AN: "Hey! So i know we kinda saw this already when Riza thought Lust killed Roy, but I was wondering if we could get a fic where Riza finds out Roy is dead? I'll leave it up to you who finds him, how he dies etc etc I'm just in the mood for some sad Royai and your Royai fics give me life" - Anon

WARNING: CHARACTER DEATH

"I'm so sorry, Hawkeye," Havoc choked, tears falling down his face.

Her brain couldn't comprehend what was being said. She heard the words, but it just wasn't going into her brain, so she couldn't understand it. It was impossible. There was no way it could be true. A part of her was becoming incredibly angry towards Havoc that he would even make something like this up.

"They – They did all they could, but the internal bleeding was too great. They couldn't save him," Havoc continued, his voice barely above a whisper as he cried, relaying the situation to her.

But… They'd just gotten back from the lab yesterday. He'd cauterised the wound. He was all right.

To think, she'd lost him twice in such a short space of time –

Havoc grasped her elbow as she stumbled and continued to support her as they entered the Colonel's hospital room. The cut on his cheek had been bandaged up. The array on his hand was bandaged also, however some blood had been seeping through it. Her eyes focussed on the edge of the circle she could see in blood, and thought back to the time he'd dissected the tattoo on her back, how he'd talked her through the process of coming up with that array, and how it would all work.

It had been nice to hear that her pain and suffering at her father's hand hadn't completely been for nought. Despite his horror, Roy had been excited to begin working on studying the flame alchemy she'd offered him. Riza was excited too, but only because it granted them more time to spend together. She would be bare from the waist up, lying face down on her bed or her couch, as his hands ghosted over her flesh while Roy studied the ink, taking notes and sketching it in his notebook. She shivered whenever he made contact with her skin, but Roy had been too engrossed in his work that Riza didn't think he'd ever noticed. When his breath had skated over her back as he leaned in close to get a better look, she'd shift unintentionally in response, burying her head in between her arms in embarrassment.

It wasn't until the night he finished it – and successfully applied the knowledge to create fire with an alchemic array – that he told her he had noticed. Every shiver, every reaction to him she'd ever had while he studied, he noticed it. And that night, as they lay together in bed, Roy whispered how much he loved her. She'd gazed into his eyes, finally feeling happy.

Those black, yet loving, eyes that she would never set her sights on again.

Her mind was torturing her. How long would it be until she forgot what his voice sounded like? How long would it be before his face started to fade from her memory? How long would it be until she forgot that familiar scent of ash and burning that seemed to cling to him no matter how much aftershave he applied?

Her chest heaved in one rapid motion, the sound coming out like a wheeze. Her breaths were picking up in speed as the gravity of her situation finally hit her. Havoc placed a hand on her shoulder and said something, but Riza couldn't understand what the words meant. All she knew was that the man she'd loved for most of her life was lying before her.

Dead.

"Sir?" she called quietly to him through her sobs, reaching out to grasp his hand.

She pulled away in horror when she felt how cold his hands were.

Her sobs became louder, filling the hospital room that was now missing the machine that had held the steady heartbeat of Roy Mustang. When he'd been brought in yesterday, they'd said it was being connected just as a precaution. He would be fine, they said. He'd be right as rain in a few days, they'd said.

Those false promises had all turned to ash.

They'd needed the machine for another patient, Havoc had murmured. The doctors had taken away the one machine that allowed Riza to hear the heartbeat of the man she loved. The heart that Roy once vowed belonged to her, and always would.

Now she'd never hear it again, and that silence was killing her.

"He can't be gone," she whispered. "He just can't be."

"Hawkeye –"

"He was fine!" she cried, sobs becoming uncontrollable. "What happened?" she demanded, staring up her friend, no doubt looking desolate. Her heart broke when she saw Havoc's tears again, realising that this was her reality now. This was no dream. Roy Mustang was dead and there was nothing she could do to change that.

He wouldn't he walking through the door to save the day like he had the day before. He was lying cold and still in a hospital bed a few centimetres from her.

"There was too much internal bleeding," Havoc explained. "It was too late."

"But… But he cauterised it! He was fine!"

"Riza –"

"No, he was all right! What happened?" she cried desperately, looking to Havoc for her answers, but of course, he had none to give. "What happened to him?"

Havoc bundled her up in his arms and Riza clutched at the front of his jacket, sobbing loudly.

"Riza, I'm so sorry," he murmured into her hair, wetting it with his tears. "I'm so sorry." That phrase was repeated to her over and over again as they cried together. Havoc placed a kiss to the top of her head and hugged her tighter, holding her while she fell apart. Déjà vu hit Riza, her mind jerking her back to the day before where she thought he'd been taken from her.

Now he had.

And he wasn't walking through a door to see her again.