CHAPTER 61

"My request for parole was denied. "

Father John frowned, surprised by this statement. Nearby, he felt Chris Marshall waving slightly beside him. Sitting on a chair, the priest swiveled in his direction, hands on his knees.

He hadn't expected it. The last time, Chris Marshall had hinted that it was acquired. That he would be released before the initial three years.

"I do not understand. You have always behaved well in prison" replied Father John sadly.

There was no reason to have his request denied. Chris Marshall had always followed exemplary behavior. He'd witnessed it, he like the guards of the penitentiary center in charge of his surveillance.

In his tone, Father John could guess a slight tension on Chris Marshall's face.

"They said it's not enough, apparently."

He felt Chris Marshall clench his fists. But Father John was not afraid. Chris Marshall wouldn't hit him. He had never fought in prison, after all.

"I try my best to go to all these workshops, I play sports, I try to contribute to community life ... and they reject my damn request!"

"I understand you are angry, Chris Marshall."

"No, you don't understand!"

His resentment caught the priest off guard, but he knew it was anger that made him speak. Father John took a breath, searching for his words.

"I am sorry. Frankly, it's unfair to you. I agree."

He paused.

"I had a certificate of good conduct written up for the director of the penitentiary center. To show your good faith."

"Obviously, they didn't appreciate your taking a surprise vacation" growled Chris Marshall.

Father John twitched lightly.

"It wasn't a vacation, Chris Marshall."

"And how do you call your "pilgrimage"?"

Father John should have been more present. He shouldn't have neglected his duties.

It was something he couldn't deny.

Perhaps if he had held office, his certificate would have had more weight.

"I'm fed up ! I'm tired of behaving like a choirboy!" yelled the inmate.

"Don't give up, Chris Marshall" Father John replied. "You have made all these efforts. Don't give up now."

"And why should I listen to you now?"

Father John bit his lip.

"... There will be other requests for parole. The next one will be good. We will prepare it together."

"Promises, promises."

There was a slight noise. Chris Marshall had straightened up.

"I want to see my family. I want to see my child, before he is 18 if possible."

"You'll see, Chris Marshall. But ... don't give up now. You are close to the goal."

Father John heard his cell phone ring. Normally, he would have ignored it. He would have stayed listening to Chris Marshall until the latter was fed up with his presence.

But ... a feeling invited him to respond. Father John apologized to the inmate and he picked up the phone, activating his voice command.

"Father John? It's Bumblebee. Could you join us at the base?"

Father John was surprised by the tone of the Autobot.

Something had happened ... he knew it.

"You came home, right?"

"Yes. Please come. We will open a ground-bridge for you."

Father John immediately thought of Wing.

He had to go ... he hung up and got up slowly from his chair.

"I've got to go. We'll continue next week, Chris Marshall. And this time, I will stay as long as you want."

But Chris Marshall didn't seem to believe it.

"Yeah. This is not how you will earn points, Father John."

"Excuse me?"

"The director of the penitentiary center is tired of your excuses. But go for it. If you feel it."

The priest's heart quickened in his chest.

He wanted to tell her that he blamed himself. That he didn't want to give him up. Neither he nor the others.

Unfortunately, he found nothing to answer. He ended up apologizing again before heading for the door to exit.

When he arrived at the base, accompanied by Starry, Father John felt a heavy atmosphere welcoming him. When he welcomed those who had left on a mission, he only got a vague dark return.

What had happened? They'd brought the artifact back?

Father John looked for Wing, called his name. But the latter did not answer him.

For a moment, Father John was afraid. He was afraid that Wing had not returned. Something had happened to him during his trip.

And the priest's heart sank violently at this thought.

It was Bumblebee who informed him. And what he heard saw the human on the spot.

"We failed to recover the Diamond. We haven't been efficient enough."

He took a while before completing.

"… Arkus has been destroyed."

"What?" Karan yelled in response, shocked.

Father John shuddered at this answer.

And he felt the same reaction in Arcee and Cliffjumper.

"Is that a joke?" added the female Cybertronian. "How ... Arkus ... they didn't destroy Arkus, right?"

"Yes," replied Bumblebee, a slow tone."We ... We tried to prevent them ... but ... taking the Diamond meant condemning Arkus to destruction. And ... we weren't fast enough."

A silence fell.

Father John's hands trembled, stroking Starry's head. He wanted to seek comfort, a reassuring presence. In any way. Even if he hadn't known Arkus, even if he had never heard of it until now ... the idea that such an artifact could have destroyed a City ... it was beyond what he could imagine.

"We didn't tell you because ... we preferred to announce it to you in person" justified Bumblebee.

"... And Wing? Rung?" asked Father John, his voice trembling.

"... Rung is in his room. As for Wing, he is outside. They needed to isolate themselves, I think" said Bumblebee sadly.

Arcee raised her voice in turn.

"They destroyed Arkus… a City… even Decepticons wouldn't fall as low."

"We'll have to tell it to Ultra Magnus. And Dai Atlas." Bumblebee agreed.

"Dai Atlas will tell us it's our fault anyway!" growled Arcee.

She made the ground tremble. Father John guessed that she was walking away. Apparently, she needed to endure the news.

Alone. Father John understood.

"... I ... I'm sure Dai Atlas will be understanding" stammered Outrigger.

"I hope so too" added Bumblebee.

It was not their fault.

No ... nobody could have done anything about it. Father John closed his eyes, Starry licking his hand as if to assure him that everything would be fine.

When Wing first mentioned the artifacts ... Father John hadn't realized how dangerous they actually were. He hadn't expected it to go that far. At least so far.

Father John gently pulled on Starry's leash. "Come on, boy," he whispered to him, trying to pick up on a composed tone.

He wasn't the one who needed comfort right now.

Wing had not moved. When Father John found himself outside, guided by Starry and calling him by name, he felt a brief, distant movement, without accompanying him with words. Father John instantly recognized the facial expressions of the Cybertronian.

The human approached slowly and carefully. Wing's presence only grew stronger. Father John ended up stopping Starry and the human seated on the ground near his friend.

He wanted to talk to Rung. He wanted to speak to Bumblebee. But the latter had advised him to do nothing. Let them manage in their own way. He hadn't had any bad intentions. Everyone had their own way of enduring similar news.

But ... he knew Wing needed to speak. He knew him well enough to know it.

"… I'm glad you're alive," said Father John after a silence.

He tried to smile. But he knew Wing didn't give it back. He heard a metallic noise. And Father John understood that the Cybertronian had looked away.

Was he ... ashamed? Father John stroked Starry's head. Then he spoke slowly.

"I enjoyed the concert of Yuma and Andrea. They plan to hold another soon. I think you would like their music. Mary loved it. Me too."

Wing was still silent.

"There was a song. A song in Spanish, titled Always Fighting" the human said, his tone sounding nostalgic at the memory.

"... I'm trying to fight" finally replied Wing, his voice dull and trembling.

The Cybertronian paused.

"I let the Crown of Solomus fall into their hands. I thought I could make up for it ... and instead they got the Diamond. And Arkus was destroyed. Because we couldn't protect it."

"It was beyond your skill, Wing."

Father John straightened up.

"You couldn't know what it was going to cause. You tried. You did your best."

"That's what I'm trying to convince myself of."

"We still have the Book of Epistemus, Wing. As long as we have it, the five artifacts will not be reunited."

He guessed that Wing had taken his face between his hands.

"Dai Atlas had warned us that the Diamond was one of the worst. With that of Mortilus ... but ... I'm afraid. I'm afraid to go. I'm afraid the same pattern will repeat itself. That another city be destroyed if we try to recover it."

Wing put his hands back on the floor.

"…I'm afraid. I ... I don't want to go through this anymore."

"So, don't go this time" Father John advised him softly.

"It would be cowardly. And that would be unworthy of a member of the Circle of Light. We are taught to be aware of our emotions so that we can postpone them after a fight. But ... there... I just can't do it" he added, his voice trembling.

Father John shifted to get closer to him. He couldn't judge him from being afraid.

"It's okay to be afraid. You have already approached the powers of three artifacts. And after a while, it's too much to bear. If you're afraid and don't want to go, no one will judge you."

Wing took a while to answer.

"... But ... If I don't go this time ... someone else will have to endure it. Someone else will have to endure their power."

The human guessed who he was talking about.

"Are you thinking of Outrigger?"

"I don't want him to go through the same ordeal. He's too young to ... see corpses or ... watch a city burn."

This did not surprise him. If Wing considered the latter to be a son, it was obvious that he would do everything to protect or preserve him from such a power.

It was the love of a parent who made him do this ...

"I understand" the human assured him tenderly. "But ... think of yourself, Wing. You, like Rung… have already endured a lot with the artifacts. And you cannot carry such a weight on your shoulders alone. Think about your health. That's all I ask of you"

Even if Wing acted like it shouldn't affect him ... Sooner or later, he would fall apart. And that was not what Father John wanted.

Silence fell again. Then Wing told him:

"It was because of me that they were able to take the Diamond of Adaptus."

"Wing ... Please ..."

The priest would not accept that he blamed himself.

No. He would not accept it.

"That is true. The Diamond was enclosed in a crystal. A crystal that opens to those with the purest feelings. I got too close. And ... the crystal opened."

Father John blinked.

"Did the artifact analyse your feelings?"

"Yes. I ... I was locked into an illusion, like the ones Dai Atlas mentioned. I saw Drift there. And ... I saw something there. Someone else."

The human remained silent, letting him continue.

"... I saw my daughter there. Heavenlight. Little Light."

Following this declaration, Father John remained silent for a long time. Surprise and shock crossed him and they were not emotions that needed words to express them.

Then he asked questions. Wing had never once mentioned that he had a daughter. Not since they had known each other. Father John wondered if this was a painful event that Wing had preferred to keep silent. But the Cybertronian shared the same emotions as humans. It could be heard by his voice.

"... I don't know. I don't know who this Heavenlight is. I didn't even know she existed until I was in the presence of the Diamond."

He took a breath.

"You must think I'm crazy. I ... I mean ... I don't see why I should have a daughter I don't even know."

No. The priest did not believe he was crazy.

Father John wondered if it was not an innate desire for a child on the part of Wing. But the Cybertronian seemed to guess his thoughts, since he added:

"I know she exists. I drew her once."

Father John remained silent, scratching the back of his head.

If the artifacts were not mistaken, to the point that the crystal had opened after judging Wing's feelings... There had to be a plausible explanation. Which would include the reason why Wing didn't remember.

"You ... have you ever been with someone ... whom you could have had a daughter with?" Father John asked him carefully.

He was embarrassed. He didn't know anything about Cybertronian reproduction. He didn't know it's the same as it's in humans ...

"Well ..." replied Wing after a while. "Besides Drift, no. Nobody else. But ... I would have known if he had carried them or if I had carried them. I would have felt the connection."

Father John nodded. So Cybertronians could reproduce with each other this way.

The human crossed his arms thoughtfully.

"... Wing. If you need to have answers, and I think it is the case... Maybe he should be the one to ask."

After all, they had been together. He guessed that Wing was curling up.

"But ... if I really had a daughter ... In the Circle of Light, the others would have known as well."

"Perhaps. But you said the artifact was not lying. So… surely there is something."

Father John raised his arm and sought Wing's contact.

He put his hand against the metal.

"Contact Drift, Wing. I think you will not regret it."

"But ... if I don't like the answer?"

"In this case, you will be fixed."

Silence again. Wing was thinking.

"… Will you stay with me? While I contact him?"

"…Of course."

If the answer was hard to hear ... Wing needed someone by his side to get through this.

Father John did not move. He didn't move when Wing started entering the coordinates to contact the person who would explain it to him.

Together they waited.

"... Drift. "

When the silhouette of the orange bot appeared on the hologram, Wing felt the words drown in his throat.

Drift's optics lit up.

"Wing! I am delighted to hear you. How are you?"

He was in his living room. In his apartment in Kaon. In the background, Fracture could be seen, leaning over something. He nodded to him before going back to his work.

Wing bit his lip. How to approach the subject? The subject of a daughter he didn't even know had existed?

He had taken out the brooch offered by Drift. But most of all, he had taken out Heavenlight's drawing.

He looked at him, feeling his spark again tender at the sight of this little Cybertronian who was smiling.

"I…"

He turned his attention back to Father John, hesitating to continue.

The man smiled and reached out to touch his ankle, as if to reassure him that he would not leave him.

Wing gulped.

"... I ... I need to talk to you, Drift."

Drift nodded.

"Of course. What about?"

"About Heavenlight."

Then Drift's smile disappeared.

The light in his optics went out.

Silence fell. The orange bot looked down. And the apprehension in Wing's spark only got stronger.

"…I see."

In the background, Fracture had left his work to get closer to Drift.

Wing took a while before showing the drawing of Heavenlight in front of the screen.

"You placed this drawing in this brooch so that I fell on it, huh?"

Drift did not respond immediately.

But when he did react, it was to say yes.

"... You ... you know Heavenlight? Do you know who she was?"

He saw Drift tense. Fracture put his hand on his.

"Drift ... I think you should tell him. The subject is launched, anyway. You knew it would happen."

His former pupil closed the optics.

Wing had previously observed Drift in stressful situations. But not to such an extent. As Father John was currently doing for him, Fracture offered a reassuring presence to Drift.

Wing decided to ask frankly. He had to know it.

"… Do we have a daughter together?"

A sister for Jetstorm, Slipstream, Night…

His daughter… his and Drift's?

"…No. You had a daughter, Wing."

"I had a daughter ..."

Why didn't he say "I have a daughter"?

Drift took a breath before continuing.

"It dates from the time when I had just joined the Circle of Light. You went on a mission to Kaon to visit Gasket. It was during the war."

He paused.

"You ... found a little orphan Cybertronian in the street. An Insecticon. She lived in the slums. She was a little girl who had just been created. She was hungry and in bad shape. You looked after her, you fed her. You made contact… and quickly, you developed bonds. You two"

Bonds…

Wing did not understand.

"But ... I don't remember going to Kaon."

"You stayed there for five years. You were going back and forth between the Crystal Cities and Kaon to see her. Dai Atlas did not want you to bring Heavenlight back to the Crystal Cities. So, you decided to raise her in Kaon as much as you could."

"Little Light ..."

"... I called her "Little Light", huh?"

"Yes. It was her nickname. And ... after a while together, she ended up calling you daddy."

Wing shuddered at the thought.

When Wing had asked Dai Atlas for an explanation ... he'd said that didn't mean anything to him.

He had lied ...? He had known and lied to him...?

"When you were at the Crystal Cities, Gasket took care of her. When we were together, you only talked about her. I've never seen you so happy, so fulfilled."

Drift tried a smile that Wing didn't give back.

Gasket too ... Gasket had also hidden the truth from him.

"I met her once. And I understood why you were so attached to her. You considered her your daughter. And ... we told ourselves that we would raise her together, that we would be a family. At the Crystal Cities or elsewhere… We had started to gather Shanix together. Kaon had just been released from the Autobot occupation. You took an apartment for her and Gasket, so that they could have a more comfortable life until we find a solution about Dai Atlas. To convince him to let Heavenlight come to the Crystal Cities."

Their daughter… Their daughter they could have had ...?

Wing felt his servos shake without being able to control anything.

"... Drift."

"... Yes, Wing?"

This question ... this question ...

"... Why don't I remember Heavenlight? If ... if she was so important to me ..."

Yes. Why?

"... What happened to her?"

Little Light… Again, his spark was screaming.

But Wing did not feel.

"… One day, you decided to speak to Dai Atlas. You went to the Crystal Cities to give him an ultimatum. Either you came back with Heavenlight, or you never came back. You left Heavenlight with Gasket. The Decepticons wanted to take over Kaon."

Then, the aftermath struck him.

"... A bombing hit the building where they were ... and it collapsed. Heavenlight was inside."

Daddy…daddy…

It was as if Wing heard his daughter's calls.

This daughter who was previously unknown to him ...

"Gasket tried to save her ... he did everything he could, Wing. But ... that was not enough."

Wing felt his jaw clench, enduring the news of Drift.

Father John also listened. He kept his hand on his ankle.

"You never got over it. You ... you weren't eating anymore. You were no longer recharging. You ... you were in so much pain. You wanted to see her again when it was impossible. It was impossible to give Heavenlight back..."

"I had a daughter"

"... Dai Atlas thought that ... to save you all this suffering ... it was better to erase your data. All your memories on Heavenlight…"

Again, another blow.

Wing stared at Drift, an empty optic.

The orange bot swallowed. Fracture kept the orange bot's hand in his.

"I wanted to tell you ... for a long time. It was ... the real reason why Gasket didn't want you to come back to Cybertron. He didn't want ... those memories to come back. He didn't want you to suffer again."

"... I'm not in pain, Drift."

This time, Wing smiled.

He smiled when he had just learned that he had lost a daughter ...

But …

"… I should be suffering but I don't remember. I do not remember the pain I felt."

Even if he should ...

"... I don't remember Heavenlight. Quite simply. How could I suffer if I don't remember?"