Hey everyone.

Happy almost Christmas. I hope it's awesome. I know I'm looking forward to it. FINALLY one with cookie baking and shopping. Now I just need to prepare the menu for Christmas dinner and I'm golden.

Also, I was given a tiny, adorable, squishy dick for a secret santa present. So I'm pretty happy.

If Someone Cared Enough

Chapter 138: The Reality of War

The talk with Dumbledore left the group reeling, even days after the fact. The fight between Dumbledore and Grindelwald was steeped in enough awe to nearly be legend, so tremendous a battle it was. Yet the focus always revolved heavily—if not solely—on the two wizards themselves; not on any outside key players in Grindelwald's defeat. Dumbledore won; that's all anyone ever cared or spoke about.

There had been rumors that the Scamander brothers played some sort of role in bringing Grindelwald down, but even that was steeped in mystery and obscurity, Newt and Theseus sinking out of the limelight to go on and live peaceful lives. There had been a confirmed death in the beginnings of the war against the dark wizard; Leta Lestrange fell by his own hand, though talk of her having sided with Dumbledore to save everyone was largely refuted by the remaining blood purity obsessed Lestranges.

No mention was made of a maledictus though, Nagini's name not existing in any record or writing of the historic event. Her curse was misunderstood—according to Albus—many assuming that since the blood curse was evil, those under its effects must be as well. The ministry was adamant to not discuss Nagini's involvement, mainly out of fear that promoting one alleged dark creatures help in the light would lead to uprising.

Decades and centuries of bigotry had kept half-breeds and cursed creatures as second-class citizens on the grounds that they posed more danger than good to the general public. Acknowledging a maledictus's good deeds would only reopen efforts for equality that the most old fashioned and bigoted of the ministry abhorred.

"It's easier to justify one's hatred if there appears to be a factual reason for such hate," Dumbledore had told them, "Nagini proved those under her curse were just as human as you or me, and that went against everything many politicians held firm."

There was another reason Nagini bore no mention in official records. Her involvement was attached to a far greater secret, one the ministry feared revealing, kept hidden along with everything else they didn't understand. The mere mention of it brandied about in hushed whispers like a filthy taboo.

Obscurial.

"Hard to believe there was ever a person who lived so long with that condition," Renee remarked over lunch. It was worth noting that they spoke of Obscurials as people with an illness, the condition applied after the fact to the person. Most referred to those suffering its symptoms with the same dehumanizing venom one spoke of people with Lycanthropy; they weren't people, they were werewolves.

People like Credence weren't people; they were Obscruials. That's how others ignored and denied them humanity.

"Newt Scamander studied those with an Obscurus briefly in his travels," Severus noted, flipping through a pilfered library book to refresh his memory, "Exclusively children; they're bodies eventually break down from the sheer force of the suppressed magic within them, usually before their tenth birthday."

"That's messed up," Mary said darkly, stabbing at a tomato on her plate, "It's twisted is what it is. Making little kids so terrified and ashamed of their own powers that they hold it in until it drives them crazy; tears them apart. How could anyone be so cruel?"

Severus picked at his salad, "You'd be surprised how much people can fear what they don't understand, what's different from them."

He absent mindedly rubbed at his arm, deftly feeling the small scar there from the first time he every levitated something in front of Tobias.

Lily leaned against Severus, taking his hand in her own under the table, "It's a miracle Credence survived so long. He's got to be, like, the eldest person in history to have had an Obscurus, right?"

"That's what it sounds like," Remus noted, "And Grindelwald managed to sink his claws into him."

"How did he even managed to convince Credence that he was Dumbledore's brother anyway?" Nesme questioned, "I mean, sure Dumbledore wasn't famous yet, but a quick bit of research would have proved that Dumbledore's parents died before Credence was born. I mean, Dumbledore's dad died in 1890. In Azkaban!"

No one commented on their mutual curiosity of what the father of such a strong proponent of the light was doing in prison, nor that it was for the alleged crime of attacking muggles.

"Credence was raised in North Americam" Renee pointed out, "In the United States. It's very likely he knew absolutely nothing about Dumbledore until they first met, and then he still wouldn't know much about the Headmaster except what Grindelwald told him."

"He was sad and lonely," Severus stated, "And looking for a family that would give him the love he never received from his adoptive mum. I imagine he would have grasped at any possible lead. Grindelwald offered him an answer, albeit a lie."

"Yeah, but he went from wanting a family to being willing to kill Dumbledore when he thought he was his brother," Nesme pointed out, confused, "Why would he want Dumbledore dead when the guy was supposedly the family he was searching for."

Severus looked at Nesme, "Because if Dumbledore had been his brother, then he would have represented everything Credence never got to have. A home, a loving parents…"

He looked around the table, "And no fear of the magic within himself."

"Heavy," Nesme murmured solemnly, looking down at her plate.

"I can't imagine how hard it must have been for Nagini and Credence to be on opposite sides of the war," Lily said sorrowfully, "The thought of fighting someone you love…it would be a matter of when, not if; there's no way to avoid facing off when you're both working so closely with the leaders of either side. Nagini must have known that they'd inevitably have to fight each other."

The others murmured their agreement.

"I don't think I'd be able to raise my wand to a friend," Renee said, staring seriously down at their lunch, "I know it would hurt me to hurt them."

Remus nodded, "Even when the guys and I were at odds with each other last year, I never wanted anything bad to happen to them."

"That's the one thing they don't warn you about when it comes to war," Severus stated, "You know you might die, you're prepared to kill or be killed. But no one ever tells you that fighting for your so called beliefs might eventually mean having to fight family…or friends."

Severus suppressed a shudder as he considered how close that fate came to being reality for him. Back then, he'd worked so hard on convincing himself that aiding Voldemort's side would mean more power, more protection for Lily; that he'd get to pull the strings behind the scenes to keep her safe. He'd been foolish to assume Lily wouldn't take an active part in opposing Voldemort. No promise Voldemort made to spare Lily would matter if he found her on the battlefield; she'd be struck down without question.

Severus had a suspicion that Voldemort probably would have made Severus kill her himself to prove his loyalty if it came to that.

Possibly realizing Severus line of thoughts, Lily gripped his hand under the table, squeezing it gently in reassurance.

"Don't dwell on what might of happened," she cooed softly, "None of that will come to pass now."

"The last muggle war really messed a lot of people up," Mary said, "My dad said his father ended up fighting against an old classmate. He'd had the guy as best man in his wedding, for Merlin's sake! And yet there he was, wearing the Nazi symbol."

"It's easier to be subjective about war, when you assume the only people you'll be fighting are strangers," Remus noted, "No one ever stops to think that someone they care about might have a different enough opinion from you to enlist in the other side's army. Some don't even put a name or face to their enemies or those they'll be killing; I doubt every one of Hitler's soldiers considered they might be killing their own Jewish neighbors."

"I hear they were spreading a ton of propaganda," Nesme revealed, "My dad said that unless you were working in the camps, most soldiers didn't actually known all that went down there. Most German citizens didn't; there were pictures and flyers advertising the camps as these happy, wonderful places. They'd showed pictures of kids laughing, women gardening. Hardly anyone knew what was really happening until so many people had already died."

Severus nodded, "I've been reading up more on Grindelwald since our talk with Albus. Gellert did the same thing. Painted his movement as some quest to end the violence of wars and bring peace between the magical and non-magical. He chose his words carefully; said it wasn't that muggles should die, but that they should be controlled for their own safety. He cited previous wars as evidence of their inability to be responsible for their own actions. He wanted his followers to believe that muggles would be happier under wizard rule."

"And he did one of hell of a good job of painting the light side as the oppressors," Lily added angrily, "He made them out to seem aggressive and totalitarian. He told people the authorities were suppressing their rights to opinions and marginalizing the magical community. From what I understand, he'd deliberately incite the rage of his followers at some of his rallies and then portray the ministries attempts to subdue their outbursts as unprovoked attacks."

Severus nodded, "At a rally in Paris, when Aurors showed up to break up the meeting, Grindelwald provoked one of his followers into attacking the Aurors. When one killed her in self-defense, Grindelwald vilified the ministry sanctioned use of the killing curse and ultimately turned more people to his cause…and that's the rally that convinced Credence to join him."

"Makes sense," Renee said, "Ministry wanted him either dead or captured for being a dangerous obscurial and Grindelwald ended up coming off as the more accepting and open side in that case."

"Didn't Scamander's sister-in-law join Grindelwald?" Mary asked.

Severus nodded grimly, "Not as a fighter mind you, she mostly just traveled with him, but her kindness made his side seem more appealing and less ruthless. She joined because Grindelwald promised that under his rule, the law against magical folk marrying muggles would be repealed."

He laughed mirthlessly, "Funny isn't it? Every law the ministry put in place to protect its people and muggles alike…Grindelwald found some way to exploit and twist for his own purposes. He successfully convinced people that the laws designed to protect everyone were causing more harm than good and that his way was better. From claiming that muggles and wizards could live in harmony if wizards were the ruling class to saying that people could marry whoever they wanted, he made his world seem like a paradise."

Severus pursed his lips in a scowl, "He just never told anyone that his paradise included complete and utter devotion to him, or that he planned to wipe out half the muggles in existence."

"Only half?" Nesme questioned.

"You can't have subservience without servants," Severus said sourly, "Sure he'd let wizards and witches pair with muggles, but it wouldn't be an equal relationship. If you married a muggle, you wouldn't be arrested, but your spouse wouldn't be your equal either; you'd essentially own them and it would be up to you to make sure they 'knew their place'."

Mary grimaced in disgust, "That's awful."

"That was Grindelwald vision for the world," Severus said, "And it's Tom's too. I know a few of his followers who boasted about how they'd have muggles girls as slaves to do their bidding…whatever they desired."

The others cringed in horror.

Severus peered shamefully at Lily from beneath his curtain of dark hair, "In the early days…I thought that joining him meant I could ensure no one would do that to you. That I could protect you that way."

Lily gave Severus a pitying smile, somehow her forgiveness more heartbreaking than anger would have been, "Sev, you wouldn't have been allowed to love me if that happened. You would have had to spend life treating me like property just to meet his ideals, only able to love me behind closed doors."

"What kind of life would that be, to hide like that?" she questioned sadly.

Severus blinked back tears, "I…I was so convinced he'd win; everyone made him seem all powerful. I thought that future was inevitable, and that if I didn't join I wouldn't be able to keep you safe."

Lily rested her head against Severus's shoulder.

"Do you think Credence though joining would protect Nagini?" Remus asked, hoping to pull Severus out of his thoughts with a distraction, "Dumbledore said they were close. Regular wizards treated Nagini like a leper while Grindelwald was promising solace to outcasts. Did Credence think Grindelwald's world would bring Nagini a better life?"

Severus shook his head, "I think it was just about finding out his past. He cared about Nagini, but I don't think anything matter more to him than finding out who his family was. Dumbledore said Nagini tried to convince Credence that who you were born as wasn't who you were as a person; Credence left her behind when he joined because she didn't feel his quest was as important as he did."

"So Credence threw her aside when she stood in his way of what he wanted," Renee said with a scowl on their face, "Sounds like she loved him more than he loved her."

"I think Credence had difficulty understanding love," Severus said, "His adoptive mother knew he was magical and raised him to hate everything about himself. I at least had my mum to encourage me to embrace my magic, but Credence had absolutely no one. On top of being abused, he was taught to fear everything about himself, as well as hate it."

Severus sighed, "He hardly knew how to love himself, so I doubt he truly understood how to love someone else. No one ever cared about him or what he wanted; he probably thought Nagini's efforts to dissuade him was her simply not caring enough about him, just like everyone else."

"Poor Nagini," Nesme cooed.

"So Dumbledore thinks the Room of Requirement's message meant that Nagini is still alive," Mary said, "Meaning we need to find her."

"And that's not taking into consideration whether she even wants to be found," Remus tacked on.

"Tell me about it," Severus groaned, "That cabin we saw clearly says seclusion. She could be very tricky to track down."

Lily tapped her chin, "The Room showed a place with snow; perhaps that's because it's currently winter where she is now."

"Or maybe it's a place that always has snow," Nesme piped up helpfully, "Either way I don't think the room would have shown us snow if it didn't want that to be a clue to her location."

Renee looked towards the windows looming high in the Great Hall, "It's winter here already and Christmas is two weeks away. We could start with seasonal places currently having winter."

"What are the odds of her being in England?" Remus asked with a wry grin.

Severus grinned back just as dryly, "I'd say with our luck…nearly zero."

"Wait are we even going to be the ones looking for her?" Nesme asked, "We can't exactly go globetrotting around during the school year."

"Well winter break is right around the corner," Severus pointed out, "We could easily look then. Besides, who else would do it?"

{page break}

Far way in the deep recesses of a quaint and hidden Goblin village, a tall dark skinned woman unrolled a scroll delivered to her by an owl. A lone phoenix feather fell from the parchment as she opened it and scanned the contents.

"You're fucking kidding me!" Simone cursed with a scowl.

I'm sure by now plenty of you have heard about Rowling allying herself with transphobic assholes and terfs recently. Some of us knew this shoe was going to drop eventually, myself included.

I want to assure you guys that I plan to continue this story to it's completion. My anger at a once beloved author being unable to live by her story's own morals of acceptance and fighting the oppression of the marginalized will not affect this fic. I realized long ago what a deeply flawed woman Rowling was, mainly when I got to college and reread my beloved childhood series and noticed things like...I don't know...magical date rape drugs being portrayed as mostly 'harmless' or humorous because it's girls using them and boys being drugged!

You all know by now thanks to the inclusion of character's like Renee (formerly called Davis) that I care deeply about transgender and non binary rights. My closest friend is non binary and their girlfriend is a transwoman, their ex wife (my other best friend) is also trans. Their happiness and safety and basic respect and dignity as human beings means the world to me and it upsets me that Rowling would use her position as a celebrity to espouse hateful and frankly ignorant claims that deny basic scientific study and evidence of gender variances. It also discounts the existence and validity of intersex people.

But you guys knew my stance already, so sorry that I ranted there. Just wanted to get that off my chest and state that my continuation of this fic is not a sign of me finding her words acceptable; I continue this story because it means a lot to me and you readers mean a lot to me. I wish to go on with the spirit of Harry Potter even if the author herself can't live by those standards of right and wrong.

Love you guys, review please.