Chapter 53: I Need Help

Meredith went into her office shortly after leaving the ladies room and closed the door behind her, secluding herself from the rest of the hospital. She felt butterflies in her stomach and sat down behind her desk. This was it, or it could be it. She pulled the white stick out from her lab coat and set it face up on her desk. She looked at the screen and let out a frustrated sigh.

'not pregnant'

She closed her eyes and pressed her lips together before tossing it into the wastebasket under her desk where all the others went in the past few months. She knew that it hadn't been long enough to stir up concern, but she was getting impatient, and she felt old. She wanted to be pregnant right now, the clock was ticking, and she knew that the older she got the more difficult it would be to take care of a baby. Sure, she had Derek, but she wanted to be a fairly young mom, and her dream of that was slipping with each month.

She looked at her schedule and noticed her morning free, so she got up and exited the office as she headed to the elevator. She hit the OB floor and luckily no one else was on the elevator to see her get off there. She walked up to the admitting desk where an overly friendly nurse gave her a beaming smile.

"Can I help you Doctor?" she asked.

"Addison Forbes Montgomery." Meredith said in a cool surgeon tone. The clerk was a little taken back but nodded.

"Let me page her."

"No need." She heard behind the station and Meredith looked up to see a stone jawed red head staring at her. "I'm right here."

"Addison." Meredith faked a smile.

"What do you want, Meredith?"

"A word in private would be nice."

Addison arched her brow "Something must be up, you're acting too nice."

"Acting being the key phrase." Meredith smirked.

"Follow me." Addison shook her head and led Meredith around the hallway and to a back-exam room. Meredith hopped up on the table as Addison leaned against the counter "What."

"Still bitter after all these years?"

"You stole my boyfriend on prom night."

"Do you honestly think he'd have been your boyfriend all that much longer?" Meredith asked, "I mean, he was a wild hair, and you wanted to settle down."

"Something tells me that you were the wild hair and he just followed you wherever."

"Water under the bridge." Meredith sighed "Is this going to get in the way of our professional relationship?"

"We have no professional relationship." Addison frowned, "I'm an OB-GYN and you're a surgeon. We hardly see each other."

"So, I'll take that as a no?"

"What is this about, Meredith?" Addison scoffed "I have patients to see. Don't surgeons have patients to see?"

"I have a floor full." She nodded "But I made the time to come see you."

"Something tells me that it wasn't because you missed my face."

"No." Meredith mumbled and played with her fingers, Addison saw that something was bothering Meredith, and though she didn't like her much she felt compelled to listen, Meredith finally looked up and let out a soft sigh "Derek and I are trying to have a baby."

"Ok," Addison let out a dry laugh "I don't need to hear the details."

"Addison I need you to check me out." Meredith almost pleaded "You're the best. Believe me I'd love to spare the both of us the discomfort of interaction, but I need help, and you're the best there is. So please, just…get it over with."

Addison could see the desperation in her voice and let out a hard sigh before pulling out a notepad and pen. "How long have you been trying?"

"Three months."

"Meredith." She laughed "That's nothing, it usually takes most people six."

"I'm twenty-eight."

"I've had mom's over forty before."

"I'm twenty-eight." Meredith repeated, "I can't wait another three months to try and see if I can get pregnant or not. I'm running out of time, I don't want to be pregnant past thirty because of my blood disease, Pyphoria, you know it gets worse with age and the younger I am when I conceive, the less likely the baby is to catch this genetic defect. And not to mention also ten years ago I got pregnant while on the pill. I feel like something is wrong."

"On the pill huh?" Addison raised her brow "I didn't know you had a kid."

"Surprise." Meredith grinned.

"Well I'll run labs and do an exam. If anything, I'll see about prescribing something to help you along."

"Thank you." Meredith said with relief.

She got into a gown and submitted to an exam. Addison was good, and professional, she remained so whether she liked the patient or not. As routine she started to palpate Meredith's abdomen and then breasts. She stopped and frowned but turned to write something in her chart.

"What?" Meredith asked.

"Nothing." Addison said mum "Your exam looked normal."

"That look you just gave me didn't seem like everything was normal."

Addison hesitated a blow off response but then considered that Meredith was a doctor "Meredith, how often do you do a self-breast exam?"

"I don't know." She frowned "Derek grabs the damn things enough; I figure if he feels anything out of place, he'll tell me…why?'

"Ever heard of too much information?" Addison asked through her teeth, Meredith shrugged. "I just, I felt something but it's probably nothing."

"What." Meredith frowned "What did you feel?"

"Here." Addison said, she took Meredith's hand and brought it to her lower left breast and prodded "Feel that?" Meredith's eyes tightened as she nodded.

"What is it?"

"Most likely a cyst." Addison said, "but at your age…I'd like to do a needle biopsy."

"I know you're not trying to subtly tell me I'm old." Meredith glared "You're a month older than me."

"Relax." Addison smirked "I'll be right back with the aspiration kit."

Meredith nodded and gulped after she left the room. She kept poking and prodding the lump, it did indeed feel like a cyst and she had no reason to worry but she didn't like it being there. Addison came in a minute later with a tray of instruments. Meredith looked over just as Addison snapped gloves on and held up a long needle and smirked.

"You know," Meredith said, "Those needles don't look nearly as big when you're the one holding them."

"Don't worry." Addison giggled lightly "I won't hurt you any more than I have to."

"I know…that's what I'm afraid of."