Alex had conducted it upon coming back home. A blonde woman wearing a long, brown dress and a dark-haired man in wide, bulky pants and carrying a pitchfork. The set was standing on his bookshelf now and looking ugly and staring back at him. They still made him grin.

Not today.

"I'll try calling him," he said. It'd taken him weeks to get Javier to agree to come visit them, and now, about three days before they were set to travel to Alex's family, Javier had agreed to come over. Yes, Javier was grieving for the loss of his boyfriend, but he couldn't keep shutting himself away.

Alex cleared her throat and looked over her shoulder at him. They'd set the table. Dinner was ready and the three plates were sitting there, waiting to be filled. She came towards him, took the third plate and the cutlery lying next to it and shook her head. "Give him some time."

Evan hesitated. His hand was already hovering over the phone, just inches away from picking up the receiver as he met Alex's gaze and found his own suspicions confirmed. If he called Javier, who had wanted to quit the military, but, for some reason, hadn't resigned his commission yet, he, Evan woud have to go looking for him. He'd have to go over there, see if he was home. He would have to call others in his squadron and, eventually, if he couldn't find Javier, he'd have to report his absence if he suspected that Javier was trying to make a run for it. Was Javier going home? Was he trying to flee instead of resigning and possibly facing a couple of very uncomfortable questions?

Evan nodded. "Alright," he said. "I'll give him an hour."

"Give him two."

He couldn't do that. If he suspected, and he did, he'd have to report Javier. No matter how well he understood what Javier must be going through. Although… who would know?

No one.

And yet..

Swallowing hard, he picked up the phone and dialled. As he'd suspected, nobody picked up and Javier didn't have an answering machine. But, at least, now his phone record would show that he'd tried dialling Javier. He'd try again in half an hour or so, then again in an hour. That should be enough. It had to be enough. Who could tell when Javier had taken off. Or rather, if he'd taken off. He could only hope that his friend was okay. That he was on his way.

"Wine or water?"

"Water," he said. If he had to call his superior officer, he had to be sober. The thought alone made his stomach twist into a painful knot. He didn't want to do this. He didn't want to be that guy. The traitor. But he also had a duty to the Air Force. And, in a way, he had a duty to himself; to Alex. If it came out that he had kept his mouth shut, he could end up in trouble, and then where would he be? He wanted to be able to provide for Alex if it ever came to it. And not calling it in would get him into trouble. With a sigh, he sat down and closed his eyes as Alex's arms wound around his neck, her hands slowly moving down his chest. "Shall we eat?"

"Yep," he sighed and patted her arm. "Let's eat."

"Why, though?" Sheppard asked with a frown. "I mean, I get why Ba'al is here, I even kind of get why people start following him, but why people from Earth? This guy can't have been that desperate for religion, can he?"

Evan scoffed and shrugged. "I don't think religion has anything to do with it." He felt Alex move closer towards him. He could almost feel the warmth radiating from her skin as she stood next to him. Their arms weren't touching but they might as well be. Slowly, he raised his gaze to look at her profile, at the small nose, the round chin and the blue eyes behind the glasses.

"He wanted revenge," she said, clearing her throat, "for Sam. I guess Ba'al made him all sorts of promises. And he was a good engineer, a good pilot and-" she turned to look at Evan, "well, he was your friend."

Evan nodded again.

"Sam?" Sheppard asked incredulously and Alex shook her head with a look at Carter, who hadn't even flinched.

"His boyfriend," Evan explained. "He died over Bulgaria in '95. There wasn't anything either of us could have done to save him, but I alerted the base when Javier deserted… it was a mess."

Carter nodded. "Yes, I'm aware," she said and hit the button on her earpiece. "Jennifer, when can we talk to him?"

Keller turned to look up at them again and raised her hands. "A couple of hours at least."

"Give him something to wake him up," Evan said grimly.

"Major," Carter frowned at him, but he ignored the sharp tone in her voice. It didn't sting. It couldn't. Not with how numb he felt looking down at that once familiar face. The dark curls, the dimple in his chin, the ghost of that boisterous smile still lurking in the corners of his mouth.

"He knows where Ba'al is hiding," Evan added, throwing a look at Carter. "He knows-"

"Yes, but we won't risk a prisoner's health just to speed things up, Major."

"What happened anyway?" Sheppard asked. "Why did they ambush you guys?"

Even pressed his lips together and resumed looking down at Javier. They had him. Finally, they had a lead on Ba'al and they'd bring Javier to justice for what he'd done to Alex and for the role he'd played in Ba'al's operation. This was yet another reason why this was personal. He let out a long breath. "I don't know. We should ask him, I suppose."

"Nobody else survived?" Alex asked, almost hesitantly. "I mean-"

"No," Evan said, his voice cool as Keller left the room below. In a few minutes she'd be here to tell them the odds of Javier making it. Evan wasn't sure he wanted to hear it. The fact that he hadn't been able to kill him, didn't exactly mean he wanted him to live. Did that make him a coward? "Nobody." Jonas had shot the first assailant, Evan had hit Javier and Nabi had picked off the last one. "It happened too fast." It was an excuse, he knew that.

Evan put down the phone, his skin ashen grey.

Reaching out her hand, she guided him down to the sofa. It hadn't taken him long to make the call. His words had been reserved, well-chosen and had come out decidedly. The way they were supposed to. In a way he'd sounded a lot like her father had the day when he'd gotten his last assignment. The one which had sent him to his death.

She took his hand and she remembered exactly how much her parents had fought whenever her father was home. How much she'd hated her mother for constantly criticising her father when he was home. He wasn't home a lot, and why did she have to give him such a hard time?

Things were different now, of course. Nowadays Alex wished she'd been more understanding with her mother, but somehow Alex couldn't find it in herself to tell her mother that. Even if she now knew what it was like to be with someone whose only job it was to follow the chain of command and to be loyal. Loyal to a government. To a military commander. To his team. She knew her father'd had to follow orders, and sometimes even do things that went against his conscience. Just as Evan did. But Evan let her in. He let her see what it did to him. Not always, but sometimes. And Alex couldn't help but admire him for his conviction, even if she wished he didn't have to do this right now. This must feel like he was betraying a friend. But Javier hadn't been his friend in a while. Not really. Not since Sam's crash. Somehow Javier was blaming Evan for it. She'd seen it in Javier's eyes that one time they'd met after it had happened.

"What did he say?" she asked as Evan leaned back, his gaze fixed upon the ceiling.

"They're gonna start looking for him," he said, brushing his hand over his eyes.

She reached out to him, touched his hair, dark brown and silky under her touch. He leaned into her and wound his arms around her, his cheek resting against hers. He was doing the right thing. He had to be.