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Freddie got a blank piece of parchment and wrote out a clear and concise recipe for the Invisibility Antidote, consulting their notes from the journal. When she finished, she folded up the parchment. She finished off her glass of wine while she watched Bruce the rat scurry around, investigation corners of the cellar. She set down her empty glass and pulled out her wand.
"Accio," she said, pointing it at Bruce.
The rat flew towards her and she caught him in mid-air. She quickly put the surprise rat back into his cage and shut the door of the cage.
"Thank you, Bruce," she said, looking at him through the cage. "You deserve a piece of cheese, I think."
She turned off the record player, put her recipe in her pocket. She picked up Bruce's cage in one hand and her empty wineglass in the other, then headed upstairs. She put the glass and the cage on the kitchen counter and opened the fridge.
"What are you doing, Winifred?"
Freddie straightened up and saw Snape standing in the doorway leading into the sitting room, a book in his hand.
"Giving Bruce a piece of cheese," she said innocently, shutting the fridge. "What are you doing?"
"I told you not to get too attached," he warned.
"I'm not," she said defensively. "I'm just giving him cheese. He was a good boy, he helped us test our potion."
"It's a rat it's what it's here for," he said. "I too tested your potion."
"You want some cheese?" she offered teasingly. He raised an eyebrow then leaned across the counter, his hand outstretched. She broke off a piece of cheese and gave it to him. He nodded his thanks and left the kitchen.
Curious, Freddie left the rat on the counter and followed him. He was sitting in the armchair, an open book in his lap.
"Not working on your super secret potion tonight?" she asked.
"Not right now, I need a break," he said, sipping his wine and turning the page.
"Maybe you need a fresh set of eyes?" she offered.
"No," he said shortly.
"Okay," she said amicably. "Just trying to help."
"Do you have your recipe to send off for publication?"
"Yeah," she said, pulling the folded parchment from her pocket and handing it to him. He opened it, scanned it, and nodded.
"You put my name on it too?"
"You deserve partial credit. I couldn't have done it without you. You taught me everything I know about Potions," she said, smiling at him, hoping flattery would work on him. He smiled back, briefly, then cleared his throat.
"Very well," he said, folding the parchment and tucking it into his pocket. "I will send it off in the morning when I get to Hogwarts."
"Thanks. Is it...okay if I sit in here and read with you?"
"I do not care what you do," he retorted, and turned his attention back to his book.
Pleased, Freddie pursued the dusty shelves, looking for something to read. She spent a few minutes looking at the books. She came across a particularly dusty section of the shelves. She used her thumb to wipe away the dust from the spines of some of the books and uncovered one titled Defying Dementors.
Intrigued, she pulled the book from the shelf. She used her t-shirt to clean the dust from the cover then took it to the couch to read. She stretched out on the couch, putting her feet up on one arm. Snape glanced up at her, at the title of the book, then grunted softly as he turned his attention back to his book.
Freddie spent the next hour pouring over the book, determined to figure out how to deal with dementors. If she ever came face to face with one again, she wanted to be able to defend herself. She read every word about Patronuses and how to cast one. On one page she discovered something drawn in the margins. A flower, possibly a lily. Lily, she realized, tracing the drawing with one finger. Severus' friend.
She sat up and pulled out her wand, pointing it at the ground. She tried to think of a happy memory. Kissing Snape was the first thing that came to mind.
Expecto Patronum, she thought determinedly.
A small wisp of silver came from her wand tip but disappeared immediately. Frowning slightly, she tried again.
"What are you doing, Miss Gray?" Snape asked, startling her.
"Oh, uh...a Patronus Charm, or at least I'm trying to," she answered.
"Why?"
"Well if I ever have the misfortune of meeting a dementor again, I want to be able to defend myself, to do something – other than run. I mean it was everything I could do just to run. I almost threw myself off the cliff, that – that thing just got into my head so bad, I couldn't...it took everything I had in me just to Disapparate."
Snape said nothing but stared at her intently, his expression unreadable.
"Can you cast one?" she asked curiously.
He exhaled slowly and closed his book. He pulled out his wand and closed his eyes. In the flickering firelight she saw his face soften.
"Expecto Patronum," he whispered, flicking his wrist.
A wisp of silver erupted from the tip of his wand and took the form of a doe. She was absolutely stunning. The silver-white light was dazzling, almost blinding in the way she outshone the fireplace and candles, filling the dark room with her light.
"Oh," Freddie uttered softly as the doe turned to her. The doe moved across the room sleekly, elegantly. When she reached the couch the doe sniffed her curiously.
Freddie held out one, trembling hand, unsure if she would be able to touch the creature or not. The book hadn't specified if they were solid or not. She looked ethereal, like a ghost, but brighter. The doe's ears flicked towards her then she moved her head, putting her muzzle under Freddie's outstretched palm.
"Don't-" Snape began but stopped.
Freddie let out a soft cry as her hand made contact with the Patronus. She felt warm to the touch but not only that. The warmth spread up Freddie's arm, encompassing her entire body in a feeling that could only be described as pure happiness and love.
When the doe vanished beneath her fingertips a moment later, the feeling dissipated so quickly it brought tears to her eyes.
"Wow," she said softly, blinking away the tears. There was a catch in her throat and she cleared it.
"I tried to warn you," Snape said softly. "It can be...shocking."
"I see," she said, wiping her hand across her eyes. "...I need to be able to do that. The wand movement you did-?"
"It had nothing to do with the wand movements," he said, shaking his head. "The key is the memory – the happier the memory, the better chance you have of producing a corporeal Patronus."
Freddie nodded and lifted her wand again. She thought back to that night at the end of last semester, when Snape had kissed her. How it felt, how her whole body had tingled as his scotch-soaked tongue explored her mouth.
"Expecto Patronum," she said, flicking her wand as he had...but still only vapor.
Snape shook his head slightly and returned his attention to his book.
Freddie kept practicing, over and over again, but only getting wisps.
It has to be the memory, she decided, after failing for what felt like the hundredth time. It's a happy memory but it's too complicated, there's too much...drama surrounding it. Time to try something else.
She wracked her brain for another happy memory. She thought of times with Daniel, flying, listening to music, but she knew that wouldn't work. Any time she thought of Daniel it made her sad.
Okay, so, something else, she thought. Hmm...
Then it hit her. She had felt happy an hour or so ago. When she'd finally gotten results from her Invisibility Antidote. She focused on that, that triumphant feeling.
"Expecto Patronum," she said hopefully.
A little more vapor, but nothing substantial. She tried again. And again. She noticed Snape's eyes flicking towards her periodically. She tried to ignore him and focus on her happy memory.
Eventually, Snape closed his book again and stood up.
"I'm going to bed," was all he said.
"That's it? No helpful tips? Advice?" she asked, feeling frustrated.
"No," he said. "It is a difficult charm to master. Many people cannot perform it."
"The book said if a Dark wizard or witch attempts a Patronus Charm they'll be consumed by maggots coming from their wand," she said uncertainly.
He paused and looked at her, an expression of surprise on his face. Then he did something that surprised her – he began to laugh. As much as she delighted in hearing the sound, she didn't like that it was directed at her.
"And what is so funny?" she asked, standing up and crossing her arms.
"You...you think you are a Dark witch? You think your soul is so damaged that your own magic would turn against you?" he asked, trying to fight back his laughter.
She shrugged uncertainly and dropped her arms.
"It is a charm to be cast by someone pure of heart. If anyone can cast it, hell if I can cast it, then so can you, little girl."
She smiled briefly at the term of endearment, one he hadn't used in weeks.
"Then why can't I do it?" she asked. "Why can't I cast a Patronus?"
"It is almost certainly because you have not found a happy enough memory. And that, Miss Gray," he said as he walked up the stairs. "I cannot help you with."