Chapter 81: Leaving for Duty
November 15
Owen and Amelia said little on the way to the airport. Amelia was determined to not fall apart in front of the kids and to not display the anger that had occasionally emerged toward Owen during the past two weeks. Bronwyn, Oliver, and Finley were allowed to stay home from school so they could see Owen off. Derek volunteered to help Lynne out and to stay at the house with the babies. Although playing with his nieces was a delight, his true concern was being present when Amelia returned from the airport.
Bronwyn and Oliver were fairly upbeat in the car, as if this was just another day in their happy lives. The reality of Owen's departure was still murky and not real to them. Finley was soaking in everything that he had observed in the past two weeks. He was keenly aware of the silence in the front seats and attempted not to stare at his parents as he studied the scene. He felt a sense of responsibility toward his mom, much the way he used to feel about his bio mom, Kayla, after his father, Blake, died.
Finley was now at an age where he could sometimes successfully cover his emotions and simply paste on a convincing happy disposition. Since he'd heard about the deployment, that emotional shield had been his reality. In his room when he was alone, he would cry and worry that Owen would die and never return. He was scared that the chaos of the Hunt melee would be too much for one parent to lead. Internally, even though he slept little and his stomach was often in knots, he insisted to himself that he would need to rise to the occasion and be as adult as possible in order to help the family survive Owen's time away. The pressure he placed upon himself was immense.
Oliver, on the other hand, was deeply fascinated about his dad the "Army Man." He wanted detail upon detail of life in the tents in the desert. Where did they sleep? Since Owen was the boss, would he have his own tent? What did they eat? Was there TV? How many surgeries would he do a day? What kind of surgeries were most common? Did he get the weekend off? How many people lived at the base? Were there men and women there? How often would Owen see Army planes or choppers? Could he take pictures of them and send them to Oliver? Oliver provided the positive and curious outlook which helped balance the cold, flat, raw Amelia and the intermittently crying and scared Bronwyn.
As they approached the airport, Owen began reminding Amelia of various responsibilities she would have to assume while he was gone. "Mia, remember to help Richard out with the initial intern selection paperwork. And don't forget to have Patricia prompt department heads for their monthly reports – they always try to talk her out of having to do them."
"I have those written down, Owen. I'll take care of it," Amelia said with a raspy voice that emerged after a night of hell. When she wasn't sobbing and drowning in tears, she and Owen were making love and intimately saying goodbye. At times, the tears and the sex intermingled as the pleasure and pain co-existed.
"And keep track of the cars' oil changes – Marcus will take care of it, but you might need to remind him," Owen added. Marcus was the man who normally tended their yard and any handyman tasks inside or outside. "If you have any questions about the Victoria house, remember you can always call the neighbors. Their phone numbers are on my desk at home."
"Right," she responded numbly.
"I'll text you when I touch the ground in Denver – it's a quick layover, so I won't have much time. I'll be able to call you when we land in DC and then again when we arrive in Berlin. We should be able to connect at least daily while I'm in Germany. I'm not sure what I'll be able to do once we touch ground in the desert – I'll do my best to be in touch," Owen promised fretfully as last-minute details filled his head.
"I know you will," Amelia acknowledged without emotion.
"Dad, how many different airplanes do you get to ride on today?" Oliver asked with jealousy.
"Let's see… one, two, three. Three, Oliver. I'll be on airplanes for over 18 hours. Then I'll be in Germany for a few days before flying to my post. That last flight will last about 10 hours," Owen explained.
"Cool," Oliver exclaimed. "Will you take pictures of all of them and text me?"
Owen, without consulting Amelia first, had indulged and bought Oliver a smartphone as an early birthday present. The surprising gift and Oliver's joy helped assuage Owen's guilt even though Amelia's initial reaction darkened his mood. After quelling her anger, Owen learned his lesson. When he wanted to buy Bronwyn a new bike as her early birthday present, Amelia was a part of the process and decision making. When he saw his siblings getting early birthday presents, Finley had insisted on waiting until his actual birthday. Instead of giving Finley an early gift, Owen left something for him with Amelia.
Jackson and April were already at the airport when the Shepherd-Hunts arrived. Owen had asked April to accompany him to Kuwait and Jackson had reluctantly embraced the idea. The young couple had ridden the train to the airport, so Jackson would be returning to town with Amelia and the kids. For some reason, trusting that Jackson would see his family home gave Owen a sense of relief.
Jackson pursed his lips as he saw Amelia approaching. She looked hollow and empty. Her eyes were swollen and pink and her face seemed vacant. He had already been actively worried about her over the last couple weeks because she constantly looked drained and sad. Now, his concerns grew, and his heart felt heavy. He walked to meet Amelia and kissed her cheek, whispering to her, "I know. I'm here, ok? You're not alone." Without a word, she nodded in response.
As Jackson greeted Amelia, Owen and the kids said hello to Kepner. She picked Bronwyn up and commented on how much she'd grown. Oliver received a huge high-five and Finley entered into brief conversation about school. Jackson turned and shook Owen's hand. Internally, Jackson could not understand how Owen could leave his family and he was fairly disgusted by Owen's choice. Externally, Jackson tried his best not to let on.
Avery looked at his watch and told Owen and April, "You probably need to get through security. Your plane begins boarding in half an hour." Owen took a deep breath and knelt down to his kids, trying mightily to not tear up. He offered them all fatherly wisdom and encouragement, reminding them to be good and to send him lots of emails. Oliver wanted a selfie of the 5 of them with his new phone, so they squeezed in tight as Owen snapped the picture. He worked his way through each child, purposely saving Bronwyn for last so that she could anticipate her turn while he said goodbye to the boys. Had he said goodbye to her first, there was a strong possibility that she would sob and fall apart during the rest of the goodbyes.
He stood up slowly with Bronwyn on his hip and turned to ask Jackson to hold her for a minute. As he handed over Bronwyn, he also handed Jackson his keys. Avery was shocked to see Owen's usually steady hand shaking as he mumbled, "I'm afraid I'll forget to give these to Mia." Jackson nodded as Bronwyn nuzzled into his shoulder without speaking.
"Mia, I love you," Owen assured his wife as he embraced her tightly.
"Be safe, Owen. Please be safe," Amelia begged in his ear.
Owen released his hug and placed his hands-on Amelia's shoulders. Looking her in the eye, he advised, "Take care of yourself, ok? You're surrounded by people who are more than willing to help. Don't try to take everything on alone." Once again, her tightly pursed lips had found their way inside her mouth and between her front teeth. Her chin quivered and she blinked repeatedly.
"I love you, I. love. you," she whispered as she embraced him. "Come back to me in one piece, safe and sound."
Owen breathed audibly and leaned his cheek against hers, "I'll do my best."
The kids, Amelia, and Jackson watched Owen and April walk through security and waved a final goodbye. Jackson continued holding Bronwyn and Oliver was tightly grasping Amelia's hand. Finley rested his hand on his mom's shoulder. Amelia stood frozen, not moving after Owen left her line of sight. Jackson gently and quietly prompted, "Ok, guys, let's get back to town before traffic gets heavy." He placed a hand on Amelia's mid-back, nudging her to turn around and begin to depart. Looking deeply into her eyes, Jackson nodded slowly. There was nothing that could be said.
About three hours later, Oliver called out with joy, "Dad says his plane is on the ground in Denver. Look at the airplane pictures he sent me, Mommy!"
Amelia smiled broadly and celebrated with Oliver before encouraging him to show the pictures to Bronwyn and Finley. "Don't forget to text him back right away, he's moving from one plane to another really fast," Amelia reminded Oliver.
Another four hours later, as the family ate dinner, the house phone rang and all three older kids jumped up in a frenzy to answer the call. Elbowing their little sister out of the way, Finley and Oliver reached for the receiver. Bronwyn crawled around and jumped in an attempt to reach the phone just as Finley's longer arm beat out Oliver's stretch.
"Dad?" Finley answered.
"Hey, buddy. How are you? How's the day been?" Owen asked.
"Good. Dr. Avery talked Mom into letting us have drive-thru for lunch. We've all decided we like it when he drives," Finley reported with a slight laugh. "And Uncle Derek was still here when we got home so he played soccer with Ry and me before he sat down and talked to Mom for a while." Owen and Finley shared a few more interchanges before Oliver and Bronwyn each had a turn.
When she grasped the phone, Bronwyn sounded like a miniature adult as she asked Owen, "So how's the weather there?"
"The weather here?" Owen chuckled. "Actually, Bronwyn, it's snowing giant flakes of snow."
"You guys!" Bronwyn, without moving her mouth away from the phone, yelled for all to hear, "It's snowing where Daddy is!"
"Are you going to build a snowman?" his daughter inquired quite seriously.
Owen sounded disappointed, "I wish I could. It's later here than at home and I need to go to bed. Instead of flying to Germany tonight, my boss wants me to go to a meeting tomorrow. I need a good sleep before that."
"That's too bad. Does it make you sad?" Bronwyn wondered.
"I'm sad because I'm not there to tuck you in tonight, sweetie," Owen shared.
"I love you, Daddy," Bronwyn responded "and I'll miss you when I go to bed. Do you want to talk to Mommy? She's been waiting patiently."
"Hi," Amelia sighed as Bronwyn handed her the phone.
"Hey, ends up I'm staying in DC for 1-3 days. I'm going to be briefed on some emerging developments and do some remote consultations with other med units overseas. Typical Army SNAFU. And, of course, I don't have my dress uniform, so I'm heading to the Pentagon in multicams," Owen complained.
"What are those?" Amelia inquired naively.
"What I had on today. They're not what one usually wears to meetings at the Pentagon – it's what's worn in the field. I had no idea I'd be stopping in DC…" Owen trailed off, realizing Amelia probably didn't care about what he'd be wearing to the Pentagon. "Oh, well, I'll just have to embrace the suck."
"Ok," she said flatly. Amelia knew that the moment she allowed an emotion to crack her surface, she'd be swimming in a pool of tears.
"How are the babies?" Owen asked, trying to maintain conversation.
"Good. Ella's been cruising along the couch all day, which just upsets Gwen to no end. But Ria's crawling is coming along well. She seems to tire out easily, but she knows the motions."
"I miss you already," Owen stated quietly.
"Same, Owen…oh crap! I gotta go, Ella just fell. Finley, honey, take the phone," Amelia declared.
"Hi again, Dad," Finley answered.
"Is Ella ok?" Owen asked.
"She'll have a bump on her forehead, but she's not bleeding," Finley reported. "Mom will probably want her to get a scan at the hospital."
Chuckling, Owen agreed. Then he asked seriously, "Finley… how's Mom?"
"Just a sec," Finley commented as he stepped into another room. "Dad, I moved to another room so I can tell you about Mom and so I can ask you a question about girls."
"Ok…" Owen responded slowly. "Which topic first?"
"Mom. Dad, she's like she was this morning," Finley described. "She's like an empty version of Mom."
"Listen, buddy, this is a lot of responsibility to put on you, but I need you to do me a favor," Owen stressed. "Mom's just trying to not cry today, but if she keeps acting that way all the time, let Uncle Derek know."
"Ok," Finley agreed as Amelia came in with a sniffling Ella in her arms.
"There you are," she said with the first smile Finley had seen on her face all day. "Can I talk to Daddy?" Finley handed the phone back without getting a chance to ask his question about girls. He fussed over Ella before joining the other kids in the Dining Room. "Sorry – I didn't mean to cut you off like that," Amelia apologized with a hint of emotion.
"I understand. It's fine. How's my mini-me?" Owen inquired.
"She's got a big goose egg on her head," Amelia whined in baby talk. Ella began a fake cry as she heard her mommy's pity.
"Put her on," Owen begged. Amelia held the phone up to Ella's ear and told her it was her da. "Hey, babygirl… Mommy said you went boom. You'll be ok, sweetie," Owen softly comforted.
"Daaaa…" Ella sniffled as she reached out wanting her daddy to hold her.
"I love you, baby. Muah, muah, muah," Owen shared before Amelia returned to the line. "Hey, I'll have some time to chat tomorrow morning. Can I call you at 0600 your time?"
"Yeah, that'd be nice. We'll talk then. I love you," Amelia remarked.