The Truth in the Transformation

2 Ano-Cycles Later

For almost a deca-cycle now Axletron had felt…off, antsy even, in his own plating. He'd grown even taller, taller than his mother and Echo too. He was 16 ano-cycles old now. After that first trip with Ultra Magnus, he'd been allowed to tag along on others, though never out of his grandbot's or mother's sight and never outside the commonwealth.

For now, they'd returned to Iacon. It seemed some kind of transmission had been intercepted from the Decepticons. The cons had continued attacking the borders, spreading out and dragging Ultra Magnus further and further from Cybertron for deca-cycles at a time. The council had taken on more responsibilities as a result, bots filtering out duties between areas of expertise. The investigation into the sleeper bots was still going too, with Blurr deep undercover and Mirage filtering his way through the ranks of bots on base. StunGun had somehow managed to purge his memories of the Decepticon information. He'd been locked in a cell, alone at the time so it couldn't have been an outside force. His memory systems had basically been reset. They lost everything, but so did he. A whole life wiped out…

Axletron's own training had continued to progress as well, expanding to include Metallikato, Tekkaido and Circuit-Su from Jazz, Crystalocution from Mirage, and Pit-fighting and Jet Judo from Sideswipe and Sunstreaker! The last two had been especially cool to learn, though it had been an uphill fight convincing Alpha Trion and Ultra Magnus to allow it. His mom had actually been supportive, always encouraging him to use any and all tactics to get the upper hand in a fight. Spoken like a true minibot warrior.

But he hadn't been progressing alone. Echo had also blossomed into a capable and skilled Autobot, learning under Jazz and WarPath at the Cyber-Ninja Corps as well as the Academy, training to join the Elite Guard. She was well-liked, her circle of friends growing wider each day, but she never lacked time for her best friend.

Today, they were practicing their sneak attacks, hiding in the rafters and shadows of the dojo, waiting for the perfect opportunity to strike and disappear again. Axletron had the lead by 1 and was swiftly moving across the room's main beam, when he heard the sharp snap of Echo's stun blaster fire ringing through their air.

As he flipped back off the beam, avoiding Echo's shot, something seemed to click inside of his processor. In a whirl of metal and wires, gone was a bot and there, hovering in the middle of the training room, was a small red spacecraft.

Axletron had transformed. He'd actually transformed! And his alt-form was a jet! He could fly. Axletron could FLY!

His spark swelled with a sudden joy, lighter than ever before. Suddenly he felt so free, full of energy and power. While everything told him to fly outside, to shoot off into the sky, he limited himself to a few loops around the beams of the dojo before transforming to land in front of Echo, grinning so wide his faceplate felt like it would split in half! But that smile quickly faded when he saw Echo's terrified expression. She was staring back at him like she didn't know him.

"Echo?"

She flinched and liked her derma nervously. "You…you fly. Only Cons fly…your alt mode…you look like Megatron, Axle…like a Decepticon" she whispered, avoiding optic-contact. "I-I have to go, I have to…think. I'm sorry Axle, I-"

As she ran towards the door, Axle tried to intercept her, "Echo, hold on, I'm still me! Please, let's just talk for a nanosec-"

"Just let me go Axle!" Echo shouted suddenly, "I just need a minute to think! Alone!"

With that, Echo ran out the door, leaving a stunned and hurt Axletron in her wake.

Now Axletron had figured after his first angry and fateful conversation with his mother a few ano-cycles back, that his father hadn't been a run-of-the-mill Autobot. After a while Axletron had figured out his father was tall, because he was very tall after all, much taller than his minibot mother, but other Autobots were tall, like Ultra Magnus. Axletron simply figured his father had been a large bot. It was also true that he had a bit more mass to him…more armor, heavier peds, wide shoulders. But minibots were pretty solidly built, and if his father was a military build than it wouldn't be too much of a stretch. The hardest thing to explain away was his helm and the sharper angles of his limbs. He wasn't a walking mass of spikes, but he was definitely missing the curvier, more rounded shapes of an Autobot alt mode.

Axletron could only look as his reflection with growing horror. As he took in his new turbines and wings, he felt a horrible rush of anger flood inside him. Was this why he was a secret? Why everybot was so tight lipped about his father!? Who was his father that Axletron would inherit this…this…Decepticon-ish alt-mode!? As his throat blocked with confused fury, he transformed back into his bi-pedal mode and after a final look at his reflection, headed for the door.

Without thought, Axletron headed for Kup's office, keeping out of sight. His mother always became quiet around the issue of his father, and while Axletron didn't know why, he could recognize that it hurt the mini to think about it. He wouldn't risk hurting his mother with his own confusion again, not until he knew the whole story and if there was one bot that had to know the truth, it was Kup.

Now, Kup's office was conveniently located at a corner of the main Autobot administration building. He had insisted on having two doors, so as never to be trapped without another way out of the room. Of course, when he'd planned that, he hadn't exactly counted on being ambushed by his honorary grandson. He'd been in the middle of filing reports when Axletron burst into his office and came to a stop directly in front of the older Autobot's desk.

Without beating around the bush and offering Kup no chance to get a word in, Axletron bluntly asked, "Who's my father?"

The old military bot was no stranger to being caught off guard, but even this seemingly random topic threw the old bot for a loop. All Kup could do was blink at him and ask, "What?"

"Who is my father?" Axletron asked again.

The wheels in Kup's processor seemed to have stopped working. He stuttered to answer, unwittingly letting his cy-gar fall out of his mouth. "What in the name of Primus are you talking about!?" he asked, picking it back up and turning it off. Old habits die hard.

"My father Kup!" Axle shouted back, servos fisting in frustration, "Who was he!?"

"Haven't we done this song and dance before? Don't think that just cause you're older the result will be different!" Kup groused.

"I transformed."

"…into what?"

"Some kind of military spacecraft."

"You can fly?"

"Yes." Axletron replied softly, losing steam as his worries flooded to the surface, "And Autobots don't fly. So what am I?"

"Kid" Kup said softly, rising from his desk, "Your alt-mode doesn't mean anything, you're still you."

"Kup, please!" Axletron pleaded, clutching at his mentor, trying to keep Kup from bolting to the door he couldn't help but shoot a desperate look at. "I need to know the truth."

"Did it ever occur to you kid, that maybe the truth would be better left unsaid?" Kup growled, chomping on his shut down cy-gar, even as his spark screamed for the calming chemicals. He tried to pull away. He'd never wanted to get away from something faster. Even meeting Galvatron hadn't felt like a stone had been dropped into his energon processor. With a hard tug he managed to escape the sparkling's grip and headed for the door.

"It shouldn't matter if the truth hurts or is hard…it's still the truth and it's what should be said…" Axletron protested, hounding Kup with sure steps. Rushing past the old bot, he blocked his mentor's exit with his larger frame, trapping them both in the room.

Kup growled at the bot. Axletron was already as tall as him. "Kid-!"

"I need to know Kup!"

"Then go ask your mother!" Kup yelled, turning on his heel and heading towards his second door.

An instant later, Axle was striding beside, him, arms out in appeal. "I've tried! He won't talk about it!"

"Then I won't either!" Kup barked almost to the door.

Before he could get it open, Axletron's servo shammed it shut. "…Please Kup…this is important to me…" he pleaded. Kup had to stare at his peds. He knew if he looked up into the kid's optics, he wouldn't' be able to keep his mouth shut.

"…Stop asking kid…"He begged, shutting his optics and clenching his fists. "Stop."

"Please Kup…" Axletron implored, "I can't ask Mom…I know it hurts him to talk about it…You're the only one who can tell me…"

Looking up, Kup swallowed the sudden clump of despair in his throat. Axletron's optics burned with desperation, bright with the desire for truth. "Kup…I need to know who he is…I need to figure out who I am…Please."

Kup's resolve crumbled.

"…Fine..." Kup said mournfully, returning to his desk, but instead sitting in one of the front chairs "Just don't say I didn't warn ya…" Axletron continued standing by the wall, expectant. Sinking into his seat, Kup dropped his helm into his hands, rolling the cy-gar between his teeth as he fought back the feelings that followed the memory of that meeting all those vorns ago; that meeting where he watched the security footage of Cliffjumper getting attacked by Galvatron. "…Your father…he was Galvatron…"

Axletron's engine stalled. "…What?" he croaked. He'd hoped beyond hope it would be an Autobot, but the possibility of his father being a Decepticon had also crossed his processor, of course it had. But…even in his wildest imaginings he could never have thought Galvatron was his sire! "But…how…?"

Kup swallowed thickly. He didn't want to look up, but he dragged his gaze and look Axletron in the optic as he whispered, "…He raped your mother…"

Axletron stopped breathing. Everything seemed to slow down and stop. "…What?" Kup frowned sadly. He didn't want to say it again, but Axle cried out, "Kup!"

"He was raped! …Alright? Cliffjumper…was raped."

It was a though someone had a grip around his spark; as though Axletron was at the bottom of a frigid ocean. "…But…if that's true…he should…he should hate me…" he gasped out.

Kup flinched violently. They'd known it was a possibility when they'd first asked Cliffjumper to carry the sparkling to term, that the feelings from the rape would haunt him, and lead him to hate the bitlit. But Cliffjumper hadn't let that happen, he loved the kid, downright adored him. "No Axletron, he doesn't hate you," Kup said slowly. This sure was a mess he'd gotten himself into. Axle blinked in confusion at his name. He looked around nervously and began to back up towards the door. Kup held out his hands in a calming manner. He recognized that look. The look of total loss and confusion. The kid was going to run!

Axletron's world was crashing down around him. The youngling started breathing rapidly. The room was getting smaller. He had to get out of there. Turning on his heel he ran out of the room and down the hall. Kup called out behind him, "Axle! Wait!" but when he reached his door, the youngling was already gone. Chomping his cy-gar on, Kup punched the wall. "Slag it!" Dragging himself back to his desk, he sank into his seat and took a heavy drag of his cy-gar. "…Should've kept my big mouth shut. Cliff's going to kill me."

Axletron ran, blind to everything around him. He couldn't think. He didn't know what to do, or where to go, so he went with his instincts. Like he always did when he was at a loss, he went home to his mom.

Their house looked the same. The lights were on. Cliffjumper was home, probably getting dinner ready in the kitchen. Axletron stood on the porch, staring at the door for several klicks before he opened it with a soft click. The living room looked the same. The tables were the same. The pad-shelf was the same. Even his old stuffed animals still decorated the couch. It didn't make sense. Why did everything look normal?

As Axletron took another step into the room he knocked the side table. He heard everything go quiet in the kitchen. An instant later, Cliffjumper popped his head out to see who it was. He blinked in surprise when he saw his son. "Axle! You're home!" he greeted with a bit of delight.

"…Kup let me leave early." Axle said softly, looking at Cliffjumper like he'd never seen him before. Hundreds of thoughts were flying through his processor. His mom was still red. He was still short. He still had big horns. But everything felt different. It was like Axle was meeting a completely new bot. One that looked familiar, but that he didn't understand. Axletron was questioning everything he ever knew. Did Cliffjumper really love him? Was it all an act? Was he under orders? How could he stand to look at him?

"Alright. Dinner will be ready in a bit, ok? I made those cookies you like too! We'll have to save some for 'Jack though." the mini added with a chuckle, unaware of his son's inner turmoil. He simply turned back into the kitchen.

Axletron watched him leave with a wasted nod. Confusion flooded him. How could Cliffjumper do that…how could he care about him like that when his father had raped him? Axletron was the product of an unwanted and unwilling spark merge…he felt sick. Axletron swiftly flew to his room, pedsteps silent enough to make any ninja-bot proud.

He collapsed on his bed, leaving the light off, thoughts forming a dark cloud of misery over him. It seemed like nano-klicks, but it was several klicks later that a voice broke over the sounds of pots and pans.

"Axletron! Time for dinner!" Cliffjumper called out. He expected to hear the bot's door open and some soft ped-steps coming down the stairs, but everything remained silent. "Axle?" he tried again. He couldn't be that deeply asleep already, and it wasn't like he hadn't yelled loud enough. Covering up the plates, Cliffjumper headed upstairs. He knocked on Axletron's door. No answer. He opened up. The lights were off, but he could easily recognize the dark figure on the berth. "Axletron…?" he asked softly, opening the door a little wider, letting the light from the hallway cut through the dark of the room. "Axle? What's wrong?"

Axle was curled into a tiny ball on his bed, clutching his battle helmed head in his servos. Stepping softly, Cliffjumper made his way to his son. After a brief climb onto the overly large bed, he softly rubbed his sparkling's horns. "Come on Axletron…talk to me?"

Silence stretched out between them. Cliffjumper's concern only grew as he felt his son tremble softly. Finally, Axletron spoke. "…Did you want me…?" he asked softly. "…When you found out you were carrying me…did you actually want me?"

"…Why in the world would you ask me that?" Cliffjumper replied. When Axletron stayed silent, he slowly placed a servo on the bot's back, petting him softly, "You were never planned. No one even knew it was possible to create spark merge sparklings anymore. And when I found out I was carrying you, the situation was a bit…complicated. I'll admit there was a moment I didn't think I would be able to do it…but I made my choice back then, to have you and give it my best shot. And I have never, for one moment, regretted that decision. Because I love you. You're my metal, code and energon, you're my little spark. No matter the circumstances of your conception, I love you Axletron. You can doubt a lot of stuff, about me and everything else, but not that. Never doubt that…alright?"

As the words echoed through Axletron's audios he slowly uncurled himself. "How…? How can you love me, the way I was conceived…?" Axletron asked, voice thick and wretched.

Cliffjumper's optics flashed and he leaned back in surprise, falling silent before frowning, "You know? How?"

Axletron looked away.

"Axletron, tell me. This is important. How did you find out?"

"…I transformed today." Axletron said, chuckling sadly when he added, "I can fly….only Decepticons can fly."

"And you figured your father was a Decepticon?"

"I'd suspected, for a while." Axletron admitted, biting his lip, "I'm just so much bigger than you…sharper…"

Cliffjumper couldn't help but smirk at that last part. Suuuure, his sparkling may have grown to loom over him but he was as soft-sparked as a cloud, but he kept silent, allowing Axletron to continue. "I asked Kup. Forced it out of him really."

"So it was Kup." Cliffjumper replied sadly. At least he knew Kup probably meant well. If it had been Alpha Trion Cliff would have suspected him to trying to manipulate Axle into hating Decepticons more passionately or something.

"I-I'm a rape sparkling" Axletron sobbed, breaking into tears again, his large shoulders trembling, "I'm sorry mom!"

Cliffjumper immediately stood up, "Ok. No. That's enough of that. Come on." He grabbed Axle's servos and tugged him up off the bed, downstairs and into his office. He scanned his office regularly for spy devices and it was his most trusted space in the house. This wasn't really a conversation to have out in the open. "Sit." Cliffjumper ordered, and his son slumped sadly on a chair as Cliffjumper paced the room, activating a short range scrambler just in case.

Pushing a gust of air quickly out of his vents he turned to look at his sparkling. "It's time you learned the truth, Axletron" he declared. "What Kup told you, what you think you know, it's a lie."

Axletron's faceplate was growing pale in concern but Cliffjumper pressed on. "Your father was a Decepticon. He was Galvatron, Megatron's father. But he didn't rape me."

Thrown for another loop, Axletron could only gasp out, "What…?"

"I met Galvatron during the first war. I didn't know who he was, we didn't have images of the Decepticon leader at the time. He'd told me he was a neutral under a fake name and we became friends and eventually…more." Cliffjumper explained with a blush. "You were conceived out of love. I was already carrying when I found out who he actually was. And when I confronted him…well, I saw after that I pushed him into a corner. I was carrying his sparkling, I wouldn't go with him and the Decepticons, he couldn't protect me from the Autobots if they decided to try me for treason, so he figured he would make my conception look like rape, so I wouldn't be punished."

"You…you were in love with a Decepticon?" Axletron asked in awe, his mind suddenly filled with Echo and how he felt about her. Bright, full, happy, had his mother felt that for a Decepticon? Was what he felt for Echo love? His spark still stung at her reaction to his transformation, that fear in her optics…it broke his spark. Was that what his father felt when he found about of him? Hopeless, lost for action and ashamed?

"Decepticons, Autobots, Predicons, Stunticons, they're all just names Axletron, brands, labels. Underneath them are bots, all Cybertronian."Cliffjumper explained.

A memory of that first visit to Vehicon rushed back to Axle, the war memorial Ultra Magnus had taken him too. The names of all the sparks lost, regardless of faction. From the Well they all came and to the Well they would all return.

"I fell in love with a bot who happened to be Decepticon, and he fell in love with me despite my choice to be an Autobot." Cliffjumper said softly, tapping his own Autobot symbol. "I still love him. I was going to tell you the truth when I found him, but you were still so young, I didn't want to burden you with it."

"When you…found him?" Axletron whispered back uncertainly, "but…he's dead…" For some reason, Axletron's spark suddenly felt cold. His mother's lover was dead? What would he do if Echo was gone forever…? If he never got to see her playful smile again, if she never walked through his door with a cheery hello or begged for his treats with a pout…the world seemed to get colder.

Cliffjumper couldn't keep his smile from shining through, "He's not."

"You know where he is?"

"Yes. But I haven't been able to confirm anything in person. Can't exactly take a vacation into Decepticon territory" The mini chuckled, before turning grim. "Axletron, you're 16 ano-cycles old. Younger bots than you have fought in wars, died in battle, but you'll always be my sparkling. I'm trusting you with this now, because I don't want you to think you are anything less than my greatest treasure. I love you, and you were not a product of something as horrible as rape. And even if you were, I would still love you, because no one can meet you and not love you sweetspark."

"Mom" Axletron whined, blushing.

Cliffjumper chuckled and leaned into Axletron's side, hugging him, remembering how embarrassed he himself used to get when his parents praised him or showed extra affection. "No one else knows the truth sparklette. They all think Galvatron was a monster, and while he certainly wasn't a saint, he meant well. Somewhere in his quest for good…he lost his way."

Axletron remembered Ultra Magnus saying something similar, the first time he'd tried to find out who his father was. If his mother had loved him, he couldn't have been too bad a bot, right? Regardless, this wasn't something he could share with anyone… not even Echo. Thinking about the femme brought another flood of hurt through him. It hit him so hard he couldn't stop the tears from flowing, torn between relief at what his mother had told him and the fact that he'd lost his best friend. Stooping forward, he began to cry on his mother shoulder. "Axletron, what else is wrong? What happened?"

"Echo" Axletron sobbed, "She's afraid of me! She saw my transformation and she ran away!"

"Oh boy." Cliffjumper groaned. He'd been afraid of this. Unlike Axle, Echo has undergone the Academy's 100% anti-Con lesson plan. There were no exceptions, a con was a con, and cons flew. Ano-cycles of brainwashing couldn't exactly be flushed out overnight. "Do you want me to talk to her?" He asked softly, making Axletron still in his arms.

"Do you think it will help?" Axle whimpered.

"It doesn't hurt to try." Cliffjumper offered, "and who better to change her perspective than me?"

While Axletron's spark soared with hope, his tank also filled with dread. He'd thought Echo was special, his best friend, perhaps more…but then this. She'd turned her back on him in a spark beat and now he wasn't sure he could trust her. Knowing about him was bad enough but if she figured out his mom was in love with a Decepticon, if she grew even the slightest bit suspicious of his history... "No Mom. Thank you, but I think for now, it's better to just wait. Let things settle."

His mother continued to pet his helm for a moment before replying, "If that's what you want. But if you change your mind later, let me know ok?" He wouldn't force Axletron. He would respect his decision. At least for now.

Axletron had made his choice. Now what he knew what he truly was, he'd decided he wouldn't transform again. It was like Echo had said, only Decepticons fly. It was the most obvious tell in the world. Better to stay in bot mode then risk the extra, unwanted attention…the scared, untrusting looks. No one would know his was the son of the original Decepticon Warlord. He'd gone his whole life without transforming, no need to change that now. He wouldn't transform into that flying monstrosity again.

End Chapter 117