Restless Waters
Alahana Stelak's body lay on a travois, secured with vines from ka'shanto trees. The trees' large, violet and white flowers contrasted starkly against her frailness, their vibrant colors and still-living blooms mocking the ashen tone death brought to her scales. Yet they did a fair job of concealing the odors of decay. Thane's earliest memories of the woman, when she was still young and robust, superimposed themselves over the corpse before him, creating a dizzying sense of dysphoria. Kepral's Syndrome was most certainly not a kind death, and he felt ashamed of himself for ever having thought to allow the disease to claim him without regard for what it would do to his son.
"They are ready for us," Rah'kira said, drawing Thane away from his musings.
Dipping his head in acknowledgement, Thane crouched next to the travois along with Rah'kira and several other drell assigned the task of carrying Alahana to the beach. Two of the men he easily recognized, having grown up beside them, honing their bodies into instruments of death. Neither Tinaki nor Jia seemed particularly concerned about Thane's presence one way or the other. It might be nice to spend some time with them, if they permitted, to learn how they were doing. Undoubtedly, he would see many others from his time in the Compact, and he suspected quite a few would not be pleased to see him there.
Pulling his battle sleep tighter around himself, he slid his hand through the opening in the travois meant to act as a handle. At Rah'kira's command, everyone lifted Alahana from the temple's stone floor. None spoke as they made their way through the doors and down the stairs, following the path leading from the temple to the shore. Rain pelted his scales and soaked through the shemagh covering his nose and mouth, almost making the protective cloth pointless.
They stopped once they reached the sand of the beaches, and the procession formally began. A high priestess stood opposite them, out just beyond the tide's lapping waves. Forming lines on either side of the high priestess, Alahana's loved ones waited and watched. Those who'd attended to show their support to the living stood in clusters further away. They would move between the two rows of honored guests to offer their condolences after Alahana was given to the sea. Thane fought the urge to seek out Jasmine and Theodus in the crowd to assure himself they hadn't abandoned him in his time of need, as he said goodbye to his den mother.
As he had Kolyat, while the child said goodbye to his own mother.
The high priestess turned, facing the restless waters, and called out to Kalahira. The goddess' name was nearly lost to the brewing storm, the winds ripping the word from the high priestess' mouth. Perhaps they'd carry it all the way across the sea.
As one, Thane and the others took a single, long stride toward the shore. Solemn in their silence, they stopped and waited once more. When they heard Kalahira's name cried out once again, they moved forward. Little by little, on the heels of each desperate plea made to the goddess of oceans and the afterlife, they carried Thane's den mother to the edge of the sea.
The high priestess turned back around, gaze steady on Alahan's body before she bowed her head in prayer. Following her lead, everyone present did the same. He allowed her hushed words to wash over him, feeding as much as easing the heartache struggling to rip his battle sleep to shreds. Quiet, strangled sobs came from somewhere on his left, but he kept his eyes closed, giving the mourner their privacy.
When the prayer ended, the high priestess stepped out of the way, waving an arm out at the ocean. "Kalahira, we entrust our sister to your open arms. She is yours now as she has always been."
Thane and the others carried the travois out into the water; first the waves lapped at his boots, then his calves, and eventually his thighs. They stopped when the water reached Rah'kira's waist. The travois bobbed gently on the water, Kalahria sweeping Alahana into her arms. Thane knew he must let go of the travois, but a part of him refused. Battle sleep failing him, tears he'd fought back since his shuttle landed on Kahje suddenly overwhelmed him.
"It is time to say goodbye, my love," Irikah's voice whispered on the wind.
Taking a deep, shuddering breath, Thane released the travois.
Having collected himself while the guests offered everyone their sympathies, Thane remained standing off to the side. Hands tucked behind his back, he discreetly studied the profile of a woman who'd succumbed to her grief. She'd collapsed to her knees in the sand, wailing and clutching something to her chest as she watched Alahana drift out to sea. A man crouched next to her, an arm stretched out behind her back with his hand resting on her shoulder. He bowed his head, pressing his brow against her arm.
Thane saw the familial resemblance in the woman's features.
She was Alahana's daughter.
Sahnira's mother.
"She does not know, nor would Alahana wish for her to ever learn, that Sahnira's death was contracted by Alahana herself." Rah'kira came to a stop next to Thane, gaze fixed on the travois, nothing but a speck on the water.
Thane lowered his gaze to his boots, utterly unsurprised Rah'kira would know where his mind had drifted. "I do not wish for her to know, either."
Shame filled his aching chest, even though he didn't regret taking the contract. Still, he felt responsible for a part of what drove the woman kneeling in the sand to such maddening grief. In such a short time, she'd lost both a daughter and a mother. Even if Alahana said she was never very close to La'ade or Sahnira, La'ade's pain must be unbearable.
The storm hit, the rain shifting into a deluge. Without another word, Thane and Rah'kira turned as one and headed into the tree line. Theodus and Jasmine stood next to the path, watching their approach. Before stepping foot on the island, Theodus hid himself with a hooded jacket and a shemagh, though anyone who caught sight of his red ocular scales would know right away of his affliction. Yet, if it made his cousin more comfortable while being surrounded by drell, Thane would keep it to himself.
"Do you care to meet her?" Thane asked, glancing at his mentor. He didn't see any reason not to introduce Rah'kira to Jasmine, after all, the man likely already learned all there was to find about the woman Thane loved.
Rah'kira looked at Thane in silence for a moment before giving him a brief nod. "Indeed," he said, turning his gaze to Jasmine and Theodus, "I believe I do."
Although neither of them would ever admit it, Alahana had managed to bring Thane and Rah'kira back together again, helped to heal old wounds even while creating new ones. Despite himself, Thane felt eager to please Rah'kira and nervous about how his mentor would interact with those he loved. Afterall, he'd abandoned Alahana, Rah'kira, and the Compact to chase after love, and it'd created a deep fissure in their relationship.
Jasmine's warm, compassionate smile put a little steel back into Thane's spine as he stopped and held a hand out to her. Sliding her palm into his, she allowed him to guide her forward and stepped easily into his embrace. He pressed his forehead to hers, breathing in her rain-soaked scent and using it to center himself.
After a moment, he turned, lowering one had to her hip to tug her in closer as he gestured at Rah'kira with the other. "Jasmine, I'd like for you to meet my mentor, Rah'kira. He was responsible for much of my training while I was in the Compact."
Instead of extending her hand, Jasmine dipped her head to Rah'kira in the drell fashion, and the gesture relaxed Thane a little more. "It's a pleasure to meet you," she said.
Rah'kira, however, did extend his hand—much to Thane's surprise—and Jasmine shook it with a smile on her face. "It is an honor to meet you, and you have my thanks for being here today. Nara Stelak undoubtedly found joy in knowing Krios will not be alone in his time of grief."
Turning her head to smile at Thane, she shifted in a little closer to his side before returning her attention to Rah'kira. "I'm honored to have been here. I know she meant a lot to him … to you both."
"Indeed." Rah'kira gave her a brief smile, a true rarity.
"Allow me to also introduce my cousin, Theodus." Thane waved Theodus closer despite his attempts to remain unnoticed.
Rah'kira turned his head in acknowledgement. His brow ridge ticked up ever so slightly, it was barely noticeable as he watched Theodus shuffle closer. "Haset's child … interesting."
Theodus nearly stumbled, coming to such an abrupt stop.
"Though I recall he named you Rokat." If the sudden tension in the air bothered Rah'kira, he said nothing of it. Instead, he dipped his head, tucking his hands behind his back once more. "I am pleased to make your acquaintance."
Jasmine slid out of Thane's grasp and moved closer to Theodus, pressing her hand between his shoulder blades in a silent show of support as she guided him closer. "I believe he prefers Theodus, though I often call him Theo."
"I see." Rah'kira tipped his head in concession. "I meant no offense."
"None taken," Theodus managed after a second or two, his voice crackling with his distress. "You know my father? I—my apologies, it has been many years since I have spent any time among our people. I am surprised to learn you know who I am."
"As am I," Thane said, looking between the two men. "I only recently learned I had a cousin at all."
Rah'kira let out a raspy chuckle, gaze drifting back to Thane. "It seems I will always know more than you anticipate." He waved a hand at Theodus but kept his gaze on Thane. "Given how well you took to your training, Alahana kept track of your family, she wished to see if your kin might do as well. When … Theodus was of age, I visited with Haset and Ishita to determine if he might be a good fit for our faction." Looking back at Theodus, he tipped his head to the side. "Regrettably, they had already decided they would not relinquish you in honor of the Compact. They did not wish for us to even meet, though I caught a glimpse of you as I was leaving."
Even though he'd called ahead to reschedule his treatments when he received word of Alahana's passing, he still wasn't due to check into the hospital for a couple of days. After spending hours outside of the domed city, however, Jasmine had gently urged him to go ahead and get the physical exam out of the way if nothing else. Theodus backed her play, but she had a feeling it was more about his own need to retreat to the motel and hide for the night before meeting anyone else new. Thankfully, Thane hadn't put up much of a fight, because after the initial scans, his doctor thought it best to start his treatments right away to clear the fluid from his lungs.
Jasmine stood in the entrance to his hospital room. She wanted to stay well out of the way of the doctor busy doing her job to make Thane better. Feeling eyes on her, she glanced over her shoulder and smiled when she spotted Rone and Kolyat approaching.
"Christ, you got taller!" She grinned, shaking her head at Kolyat when he came close enough to hear her. "Look at you!"
"Jasmine," he said, embarrassment coloring the chastising tone. He returned her smile, though. "It is good to see you again."
"You, too." She turned her attention to Rone when Kolyat slipped past her to go greet his dad. "Hello, Rone. How are you?"
"I am well, thank you." Rone moved to stand at her side, watching over Kolyat and Thane. "I hope you are well, also."
"I am, yeah." As she said it, she realized it was the truth. She was well, doing far better than she had in months.
He glanced down at her and gave her a soft smile. "This pleases me to hear. Kelena sends her regards. I am afraid she tires easily these days."
Not entirely certain if it'd be rude to ask—well, ruder than asking anything—Jasmine hesitated, considering her choice of words before she stated, "I hope her pregnancy is going smoothly." She held her breath, awaiting his response.
Something about his smile told her she didn't get it quite right, but he appreciated her efforts. Dipping his head, he said, "Much to both of our relief, her doctors have reported nothing of concern."
"Oh good," she said, shoulders relaxing as she exhaled, "I'm so happy to hear that."
He let out a soft, endearing chuckle. "Kelena will be pleased to know that you have been thinking of our child's wellbeing." Glancing over at Thane and Kolyat before lowering his voice, he changed the subject and said, "It concerned me to learn my brother was to receive a treatment tonight."
"Oh." Jasmine shook her head, hoping to put him at ease. "He spent so much time outside at the funeral, I pushed him to go ahead and come in. There's nothing wrong, the doctor just wanted to give him a hand at clearing his lungs from the day's humidity and rain."
"Ah." Visibly relaxing, Rone nodded. "A wise precaution. I am glad he has you to ensure he takes care of himself."
"Jasmine?" Kolyat called out to her, lifting his voice just enough to ensure she'd heard him.
"What's up?" She moved away from the door frame and walked over to stand next to him, resting her hip against the edge of Thane's hospital bed.
"Father said he did not think to tell you, yet." Kolyat beamed at her as he spoke, something hopeful and hungry in his blue eyes. "My instructors have informed me that by the end of the school year, my marks will be on track for secondary."
Grinning, she put a hand on his shoulder and gave it a little squeeze, noting that her making physical contact didn't seem to phase him anymore. "Congratulations! I knew you could do it!"
"Thank you." The praise sparked a fire in his eyes, and his smile widened. "I thought you would like to know." Then, as if in afterthought, he said, "Yours and Father's encouragement has been very motivating to me."
Alone in their motel room, Thane became unglued, strangled keens grating through his throat as tears flooded his eyes. Jasmine took him by the hand and led him over to the bed before helping him remove his clothing. She took his face in her hands, brushing tears from his cheeks with her thumbs. She knew he'd been holding back his pain, and as much as it broke her heart to see him so deeply wounded, it meant the world to her that he chose to share it with her just then.
"I'm so sorry, Thane," she whispered, pulling him into her embrace.
He said nothing, just clung to her and sobbed against her shoulder. She held him for a few moments, caressing the scales on the back of his head and neck. It wasn't fair. First, she'd lost Karin, and now he'd lost Alahana. When would they be allowed to live their lives in peace? It just wasn't fair.
"Come on," she said, urging him upright. "You need to get some rest. You've barely slept in God-only-knows how long."
He let her ease out of his grasp, and she pulled the covers back. Returning to his side, she guided him to the bed, and he sat on the edge. Shoulders shaking, he pressed his palm to the center of his chest and rubbed.
"Does your chest hurt?" She knew the breathing treatments could be hard on him.
He nodded, looking up to meet her gaze. His voice cracked as he took her hand. "Will you stay and lie down with me, siha?"
"Of course." She'd already planned on it. "I'll be right here beside you the whole time, I'm not going anywhere." Squeezing his hand, she slipped her fingers free and nudged his shoulders. "Go ahead and lay down, and I'll get undressed."
He did as she said, lying back against the pillows and tugging the blankets up over his waist. He watched her, tears still slipping from his eyes, hand still kneading his sternum, as she stepped back and lifted her shirt over her head. "I am so grateful to you for joining me here. I know it was sooner than planned, and I hope it didn't cause any problems between you and Isaac."
She tossed her shirt on the ground and unsnapped her bra. "Thane, there wasn't any way in hell I wasn't coming with you, you'd just lost someone you loved. And Isaac understands. He'd planned on waiting until we returned before hitting the next Cerberus' place either way."
"Indeed?" A hint of hope colored the question.
Undoing her pants, she pushed them and her panties down her thighs and sat next to him on the bed to kick off her boots. "Yeah. We were just going to see if we could find Subject Zero, see what intel she might have until it was time for us to come here." Wriggling her pants the rest of the way off, she turned and pressed her knees to the mattress. "And that isn't anything we have to rush, either. So, don't worry about any of it," she said, climbing over him and crawling under the covers. "It's not important right now."
"As you wish." He took a deep breath, wiping the wetness from his cheeks. The tears had stopped flowing, but she wouldn't be surprised if they started right back up again.
Holding her arm out, voice soft and affectionate, she said, "Come here, let me hold you."
He rolled to his side and slid closer, curling himself around her body and resting his head on her shoulder. A moment later, tears, cold and wet, dropped to her skin. She tightened her grip on him, wishing she could take it all away from him. She'd give anything just then, anything, to ease his pain. All she could really do, though, was hold him close and let him cry, and so she did.