Shepard dropped into the seat beside Adams, somewhat to his relief. He thought the world of Karin, but sometimes she really was dense as a post and arguing with her was like arguing with a brick wall. He vaguely wondered why he bothered debating with her at all, knowing her like he did. "Captain, lend a hand here," he implored.
Karin sniffed. "If you're calling for reinforcements for your argument, that should tell you everything you need to know, Greg."
"Now, now, a third party's objective viewpoint enlivens any discussion," Adams chided.
"As do a few shots of Armali whiskey," Karin retorted impishly.
Shepard grinned at this, poking her meal with her fork. "So what argument have I stumbled into?"
"We're discussing the nature of life," Adams answered.
"You didn't get that in high school?" Shepard asked innocently, but her smirk rather destroyed the effect as the mess continued filling.
Adams gave her a mock glare which was met with chuckles all around.
"We're discussing whether the geth are alive," Karin answered.
"And I'm arguing that yes, they are. That we need to break free of the idea that if it's alive it already exists and open our minds to new forms of life.
"So you believe that the geth share the same rights and liberties as any organic being?" Karin asked.
"If that geth is minding his own business, absolutely," Adams answered. "He certainly has more rights than Cerberus." He hadn't meant it as a slam at Karin or Shepard or anyone else who'd been on that Cerberus-funded Collector hunt…but it looked like Karin took it that way.
Karin's mouth twisted, her eyes narrowing. "Despite my disgust for Cerberus, they're still human."
"You think so?" Shepard asked, still shuffling her food around on her plate. She didn't look so amused by the conversation, as if the return to gravity had sapped the good humor that had, for a few moments, exposed itself. Clearly the images of Cerberus' 'enhanced' shock troops and the various experiments gone wrong encountered over the years had left her questioning this idea more and more.
"The geth are just machines," Karin responded as Tali came to stand behind her, head cocked to one side.
"Depending on your definitions, we're all machines," Adams argued back. "You punch me, I get angry. I don't think about it, I just get angry. Programming. You can wipe my hard-drive with a good bash," he tapped his head indicatively. "You can even change it if you know how. There are diseases that alter behavior." He gestured as if to say 'there you have it' before looking at Shepard.
"…genetics aren't what make us alive," Shepard answered slowly.
Adams' brows furrowed. Was it just him or did she look a bit…pale?
"It's our self-awareness, curiosity, the ability to change or—on the population level—evolve."
"Well put, Captain," Adams beamed.
Shepard did not smile back, merely twitched her shoulders.
Karin snorted. "Of course you would say that," she answered frowningly, not happy at being outvoted.
Adams began to wonder if there was something personal about this eating at Karin. Maybe it was seeing more of the field damage when they'd been fighting the geth last time. Or maybe she really was narrow-minded on this issue.
"You two are practically machines yourselves," Karin griped, sipping her drink before prodding her vegetables.
Tali shot out a hand, closing it on Karin's shoulder as if in warning.
Adams laughed, as did several other people…but the laughter abruptly began to peter out as Shepard put down her fork. Her lips tightened, as did the muscles around her eyes.
The color drained from Karin's face as she caught Shepard's expression. He imagined hers was the same look someone might wear if, in a firefight, someone turned around to shoot at an enemy only to realize he'd just shot a friend. "Oh, Shepard…"
"No, you're right," Shepard answered calmly. "I am practically a machine. I've been joking about it for years."
He remembered the joke: 'just hang me on the charging rack and I'll be ready to go by morning.'
A tingle of unease went up and down his spine. Everyone knew that Shepard had undergone some very extensive, cutting, bleeding edge surgeries to restore her mangled body after Alchera. He wasn't privy to what, but from the way the conversation had turned…it was worse than he thought.
Much worse, because Karin did know and by now she looked utterly horrified. Dr. Karin Chakwas looked like she'd just murdered someone.
Shepard got to her feet with that same neutral composure that seemed just a little too perfect. There was something dead behind her eyes, though when she spoke, she still sounded pleasant. "I'm still with Adams. You can't help where you started; what matters is where you end up."
With this, she took her plate over to Palmer, offered the cook a brief apology for not being very hungry and of having work she really did need to be doing, then left the mess.
"Doctor, how could you?" Liara asked, utterly aghast, once Shepard was gone. She didn't wait for an answer; she merely retreated to her quarters. If she could have slammed the door, she would have.
Tali patted Karin's shoulder sympathetically, but also withdrew.
A cold-custard unpleasant atmosphere began to settle in the room. Things must have been much worse with Shepard than he thought if Karin looked that upset. Or maybe Karin was simply so familiar with the idea that Shepard was machine enough for the comment to sting that she forgot how much machinery kept the Captain going…but Shepard wouldn't have that half of the thought behind Karin's words.
"I didn't mean it that way," Karin said firmly, but the upset was naked in her tone, putting her fork down and leaning her weight on one elbow.
"I know you didn't," Adams said bracingly, reaching over and patting her elbow. "I shouldn't have pulled her into our debate."
Saying it didn't help much.