Not for a moment, it had occurred to Juice that Jaeden might join the club himself. He had been convinced that the man would convince Alex to quit, but instead he seemed to support her. With mixed feelings, he stared at the leather jacket the man was wearing now. A prospect. He had became a fucking prospect.

Juice didn't dare to say how he really felt about it. He knew Alex and Jaeden would spend more time together while there had been feelings in play in the past — something they had discovered only a few weeks ago. He however tried to hide his jealousy, repeatedly telling himself that she was pregnant with his child.

"I know her, Juice," Jaeden told him one night. Most of his brothers had already taken a girl to their rooms. Alex was behind the bar while her so-called brother sat next to him, doing nothing.

He was barely a prospect. Since he was a fucking commando, he didn't have to earn anyone's respect. He saw it frustrated Alex too, yet she still seemed to be happy to have her best friend around.

"I can't just tell her what to do. I need arguments, I need to offer alternatives — I have to be able to have a discussion. And I can only do that if I know something about this life," he explained, drinking from his glass of coke. He hadn't been very happy with Alex's excuse for her soberness, but he kept up appearances. "And believe me, having me around will also encourage her to act less impulsively. She wants to prove that she isn't reckless."

Juice just nodded, swallowing a sigh. All very well — but it meant his pregnant girl was still in a gang. Luckily, the end of her prospect period was coming close, even though it also meant that she would get more responsibilities. Within two days, she would even go to her first gun meeting. It wasn't a very risky undertaking, but it felt like she was about to step into the mud without ever being able to clean her foot.

His worries about Alex and the baby weren't the only thoughts keeping him from sleep at night. Although the idea that she would soon reveal her secret was a relief, it also caused a similar amount of stress. Some nights he woke up in sweat because the others were calling him a traitor for keeping Alex's real identity to himself. The only thing that helped him go through it, was the fact that Kozik knew about this too. He wasn't completely on his own — and yet, he feared the outcome; the consequences for him and for Alex. Would they show understanding, or would they send her away? And what was he supposed to do when she was excommunicated? She always wanted him to stay with the club, but things were different now he would have a kid to care for.

There was also a third possibility that was recently plaguing him. What if they did patch her in? What if they were so impressed by her that they decided to give her a chance, as long as the outside world wouldn't know that she was a woman? Or maybe they would even act like she was a transgender? A kid wouldn't keep her away from the club, but what would happen to their little one if both of its parents were in a gang? All other kids had at least one normal parent. He however knew what Alex would say; she would state that it wasn't her responsibility alone; she would say that they were a modern family and that he could also be the one leaving the club to be a father that would only do the club a favor now and then.

He bit the inside of his cheek, wondering if it was something he would want. He loved the club, but deep down he knew his fear of being alone had always been one of the main reasons to stay. He was more sensitive than the other guys and the past months a lot of decisions had been made with which he felt uncomfortable. Maybe... maybe he had never really fitted in.

All doubts and questions called up a headache. He just had to wait and see how things would go, there was no point in coming up with all these scenarios. Getting up, he walked over to the bar and slipped his arms around Alex's waist.

"I dismiss you of any further tasks tonight," he muttered while his lips ghosted across her neck. His hands moved across her back and he pulled her close. "Although you do have one more job to do. In the bedroom."

Alex looked up to him, a hungry look in her eyes. Her hand glided in his and they headed to the exit.

In the dusk of their bedroom, Juice finally managed to let go of his thoughts and to surrender to an urge that was just as fierce as the longing to protect Alex and their baby.

Alex just wanted to get into the black van when she felt a hand on her shoulder. She was turned around and pressed against the vehicle. Juice's hand glided up across her neck and he gave her a hard kiss. That some of their brothers were able to see it, didn't seem to bother him.

"Be careful," he said. "You never know if..."

"Juice..." She cupped his jaw with her hand. "I will be fine. Nothing's gonna happen to me. This is just a simple run."

Once more she kissed him softly, then she squeezed his shoulder and sat down behind the wheel. Excitedly, her fingers drummed against the wheel. Finally she was moving forward. Today she would meet one of the club's business partners — other than the Mayans. It was a relatively new motorclub that would distribute their guns to another part of the country. There were whispers that their members mainly had a South European background and that there were ties to the Italian mob. It did made her a bit skeptical — doing business with the mob instead of a cartel didn't sound like progress — but she knew Jax wanted to quit the whole gun business and this was probably the best way to get out of it.

When the rumbling of three bikes flared up, Alex started the van and drove past them. Chibs was in front of her, Happy and Greg would ride behind her. Giving a swing to the volume control, she relaxed while following Chibs to the place where they would meet with their business partner.

Fifty minutes later she parked the car in an abandoned hangar. About thirty feet from her, six men were already waiting. After a nod from Chibs she got out of the car. Like every time she was about to meet new people she was a little nervous, afraid they would see through her disguise. Especially now her body was changing due to her pregnancy. Alex kept her distance. Her instructions had been clear; she had to stay in the background, her mouth shut. All she had to do was watch. For her, this was nothing but a teachable moment.

And so, that was what Alex did. In silence she helped the others to unload the van. Everything seemed to go well; the men looked satisfied after looking at the contents.

And then, things got messy.

Suddenly an order was shouted, and the next moment cops swarmed the place. Alex was rooted to the spot. By reflex, her hand shot to her gun. However, shooting at a cop while she knew she was one of the bad guys, wasn't as easy as shooting criminals.

Chibs pushed her hand away and shoved her towards the car.

"Don't be stupid," he grunted. "Gun trade will give us a couple of months, if you kill a cop you'll never see daylight again."

Alex lowered her hand. With growing panic, she watched the cops come closer while they were shouting orders. It was over, she realized. Defeated, she dropped her gun on the ground, raising her hands when they told her to.

Her SAMCRO journey had come to an end.

The realization hit her like a truck. Her adventure was over — right before she had been able to get her patch. Just like her brother. For the first time she had been involved in an arms deal, and exactly this time, someone had ratted them out.

She could only hope they wouldn't think that she was the rat.

However, she didn't allow a lot of hope; the moment they found out she was a woman, they would tie it to the possibility of being an undercover agent. And even if Juice claimed otherwise, she doubted they would listen to him.

It was too easy to make her take the blame. And Jax was clever enough to see that too.