Fafnir landed in the snow.

"YOU!" shouted a gruff voice. Fafnir looked up and saw a rough-looking gray-haired man dressed all in black. In fact, everyone around him was dressed in black. Fafnir got up and examined himself. He was in the black suit he wore when he was in Japan. Good, he thought, I'm also in black. I blend in.

"Who the fuck are you?" the man asked.

"Me? I'm just looking for a friend. You wouldn't have happened to see a spunky blonde-haired woman dressed in animal skins, would you?" he asked in his nicest human voice.

The man threw his head back and laughed. "Looks like fancy-boy over here is dreaming of fucking wildlings," he said. "Let's show him what we do to wildlings, shall we? How about...Lord Snow? Teach our new brother a lesson, will ya?"

The man called Lord Snow didn't look like any lord that Fafnir had seen before. He didn't look any different than any of the other men around him, although he had that dark and brooding thing going on that fangirls liked so much. Lord Snow drew his sword.

"Alright, Sasuke, if that's how we're going to play," Fafnir whispered to himself. "Let's play." Fafnir held out his palm, and the sword Hrotti materialized in his hand. Gasps and murmurs came from all of the men around them.

Lord Snow's eyes widened. "Where did you get that?" he muttered.

"From your nightmares, pretty boy," Fafnir declared. Fafnir lunged at Snow, and Snow tried to block him, but Fafnir moved too fast. Hrotti ran through Snow's arm, and blood splattered.

"Oh, SHIT!" the old man said.

Fafnir turned his sword to the old man. "I shall cut down all of you here if you do not hand over all of your gold this instant," he declared.

Fear passed through the old man's eyes. "Gold? You're going to try to rob the Night's Watch? Piece of shit, who are you?"

"I am Fafnir the Insatiable. My greed knows no bounds, and my powers are great and terrible. Hand over your gold, and I will be on my way," Fafnir declared.

"You dumb fucker, we don't have any gold! We're poorest army in all the land! Go rob King's Landing if you're looking for gold. It'd do a lot more good for this world too, eliminating that lot," he said.

"What, you don't rape and pillage like any respectable army?" asked Fafnir.

"Our job is to protect the realm from the wildlings beyond the Wall," said Lord Snow. "Please, if you eliminate us, you open up this world to all sorts of terrors."

"That sounds fun," said Fafnir. "What sorts of terrors are we talking about?"

"Savages. Giants. Everything," said Lord Snow.

Fafnir considered. "Could you take me to King's Landing, Lord Snow?"

"Uhh, no," said Lord Snow.

Fafnir sighed. "I'll take the savages and giants and everything, then."

Fafnir exchanged his suit for the fluffy black robe.

"Insatiable Shit," said Alliser Thorne, "what gods do you pray to? The Seven, or the Weirwood?"

"I pray to no one," said Fafnir. "I have yet to meet a god worth praying to, and I've met quite a few."

"Aye, that's about the smartest thing I've heard from anyone around here," said Thorne. "Well, we have a group going to the chapel, and a smaller group going to the Weirwood to take their vows."

"I'll go with the smaller group, I guess," said Fafnir. "But is all of this pomp really necessary? I'm beginning to think there really aren't any savages and giants, and you're just going to laugh at me when this is all done."

"I wish I could say you're right," said Alliser. "But no." Lord Snow and Samwell Tarley walked by. "Hey, Snow, Tarley, Fafnir is coming with you."

"Oh, of course he is," Sam whispered uneasily. Sam was not a Fafnir fan, and Jon had to admit, Fafnir was odd, but, there was something that drew Jon to him. Fafnir's fighting ability was literally supernatural, for one. And the way he'd just signed on as if he had nothing better to do in his life. The way he looked forward to killing was terrifying, but given the circumstances, Fafnir was someone you wanted on your side.

"Fafnir! You're a devotee to the old gods too, then?" Jon asked hopefully.

"What is the deal with humans and gods?" Fafnir asked. Give this lot time, he thought, and they'll be bowing down to me. "I have no gods. But I like you, Lord Snow. I'll meet this so-called god of yours."

"That," said Fafnir, "is a tree with a face in it."

"Shhh," said Jon, "the Weirwood sees everything."

"So what? Is that all it takes to get worshiped, to be able to see? I'd worship Loki before I worshiped a tree with a face!"

"Shut up," squeaked Sam. "It's time for our vows."

They repeated together: "Night gathers, and now my watch begins. It shall not end until my death. I shall take no wife, hold no lands, father no children. I shall wear no crowns and win no glory. I shall live and die at my post. I am the sword in the darkness. I am the watcher on the walls. I am the fire that burns in the cold, the light that brings the dawn, the horn that wakes the sleepers, the shield that guards the realms of men. I pledge my life and honor to the Night's Watch, for this night and all nights to come."

Soon the new watch recruits got their squad assignments. Fafnir shared barracks with Jon, Sam, Pypar, and Grenn. When Jon announced his placement, they were all stunned.

"WHAT?!" Fafnir growled. "But you're the second best fighter to me!"

"I know! It's all because Alliser Thorne doesn't like me!" Jon whined.

"Well, that's no excuse. Alliser Thorne doesn't like anyone! He made me a ranger, and he calls me Insatiable Shit!" said Fafnir.

"What's going on?" Sam asked, entering their barracks. "Thanks again, by the way, Jon, for convincing them to make me a steward. Unfortunately, that means I won't be seeing much of you anymore."

"Think again," said Jon. "I'm a steward too!"

"What?!" Sam gasped.

"Personal steward to the Lord Commander Jeor Mormont," said Jon.

"Oh!" said Sam. "That makes more sense."

"What? What about it makes sense?" Jon demanded.

"Don't you see? You're being groomed to be the next Lord Commander!" Sam said excitedly.

"That's silly," said Jon.

"No, it's not!" said Sam. "Think about it! You're highborn..."

"I'm a bastard. That hardly counts," said Jon.

"You grew up in a castle. That's basically highborn around here," said Sam. "And you established yourself as a leader among the recruits almost instantly."

"Even so," said Jon, "my talents are wasted as a steward!"

"And it's that attitude that needs a bit of an adjustment that only menial work can provide," said Sam happily. Sam was simply happy that his friend wouldn't be leaving him.

Fafnir snickered in the corner. His snickers grew until he had to pick up his straw pillow to muffle the sounds.

"Something funny, Fafnir?" Jon asked.

"Oh, I was just thinking," said Fafnir, "you guys are basically maids."

Pypar and Grenn enjoyed a good laugh at Jon and Sam's expense. The "maids" both threw their pillows at Fafnir in disgust and tried to get some sleep. Once they were snoring, Fafnir popped over to Japan for the night. Yes, he'd come back, he decided. He liked Lord Maid Jon Snow. There was something about him. But, that Sam was a bore, and Castle Black not the nicest place to sleep in.