I look over my shoulder as I'm walking towards the window, making sure that Monica isn't about to catch me talking again, and then said. "Kens? Kensi, you there? I know you can hear me."
"What?" Kensi asked, testily.
I lifted one corner the blind and asked. "Where you parked?"
"Down the street." She said.
"I can't even see you." I said.
"That's the whole point of surveillance." she said. And sarcastically, I might add. I thought.
"Yeah, well, I'm sorry you had to hear that. I guarantee it sounded worse than it actually was." I said.
"Who cares." she said.
"Oh my God, I'm sure Sam doesn't act like this when Callen gets hit on." I said.
"Act like what? I'm just sitting here covering you ass. Not sure what she's doing with it." she said.
"You wouldn't even know what do with my ass even if you had." I said.
"Whatever. I know there are a lot of things I could be doing with, and to that ass, but you'll never find out." she said.
"With the temper tantrum you throwing right now, you'll never get the chance to." I said.
Kensi rebuttal fell on deaf ears because Monica came walking out wear nothing but a tank top, bra, a very revealing set of underwear, and brush in her hand. She fixed her hair, and then walked toward me saying. "We should go to Monaco, you know? Like James Bond in Casino Royale."
"It's Montenegro." Kensi said.
I smirk at Kensi correction, but I let Monica's fantasy play out because I really am tired of Kensi little tantrum.
"You could get a tuxedo." Monica said.
"Hmm." I said, trying to imagine where this was going.
"And I'd get some hot dress. And we'd be drinking champagne and playing roulette." Monica continued.
"No wonder she likes you. She's delusional." Kensi said.
"Okay, first off, Casino Royale actually happened in Montenegro, and secondly, we're not going anywhere until we sort this out." I said.
Monica was impressed, I think impressed is the word I'm looking for, judging by her reaction to my correcting her knowledge of the location where the movie took place. Monica probably still wants to go there.
"Where's Montenegro?" Monica asked.
"Yeah, Deeks, where's Montenegro?" Kensi said.
"It's in Europe, and it shares a border with Croatia, Bosnia and Herzegovina, Serbia, Albania, and the Adriatic Sea." I said.
"Lucky guess." Kensi said.
"The beaches are topless." Monica said, biting her lower lip.
"Look at that, she speaks Deeks. Match made in heaven." Kensi said.
I remember Kenzie being insufferable when she was playing some kind of game with me, and was forcing me to wait to the end to receive my prize, which was usually adult oriented. But Kensi is just being insufferable for the sake of being insufferable. This better have nothing to do with the box. I thought.
"We'll get you a sexy speedo." Monica said.
"I'd pay to see that." Kensi quipped.
"People would pay to see that." Is aid.
"I know I would." Monica said.
"Tell her not to waste her money. It's too small a return on her investment." Kensi quipped, and then laughed.
I was doing my best to suppress a smile and a laugh. Kensi is talking trash about me, without actually knowing what I've done. Like having Kenzie screaming my name each and every time we laid down together, and having four kids with Kenzie. I thought.
"What? What's so funny?" Monica asked.
"Nothing, I was just laughing at the joke you just told." I said.
"Oh, you never find any of my jokes funny, Maxi." Monica said.
"That's because you aren't funny." Kensi said.
"No, I do laugh at your jokes because you're very funny. You say clever things that are very funny." I said.
A phone starts ringing. Monica looked down, and said. "It's my phone." Monica reached down, and brought the phone closer, and saw that it was her boss. "It's Waaldt" Monica said.
"Don't answer that." I said.
"Why not?" Monica asked.
"Because he can use that to trace us here." I said.
"Heh. You're getting paranoid." Monica said, and the walked away to take the call.
"Don't answer the phone." I said.
"Hello?" Monica, said answering the phone.
Right now, both of these women are starting to get on my nerves.
"Not the brightest Barbie in the toy box, is she?" Kensi asked.
I turned my back to Monica, and conferred with Kensi. "Okay, that doesn't even make any sense." I said.
I almost jumped out of my skin when I heard Monica's side of the conversation. "No, you listen. Yeah, I've got them. And if you them back, you're gonna have to pay for them. I'm not afraid of you. Heh. Whatever. Hells yeah, did you hear that?" Monica said as she hung up the phone.
"I heard it." Kensi said.
"I definitely heard it." Monica asked.
"Did it sound like I meant business?" Monica asked.
"Sounded like she just signed her own death warrant." Kensi said.
"Antagonizing him isn't going help anything." I said.
"Screw him. Why are you acting so weird?" she asked.
"I'm not." I said.
"Are you getting cold feet? Because it's a little too late for that. You knew Waaldt had diamonds." Monica said.
"I didn't know he had diamonds." I said.
"That's why you wanted me to snoop around. Don't pretend it's not." Monica said.
"No, it wasn't." I said.
"No, you wanted to know where they were so that you could steal them. But I stole them for you. You should be happy. And you should be thanking me. You and I are gonna live happily ever after in luxury." Monica said.
"Clearly delusional." Kensi said.
"So I'm gonna get changed and you and I can go out and celebrate." Monica said.
"We're not gonna go out and celebrate." I said.
"Yes, we are." Monica said.
"No, we're not." I said.
"Celebrate." Monica said, raising her hands are she was walking away.
"Put your paws down." I said.
"Celebrate.'" Monica said again.
"Oh, my God. Please help me." I said.
"You brought it on yourself, Maxi." Kensi said.
"You're not helping. You are not helping." I said.
A couple of hours passes, and we still haven't heard from Waaldt. Elsewhere, Sam and Callen picked up the guy that tried to kill Monica and me this morning, and took him the boat shed. Back at the cover house, Monica had finished taking her shower, got dressed, and was blow drying her hair when I said. "Waaldt should've called back by now."
"You don't have to yell." Kensi said in my ear.
"I'm not talking to you." I said to Kensi.
A few seconds later I heard a knock at the door, and I went all worst case scenario in my head. "Hey. Stay in the bedroom. I'm closing this. Stay in the bedroom." I said, as I shut the door. This sets Monica off. She gets dressed real fast, puts the diamonds in her purse while setting out a decoy pouch, and climbs out the window, running away. This all happens as I'm approaching the door, gun drawn. "Kens, somebody's here." I said.
I look through the peephole to see Kensi waggling one of her eyebrows at me, and had a smile on her face. You could have just told me you were approaching the house. I thought, but said. "Oh, you have got to be kidding me."
I opened the door, and asked. "Hi. Who are you?"
"Kelly Lang, neighborhood watch. We've gotten reports concerning some suspicious and lewd behavior coming from this residence." Kensi said.
At suspicious and lewd behavior comment, I start nodding my head, because that statement sums up the past few months, pucker my lips as I turn to look at the bedroom door. "She's in the bedroom." I said, turning to look back at Kensi.
"Oh, where she does her finest work. I'm sure." she said, and then entered.
"Thank God. She's gonna hear you." I said.
"Good. Ahem. Callen and Sam have the guy that tried to kill you both. They think she might help turn him. And if Waaldt's traced her phone, the safe house is no longer safe." She said.
All she had to do was take those photos. That's all she had to do, but no. She had to go and screw the whole this thing up. I thought, but said. "God, I hate this part."
"The part where you say everything was a lie? That you'rea big fat liar? That part?" she asked.
I glare at Kensi because she's pissed at me for working an undercover assignment without her knowledge and she's taking out her frustration on me knowing that Granger would just pull rank. I never had this problem with Kenzie. Kenzie was territorial, not jealous. I thought, but said. "Don't do that. Don't gloat." I said.
"I'm not gloating." she said.
"You're gloating." I said, but knowing full well what the real emotion is that needs to addressed.
"Wasn't gloating." she said.
"That's a little unbecoming, actually." I said. I knocked on the door. "Monica." No answer. "Monica?" I said.
I enter the room, to see the window open, blow dryer still running, and no Monica.
"Where is she?" Kensi asked, still outside the room.
"No." I said, as I reach to shut off the blow dryer, and grab the pouch.
I have a feeling of what happened, and this could have gone down differently if Monica would have just taken the photos like I asked her.
I opened the pouch in front of Kensi to reveal that Monica had replaced it was something other than diamonds. I dumped the material on the floor, and said. "Should've see that coming."
Kensi and I leave the cover house, looking for Monica. We get in the SRX and drive until Eric tells us to get out and start walking. When we get within a few blocks of Monica, Kensi asks. "Eric, how far now?"
"Uh, she's about half a block ahead of you on the left. She's stopped moving." Eric said.
"I can't believe she double-crossed me." I said, finally breaking my silence.
"Yeah, just when you were about to live your life happily ever after in luxury, she played you." Kensi said.
"She's actually not that bad. She just—"
"Has poor judgement?" Kensi said, finishing my statement.
"Exactly." I said.
"Like her taste in men." she said.
"Oh, see, I see what you tried to do there but it's not gonna work. Because she wasn't actually involved with me, she was involved with my alter ego, Max Gentry." I said.
"Hang on a second. Not your undercover legend?" she asked.
"Yeah, no, that's what I meant." I said.
"No, no, no, you said alter ego. That's complete different." she said.
"Superheroes have alter egos." I said.
"No, no, superheroes have secret identities. Schizophrenics have alter egos, like Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde." she said.
"Or you when you haven't had chocolate, or during your lady phase." I said, following the same trail that Kensi was on.
"Shut up." she said, smiling a genuine smile.
"Ooh, speaking of crazy women…" I said, when I spotted Monica at an outdoor café.
"All right, stay here." she said.
"Why am I staying here?" I asked.
"Um, maybe because is she sees you, she's gonna wanna run again, like most women." she said.
"Except for you. You don't run for me." I said.
"That's because I carry a gun. Now, make yourself useful and back me up." Kensi said, and then walked away.
"I'll just be here holding your purse." I said.
I watched silence as a train wreck was waiting to happen. And as expect, Monica was cagey and ready to fight. I like a cat fight as much as the next guy, but I really don't want to prolong this encounter any longer.
"Freeze!" I shout.
Monica looked at me in surprise. I was standing there with my gun drawn ready to back up Kensi.
"Max. What are you doing? Shoot her." Monica said.
"Sorry, honey, he's with me. And his real name is Marty Deeks, and he's a federal agent and he's my partner. Who's bitch now?" Kensi asked. Monica was glaring at me the entire time Kensi was doing the tell all.
"He is." Monica said.
"Can't argue with that." Kensi said.
"Says the spurned women." I said.
I didn't even wait for a reply, or to see Kensi's face. I already know what her face was going to look, and honestly, I relish in the fact that I pissed them both off. Monica knew that I was using her. I said that from the first day that I met her. All Monica had to do was take some photo's, and let me do the rest. And Kensi? Well, Kensi is being completely and totally unprofessional. The ride to the boat shed was made in complete silence. It was so quiet that silence was deafening.
N.C.I.S. L.A.
Boatshed-
"What kind of police station is this?" Monica asked, when we entered the boatshed.
"The kind you don't ask about. Sit." Kensi said, as she and Monica approached the table.
"Seriously? You're not gonna say anything?" Monica asked.
"I got nothing to say." I said, walking by the table not even looking at Kensi.
"Yeah." Monica said.
"Yeah." I said, tersely as I turned back to look at Monica.
A door opened, and we all turned to see Sam, Callen, and the guy who tried to kill Monica and me this morning, enter the main hall.
"What's he doing here?" Monica asked, afraid for her life.
"Same thing you are." Kensi said.
"Next time I won't miss." the man said.
"Shut up and keep moving." Sam said, shoving the man towards the stairs.
As Sam took the man to the second interrogation room, Callen updated Kensi and me.
"The diamonds she stole were to broker a deal with Isaak Sidorov." Callen said softly.
"Are you kidding me?" I asked, my eyes almost popped out my skull.
"Who's the buyer?" Kensi asked.
"Smit doesn't know." Callen said.
"Well, did anybody recognize Sam as David Forman or mention Quinn?" Kensi asked.
"No, their covers are intact. Picked Sidorov out of a photo array. Said that Sidorov met face-to-face with his boss, Waaldt." Callen said.
"Holy crap, this is huge." I said.
"Okay, so, what do we do now?" Kensi asked.
"We make a plan, and fast." Callen said.
I look over my shoulder at Monica. A few seconds later, Monica and I lock eyes.
N.C.I.S. L.A.
OPS: Ops-
Hetty, Sam, Callen, and I were up in Ops, gathered around the center console while Hetty appraised the diamonds.
"Johannes Waaldt was brokering a deal with Bernosoni using ten million dollars' worth of blood diamonds to buy one or more of Sidorov's nuclear bombs for an unknown buyer." Callen said.
On the big screen behind us, the video feed of interrogation one was live and it show the sole occupant: Monica.
"I'd bet more twelve million." Hetty said, talking about the diamonds.
"What's a couple million amongst friends, huh?" Callen asked.
"Well, Waaldt's gonna need some serious coin to cover that kind of loss." I said.
"You know, by now, he must be wondering where Smit is. Maybe we can convince Waaldt that Smit and Monica stole the diamonds together." Sam said.
"I know somebody that can make that story stick." I said.
"You think she'll play ball?" Callen asked.
"She won't want to, but she'll do it." I said.
Callen nods his head, and Hetty looks up at me. Here comes the hardest part of all: confronting Monica.
N.C.I.S. L.A.
Boatshed-
Sam, Callen, and Kensi watch Monica and I have a staring contest for a while, and then Monica said. "I told you things I never told anybody else. We did things I never did with anybody else."
"Two things. First: I'm sorry, but that wasn't me. That was Max. And secondly, we never did anything. I did listen to the stories that you told me. But if I remember correctly, I told you the first night we met that this wasn't going anywhere. That I was there for the job." I said.
Monica was a little incense, but she kept going. "I risked my life for you."
"I never asked you to steal the diamonds." I said.
"You took advantage of me." Monica said.
"As I recall, you're the one who tried to rip me off." I said.
"I thought you were getting cold feet. I was doing it—never mind. We never existed." Monica said.
"Just to be perfectly clear, I never forced you to do anything." I said.
Monica stared at me a moment, and then said. "Keep telling yourself that."
"Cut the crap. I told you to take pictures of the diamonds to protect you from any backlash that would come from stealing the diamonds. And now you're in this until it's done. This mess is on you." I said.
Monica glared at me, but said nothing. What could she say? I'm a federal agent, with infinite lives, she is a civilian with a price on her head. Monica is royally, and thoroughly, screwed. "What now?" Monica asked.
"So, what now is you have a choice. This is your third strike? Yeah? And you stole millions of dollars of merchandise, you assaulted a federal officer, and with your record you're looking at twenty-five to life." I said.
"Just cut to the chase. Just tell me the truth for once." Monica said.
"I never lied to you. I took advantage of you in a moment of weakness. You had big dreams, and I used that to get to the diamonds, but I never lied. If I remember correctly, I stated earlier that this was only about the diamonds, but I digress. Work with us. Help us make the diamond exchange with Waaldt. And if it leads to his arrest and the arrest of Sidorov, you walk away free." I said.
"That's it?" Monica asked.
"It's that simple." I said.
"Oh screw simple. What about the reward for the diamonds? I mean, they gotta be worth something." Monica said.
"God bless you, always the hustler." I said.
"Yeah, takes one to know one." Monica said.
After a moment of silence, I concede her point. "Fair enough." I said.
"Why should I believe a word you say?" Monica asked.
"True. You could call my bluff, but what choice do you have? Do you have any other options?" I asked.
"You took those from me." Monica said.
"Again, I told you to take pictures of the diamonds, so I could steal them. If you had not stolen the diamonds, we wouldn't be in this mess. You wouldn't have gotten to say goodbye, but you wouldn't be in any trouble." I said.
Monica shakes her head. There was a moment of silence before I ask. "So, what's it gonna be, Monica?"
"What do I have to do?" Monica asked.
"Call Waaldt. You tell him it was Smit's idea. He tried to kill you, tried to double-cross you, and you're now scared. You tell him you have the diamonds and you'll give them back to him for one hundred thousand dollars cash. Give him an hour to meet you at the L.A. Music Centre with the cash or you'll find another buyer. I said.
"Don't suppose to keep the cash after we done?" Monica asked.
"What do you think?" I asked.
Monica looked at the camera for a split second and then said. "You can tell your buddies I'm in, but I'm asking Waaldt for two fifty. I might be scared, but I'm not stupid."
"Love it." I said.
Monica looks at me for a split seconds, her countenance becoming sad, and then leans in. I lean in, and Monica's whispers something in my ear. Sam and Callen look at Kensi, who is looks away from the plasma, but they can tell that she is upset. On the plasma, I look up at the camera, and then leave the room.
"She's all yours." I said, when I entered the main hall.
I said my peace, and kept walking. I went outside, and stare off into the distance. Thirty minutes later, Callen joined me asking. "How does it feel?"
"To piss off the woman who resembles my wife?" I asked.
"Straight to the point." Callen said.
"Of course I'm going to get to the point. And If I had to guess you already knew that I was involved with a woman that Kensi resembled. And if I had to guess, you've known since Granger came on board. I'm guessing you only found out recently that I was married to said woman, and at the same time you found out Nell swore you and Sam to secrecy. Did I leave anything out?" I asked.
"Nope, you hit everything." Callen said.
"What do you want Callen?" I asked.
"What was the plan?" Callen asked.
"The plan was as I said. Monica was supposed to photograph the diamonds, and then I was going to steal the diamonds and ride off into the sunset." I said.
"I'm being serious." Callen said.
"So am I. I didn't think Monica was going to off the rails, and steal the diamonds, or the fact that Granger was going to be M.I.A the whole time." I said, glaring at Callen.
"Was it all true?" Callen asked.
"What do you think?" I asked, staring off into the distance.
"You know that you're going to have to square it with Kensi someday." Callen said.
"Why should I? I was asked by Granger to find the diamonds, and to do it through Monica. Did we shared a bed, and a few kisses? Yes, I did. Would Granger have expected me to have sex with Monica to make sure this assignment succeeded? Yes, he would. But I decided to be up front and honest with Monica, and skip the sexual aspect of the relationship. Why should I apologize for doing the job that Granger would have asked any of you to do?" I asked.
Callen didn't answer my question, and he couldn't answer it even if he wanted to.
N.C.I.S. L.A.
OPS: Armory-
I was in the armory removing a slug from the vest that Monica wore. Waaldt came with a gun, and two bodyguards, but he wasn't expecting us to stop him. I was occupied by removing the slug from vest that I didn't see Kensi enter. "Hey." Kensi said.
"Hey, you're still here." I said, genuinely surprised by Kensi's presence.
"Yeah." she said.
"How come?" I asked, returning my attention to the vest.
"I, uh, couldn't find you. You didn't pick up your phone." She said.
"Must have left in my car." I lied because I really don't want to discuss an assignment that was a need to know, and nobody needed to know.
"Hetty wanted me to give you this." she said, dropping a small envelop on the table in front of me.
"Okay." I said, frowning at the envelope.
There was a moment of silence before Kensi asked. "How's Monica?"
"Um, she's sore. Obviously lucky." I said. I look into Kensi's eyes and I can tell she wants me to say something, but I refuse to budge. I did my job, nothing more. And I did it without having sex with Monica, what more does she want? I thought. There was another moment of silence, and then I asked. "How's Waaldt?"
"Waaldt lawyered in the ambulance and he hasn't said a word. Literally a word." she said.
"Well, maybe he'll change his mind." I said.
"Yeah, who knows?" she said.
"So, I was—"
"Listen, I didn't—"
We both started talking at the same time, and then stopped talking.
"Sorry, go ahead. I wasn't—"
"No please." she said.
I can feel an emotional break down coming on because I want Kensi to be honest with me, and I have the feeling she's going to lie to me and to herself. "I was just gonna see if you were good." I said.
Kensi reaction told me one thing, she had a look of dumbfounded, but she said. "Yeah. Heh. You?"
God! I hate being right! I thought, as I ran my right hand down my face. My thumb and index finger stop on my cheek bones and I just blink at Kensi. Kensi flinched, but kept her composure. Fine. I thought, furious at Kensi's unwillingness to be open and honest with me. We've been partners for two years, and she still doesn't trust me. I thought. A feeling of helplessness comes over me, just like last year when I found out that Kensi mother was still alive. It took me a moment to find my voice. "I mean, I'm good if you good." I said.
"I'm good." she said, but her expression was anything but good.
"Okay. Good. We're good. Which is, you know, great." I said. I was doing my best to not fly off the handle at Kensi for lying to my face.
"Glad we cleared that up." she said, her face an emotionless mask.
I know that look. I have seen it a few times in the past, but Kensi doesn't have the guts to tell me the truth. What is she so pissed off about? I thought. There was a moment of silence before Kensi said. "See you tomorrow."
Kensi left without a backwards glance. I started to open the envelope, but I looked to make sure Kensi wasn't standing there waiting for me to open said envelope. When I was sure that Kensi wasn't coming back, I opened the envelope, and pulled out a folded piece of paper. I open the paper to see three words.
"Sunshine and gunpowder." I said, with a chuckle. Thanks Hetty, but it doesn't solve the problem that my partner has about trusting me, let alone telling me that she has a problem. I thought, but I returned my attention to the vest sitting on the table.