Author's Notes: I feel much better now about some things. Going to be positive and concentrated moving forward. I am an artist and I create for myself. I have to be confident in my choices that I make or else the art suffers. Pretty sure if I had these same fans back when I first started this story and I added Selena, I would've gotten at least one person saying, "Ew, Selena, what an idiot. Dumb writer. Stop writing."

I'm glad back then I stuck true to my vision and what I wanted and had faith that in the end everything would wrap up together. I need to do that now and have faith that everything that I have planned will come together in the end.

The events I had planned upcoming was supposed to be one chapter… but this conversation in the beginning of the chapter expanded and expanded until it could not be ignored and was too long to really add the other stuff I wanted to do, so this chapter is being split into two. Which, honestly, actually works better, because having two seriously heavy chapters back to back probably wouldn't work out. I'm sure you guys aren't fond of filler, but at the same time, at least you guys are getting a relatively regular update schedule now, so it's not like "oh great, a filler chapter, now I gotta wait either two weeks or six months for the next one".

Also, I re-ordered the plan of what I wanted to do and revealed some secrets (that were supposed to be revealed later) in this chapter to throw everyone a bone as an apology for having this be a mostly filler chapter.

Chapter 157:

The Turning Point

I felt my head swimming as I struggled to focus on any one train of thought. Random scenes flashed in my mind as the fragments of my consciousness began to piece together.

I watched Jill get slammed into the ground in front of me by Ashnard's sword. I felt the desperation in my heart, hoping she would live. How long ago that was… five years? Has it been six years since I arrived at this world? I'll be turning twenty-four soon.

I felt my mind shift to the night in the canyon. I saw myself laying down on the ground, exhausted after running from Crimea for so long. I saw the stars in the night sky. I felt the panic as I remembered this was the exact area of the trap I set. How vain was I to think I could have out-predicted and out-maneuvered the enemy by that many steps. If it wasn't for the Black Knight and his warp powder, I would have gotten a lot worse than a few burn scars in random places on my body.

I felt my mind shift to the battle in Nevassa and how I thought I lost Nino. I saw her laying on the ground, seemingly lifeless as blood pooled around her body. Nino… was like a little sister to me. For better or worse, she was someone I never wanted to see cry ever again. She grew up with the Fang. All she has known is death and battle, and yet somehow she continues to smile widely and warmly. I… should have leaned on her more. Let her infectious energy inspire me to do better… to do what was right, instead of what my bitter heart was driving me to do.

My mind finally focused enough that I stirred gently in the bed. I heard a sound come from around me and a scurrying, as if someone realized I was coming to consciousness. I tried to focus on what my mind was trying to show me.

I remembered sitting on a bench in Oliver's mansion, as Elincia was asking me about how the citizenry worked.

I remember sitting in the room of an inn during the time of the Rebel Alliance as Micaiah and I talked about my past.

I remember sitting in classes with Matthew, honing his skill to become a better Spymaster General… a better person than I was.

I remember talking with Ike during the Crimean Revolution, feeling like family.

I remember… spending all this time. With these people… with these people that I once thought were game characters. With these… characters. With these people. These people…

With my friends.

My friends… that I turned my back on. My friends who cared about me and genuinely worried about me, and I chose to walk alone because of some damn self-inflicted notion that I could not be helped. I sacrificed everything I could because I cared about them and loved them, but I never stopped to think how much my sacrifices I was doing for their own good was actually hurting them. They cared about me. They all cared about me.

… and now I think about that fire in the canyon. What kind of monster am I? What kind of monster do they think I am? I turned against every single one of them in that arena. I had to. I have unfinished business. I need to finish my mission before anyone further from either nation dies. Pelleas being here on the frontlines only continues to confirm my suspicion.

… but I will not do this alone. I'm no longer the Spymaster General. I no longer hold allegiance to either nation. I will forge forward doing what is right for everyone. That first step starts today…

"Yes, sir, I saw him stirring. I think he's recovering."

I cracked my eye open to see brightness in the room. I recoiled in pain and closed my eye again.

"Well, you're back to the land of the conscious," I heard a strong, yet warm and friendly voice say.

"… Commander Ike?" I asked.

"Glad to see you still remember who I am," he said. I heard him take a seat next to me.

"Commander, I'm… I'm sorry. I turned my back on you. I turned my back on—"

"Please, John, stop. I don't envy what you went through. I don't envy your position. You know more than most, if not everyone else, in this camp. You have shown an inner strength that have guided you along what you felt was right. I can respect someone who does that. If I had your talents and knew what you knew, I probably would have done the same thing," he said.

"Is that why…" I began, unsure of what to say.

"Why what?" he asked.

"Elincia told me you stepped down from being a noble in her court, even though she really appreciated your help there. Is that why you stepped down?" I asked.

"All that fancy stuff is not for me. I can't understand any of it. I'm a simple person and I just want to do what's right for everyone. I fight for those who cannot fight for themselves. In that regard, we both are the same. Why we opposed each other… was because we saw the same thing in two different ways," he said.

"I shouldn't have turned my sword on you. I should never have turned my magic on you. Commander, I… you gave me a home. You made me feel welcome. When I first came here, I gave some crazy story that would have had many thinking I was crazy. But you and your father took me in, welcomed me, made me one of your own. I felt like family. I felt like I betrayed you all. I still feel like I betrayed you. Ike, I…" I said.

"What's in the past is in the past. What you do with that guilt and how you walk forward is a measure of your character, John. We can only choose what we do next. Nobody is perfect. I made a mistake when I saw you for those diplomatic meetings and turned a cold shoulder to you, instead of reaching for a hand of friendship and understanding. I admit I felt betrayed seeing you as a Daein general. Funny enough, out of everyone in the Mercenaries, it was Soren who pulled me aside to talk to me about it. He impressed upon me that he knew you have always had the best intentions for everyone at heart. The road to villainy may be paved with good intentions, but he told me to have faith that you wouldn't fall down that road. I… I'm not good with words, John. You know this. That's why I'm here. To speak without preparation or reservation. Honestly and upfront. Just as you are doing with me," he said, before stopping.

"Ike… you… you're so much better than the character I knew. My knowledge of you did you no justice. You really truly are like a hero. I'm… I'm really glad I actually got to meet you, get to know you… fight alongside you," I said with a smile. I carefully opened my eyes and let my pupils adjust.

"It has been a long time since you arrived. I've watched you grow and evolve in ability and as a person, but you have never changed at your core. I will admit, there is a lot you have to answer for. You are not blameless or forgiven for Death Valley by any stretch of the imagination," he warned.

"I realize that. My weakness and desperation has created havoc and hatred, but… it also has created unity between Daein and Crimea. That was my goal. People think I was being depressing or self-depreciating when I say I wanted to be the darkness so everyone could be the light. That wasn't me trying to put myself down. That was me understanding what needed to be done. I doubt I will ever be forgiven for what I had done, but… if that inferno burned off the racism and hatred the old Crimea had… and gave both the new Crimea and the new Daein a common enemy that united them, then I can say I did my job and I am satisfied. That's all I ever wanted… to see Crimea and Daein unite in solidarity. To have their citizens see their similarities rather than their differences. If I had to create artificial similarities between the two nations through my own actions, then so be it," I said.

"… and that is something I find myself struggling to forgive you for."

I paused as I heard a voice behind the curtain. Ike turned to the curtain as well.

"General Selena?" I asked.

"Goodness, John, can you drop the formality for once?" she asked.

"She's… still recovering from what you did to her in the arena," Ike explained.

"Selena? No, no… are you okay?" I asked.

"You mean, aside from you shattering a couple of my bones and giving me a terrible concussion when you threw me into the wall? Yes, John, I'm fine. Goodness, that fight reminded me that I'm not as young as I thought," she said, half-jokingly.

"I'm sorry," I said.

"I know you had no intention of actually doing that. Still, you overcame your inhibitions and did what you needed to do to win. I… I'm proud of you. I'm proud to say you were once my student," she said. "If my younger self could have seen what you are now, she would look up to and idolize you. You are the very ideal that I had strived to become in my endless training and hard work."

"That… means a lot, coming from you, Selena."

"It is truly amusing sometimes how fate works, John. Just when I was to be condemned, you come in and give me a second chance. You took the torch from me and finished the journey that I had started. I would never have guessed that of all the people I met, you would be the one… but I suppose Ike never imagined that the quirky archer he picked up would end up being this symbol of unity for the two nations."

"It's not quite over yet, Selena," I warned.

"No, you're right, but you took the first steps forward," she replied. "I struggle to forgive your deeds, but… I can understand what you did. I cannot condone what you have done, though. That way of thinking and acting is what gave King Ashnard his power and what drove him to commit the crimes he did. Like Ike said, the road to darkness is paved with good intentions and lined with kind acts along the way. I just hope you do not go anywhere near the route he took."

"… Selena, if I do go too far, will you rein me in? Will you pull me aside and tell me? Even if I refuse to listen, will you at least try? I… want to rely on my friends more. I need to lean on my friends more. I should have before, but now I want to make an honest effort to include everyone," I said.

"I will and I will do it gladly," she replied.

"You may not be my teacher anymore, but that doesn't mean I can't still learn from you," I said.

"No longer being your teacher doesn't mean you have to stop learning from me, John. It just means now you and I will be learning new things together. You might learn something from me and I might learn something from you. Together, all of us will work toward a brighter future, not just for Daein but for all of Tellius," she replied.

"That's the kind of thing I want to hear. That's the kind of attitude I expected Daein's leadership to have when I heard you were all in charge. How we ended up here is what confuses me," Ike said.

"Well, I have my suspicions," I said.

"… as expected of the former Spymaster General," I heard Selena comment. I didn't get to say anything more as I saw four people walk into my section of the area almost in succession, as if they all met each other on the way here.

"Uh… General Micaiah. General Nino. Queen Elincia. General Matthew. To what do I owe the pleasure?" I asked.

"There you go again with that formality. Can you not recognize when friends are here because they care about you?" Selena asked. "They're here because they care about you. As a person. As a friend."

"Yes, please, John, can we speak just as people? That is what we did during most of that dream sequence," Micaiah asked.

"… dream sequence? You all said you would explain that," Matthew said.

"We all can talk about it after this," Micaiah said. "It would be nice to reminisce on a time where we dropped our titles in our armies and our allegiances to our nations."

"… and to ally with those not of your world anymore."

I saw every single one of them jump. I looked up at the sky.

"Jay, you really have to stop scaring people like that."

"Oh, so, she got everyone?" I heard Selena ask. I looked to see everyone nod.

"You do realize she can't see any of you nod, right?" I asked.

"Oh, right," Elincia replied meekly.

"Wait… so all of you can hear her now?" I asked.

"Yes. We all worked with her and your Rockie Talkies to coordinate the protest," Elincia explained.

"Rockie Talkies?" I asked. What kind of name was that?

"Those rocks you used to speak to everyone magically," Micaiah said. I thought for a second and remembered those rocks I came up with to communicate with the generals.

"Oh! You named them that? That had to be Jay," I said.

"Guilty as charged."

"Big bro…" Nino said quietly. I smiled at her.

"Told you I would come back," I said in what I hoped was a cheering voice. She ran over to me and hugged me and buried her head in my shoulder as she started crying. I hugged her back and slowly patted her on her head.

"We… really thought you were gone," Elincia said.

"Death has a funny way of not sticking," I remarked.

"Still, it would be wise not to tease the afterlife that many times," Micaiah said.

"General… John? John?" Matthew said.

"Oh, Matthew, it's fine. I'm just me now," I said. I sighed as I realize what must be going through his mind. "I'm sure you have a lot to say to me and you have probably had to deal with the aftermath of the contradictory nature of what I taught and what I did. I'm… sorry you had to pick up that slack and that mess. Had I known I was going to be in that kind of situation, I would never have left you such a storm to deal with."

"Why?" he asked. "You did everything contrary to what you taught us! Why?"

I sighed as I leaned back on the bed, disentangling myself from the no longer crying Nino. She leaned back and wiped her eyes before sitting down on a chair. I stared at the ceiling for a few seconds trying to formulate my answer.

"You are the next generation, Matthew. I made many mistakes along the way. I am a flawed person. I don't want you to be me. I want you to be better than me. I don't want you to have to resort to flaws and mistakes and darkness to do what is right and to do your job. Everything that has gone wrong has gone wrong because I killed my conscience to do my job. I made many critical errors. No one has ever been a Spymaster General before. I blazed the trail and took my lumps, finding out what worked and what didn't. I just… wanted you to do what was right without needing to use what was wrong. I had faith in you. In Leila. In everyone in my classes. I had faith you could do what I do, but better. I still do."

"General John, why did you not let me help you, then?" he asked.

"… because I was going to fall. I knew that was my inevitable fate. There was no question about it. I knew I was going off the deep end. I had done too many irredeemable things. I let my emotions control me in all the wrong ways. I thought I repressed them, but they manifested in other ways and in ways I didn't realize until it was too late. If I was going to fall, I wanted to fall alone. You are my successor, Matthew, and in time you will be greater than I ever was. Learn from my failures and my successes and carve your own destiny. Blaze your own trail. Be the Spymaster General, but be that role in your own unique way. I know you have the talent to do it."

Matthew paused as he thought about it. I could tell it would take him a bit of time to accept what I had to say. It was the truth, but it didn't make what happened any less painful or difficult for him to accept. He nodded in acknowledgement.

"I… understand. Perhaps, in time, I will come to understand what you went through with my own two eyes," he said.

"I hope you never have to go through an ultimatum like that… but I know that you will navigate those treacherous waters far better than I did," I replied.

"That… honestly means a lot, General John," he said.

"You don't have to call me General," I replied with a small laugh.

"I'd feel better if I did, sorry," he said. I nodded in reply.

"We still have your outfit, too. It somehow managed to survive the blaze, although it will have to be patched up," Micaiah added.

"Hm, hey, Selena, how attached were you to that outfit?" I asked.

"Why?"

"Can I modify it?"

"How?"

"I want to change the colors on it. Make it something that fits my favorite colors more. If it's going to be my outfit instead of yours, I'd like it to be more my style than your style," I said.

"… what ARE your favorite colors?" Selena asked.

"Blue and purple. Anything cool tone, really," I said. "I promise I won't mess with the actual outfit or its design… I just want to change some of the colors. Or… all of them, really."

"Like what?" Selena asked.

"Make the breastplate a nice dark purple, like a plum! I can even make a dark blue emblem on the chest with some kind of light blue insignia. It would be nice to have my own emblem, you know! Something to distinguish me and who I am. Make the gauntlets black, the greaves a purple to match the armor, make the boots black to match the gauntlets…"

"What about the cape?" Selena asked.

"Hm… a forest green with a dark blue trim. Cool tone like the rest of the outfit, but a different color so that it stands out when it flares out," I said. I saw Nino was writing all that down.

"That can be done, big bro! There's someone in the Fang that could do that. I can even ask them to re-apply the magic in the outfit so that it still resists the elements," Nino offered.

"That would be much appreciated," I replied. "You know someone who can do that?"

"If I send it out now, it could be back in a few days," she replied. I paused for a second as a realization crossed me.

"… wait, how long was I out?" I asked.

"You were out for two whole days," Ike said.

"No… no! I almost missed it!" I exclaimed.

"Missed what?" Selena asked.

"… you guys don't know? How… ironic. How bitterly ironic," I said with a frown.

"Are you going to tell us?" Elincia asked.

"No, I don't think I will. Not yet. I will tell Bastian as soon as I can," I said.

"That… is an odd way of doing things," Micaiah said.

"Trust me, you will thank me for it. Or not. I don't care. You'll see why soon. Also, yes, Nino, if you could do that for the outfit, I would greatly appreciate that. Either way, I did win that arena battle. Speaking of that battle… uh… Elincia… Micaiah… how are you two faring? I can see both of you have sufficiently recovered," I said.

"Selena luckily was aiming to knock me out the entire time. She never came with the intent to kill and stayed her blows accordingly. I… never stood a chance," Micaiah said. "I recovered shortly afterward."

"As for myself, although both her and I hit the wall from your immense spell, my armor prevented any serious damage to my body. Also, since she was in front, she sustained the brunt of your magic. Count Bastian told me that she was in an absolutely critical condition after the fight," Elincia said.

"Was she? Again, Selena… I never meant…"

"It's fine. Like I said, I'm proud that you stood up to your friend for your belief. I couldn't be prouder of you," Selena said.

"Isn't it technically 'more proud' and not 'prouder', though?" I asked.

"… my lord John, you did not just turn this into a grammar moment, did you?" Elincia asked. I wrinkled my nose in disgust.

"Your royal highness, Queen Elincia of Crimea… I am positive you are aware I loathe that title," I said sullenly. I heard Ike kinda hold back a small laugh and saw Nino smile a bit, while Micaiah and Matthew gave all of us weird looks.

"You two still go on about that?" Selena asked.

"Is this… normal?" Micaiah asked.

"Uh, yeah! Those two used to argue about that ALL the time when they were teeangers!" Nino said.

"Argue? Argument is not the way I'd describe it," I said to Nino with a smile and a slight laugh.

"Yes, I must agree with him. Argument implies he has any say in the matter or chance of seizing victory in the verbal spar," Elincia added. My smile quickly disappeared.

"Wait, what? Excuse me? No, I do have say in the matter. Your highness. Queen Elincia of Crimea," I said, emphasizing her title.

"I… do detest that title," she said.

"As do I with mine," I replied. Micaiah looked at the both of us and smiled a little bit.

"I think I'm beginning to understand a bit more now," she said.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"The dynamic that existed within the Crimean revolution was not much different than the dynamic within the Rebel Alliance during our revolution. Similar personalities, similar dynamic… there is something to be said about people treating each other as people in here," Micaiah commented. "Perhaps that is what brought success to both of our revolutions. That is something I am beginning to understand more and more as I work as a general in this army."

"… and, of course, the people that fostered such connections and dynamics," I added. "I can only be positive for so long if nobody echoes it with me."

"Indeed," Ike said.

"Now, I was hoping one of you could get me Count Bastian. I would like to discuss with him some business," I said. Nino nodded and left. The rest of us quietly talked amongst each other and, honestly, it felt nice. If only this kind of community and peace spread through our armies and our nations, this would be so much nicer of a place to live.

"Forsooth, I hath been summoned?" I heard as I saw him walk into the room.

"Ah, Count Bastian, just the man I wanted to speak to," I said as I attempted to sit up in the bed. I felt my muscles cry out from fatigue for some reason. Did I really wear myself out that hard in that battle?

"Ah, the former General John, Spymaster General of Daein, and former General John of the Crimean Army, how may I help you?" he asked.

"I won the arena battle, so what do I get?" I said.

"Theoretically, you would be entitled to some form of say in the fate of both nations like a goddess of fate laying her whims upon us all, but—"

"Bastian, I am not a goddess. I'm not even female. Drop the silver talk and tell me plainly," I said sternly. Bastian gave me a startled look, as if not expecting me to speak to him in that way. I'm sorry, but I do not tolerate unnecessary communication. Give it to me simply and plainly.

"Understood, General John. I do believe that any unreasonable requests would result in a fast mutiny and, seeing as how you are one person representing yourself as a third party with no followers or army to support you and your technically binding leadership… as good of a fighter as you may or may not be, you alone cannot take down both armies," Bastian said. "It would be the shortest rule in the history of Tellius."

"Why are they not rioting right now?" I asked.

"They are mutinous, not because of the fact peace was achieved, but because of who won the arena battle," Bastian said.

"Understood. I was hoping that had I not succeeded, then Micaiah would but…"

"I do not regret my choices," Selena commented. "I still think, in light of recent events, that this is a terrible path to choose."

"What do you wish to do?" Bastian asked. I smiled at him.

"I was told I was unconscious for two days?" I asked.

"Yes, you were," he replied.

"Is anyone here aware what tomorrow is?" I asked. Everyone looked at each other for a second with confused looks before Count Bastian's face lit up.

"I heard tales. Surely you don't mean…" Bastian began.

"It might not be a leap year, but my first proposal is… the same as I made six years ago between Daein and Crimea. Tomorrow is the first day of Histcaymas, and all of you here have been so embroiled in war that you totally forgot about the holiday season! It might not be a leap year as it was when we first used the holiday as a peace offering between the nations, but I'm sure the two armies would oblige," I said.

"Oh, they would indeed! This would definitely be something the armies would enjoy. Hopefully our upcoming guests would oblige," Bastian said quietly.

"Guests?" I asked.

"Prior to the battle, I had sent message to King Tibarn for reinforcements for our war in the hope of ending the war soon," Count Bastian said.

"That… is hilarious and sad, had we continued the war," Matthew commented.

"Why is that?" Bastian asked.

"… because King Naesala is already on his way here with a large portion of his forces to assist us," Matthew replied.

"… General John, you have picked a most worthy successor," Bastian said to me.

"Indeed I had. Indeed I had. Now, Matthew, the thing I told you prior to my departure… have you told anyone about it?" I asked.

"I only told two people, sir," he replied.

"Two people?" I asked.

"This might be a matter that would best be discussed in more select company," he said.

"Indeed, especially considering I have many updates to the information you have, most of which will either amplify or contradict the information I had originally given you," I said.

"… then those two whom I had informed will be present as well," Matthew said.

"After we get done this Histcaymas celebration… I would like to convene a meeting with just Count Bastian, myself, and General Matthew here… and any others who are of sound, tactical mind… as well as those two that Matthew are referring to. It is time we struck the true perpetrators of this unfortunate circumstances we have fallen prey to," I said.

"True perpetrators?" Matthew asked. "Surely you don't mean—"

"Shh, Matthew, let everyone enjoy this holiday season. Give them that much before we give them a load of despair," I said. Count Bastian looked at me, tempted to say something and inquire, but he probably had already deduced I had no inclination to tell him anything prior to when I was ready.

"That was… ominous," Micaiah said with a frown. "In a way, I'm glad I didn't win. I couldn't imagine what I would have done."

"You… would have done what your heart told you, Micaiah. I've seen you grow into the person you are now, thinking both with your heart and your mind. Both you and Elincia here have grown and I look forward to seeing everyone else and the progress you all have made. But, for now, let's enjoy this holiday season. Let's enjoy this peace before we move forward. I'm pretty sure the armies would appreciate it and, by any chance, if the kings of our nations try to stop it, they will find themselves sorely ignored."

"What would you do with King Geoffrey and King Pelleas?" Bastian asked.

"I would speak to them individually about a theory I have that they can confirm or deny," I simply said.

"What would that be?" Matthew asked.

"Fifty-thousand gold," I replied to him with a smile. He frowned at me.

"But you're… what about us?" Matthew asked.

"I have no allegiance to any nation. I have valuable information and can sell it at the right price," I said.

"You're turning into that guy. What a resource you had left me," Matthew commented with a frown. I laughed a little.

"Are you referring to Volke?" Bastian asked.

"Is that his name?" Matthew asked.

"Yes, that's his name," I replied with a smile. "He is… a character, but he is reliable."

"Ah, so you use his services as well?" Bastian asked.

"Naturally. I also left him for Matthew to use," I replied.

"I inquired something of him but he said he was already on a mission," Matthew said.

"Ah, I get that a lot with him. Now that I know General John used him a lot, it seems I know who was the culprit into ensuring his services before I could," Bastian said. I nodded to Matthew.

"Anyway, Matthew, I was joking. Unlike my teacher, I know how to make a joke. Once I have all the facts and I have confirmed them, I will share them at our meeting. It is time we cleared all the airs around us," I said. "Now, Bastian, get the camp ready for a celebration. Peace will soon be upon us."

"Gladly and… with pleasure," Bastian said with a small bow before departing. I looked up at the sky for a second.

"Oh, and Jay?" I said aloud.

"Why do you insist on looking upward when you speak to me?"

"You are a disembodied voice that can see a lot around me, speak to many individuals around with your mind, and you have a general idea how the future will go. How could I not worship you?" I asked aloud in a joking tone.

"Oh, John… Noah here worships certain things that I can do, but that's not a topic to be discussed in mixed company," she cheerfully said with a laugh.

I looked around to see Ike had a puzzled expression on his face… actually, everyone looked puzzled. I heard a groan come from the other side of the curtain and knew Selena understood the implication while Matthew gave a weird look. Is everyone here really that innocent…?

"Noah?" Matthew asked.

"I'll explain after this meeting," Micaiah reassured him.

"Jay, that was something I really didn't need to know about you two and your personal lives."

"I can't help teasing you every once in a while. Anyway, what's up?"

"Remember what you said to me before the big battle royale?"

"Not really. Refresh my memory?"

"You said one person couldn't change the fate of these nations. Do you still think so?"

"… I really hate you, you know that? I don't even have to peek into that world to know you have that stupid shit-eating, smarmy grin that screams 'I Told You So' plastered over your greasy, devious… cute face," she said. "Gods, I can't hate you or be upset with you for any extended period of time."

"That's fine. Anyway, just thought I'd bring that point back up. At least you admitted to being wrong," I said with a laugh.

"You know what? F—"

I cut her out of my mind at that moment… although from the shocked expressions on the faces around me, it appears they were subject to hearing her thoughts at that very moment in time.

"Jay seems… quite passionate," Elincia remarked after a second, as if trying to process what she had just mentally heard.

"Now, um, you guys should go get ready for tomorrow's celebration," I said. "I need to… rest."

"You slept for two days," Ike pointed out.

"… rest is not just physical. I've been through a lot these past few months. I'd like some time while conscious to just think and reflect and sort stuff out. I was expecting to come back and figure a way to set the two nations straight. I was not expected to be handed basically what amounts to some form of tenuous control. Although, as Count Bastian did warn me, I probably could find myself without my head if I say or do anything wrong, so I'll just do my business and be out of your way," I said. The others nodded and left the room, although Micaiah paused at the doorway before looking at me. She took a careful glance to make sure the others had already departed before stepping back into the room.

"John… when you feel better, can we talk about something?" she asked. "I know this is terribly timed, but… I am sure you appreciate the essence of timely information and I would rather not sit in suspense trying to know what your thoughts are."

"Depends on what it is," I replied.

"Do you remember what happened in your mind, when we were fighting to restore your memory?" she asked. I have a feeling I know where this is going.

"If you're referring to what we discussed on the castle rooftop… I think you already know what my answer will be… and that this should be discussed appropriately in the proper time," I replied with a sigh. She broke eye contact and start staring at the ground.

"I thought as much," she replied after a pause.

"Although, in all honesty, I would prefer to have an actual conversation and hear your actual thoughts and discuss this matter in a calm, rational, mature, and logical manner when I am out of this infirmary and we don't have a Four Rider next bed over on the other side of a curtain listening to the conversation and trying to glean information," I commented nonchalantly. Micaiah gave me a startled look and turned slightly red before looking in Selena's direction.

"… I really was hoping you two would forget that I was here," I heard Selena say.

"As if I would forget about my teacher," I replied.

"Out of sight, out of mind," she quipped.

"Nice try, Selena," I commented. "Micaiah, we will talk later. I promise you. Just relax and prepare for tomorrow."

"You know, you nearly broke your last promise," she said.

"… yet I didn't," I replied with a smile. "One way or another, I will fulfill my promises. If I don't, that would make me a liar."

"Rest well, John," she said before leaving, leaving just me and Selena. I waited until I heard her leave the tent.

"So, Selena…" I said. "Tell me something."

"What is it?" she asked.

"First, are we the only ones in this tent?" I asked.

"We are the only ones who sustained severe injuries that day. Everyone else has been discharged," she replied.

"Remember we once had a conversation about blood pacts and how I was doing a lot of research for it back when I was a researcher in Begnion?" I asked. She was silent for a minute and I could tell I was on to something.

"Somehow it doesn't surprise me you would be bringing this up," she evasively said.

"That says all I needed to know," I replied. "You don't have to say anything else."

"I only just found out. I was instructed to never tell anyone…" she said.

"You never did. I merely gleaned information by inferring from various sources," I countered. "Now to find out if the same is going on the other side."

"You mean Crimea?" she asked.

"If you take that into account, doesn't that put this whole war into perspective?" I asked.

"Is this what you were going to discuss with General Matthew and Count Bastian after Histcaymas?" she asked.

"One of the things I wanted to discuss, at least. Indeed, although I was planning on talking to King Geoffrey first to see if I could infer from him whether he was a victim as well or not," I said in reply.

"Why are you telling me this?" she asked. I paused for a second, trying to find the proper way to word my answer.

"You were a general before any of us. You have more experience than us greenhorns combined. You are knowledgeable, experienced, seasoned, and wise. You were my teacher, Selena. Maybe not in the spying arts or anything, but you were both my teacher in life and in the magical arts as well as one of the top generals in the former Daein army. If there was a resource I should have leaned on for support and advice, it should have been you. I know you to be trustworthy and reliable, so I'm bouncing ideas off you right now," I said.

"You really think that highly of me? I… am surprised you trust me this much," she said. "So, supposing both sides are under a blood pact, what is the next step? Why did you want to wait until after the holiday season to act?"

"The next step that I want? Daein and Crimea, as well as all of their allies, formally declare war on Begnion. I want Crimea's might, Daein's might, Gallia's might, Hatari's might, Kilvas' might, and Phoenicis' might working together to overcome the all-powerful Begnion Empire. I want everyone unified in solidarity at a common enemy. If Begnion truly wishes to pit both sides against each other, we can use this scheme of manipulation as motivation for both nations to join forces. The enemy of my enemy is my friend. That was part of the reason I wanted to be in the battle royale. I needed to know if the two sides could co-exist if a greater force was ready to destroy them both. If we can get King Pelleas and King Geoffrey to confirm who made them sign the pacts, we can end the pacts by killing that individual and destroying those documents," I said. "I already have my suspicions on who forced their hands through clever manipulation, but I would like confirmation of my theory before I move forward."

"The apostle is our ally, though," Selena said.

"… tell me something Selena. Don't you find it strange how the apostle never stopped the occupation of Daein? Do you really think General Jarod was acting against the orders of his superiors behind their backs like was claimed?" I asked.

"What do you mean?" Selena asked.

"The Apostle has been declared sick for the past few years by the senate. That is what the public was told. Prime Minister Sephiran has apparently stepped down and been replaced with the former Senator Lekain, the official reason being personal matters. Everyone who was loyal to the Apostle has been systematically removed and taken out of power. General Zelgius has been replaced by this mysterious masked figure that appears to answer personally to Lekain. The truth is, the Apostle has been imprisoned for a while. She is not sick by any stretch of the imagination. Generals Sigrun and Tanith are also imprisoned in the same place Apostle Sanaki is imprisoned, put there under the claim that they were the ones poisoning the empress and causing her to fall ill. When Prime Minister Sephiran found out, he fled Begnion to save his life. We don't know his whereabouts, despite our best efforts. Trust me, I've had Volke searching high and low. Right now we need all the allies we can get and I feel he could have possibly been a valuable ally. Apparently the senate has basically taken over Begnion," I said.

"Wait, what?! How do you know about this? When did you find out?" Selena asked incredulously.

"Volke told me. Remember I asked for a significant portion of the restoration funds to take care of matters shortly after the revolution for the freedom of Daein? That was to pay him for a huge mission that I had sent him on. That mission and research netted me that information. I've known about this since then. Since before the talks with Crimea and their issues with Ludveck. I've known this whole time and I've been working and doing my best to avoid the repercussions of that. I'm also convinced Lekain is who convinced Ludveck to incite the revolution against Queen Elincia. Prime Minster Lekain is probably also who signed the pacts with King Geoffrey and King Pelleas. He probably disguised the one with King Geoffrey as a peace pact when Daein started restoring itself as some sort of alliance… and he probably disguised the one with King Pelleas as some sort of formal apology for General Jarod's actions. That's why I stayed away after the incident of Death Valley. I needed to move freely and without scrutiny across this countryside to gather more information," I said. "I also believe him to be the one who framed me and pressured King Geoffrey into the charade of using the debacle of the diplomatic talks to smear my character and cause both sides to mistrust me. He probably hired a skilled assassin to mimic my signature…"

"That's… are you sure?"

"I am already quite positive I am correct, but I will be a hundred percent sure when I one day meet him. I will be sure to take great pride and joy in extracting that information with surgical precision and to make the process painstakingly slow to ensure that I bleed out every single last detail from this vein of information," I replied simply. There was a long silence from Selena and I got the feeling she shuddered at my answer.

"There… is a reason we kept your division covert and your actions unknown to us."

"The things we did were on a need to know basis, and you did not need to know."

"Who else knows?" she asked quietly.

"Besides you now and me? General Matthew knows a small portion of it. I entrusted this to him the night I named him my successor."

"What do you mean?" she asked.

"He only knew that there was a power struggle between the Apostle and the Senate and that the senate was planning a coup. I only told him what I knew for a fact. The rest that I told you… I learned during my time away. I plan on updating him and telling Count Bastian at the meeting after Histcaymas, as well as the blood pacts and my strategy for moving forward," I said.

"Is that what you meant earlier by when you asked him if he told anyone?" she asked.

"Yes," I replied. There was silence coming from her side of the tent.

"John… why did you bear this burden alone?" she asked.

"… truthfully, I didn't want to dump any of this on any of you. This was supposed to be my job and my role and I perceived it as a weakness if I had to ask one of you for help. I now realize my perceived weakness is actually my greatest strength. My strength is the ability to gather those around me to cover what I cannot do… and the ability to use everyone's abilities to their greatest potential to achieve success as a team. Relying on my friends isn't a weakness… it's a core part of who I am," I said. "The whole is greater than the sum of its parts and my ability lay within bringing those parts together."

"… I'm proud of you for discovering that about yourself. I really am…" she said.

"I know. It means a world of praise hearing you compliment me like so. I've spent so much time around you, learning from you, respecting and admiring you… and to think now you see me as an equal just makes me feel like I can accomplish anything. I wouldn't be here today if it wasn't for you… Selena, I…"

"You what, John?" she asked. I paused and sighed.

"I want to keep growing. I want to keep making you more and more proud of me. I want this world to recognize the value of hard work and determination, and that the will and drive for peace will overcome any and all hatred and bias and negativity," I said.

"Is that all? It sounded as if you wanted to say something else," she said.

"No, that's it," I replied. "I just have come to truly appreciate what I have now."

"That is what is called maturity. That very attribute that you so respect within me and look up to has grown quite impressively within you as well. That is yet another torch that I have passed to you and, one day, you will pass on to the next generation of people."

"Hmm… yeah, you're right. I remember we once had a discussion where you said I was becoming more mature. It seems a while ago and I still can see the immaturity I had then, but compared to when I first got here, I had indeed made progress up to that point. It's a daily improvement and you never really see the change until you reflect back upon a period in time when you were a different person," I said.

"Indeed, John. Indeed…" she replied. I sighed to myself and stared at the ceiling.

"I think I'm going to try to get back to sleep. I need to ponder how to approach things and how we can talk the soldiers into yet another war," I said.

"The soldiers on both sides will be more receptive when they find out why they are waging the war," Selena replied.

"Do you really want to tell everyone our kings were being manipulated?" I asked.

"You've worked in secrecy for so long, sometimes I think you forget the value of human empathy when honesty is laid out before them," Selena replied. I made a noise to myself as I thought about it.

"… I already am reaping the benefits of the lesson I learned. I'm glad I talked this through with you," I said with a smile.

"I can hear that smile on your face, John," she said with a small laugh.

"… I'm supposed to be the information general here," I commented.

"… and what do you think we did prior to your role being created? All of the former Four Riders had some aptitude in information gathering. That was our role and that was our goal… to all gather information and share it with each other. As I said once, we were four parts to a whole, working together to be greater than the sum of its parts… even if Petrine and I did not get along," she said quietly.

"… perhaps the Four Riders could benefit from a re-shuffling of responsibilities," I said.

"That is for us to decide," she said. "Do your thing as an individual. We will be relying upon your skills as a counsel. Perhaps you will become the second coming of Volke."

"Yeah, I can imagine the two of us trying not to get in each other's way as we scour this continent in search of nuggets to sell. If I become his competition, he might end up having to cut his prices a bit," I remarked. I yawned a bit. Was I really still this tired?

"I heard that, even though you tried to stifle it," she said.

"Do you have to rub that in my face. Okay, maybe I should've made you the next Spymaster General instead of Matthew," I said.

"Oh Ashera no," she replied. "Anyway, go get to sleep, John. We have four days of peace and relaxation before the true war begins."

I nodded and closed my eyes. As I drifted off, I hoped to myself that I could do this properly… gently nudge both nations in a direction away from Begnion's influence and into prosperity. I cannot do this alone. I will need all the help I can get… and with all the friends I've made over the years, I think we might stand a chance…

… a chance for ultimate peace across this continent.