Shepard's breathing was labored as she fought to concentrate on anything, everything, that would keep the horrible psychosis at bay. They were running up to a big open maw leading into deep space. All that time on various treadmills had finally paid off; she felt a little winded but had plenty of faculties left to deal with the psychological problem threatening to blow up in her face.

Space was outside that hangar door, painfully visible in its vastness. She'd been in that darkness before, surrounded by stars…

She gritted her teeth, reminding herself that she'd only have to bear with it for a few moments. If she didn't look, her muscles wouldn't lock up. If she didn't think about it, she wouldn't slow down from her desperate sprint. All she had to do was make it to the geth fighter, because geth didn't use windows. She'd be in an opaque environment and could restore her increasingly shattered sense of equilibrium.

Up ahead, she watched as the ground team began climbing in. It wasn't much further…

She nearly screamed, and only a rapid slap to her gravlocks kept her from floating too far off the ground before she was anchored again. She stumbled, took a knee, forced herself back to her feet, to resume running. Up ahead, Alenko reached out and grabbed Tali as the quarian—last of the ground crew save Shepard herself floated up—towing the girl into the safety of the ship. Shepard stopped short, looking up at the docked fighter, knowing what came next. It was only through sheer force of will that she disengaged her gravlocks and pushed off.

She wanted to scream, to close her eyes and curl into a ball—the reflexive actions of a frightened creature. She fought it back, however…or tried to. She felt like the world was opening up beneath her, a hole into which she would fall and in which resided blackness and stars…

The moments of hanging in space, propelled by her own inertia nearly made her sick and only the thought that she needed to keep her helmet vomit-free kept her stomach from revolting as much as her mind was trying to. This wasn't like the Collector attack; the two events—this and that—weren't in any way comparable…

"Normandy to Shepard! I'm reading a loss of gravity! You okay over there?" Joker demanded.

"Fine," she grated out, knowing that anyone with ears would know it was a lie. She was not fine; she was so not fine…

She grabbed onto Alenko's hand as he caught her and pulled her into the ship.

"EDI's sent us rendezvous coordinates. Still…just waggle the wings or something so I know it's you."

Shepard said nothing; her teeth suddenly seemed glued together.

The geth shunted her gently into the storage space where Alenko reached out and threw an arm over her shoulders like a bandolier, dragging her back against him before looping his other arm under hers so he could knot his fingers together. It wasn't a safety harness, but the pressure was reassuring as she squeezed her eyes closed.

"Does the storage compartment have adequate room, Shepard-Captain?" Legion asked as it cued the flight protocols.

"Fine," Shepard managed, only with great difficulty. She was sweating again, and felt absolutely drenched. She felt wet and cold and terribly aware of the sense that someone was holding a handful of cotton batting against her mouth and nose which made breathing difficult.

"Major Alenko? Shepard's vitals are spiking." EDI announced.

She knew it was all in her head, the sense of trouble breathing, knew it had to do with that black maw in her mind which was at a distance only because she furiously tried to ignore it. Even the solid walls of the shuttle weren't helping. She was too aware of space all around her…

Suddenly, she couldn't breathe…and she was falling into the black—

"Shepard!"

"Legion, does this thing have an environmental suite?"

"Negative. Geth do not require them."

"Is she gonna be okay?"

"What's wrong with her?!"

"Shepard? Shepard, I need you to breathe for me," Alenko commanded, the grip he had on her compressing until she sucked breath and releasing so she could let it out. "You're okay," he said calmly, again using his grip to compress her chest. "It's just a panic attack, and it's going to go away. You just need to breathe. Focus on that and it'll go away, I promise."

She tried to make herself breathe calmly, independent of Alenko's regulating compressions, but found herself horribly, painfully aware of everyone staring at her, of the way faith in her ability to lead had begun slipping. How could it not, when she was losing it like this?

She was glad of her helmet, as it hid the tears that stung her eyes.

"Come on, Shepard," Garrus rumbled. She felt the dull clunk of his hand coming to rest on the back of her neck before he turned the gesture into a headlock, made awkward by Alenko's hold on her. "Shake it off." She could feel the rumble of his subvocals moving through her armor. The sensation persisted even after he fell silent, his talons drumming unhurriedly against her armor.

Her head hurt, her lungs hurt, and she had let them all down because she'd finally fallen apart in front of them…it was humiliating.

"Don't say that! I don't want to hear that out of your mouth ever again, you four-eyed freak!" Tali screeched. "You have no idea what you're talking about! No idea what she's been through!"

"Easy, Sparks…"

"Let go! What kind of an asshole are you?"

"Enough!" Shepard managed, half choking on the word. At the least she only sounded winded, not broken. She didn't think she could bear to hear herself sounding broken. "This isn't the time." She found herself panting hard, but the tightness in her chest had begun to loosen.

Shepard closed her eyes. She had never felt like such a liability.