Hostiles On the Hill

"More bad news?" asked Count Dooku, his voice scathing.

The Count scowled at Yoda. Silently blaming the small Grand Master for most of their problems. Over the years, he and Sifo-Dyas had spoken at length about the general ineffectiveness of the Jedi Order and their disappointment at how the Jedi Order was being used as the watchdog of the Republic. Now it seemed his friend had gone, taken by the vampires and the only one who'd tried to warn them of their danger was the Slayer. Goodness knows what his end might have been if he hadn't met Buffy and stayed to train her.

Next to him, Quinlan Vos's normally jovial personality became even more subdued. He'd returned from a mission only that morning and was shocked to find how much the vampire situation had worsened during his short absence.

Mace shuffled in his chair, uncomfortable to be the bearer of more bad news. Count Dooku had always put him on edge. "As I was telling you earlier, the Jedi team reported Jar Jar's ritual room had been completely emptied by someone before we could secure it."

Obi-Wan knew that not everything from that room had been lost. The Jedi Order still didn't know about the pyramid-shaped holocron that presently felt as if it was burning a hole inside his pocket. Without thinking, the young knight raised a hand to touch it. He caught himself and quickly dropped the hand back to his side. Now wasn't the right time to declare it. Master Yoda and Master Windu would think it odd he'd not handed it over and start questioning him in front of Dooku and the others. He knew what would happen if they did.

The Count already thought he had a drinking problem. It was likely he'd inform Council that he'd caught Obi-Wan lying drunk in the corridor when he was supposed to have been protecting Buffy. Dooku would most likely say that forgetting to hand over the Sith holocron was a sign of short-term memory loss due to Obi-Wan's alcoholism. The Council would immediately demand his return to the Temple, Buffy would refuse to leave her hunt, and he'd need to disobey orders to remain with her.
No, it was definitely better not to admit having the holocron right now. Obi-Wan decided he'd wait and declare it later. Perhaps once they got back on Coruscant he'd-.

"Obi-Wan,-"

Hearing his name, Obi-Wan flinched guiltily. Luckily, Mace Windu wasn't looking at him and continued, "provided us with images of the circle which we passed along to Master It'ilin. From these images, the investigator used his expertise and knowledge of ancient languages to translate the hieroglyphs. He then shared the information with Andrew."

Andrew rose to his feet. "Master It'ilin is so cool," he gushed before remembering Yoda was watching him. His voice changed, as he tried to impersonate a much older, more sedate man. "The hieroglyphs around the summoning circle were written in an ancient form of the Sith language. Master It'ilin and I pondered their interpretation for several hours before we both drew the same conclusion.
It could only have been a Sith Mage who drew the summoning circle. No doubt one well-versed in the Dark Arts of the Sith as, to even attempt such a difficult piece of sorcery, it suggests one with extensive knowledge and confidence. One who perhaps-"

"Get on with it already," heckled Buffy. She knew they'd be waiting all week for Andrew to get to the point if no one encouraged him to finish.

Andrew shot her a glare. It wasn't fair. She always got the limelight. Now it was his turn to shine in front of the Jedi, she was trying to spoil his big moment and draw the attention back to her by interrupting.
"As I was saying before I was most rudely interrupted by Miss Summers, the purpose of the circle was to raise a Force Ghost. The Mage uses dust from a bone of the person they hope to raise, along with an item once considered precious to them. Only someone strong enough in the Force can be raised and, since it's highly unlikely the Sith would raise a Jedi, we concluded that this ghost must once have been a highly powerful Sith Lord. That's 'Lord' as in male or female. I'm not being gender-specific by using that title," added Andrew. "This one could easily be a female. In fact, some of the hieroglyphs suggest it."

"Why raise a ghost?" Quin asked. He'd kept quiet until now, but this was confusing him. "We're taught that after death a person becomes one with the Force. If you could raise their consciousness, what use would a ghost be? Surely it would just float off?

"Ah!" smirked Andrew who knew the answer to this. "It's done to enslave them and learn the secrets they knew while alive. While many can summon the dead or demonic, not everyone is powerful enough in the dark arts to control them. I know this. I've got a long history of summoning demons-."

Buffy tutted loudly.

Andrew's cheeks became red and he lost the little smirk. "Um, you see that's where the personal item comes in. It's not only a vital part of the summoning ritual, but it also puts them under the control of the Mage. Should the Mage lose the item the conjured ghost could go off and do, er, whatever it is ghosts enjoy doing in their spare time."

"Those skeletons that went missing. Will they also be raised as ghosts?" Mace asked, wondering how many Force ghosts they were going to come across.

Andrew shook his head. "Interestingly, you don't need a full skeleton to raise a ghost, but you do to reanimate a zombie. I believe the skeletons were going to be used for a different purpose. You see, whereas Force ghosts retain all their previous knowledge, self-awareness, and intelligence, zombies do not. They are... brain dead. You don't need any brain activity to be able to fight-."

"Oi!" objected Buffy.

Andrew paled as he realized what he'd said. "Sorry. I wasn't calling Slayers brainless. Or even brain dead. I just meant that ghosts can't interact with the physical world in the same way that something reanimated can. The skeletons would be just zombie fighters, using what little brains they have for that."

"But they haven't got any brains," Buffy pointed out the flaw in the theory. "Skeletons have empty heads. Unless there's brain bits still inside, rotting away."

Obi-Wan shot her a scolding look. He wished she wasn't so offhand about rotting corpses and skeletons. Such remarks were not only disrespectful but rather dark.

"A type of zombie then," replied Andrew as he sat down on the sofa next to Quin. "You've seen Jason and the Argonauts haven't you? Lack of a brain didn't stop those skeletons from fighting against Jason and his crew. Zombies have no brain activity yet they can still fight. My guess is the Sith want to reanimate them and use them as soldiers."

"Oh, like those Sith zombies we found milling about in the Jedi basement," Buffy exclaimed.

Yoda's ears flattened and he shot her a sullen look.

"What? What have I said?"

Next to her, Obi-Wan sighed.

"Quick to judge others, you are!" said Yoda, he pointed his stick at her. "See through you, I can."

"Quick to judge?" Buffy stirred angrily. "Look who's talking! Strange how you judged me as a Sith as soon as you met me, but failed to see the real ones milling about on your doorstep for years!"

The two of them glared at each other.

"I think we should continue," Nick said. He rubbed at his forehead with his robe sleeve. Wiping away the droplets of sweat that had suddenly appeared. "There's a lot to get through. Andrew, is there any clue to the identification of the Force ghost that's been raised?"

"Nope," replied Andrew, "but you were so lucky it wasn't Darth Bane." The Watcher grinned, losing himself in the private world of bad boy addiction. His eyes shone with excitement and a big smile plastered across his face, as he explained, "Darth Bane was a totally wicked Sith who hated the Jedi! He was the one who thought up the rule of two that all the later Sith followed. One master and one apprentice. Once the apprentice was strong and wise enough he killed his master and took the title of Lord."

"That's stupid," said Buffy. "No one would take an apprentice in case they got killed."

Andrew ignored her. "I bet the ring the vampires made off with was his. It makes sense. Yeah, and if they find another of Bane's bones both the Jedi and the Sith had better watch out. He's gonna be hard for them to control and if he breaks free he'll no doubt latch onto a Force wielder and turn them into his Sith apprentice. Yeah, Bane's bad. He'll soon bring the galaxy to its knees."

"Taking this serious, you are not!" snapped Yoda, who'd become more and more dismayed at Andrew's Sith-boy worship. "Evil you are supposed to fight. Be liking these Sith, you should not!" The small master shot a reproachful look at Mace Windu, who sat clutching his 'Sith Boys Have More Fun' mug to his chest.

"I am taking it seriously!" whined Andrew, offended by the accusation. "I've got all these totally radical ideas for disposing of unwanted ghosts. There's the Dark Reaper." He turned to the blue image of Buffy and explained, "That's a weapon created by the Sith. They used it to rip the life force from entire planets and destroy everything. I was thinking of finding it, rigging something up to it, and using it to yank Sith ghosts from out the Force."

Flabbergasted at how Andrew knew about the existence of an ancient and long lost Sith weapon, Yoda opened and closed his mouth silently several times. Eventually, he managed to croak out, "Lost to all, that device is."

Count Dooku smirked darkly and cleared his throat. "Actually, it isn't. I know where the main part of the device is. The Force Harvester."

That gained everyone's attention. Seeing their shock and suspicion, the Count continued, "I wasn't actively setting out to look for it," he assured them, "it merely cropped up in conversation."

The entire room stared at him dubiously. Everyone wondering what sort of conversation he'd been having for such an obscure, dangerous weapon to be brought up. The Count waved off their suspicion with, "Why would I want to rebuild a weapon of mass destruction?"

"It's on Raxus Prime isn't it?" squeaked Andrew. He'd put his mug down and now sat, gripping the edges of the sofa cushion with both hands, hyped up with a combination of adrenaline and a sugar high through eating too many cookies.

"No," replied Dooku dourly. "It isn't on that dirty, garbage slewn poisonous world. It's somewhere else entirely."

"Oh, oh, don't tell me, let me guess." The watcher smirked, " I know, you took it and hid it in the Kashyyyk system. Maybe... on the moon of Alaris Prime!"

"No, it isn't there either," replied the Count smugly.

"Ha! It so is!"

"Believe me, it isn't!

"Well, it's supposed to be!"

"It isn't! It's on Hoth!" snapped Count Dooku. "Just because you're a fan of George Lucas doesn't mean you know everything that is going on in this galaxy! Stop acting as if you do."

Andrew sulked at having his fan-based knowledge challenged, then his face lit up as a different thought occurred to him. "We could go to Hoth and grab the Harvester. I've always wanted to ride a tauntaun."

"I'm not going to Hoth," said Dooku firmly. He pulled the edges of his robe around him as if he could already feel the freezing winds of the icy planet. "The Harvester can stay where it is. I've got my rheumatoid arthritis to think of."

"You haven't got rheumatoid arthritis," Buffy pointed out.

"Only because I avoid places like Hoth," Dooku replied. He shuddered theatrically. "That planet is not for me. I'm far too old to go traipsing about in all that snow."

Mace Windu was looking worried. "Is this Force Harvester idea even wise?" he asked. If Dooku or Andrew heard him they gave no sign.

"You can stay inside the ship," Andrew told Dooku. "If you tell us where it is, me and Quin will go out and get it. We'll ride a tauntuan together. Quin can control it with his mind power and I'll sit behind him and hold on. It'll be romantic." He settled back and gave Quin a shy look.

The Kiffar knight tensed, the only sign of movement a twitch in his face, his mind filled with horrifying images the young Watcher painted. Finally, he gulped, "I'm a Jedi. We aren't allowed romantic rides through the snow."

Andrew's mouth turned downwards.

Despite his misgivings regarding unearthing a Sith super-weapon, Obi-Wan couldn't help teasing his friend. "Quin, for the sake of the Count's arthritis, you really must venture out into the snow with Andrew.

The Kiffar narrowed his eyes, clearly signaling 'I'll get you back for this.'

Andrew's face brightened once again. "If I was captured by a wampa, dragged into its cave, and hung upside down ready to be eaten. Obi-Wan could appear and rescue me."

"Oh yes," Quin smirked. He much preferred this new daydream of Andrew's. "Obi-Wan can go with you to Hoth. I remember how he flew to the rescue that time when you were abducted by the sex slavers. Pick Obi-Wan for your companion. He'd love to go to Hoth and cuddle up on the back of a tuantuan."

Andrew gazed wistfully at Obi-Wan for a moment, before shaking his head. "No, he prefers being with Buffy. And she needs him."

Quin's grin became wider. Obi-Wan experienced a tinge of un-Jedi like panic as he realized that Yoda and Mace had allowed themselves to purposely fade into the background. No doubt the masters were quietly watching the Jedi-Scooby gang, to assess what they got up to behind closed doors. This wasn't good. If the masters picked up on a relationship between him and Buffy they'd recall them both back to the Temple, split them up, and investigate. He needed to deflect their attention.

"Of course, she needs me," Obi-Wan replied, "Buffy has a real talent for finding trouble. It's my job to get her out of it."

"Hey!" Buffy protested, not happy at having her name besmirched and thrown under the speeder bus for distraction. "Not fair. Trouble totally finds me."

"That's what I said."

"No, you didn't. You said I find trouble. As if I purposely go out looking for it."

"Yes, you do. Trips to The Korriban Club, meeting Nightsisters and Dathomirian Zabracks, hunting Trogs in the Lower Levels, hanging around with bounty hunters... Need I go on?" asked Obi-Wan.

"Wait! I don't hang around with bounty hunters!" Buffy looked affronted by the suggestion. The Jedi next to her raised an accusing eyebrow, silently reminding her of a guy called Jay who'd gone on to dangle her from off his belt.

Buffy, bit her lip before saying, "Hmm, guess I need to plead the fifth on that one."

There was warm amusement rolling off Obi-Wan, although he maintained his reproving expression. She guessed the sour look was for Yoda and Nick's benefit. Those two always put a downer on every party.

Turning her attention to Andrew, she made a suggestion. "If you go to Hoth, why not take Rayne along with you?" Ubi must be rubbing off on her. She was turning into a negotiator. "I bet Rayne would like to go on romantic wampa rides with you."

Andrew slanted another shy look at the Kiffar. It was obvious that he was deep in the throes of a crush. "It's tauntaun rides and Rayne's just a friend."

The Kiffar shuffled away and folded his arms. "So am I. A friend! Keep thinking of me like that." He frowned when he saw Andrew gazing at his biceps in admiration.

Yoda had seen enough. Lifting his gimmer stick, he waved it at Andrew. "Attachments, not the Jedi way. Attempt to seduce Jedi knights, you should not."

Andrew gave Buffy a sullen look and fell into a hard sulk.

Pointing his stick at Obi-Wan, and sending the young knight into another panic, Yoda rebuked, "Serious, the mind of a Jedi should be."

Obi-Wan dropped his eyes to the floor, feeling suitably embarrassed, chastised, and relieved all at the same time.

Yoda continued, "A dangerous weapon to the whole galaxy, the Dark Reaper is." His ears flattened to the side of his head as he narrowed his eyes at Andrew. "A child's plaything, this is not!"

"I only want it for ideas so I can make my own Force Sucker-Outer," Andrew argued back.

"Foolish, you are. Kill many you will," Yoda stated. As head of the Jedi Order, he was used to dealing with more respectful youngsters. The chaos that reigned at Jedi-Scooby meetings was quite unnerving. |Shaking his head at Buffy's dark apprentice he continued, "Bring the Dark Reaper to the Temple, you will not!

"Both the Dark Reaper and the Force Harvester are far too dangerous to unearth simply for ideas," scolded Mace Windu, concerned at Andrew's stubbornness. "Those things suck the life Force out of everything within range. I don't think you realize how dangerous this Sith super-weapon truly is."

"Nah, honest, it won't be a problem," Andrew continued with relentless optimism. He paused, eyes widening as a great idea came into his head. "Buffy!" He bounced up and down in his seat, causing Dooku and Quin to quickly place their mugs on the table. "I've got the coolest idea for a Force Sucker-Outer! Do you remember how they used to suck up the ghosts in Ghostbusters? Remember, they had traps and those proton backpacks?"

"Er, yeah," Buffy admitted cautiously. Not sure if it was a wise agreeing to anything at this stage. Obi-Wan was bombarding her with warnings down their bond and even Yoda had gone a sickly shade of green.

Her Watcher sprang to his feet and began pacing in front of the couch. "If I get the Harvester and dismantle it, I could rig up a couple of de-materializer type packs that you and Obi-Wan can wear on your backs." Andrew mimicked firing a blaster at an invisible ghost. He made an odd sucking noise with his mouth and bounced excitedly. "You and Obi-Wan could hunt out the ghost, point your Dark Reaper at it, and suck up the ghost between you."

"Don't imagine for a moment that I'll volunteer to test this weapon for you," said Obi-Wan. "I know how many times you electrocuted Buffy while trying to build a lightsaber. Anyone who tests one of your backpacks will probably find themselves sucked inside, rather than the ghost."

Andrew waved away his concerns. "I'm a Watcher. It's my job to find ways to kill demons or, in this case, Force ghosts. That's why I want to get my hands on the Force Harvester and the Dark Reaper."

"I wouldn't hold your breath," Count Dooku said darkly. "Despite having researched this Force Harvester extensively over the years," Yoda and Mace exchanged a worried look, "I've no idea exactly where on Hoth it's buried." He eyed Andrew sourly. "We could be there for years, digging through all that snow. Or rather YOU could be there for years. I'm not going."

"The Count is right, Andrew," said Buffy. "This isn't a case of looking for an artifact buried somewhere in Sunnydale. Hoth is a big planet. Not that I know anything about Hoth, but it's bound to be a big planet compared to Sunnydale. I'm also thinking this Grim Reaper thing is sounding way too dangerous."
She saw the familiar stubborn scowl and tried a different tactic. "If Casper the Unfriendly ghost had appeared back in Sunnydale would the man in tweed have suggested using a nuclear weapon on it? No, he wouldn't. No Andrew, I know why you wanna go to Hoth, but we need to find something more subtle. Why don't you ask Mother Ta'la if she knows of a good banishing ritual we can use?"

"You mean something along the lines of a blood sacrifice, the innards of our enemies, and a complex archaic ritual?" Andrew brightened, sulk forgotten as his brain rattled off down a new yet familiar track. Around him, everyone but Buffy grimaced in distaste.

"Yeah, that sounds more like our thing. Research it and come back to me." Catastrophe now averted, Buffy gave the masters and the Jedi-Scoobies one of her sunny smiles. "Is there any more bad news we should know about? Only we've booked on a shuttle going to the Lake country and it's leaving soon. Padme helped us get a late booking in this cute honeymoon villa overlooking the lake. I can't wait to check out my room. We're both gonna have an early night so we're bright and fresh for hitting the shoe outlets first thing in the morning." She smiled up at the red-haired Jedi standing next too her. "Obi-Wan's gonna need plenty of energy for everything I've got planned for him."

Obi-Wan didn't flick as much as an eyelid. He stared stonily ahead of him, not daring to let his thoughts venture down any non-Jedi pathways.

"Going into shoe shops, you should not," Yoda remarked waspishly after a moment. "Vampires, you are there to hunt."

Buffy rolled her eyes. "And where's there a better place to find information on the crystal caverns than inside a shoe shop? Honestly, you Jedi have no idea of where to go to find the best gossip. Ubi was just the same. He doubted me when I told him I was getting my hair done, but I was the one who found out all the information he couldn't."

Yoda sucked in his cheeks, wanting to argue, but unable to. He'd never been into a shoe shop or a beauty parlor. As long as the tufts of hair on his head were neatly combed and pressed into place with a lick of spit he considered himself good to go.

Unable to subdue the Slayer with his gems of wisdom he looked to Kenobi. He noted once again the young knight stood overly close to the young woman. Why? Was he protecting her? Controlling her? Or offering support?
Hmm, Interesting.
Closing his eyes, the small green master reached out into the Force. Using his abilities to search out, through the currents that flowed through the living Force and onwards. He'd found that over the centuries seeing far into the future had become more and more difficult. Now, the hints he saw brought both sadness and new hope. All was not lost to darkness.

"Obi-Wan, strong in the Force, you have become, hmm? Allow yourself to be distracted by others, you should not. To grave danger, that pathway leads."

Buffy gave a small snort of ridicule. She'd unwrapped better one-liners from cheap fortune cookies.

Although there was no way he could have heard her, Yoda's ancient eyes turned to the Slayer. "You too, Slayer. Darkness shrouds you. Great personal pain for you, the future holds. Strong, you must be, if you wish to prevail and stay in the Light."

And to Buffy's surprise, his voice held a note of genuine sadness.

…...

A/N;
Beta by blackhat

Hope you liked that one.

The idea of using the Death Reaper to rip ghosts out the Force came from the novel 'Kenobi'. It was cited as the reason he never went near any Sith as a ghost. (Missed out on some fun there Force Ghost Kenobi, you could have leaped out on Vader when he was relaxing in his meditation chamber or sneaked up behind Sid and said, 'Boo!')

As always, Musey shouted 'Ooooohhhh! I like that!' and wouldn't shut up about it until I wrote it. She also informed me that Count Dooku was worried about his rheumatoid arthritis and suggested we put the Harvester on Hoth.
Honestly, it's best not to argue with her.

Chapter title from YouTube. The things I do for this fanfic. I am getting a bad reputation. Okay, I probably already had one but that isn't the point.

As usual, reviews are most welcome. Thanks to those who take the time to do so.