Uneasy
"How much time would I be facing if… if the shit hits the fan." Thea shrugged, sitting at her kitchen table with Hilary the next morning with Dominic.
"Thea." Dominic shook his head.
"Look, I gotta know. I'm not going into this blind." Thea said.
"First degree murder?" Hilary questioned as Thea nodded, "Twenty-five to life." She said as Dominic placed his hands over his face.
"Why are we even talking about it? It's not gonna happen." Dominic said as Thea looked at Hilary.
"He's right." Hilary nodded, "There's no way. With the circumstances around the murder. Given this man was a rapist who had just been released from prison. You weren't safe with him anywhere near you. Self-defence doesn't just have to mean… defending yourself from a physical attack." She said, "He came into your home. Your back was already up against the wall. Your son was in the house." She said, "All of these things will help you. Over my dead body will you be given any sentence, never mind a life sentence." Hilary said as Thea just nodded slowly.
"But it… it could happen." Thea thought to herself. It was hard to imagine what that would be like. Spending the majority of her adult life in a prison cell. Not getting to see her son grow up. She couldn't imagine it.
"It won't." Hilary nodded, "I've worked on cases like this before. Girls who have murdered their abusive boyfriends. I get them walking away jail free with some counselling."
"Yeah I'm no stranger to counselling don't worry." Thea nodded.
"My job is to work with you and build a case so that, if it goes to trial, the jury agrees with what you did. Given what has happened, it's not gonna be hard." Hilary said as Thea nodded, "Would your sister be willing to testify?"
"I… I don't know. About what I did?" Thea asked.
"About what Jackson did to her." Hilary said.
"Oh." Thea realised, "I-I don't know if I could ask her to do that." She said, "It would have to be her choice. I wouldn't want her to be uncomfortable." She shook her head, "I know that Karen, the detective for the case, she's willing to testify in my favour and present all the evidence from Jude's case." Thea nodded.
"Yeah, I know Karen." Hilary nodded, "She's a good woman. Great detective." Hilary said as Thea nodded.
"When will the trial be?" Dominic asked.
"Well your arraignment is set for next week." Hilary said, "And if I have it my way, we won't need to go to trial. If I can get a plea-bargain which consists of you completing a counselling program, that's the best case scenario." She said, "You're going into this arraignment with a not guilty plea, because I'm not having them charge you with murder." She said, "Worst case scenario we go to trial and given the heinous acts Jackson committed, the prosecution won't have any choice but to offer you lesser punishment, and I'll be making sure jail time is not in that punishment." Hilary said as Thea nodded.
"You really think they're gonna be easy on me?" Thea questioned.
"Hey… it's me they're dealing with. Not you. I'm the one representing you. All you gotta do for me is tell me absolutely everything about that night, about what Jackson did to you in the past, what he did to your sister and your family." Hilary said, "And I will take care of the rest."
"Ok." Thea nodded. It was all very overwhelming. It was all very scary.
"Cass, I think my phone is broken." Punk said, walking into the kitchen where Cassie was sitting on her phone listening to music on her headphones, "Cassie." Punk waved his hand to get her attention as she looked up.
"What?" Cassie took her headphones off.
"My phone is broken." Punk said, sitting down at the table and passing his phone to her.
"It's not broken." Cassie shook her head.
"Things keep popping up." Punk said with frustration as Cassie rolled her eyes.
"You just haven't updated your phone, that's all." Cassie said, sliding it back over to him.
"Well…" Punk slid the phone back over to her, "Can you help me update it? I don't know what to do." He said as Cassie sighed.
"Why are you such a dinosaur?" Cassie shook her head, sitting her headphones over and fixing her father's phone.
"Hey, I'm down with the kids." Punk defended as Cassie looked at him.
"Do not ever say that again in my presence." Cassie warned as Punk smiled a little, putting his hands up.
"Then what should I say?" Punk wondered.
"Nothing is good." Cassie nodded.
"Right." Punk said, watching her update his phone, twiddling his thumbs and sighing to himself.
"Dad." Cassie said whilst fixing his phone.
"Mhm?" Punk said.
"Is Thea gonna go to prison?" Cassie asked, not making eye contact with Punk as he looked across at her, "Like you did?"
"No… no, she's not going anywhere." Punk shook his head, "She's… she's in some trouble but she's got a good lawyer. It shouldn't even have to go to trial." He said, "She's gonna be fine."
"I don't think she did anything wrong." Cassie shrugged as Punk nodded.
"Yeah I don't think so either." Punk agreed, "How is your head doing?" He asked, looking at her few stitches on her forehead.
"It's fine. I get them out next week." Cassie said as Punk nodded.
"So… this cop thing…" Punk said as Cassie smiled a little, "You really serious about it?"
"I'm not holding myself to it." Cassie shook her head, "But I think it would be cool."
"It'd be difficult." Punk nodded.
"I know that." Cassie said, "I feel like I should know what I wanna do with my life but I don't." Cassie admitted.
"You're just sixteen." Punk reminded her, "You still got plenty of time to decide on what you wanna do. Thea didn't know she wanted to be a doctor until she was halfway through college." He said, "And Jude is studying art but she's still not sure what she really wants to do with it." He said.
"Yeah, I guess that's true." Cassie realised.
"There's no rush to grow up, believe me." Punk nodded, hearing AJ coming home from work, realising she was early, "Hey." Punk called from the kitchen.
"Hey." AJ sighed, walking through to the kitchen.
"You're home early." Punk said. She insisted on going back to work. Although things were very much up in the air with Thea, it wasn't like she could do anything. She thought going to work may have helped distract her, but instead it was all she could think about.
"I got sent home." AJ nodded.
"Why?" Punk asked.
"I just… I can't focus, I can't do anything." AJ shook her head, "I just can't stop thinking about Jude and Thea… I can't eat, it makes me feel sick…" She sighed, "They've put me on extended leave, gracious enough to keep paying me." She said, sitting her purse and coat down.
"Look, you gotta take it easy." Punk nodded, "If you feel like the best place for you to be right now is with Jude and Thea then you do it. You're in a good enough job where you can afford to take a break for a little while. And I think it's justifiable."
"Yeah well I did say I would do any work from home if they sent things to me so… at least there's that." AJ sighed, "My brain just feels like spaghetti right now." She shook her head, "Has Thea called? Has she spoken to Hilary yet?"
"No, she hasn't called yet." Punk said. He knew his wife was just running on complete nerves. Their hearts bled for their daughters, for Jude who was still hibernating in bed, for Thea who was up against something so terrifying.
"She said she would call." AJ said nervously.
"And she will." Punk nodded calmly, "Why don't you go take a shower or take a nap? You look-"
"Terrible?" AJ finished for him.
"No, you look exhausted." Punk said.
"Yeah I'm gonna go shower and try wake myself up more." AJ nodded, "You ok, baby?" AJ asked Cassie, hugging her from behind and kissing her head.
"Yeah, I'm just updating dad's phone." Cassie said, "Because he has no initiative." She smiled across to Punk who gave her a forced smile back.
"Look at you, using big words." Punk nodded as Cassie made a face at him.
"Ok, I'm gonna go shower." AJ sighed, leaving the kitchen and heading upstairs. She felt like everything was just hitting her. The never ending fear. The heartache of watching one of her daughters suffer whilst the other's future was hanging by a thread.
"She doesn't look good." Cassie said, sitting her father's phone over once she'd fixed it.
"She's not sleeping." Punk shook his head, "She's just worried. Worried about Thea. About Jude." He said as Cassie nodded.
"It's gonna be ok, though. Right?" Cassie asked, "I mean I… I thought the hard part was over." She said, of course still young and naïve.
"Well yeah, it is but… there's always the aftermath. The uncertainty with Thea and… worrying about Jude with what she's dealing with…" Punk sighed.
"I think it's gonna be ok." Cassie nodded as Punk looked across at her. Oddly, hearing it from someone else actually did make a difference. He was sick of his own voice in his head telling himself that things would be ok. Hearing it from Cassie helped.
"Yeah?" Punk questioned as Cassie nodded.
"I know my sisters. They don't let other people win." Cassie said as Punk smiled to himself.
"Yeah, I guess you're right." Punk smiled, "Hey so if… if you become a cop, can you like erase all my records from the system?"
"You're an idiot." Cassie chuckled, putting her headphones back on as Punk smiled. Cassie had a sense of togetherness and stability that he hadn't come across in someone so young. She was fearless, and hearing her say things would be ok really made him believe it.
Meanwhile AJ had made her way upstairs to take a shower, stopping into the spare bedroom here Jude had been hiding out, knocking on the door and walking in to check on her.
"Yes, I'm still here." Jude nodded, lying in bed watching TV as AJ smiled.
"Just checking." AJ said, "What you watching?" She asked, looking over at the TV.
"Say Yes To The Dress." Jude said.
"Oh, you used to love that." AJ smiled, walking over to the bed, "I remember you used to watch this when you came home from school." She nodded.
"Yeah. It's different people now." Jude said, "I thought you were going to work today?" Jude asked.
"I've decided I'm just gonna take a little bit of time off." AJ nodded, "Work can wait."
"Mom, I don't want you stopping your life for me or for Thea. You've done enough of that over the years." Jude shook her head.
"It's best for me right now." AJ assured her, "Have you ate anything today?" She asked.
"Dad brought me coffee and a bagel earlier." Jude nodded, "We watched Star Wars." She said, "Then I fell asleep." She said as AJ nodded.
"Maybe later you could help me make some dinner? If you're up to it." AJ said. They were very much letter Jude heal and cope with things how she wanted to. AJ knew there was no right or wrong way to heal from something like this.
"Yeah, maybe I'll come down later." Jude nodded, "Has Thea called?"
"No, not yet. I guess Hilary was with her all day." AJ said as Jude nodded, "When she calls I'll fill you in, don't worry." She said as Jude nodded.
"You wanna see something?" Jude asked, reaching down the side of the bed, grabbing her sketch pad up as AJ watched curiously as she opened it up, noticing she had began to draw something.
"Oh, wow." AJ walked over, sitting down on the bed beside her, "When did you start this?"
"So I just woke up at like 3am last night and… I was thinking about that trip to New York and all the cool stuff I saw and… I think I got a little bit of inspiration back." Jude said as AJ smiled.
"Oh, yeah?" AJ smiled so big.
"It didn't stay for very long but… I don't know, I felt like me again. It sounds dumb but-"
"No it doesn't." AJ shook her head, "Baby, this is gonna be a rocky journey of ups and downs." She said.
"Yeah, I know." Jude said, "Kinda waiting for the ups to come along now." She nodded eagerly.
"They'll be coming." AJ assured her, "This is great." She pointed to the sketch pad.
"It felt great." Jude nodded.
"You do what you need to do to get yourself through this, and we'll all just follow behind you. Catch you when you get tired." AJ smiled, tucking a strand of Jude's hair behind her ear as Jude leaned against her hand.
Everything still felt so uneasy, like the roadblocks would never end, but they still had each other and that was enough to get them through.