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Chapter 40

Tris P.O.V

"Move in with me," Tobias blurts out. Although this morning has been nothing but perfect, I could tell that Tobias had been lost in his own thoughts. I just assumed he was apprehensive about his upcoming re-evaluation this afternoon. Why wouldn't he be? Tobias loves his work, loves being able to help those in need. I can't imagine what he would do if he wasn't able to do what he does. Did he really just ask me...

I stare in shock as my spoonful of eggs falls on my plate below, sending some of its contents airborne. Did I hear him right? Maybe he was joking, maybe I'm hearing things? I stare at him, waiting for any hint that what I just heard was wrong, or if what he just said was meant as a joke, but all I see are his eyes staring back at me in a pleading way, like he wants me to say "yes."Shit, I don't know what to say…

"Wha… what did you just say?" I need to make sure I'm hearing this right.

He puts his coffee mug down off to the side, as he leans on his elbows on the kitchen island, he then pushes my plate, and coffee to the side too, taking both my hands in his. "Move in with me Tris," he repeats.

"Why?" The word leaves my mouth before I can stop it.

"Yesterday, when you left...I was a mess. I hated that we were separated, it just didn't feel right to me. I knew that eventually it would happen, but I never thought it would feel the way it did. Tris, I don't want to be apart from you," he continues. "Tris... I love you. I know there is nothing more I want than to wake up next to you every morning, and to go to bed with you every night." I can see all the love and compassion that he feels for me in his ocean blue eyes.

"But Tobias, we haven't been together that long," I whisper my silly concern. I instantly see the disappointment in his eyes. I hate that I'm the one that put it there.

"Tris, every relationship is different. There are no rules, no handbook to follow, it's what we feel is right for us. Do you really feel it's too early, or do you think you should feel like it's too early?" He asks. Wow, I am taken aback at how much he truly does know me. Because in reality, it would be too early for us to move in together, but with how strong we feel for one another, I would say, "how soon can we pack my bags."

So, I take a moment to really think about what I want. Do I want to live with Tobias? Am I ready for that next step? I hated being separated from him too. I mean, it did feel wrong, like the possibility of an end was approaching. Yet, I knew there was no reason to feel that way, because he had his own place, and I had mine too. I know many couples live apart for awhile until they reach that next step. Could it be that we are already there? Have we somehow skipped some of these steps, and now we have reached this one, that much faster?

I see Tobias' eyes begin to lose hope, as I take my time thinking my answer through, thoroughly. I raise my index finger, signaling for him to give me another minute. He nods, giving me a chance to think. Yesterday really took me for an emotional roller coaster. I hated all the hurt and the grief that I was feeling, and knowing that Tobias was feeling the same way, made it that much worse. I know one thing for sure, after last night I don't want to spend another night away from him. But my apartment lease still has another five months left on it, and I'm afraid that getting out of it too soon would cost me a fortune. But is that the only thing stopping me? If I didn't have this lease hanging over my head, would I say yes to him right away?

"My lease doesn't end for another five months," I say, voicing the only concern I truly can come up with.

"So does that mean…" he begins to say slowly, as if he's not sure of where I am going with my answer. "Is that the only thing keeping you here… or is that your excuse not to move in with me?" He asks. What is with the brain teasers? I can see the hope, and the fear in his eyes at the same time.

"I mean that.. If I try to get out now, it would really cost me a fortune," I answer.

"What about subletting the apartment?" He suggests. Well that's an idea. "We can sublet it for now… with the furniture even."

"Do you think that would work?" I ask, my mind still spinning. I suppose it's not a bad idea… if all else fails I can always return back home when the sublet's agreement has expired. It could be like a trial run for the both of us.

"Does that mean you're thinking about it?" Tobias says, with the biggest grin on his face, he's so adorable.

"There isn't anything to think about, Tobias. Of course I want nothing more than to be with you, to spend every night sleeping in your arms," I say, my grin matching his own. He gets up off the bar stool and walks around the island, heading towards me with that infectious grin never leaving his gorgeous face. He then wraps his arms around my waist, pulling me close to his body, lifting my feet slightly off the ground. Tobias doing little things like lifting me off the ground when he holds me, make me giddy like a schoolgirl sometimes. I can't help the giggle that tries to escape my mouth.

"I love it when you giggle like that. It reminds me of a schoolgirl."Tobias says, looking down at me. There he goes, reading my mind again. I swear he knows me better than I know myself sometimes.

Tobias and I have been talking back and forth via text messages all day. After Tobias and I spoke this morning, we agreed that until my apartment is sublet, we would alternate between both our places. We can't stand the thought of being apart from each other, not after the heartache we went through yesterday. We have both come to realize that after being together intimately our connection is even stronger than before, and quite frankly it's just too damn painful to be apart from one another. I've already started to post ads on multiple social media sites, as well as my bulletin board that is hung in the lobby of my building. While packing an overnight bag to go to Tobias' tonight my phone suddenly beeps, signaling that I have another text, I can't help the goofy grin that is plastered on my face when I see it's from Tobias.

Tobias- I passed with flying colors! I report back to work Wednesday.

Tris- Congratulations! I knew you could do it. We should celebrate tonight!

Tobias- I can think of a few ways I would love to celebrate :)

Tris- Seriously Tobias, we just had sex last night, and again this morning. Haven't you had enough?

I am beyond thankful that I'm alone in my office right now. I know my face must be the color of a tomato right now.

Tobias- Enough of you? Never! I told you that you're addicting. I can never get enough of you!

Tris- I'll see you tonight, but first I have to swing by my place for some fresh clothes.

Tobias- Sounds like a plan. I'll get some take-out on my way home.

Tris- Sounds good! Can't wait to see you. Love you.

Tobias- I love you too. Drive safe.

I push the home screen button on my phone while noticing that I have butterflies in my stomach, as I often do when it comes to Tobias. This morning's conversation continues to replay in my head… I still can't believe that I said yes to moving in with him. It was then that I realized how strong my feelings truly ran for him, I know I am in deep… deeper than I ever expected to be. I spend most of the day wishing for the hands of time to move faster, so I can get home to the man I love. Oh man, I'm in so deep! I'm such a lovesick fool.

"Welcome home." Tobias greets me at the door, he then takes my overnight bag from my hands, along with my purse, always the gentleman. He leans in giving me a tender kiss, before placing my things into his bedroom...our bedroom, as I take my shoes and jacket off.

My afternoon was filled with an indecisive bride, and her very opinionated mother. Although the opinion and support is always welcome from the mother of the bride, it's not always the easiest, or the best over all to deal with. The bride herself wanted nothing more than to please her mother, but she was losing the vision that she wanted for her own wedding day. Overall it made things more complicated to find some kind of middle ground for every item on the checklist.

"Long day?" Tobias asks, wrapping his arms around my waist and pulling my back into his chest. I didn't even hear him coming up behind me.

"It's better now," I answer, turning around to face him, while wrapping my arms around his neck. This is what I have wanted all day long, to be right here in his strong arms, locked away from the crazy world.

"Is it now?" He teases, leaning down and placing open mouth kisses all the way down my neck. I feel his wet tongue grazing the skin there, and every stroke of the tip of his tongue sends shocks of electricity rushing through me. I suddenly feel wetness starting to pool between my legs, as it begins to dampen my panties. I let out an involuntary moan, as my hands tangle into his hair keeping him in place. His hands leave my waist, as they begin to explore both my ass and breasts. He pushes me backwards, pinning me against the wall with his body flushed up against mine. My body boils in anticipation of wondering what he has in store for me. I drag in a lung full of air into my aching lungs, knowing all I want is more of him, all I know is I need him now. I feel as though I might combust at any minute, with the right touch. Suddenly Tobias moves his hands to join my own that are still tangled in his hair, wrapping his fingers around mine. He gently pulls my hands from their place in his hair. In one swift motion, he grabs both of my hands with just one of his own, and raises them above my head pinning me even more firmly against the wall. I swear my panties are done for the rest of the day, as my entrance is dripping with want for him. He spreads my legs with one of his, stepping between my thighs and bending his knees so we are at the same level, he presses his hardened length against the junction between my legs. I start to moan feeling the sweet assault, when he begins to grind hard against me creating both delicious pleasure and torture at the same time. "Is this making it better now, baby?" He says, panting between his words. Holy fuck! Tobias moves his empty hand slowly down the center of my body, passing my breasts, down to my stomach, and then puts his hand between my thighs, creating even more delicious friction than before as his fingers find there way to my clit over my panties. I moan loudly, it's this moment that I am so thankful that I decided to wear a skirt today. "Mm. I can feel how much you want me. Your panties are soaked." He says, his voice filled with hunger. God, how I wish he would finally slip them off of me so badly. To no longer have them be a barrier between us, to have him slip his big hard dick deep inside of me.

Tobias," I moan again, ready to plead for him.

"What do you want, Tris? Tell me." He demands, but he doesn't wait for me to answer, instead he crushes his lips against mine, stroking my lips with his tongue. I want to scream out loud that I want him...I want him buried so deep inside me until it hurts, I want him to make me cum all around his dick.

The sound of my ringtone on my phone suddenly separates us. I groan as Tobias pulls away, leaving me breathless. I want to yell no, just ignore it, that they will call back, but it's too late, he has already stopped. I hear him mumble the words, "damn fucking interruptions." I bite my bottom lip to stop myself from laughing at him. His hand then snakes into the side pocket of my flared skirt, pulling my phone out for me. "I'll get you later," he teases me with his mischievous smile. I know that later he will make sure that he takes care of me, but I don't want to wait till then, I think to myself, with a pout on my face. I take the damn phone from his hands, looking down at it, but I don't recognize the number... This better be good!

"Hello," I answer.

"Hi, my name is Cara, I'm calling regarding the ad for the sublet one bedroom apartment." The female voice answers.

It's been a week since I met with Cara. The next day after she called me, we made arrangements to meet at my apartment for a showing, and to talk. Being over protective of me, Tobias had insisted that he be present when we first meet, just in case. Just one more thing to love about that man.

Cara was pleased with the apartment, and all the terms of the lease, along with the price that I had it listed for. Tobias and I both talked about it previously, yes we could of up charged for the apartment, after all it's hard to find an 800 square feet apartment for the price of fifteen hundred dollars a month. In this current market, I should have been listing it at the bare minimum of nineteen hundred. She also agreed to me running a background check, and checking her references, and her employment history. I was pleased with what we found, no criminal history, she was employed at the same company for five years, and all her references panned out. She was the perfect tenant. The only drawback was she only needed the apartment for three months, as she was just passing through Chicago on an assignment and wouldn't be needing the apartment for longer than that. Which would leave two months in limbo for Tobias and I to figure out later. But be as it may, she was perfect. We agreed to signing the lease for three months as is, with the furniture and all. She and I agreed that I would return the next day to collect my things, such as clothes and personal items from the apartment and she would be here to collect the keys and provide me with the three months rent.

"So what can I do to help out?" Tobias asks after building a few boxes for me to begin to fill. I stop looking around the room. I run through the list of items that are being left behind for Cara, pillows, sheets, comforter, towels… the everyday essentials are not to be packed. Along with everything in the kitchen will be staying.

"My closet," I answer, nodding my head towards the sliding mirror door. He nods, grabbing a box and then begins to fill it with my handbags, and shoes. I turn grabbing another box, and begin filling it with the contents of my dresser drawers.

My thoughts begin to drift off to the contents of my underwear drawer. I wonder if Tobias would ever want me to wear anything special for him. Sex with Tobias is like nothing I could have ever imagined. Not only is it spiritual, and extremely physical, but he is so inventive and spontaneous as well, I know with him sex will never be dull. I remember some of the past conversations between me and Shauna when we would go shopping.

Flash back

"Seriously, Shauna?" I ask, I can't help looking around the store feeling like we were somehow committing a crime. She looks up, amused at the expression on my face.

"It's just lingerie, Tris," Shauna mumbles, I can tell she is trying to stop herself from laughing at me, but she is finding it difficult to do so. She has her hands on a black lacy nightie, that wouldn't leave much to the imagination, heck, why even bother wearing the thing, you can see everything. I swear my face can't gets any redder, the world might have a new color on their hands. "You mean to tell me, you never thought about buying something nice for Eric?" She asks.

"Shh," I shush her, looking around again hoping no one heard her.

"What?" She asks, whispering again, leaning in.

"People will hear you," I say, completely embarrassed.

"Tris, I hate to break it to you but… everyone has sex. It's nothing new, trust me." For her it's not, but for me... "Wait! Haven't you two…?" She begins to ask, but doesn't need to finish. I shake my head no, I'm only eighteen for crying out loud. It's not something I'm ready to do right now. Luckily for me, Eric knows and respects this, he is willing to wait until I'm ready. It's one of the many things I appreciate about him, he doesn't rush me, and is always patient. I know Eric isn't a virgin, because we have no secrets between each other. It makes me appreciate him even more, because he understands that I need more time, and he's willing to give it to me.

"Oh, I just assumed. I mean...you two are always touching and kissing, and well, it's no secret that Eric has gotten with his fair share of girls…"She continues mindlessly rambling."

"I know all about the girls, Shauna, and yes we have done a few things, but nothing too serious. I'm not ready, and he knows that and respects it. I'm sure that when the time comes I won't need to wrap myself up in lace, and hand myself to him like I'm a present," I say, making light of the situation.

"It's not like that,Tris. The lace, the outfit… it can make you feel sexy, and even more horny than you thought possible, and he will appreciate it too." She tries to explain, but is failing miserably. She shakes her head, knowing that her explanation has done nothing for my resolve. "One day, you'll see." I doubt it, with disappointment.

Flash back Ends

"Tris, I'm going to start putting the boxes at the front entrance," Tobias says from behind me, I look over my shoulder seeing him carrying out two boxes at a time. Wow, he works fast, I think to myself, as I get back to work filling the boxes with the contents of my drawers.

"Anything else?" Tobias asks, looking around, making sure we didn't leave any pictures, or personal items out. My eyes land on the wall by the front door, my heart sinks into my stomach eyeing the items that are hung there. For a moment I am uncertain of what to do with these items. I eye the folded flag that sits in it's frame, along with the photos of Eric and I over the years. I'm so thankful that Tobias and I were able to save a few of the pictures when my apartment was broken into back when I was attacked. Then my eyes land on the new frame that not only has the picture of the cherished moment of our engagement, but also has my ring in it. I ponder for a moment about what to do with them. Is it right for me to keep all of this? Is it fair to Tobias? But would it be fair to Eric to just get rid of them? I feel so torn with not knowing what to do... but I can't throw away my past, I loved him too. But I don't want to disregard Tobias' feelings either.

"I'll get some tissue paper," Tobias says, he must have already knew where my thoughts were going.

"Tobias…" I begin to say, when he starts to pull the first frame off of the wall, and then carefully wraps it up, and places it into the box with such care.

"Hey, look at me," Tobias says, standing up, cupping my face between his hands. "I know you love me, Tris. But I also know that Eric was your first love. He will always have a place in your heart and in your life." Tobias leans in, resting our foreheads together. "Baby, you wouldn't be the person you are today, if you didn't go through everything you did with him. He holds your past, but I'm your future Tris. I am man enough to admit that," he says, leaning further into me giving me a tender kiss, I can always feel the love in his heart that he has for me. I know now that Tobias must be very secure in our relationship for him to feel this way, not all men would. It makes me so happy to know that he believes in our love as much as I do.

"I love you," I say looking into his gorgeous eyes.

"I love you too, Tris."

"Alright… I think we got it all," Tobias says, bringing in the last item into his house. For now we agreed to placing my boxes into the guest bedroom, a.k.a my old room, until we can unpack them. I stand in the middle of the room, looking at the piles of boxes that surround me. It's so weird how one person's life can fit into such a small room, and placed into just these boxes. "Hey, what's this?" Tobias asks, his voice filled with curiosity. I turn to look at what has caught his attention. I'm sure that I don't own anything that interesting… my eyes follow his gaze towards the dark wooden trunk. The trunk that I forgot about up until now, with everything that had been going on in our lives these last few months. The trunk that I have so many questions about, because of all the mysterious stories that are being held within it. I look up seeing an odd expression on Tobias face, as though he recognizes the trunk somehow, as his right hand slowly caresses the wood markings. But how could he? When would he have seen it?

A/N

Stay tuned for the next update: February1st

This chapter was brainstormed with FDFobsessed

Like always, happy reading everyone!

Trini