Here's a parody of the episode: The Smoking Peanut
Ah, the Royal Woods Zoo is having its Annual Free Day. Flip, wearing a mustache, is seen taking advantage of this day as he takes a bunch of free balloons. A gallon of free drinks. Also free...lightbulbs?
"Aha." He sees two cops walking his way and hides the lightbulb in his pants. His pants are filled with other free stuff.
"Top of the morning boys."
The cops walk past him and Flip sighs with relief. "Next stop, the gift shop."
He walks into the gift shop. Two Loud siblings, Lana and Leni walk by.
"There it is, Leni." Lana pointed to a stadium. "The Elephant Stadium. Not only does it have the largest elephant held in captivity, it also does tricks!"
Lana speaks like an announcer. "He balances on a ball with his trunk! Like a tightrope!
She balances on a balance beam with one arm. "Ta da!"
Leni gets excited. "Why are we hanging around watching a cheap imitation? Let's get over there!"
They run into the stadium.
"This is the greatest day of our lives!" They said in unison. They see an elephant sleeping.
"This is the greatest day of our lives?" Leni said. "Boring?"
"You're right, Leni. We came to see (announcer voice) ball balancing! (normal voice) Right? I'll try my elephant call."
Lana does her strange elephant call, but it doesn't work as the elephant is still asleep. Leni looked unimpressed.
"Well, I'm outta here. Thanks for nothing Lana." The older blonde walks off.
Lana sadly looked at the elephant. "Come on, come on. Wake up already!"
Then she gets out a bag of peanuts. She looks around to make sure no one's looking, then throws a peanut right at the elephant's head. The elephant stirs. "I think it's working!"
The elephant frantically looks around.
"Hey Leni, it's waking up!" Lana called. Leni came right back.
"Oh boy, did I miss it?"
"Nope. The show's about to begin!"
The elephant suddenly cries at the top of her lungs. Lana and Leni get blown away into the seats. The elephant stomps around, bawling. Two zoo employees come running into the arena.
"What's wrong with Trunkina?" One employee asked.
The other employee went to confront the elephant. "Easy, girl. It's me, Joe! Remember?"
The elephant makes an elephant noise with her trunk and uses her trunk to toss Joe out of the stadium.
"Now this is a show!" Leni said with excitement as Lana was nervous. Outside, the announcer speaks through
a megaphone.
"Attention zoo patrons! Trunkina, the elephant is on an emotional rampage! Please scream and run around in circles!"
The patrons did as they were told.
"Thanks for coming."
Inside the stadium, the elephant is still smashing things and making noises. The zoo worker goes up to the two Loud siblings.
"You girls better get out of this area, pronto! There's nothing more dangerous than an emotionally disturbed elephant!"
He points menacingly at Lana. "You didn't do anything that might have caused this horrible tragedy, did you?"
"Uh…"
"No way!" Leni said. "Only a jerk would upset a gentle giant. Right Lana?"
Lana hides the peanut bag. "Right."
She shrieks nervously. Trunkina chomps on a piece of metal.
Leni and Lana are leaving the zoo as citizens are running out screaming.
"Man, if I ever run into the guy who upset Trunkina, I'd have some things to say to him." Leni said. "Like "You're a big meanie" or "You're totes a meanie."
The two siblings are now back in their neighborhood.
"Are you sure you didn't see anything suspicious?"
"I already said I didn't, Leni, sheesh!" Lana goes to the front door of their house.
"Hey, let's investigate this crime and catch the lowlife who's responsible!"
"Give it a rest, Leni! There's no crime to investigate! Now go home!"
Lana went inside and slammed the door.
"But I thought I was home." Leni said.
Lana opens the door again. "Then just go to your room!"
"Ok." Leni said. She entered the house walked upstairs.
"Stupid Leni." Lana said as she slumped down. "I didn't do anything wrong."
She sat on the couch. "Ah, what am I getting all worked up about? I'm sure by tomorrow, this whole ugly mess will be a funny memory."
"What ugly mess?" Lucy suddenly appeared, startling Lana.
"Uh...the mess in my room." Lana fibbed. "Because it's really messy in there and I'll have to clean it ...Don't you have a poem to write or something?"
"Yes. Yes I do." Lucy said in her deadpanned voice and left the room.
Lana sighed in relief. "Maybe some tv will help me to get my mind off this incident."
She turned the TV on, showing Katherine Mulligan with the news.
"Our top story tonight: giant elephant has its feelings hurt! The only clue that could be found was this lone peanut."
Now Lana looked more worried.
"And as you can hear, the elephant continues to emit its horrible cry. A cry so powerful it can be heard around the world."
The TV shows people covering their ears in Egypt, Holland, and India.
"A cry that not only breaks the sound barrier, it breaks the hearts of our citizens!"
Lana stares at the TV with a look of guilt and horror.
"What kind of cruel, heartless, evil person would deliberately upset one of the world's most gentle creatures?"
Katherine wipes a tear from her eye. Lana turns the TV off. Lola was there, as she had witnessed the news too.
"Lana!"
Lana gets startled. "What?"
"Do you know anything about the elephant?"
"No! Why would I?"
"Well, you were at the zoo. And why are you being defensive?"
"Defensive? I'm not being defensive! Gosh! What is this? Twenty questions or something?" Lana goes outside and she can hear the elephant still bawling.
"This is getting a little out of hand. All I did was throw a peanut. I didn't mean to make the elephant cry. I just wanted to see it perform spectacular stunts! Man, everybody's gonna hate me! I-I need some advice! Now, let's see now. Who could never hate me no matter what I do?"
We cut to Lana knocking on Mr. Grouse's front door. "Mr. Grouse! Mr. Grouse! Oh, Mr. Grouse!"
Mr. Grouse opens the door. "Lana, do you have to knock so loudly?!"
"Sorry neighbor."
"Oh...that elephant is giving me a headache! I can't even take my afternoon nap!"
Lana chuckles nervously. "Funny thing you should mention that old elephant, because I...uh...was kinda wondering, um...let's say I know this guy who may have something to do with the elephant."
"You mean you know the guy who did it?"
Lana gulps.
"Oh, this is great! You and I can go turn him in! And then I'll get so much sleep, I'll be gorgeous!"
"Um, actually, I-I'm just talking hypothetically."
"You mean you don't know who did it?"
"Well, uh, I...uh...no."
Mr. Grouse slams the door in her face."Mr. Grouse?"
Lana walks away.
"Gotcha!"
Lana screamed as she encountered Leni, wearing a Sherlock Holmes outfit. Leni was looking at something on the ground with a magnifying glass.
"Where were you on the day of today? Don't play games with me!"
"Leni, what are you doing?"
"Oh, hi Lana. I'm just continuing my investigation of the Elephant Offender! I even made this detective's outfit."
"Um...have you found out anything?"
"Yes! No, wait, um...no. But this pebble looks suspicious. And so does this little piece of grass. And I've got a few questions for this chewed up gum."
Lana runs away.
"Don't worry, Lana! Leni's on the case! The truth will be revealed!"
"I better go see someone else." Lana said.
We see Lana in Lynn's room, as Lynn is covering her ears, trying to block out the elephant's shriek. "Oh, I can't take it anymore! That poor animal! What kind of thoughtless person would upset such a gentle creature?"
Lana is sitting on Lynn's bed. "Uh, that's kinda what I wanted to talk about, Lynn."
"Why, when I find out who caused that critter so much pain, I'll teach them a lesson they'll never forget!" Lynn tears her punching bag in half with her bare hands in front of Lana.
"So what did you want to talk about, Lanes?"
Lana twitched nervously, as she couldn't speak.
"Hey Lana, how come you're all twitchy like that?"
"Twitchy? Twitchy? Who's twitchy? I'm not twitchy! Sorry Lynn, I have to go take a bath!" Lana runs out of the room.
Lynn looked confused. "Since when does Lana bathe?"
Lana runs into the backyard. Leni shows up.
"Hey Lana!"
Lana gets startled and falls on her back.
"This is it! All of the clues are coming together. I followed these footprints right to the exact spot, and then, right where you're standing, I found this bag of peanuts! Ha! Oh, I'm so close to solving this crime, I can almost taste it!"
A zoom in on Leni's mouth and she appears to be licking Lana's head. It is revealed that she's licked a popsicle that's shaped like Lana's head.
"Boy, crime fighting sure makes me hungry! And this strange looking popsicle hits the spot!"
"Ok, uh, good luck with all that, Leni. Uh, I guess I'll see ya later." The little tomboy heads back inside. The rest of the family are in the living room.
"Lana, did you see the news?" Rita asked.
Lana sweater nervously. "Uh, news? I-I don't-"
"Open up! This is the police!" A police man was heard outside, which startled Lana. Lana opens the door. Two police officers enter. One flashes his I.D.
"Are you Lana Loud?" The first officer asked.
"Y-y-yes?"
"We've got a few questions for you. Were you at the zoo on the day of the elephant incident?"
Lana stutters. "Yes?"
"Did you or did you not take part in various activities of zoo time merriment?"
"Yes." Lana sinks down.
The officer holds up a Ziploc bag with "Exhibit A" written on it. There's a peanut inside. "And are you familiar with this peanut?"
"Yes!" Lana falls forward in front of the officer's feet.
"Just one more question...is it true that you were at the elephant's lair with a Ms. Leni Loud?"
Lana sobbed. "Yes! Yes! It's all true! The merriment! The peanut! The Leni!"
"That's all we need to know. Let's book her!"
The officer puts handcuffs on Leni. Lana and the rest of the family are shocked.
"Wow. You guys are good. I'm the last person I would've suspected, but I was looking for me all the time! It's like, the perfect crime!"
"Yeah, Yeah. Tell it to the judge, blondie."
The officers escort Leni out.
"Lana Loud, what just happened?" Lynn Sr. asked sternly. "Why is Leni going to jail?"
"It's-it's all my fault!" Lana said. "Leni's too sensitive for the big house!"
The police car drives off with Leni. Lana runs after it. "Wait! Stop! I'm the one you want! I'm the criminal!"
Back at the Elephant Stadium, a crowd of people are booing and yelling at Leni, as she's chained up.
"Hey everybody, let's throw peanuts at her and see how she likes it!" One guy yelled. The crowd throws peanuts at Leni.
"I get what I deserve." Leni said and attempted to catch all the peanuts in her mouth. "Ouch!"
Then Lana bursts into the stadium. "Wait! Hold your peanuts! Leni Loud is innocent! I have come here to reveal the truth! They say truth and honesty will be rewarded with trust and forgiveness!"
Leni hums in the background as Lana talks.
"I'm here to clear the table, to trim the branches of deception from the tree of life, to wipe off the unkempt filth from the face of truth! I-"
"Just get on with it already!"
"I am the one who threw the peanut! I know now that what I have done is wrong. And so I say, I'm sorry, giant performing elephant. I'm sorry, Leni. I'm sorry, citizens of Royal Woods."
Leni stops humming.
"Hey, let's throw peanuts at both of them!" The man yelled. The crowd yells.
"Wait!" A zoo worker objected."Here's the real criminal!"
The zoo worker pulls Flip over for the crowd to see, as Flip still has his fake mustache on.
"Uh, top of the mornin'!" His fake mustache falls off.
"Flip!" Lana said surprised.
The crowd gasps.
"I knew it!" Leni said.
"Flip has stolen something very important from the elephant." The zoo worker rips Flip's clothes off by accident. "Behold!"
The crowd gets disgusted.
"Wait a minute…" The zoo worker takes out a baby elephant. "Behold! Trunkina's baby elephant!"
The crowd gasps in shock. The worker returns the baby back to Trunkina. "Here you go, girl."
"Mama! Mama!" The baby elephant said.
"Wow." Lana said amazed. "The elephant had a baby. That means the elephant is a mother."
The mother and the baby elephant embraced each other.
"Awww…" The crowd adores the cute scene. Then they glare at Flip.
"But it's Free Day." Flip said nervously.
The crowd booed and threw peanuts at Flip, burying him.