HOLY HIATUS!
I must say, I have not published a story (or written one, for that matter) in 5-6 years. With the release of Kingdom Hearts III, I have a newfound love for writing and creating fanfictions for my favorite pairing.
Anyway, this is my comeback. Not that I had much of a career to come back to, but I am pouring a lot of work into this story, as it's extremely personal to me and what I've been through.
So without further ado, I present: Shackles of Lust!
WARNING: The themes in this story are very graphic, but unfortunately very real. Mature adults only - otherwise, please avert your eyes.
I do not claim to own anything Kingdom Hearts, although I wish I did.
College wasn't that bad, Sora figured – extremely dull and boring, but not absolute torture like the way he was expecting when he first started attending classes three years ago.
"Earth to Sora!" exclaimed Roxas, waving his hand in front of Sora's face, tearing his concentration away from the textbook he was attempting to study. Sora rolled his eyes as he made eye contact with the blonde before he continued. "Which pair makes my ass look better?" Roxas was clutching two pairs of khaki pants, holding each one up in front of his waist to sample them. Sora saw exactly no difference between the two, and honestly, had no intention on trying to find a difference for Roxas's sake.
To be perfectly frank, college couldn't possibly be so torturous with a roommate like Roxas. They had become close friends within the last three years since meeting in the remedial math class their first year of college. Sora first came into contact (quite literally) with the boy when Roxas came barreling into the classroom on his skateboard, with no regard for anyone else's safety or privacy – and Sora was no exemption. Roxas took the liberty to sit (or more accurately – crash) directly next to Sora, a complete stranger at the time, and Roxas intrusively asked him about his thoughts on the professor's 'perky ass,' as Roxas referred to it. Sora was immediately introduced to Roxas's not-so-subtle way of speaking, which often left Sora with red cheeks whenever Roxas opened his mouth. After three years, though, Sora grew used to the manner in which Roxas spoke.
This, however, was the first year they became roommates. Sora still hadn't come to a definitive conclusion as to whether or not he enjoyed it. He was still getting used to the fact that he was currently living with such an openly gay guy – not that Sora cared about Roxas's sexual preferences, but it occasionally became a predicament when he was forced to bear witness to Roxas and his boyfriend performing coitus unannounced. Multiple times.
"I don't care, Roxas," Sora sighed, trying to force his attention back to his textbook.
"Lame." Roxas threw the two pants back on his bed, which was by the window. Apparently Roxas had claimed this bed 'just in case any perverts wanted a free show' by peeking into the window. "As much as I hate her, Kairi would be more helpful than you are." Roxas smirked, knowing exactly how to push Sora's buttons without completely pissing him off.
"She's just a phone call away, you know." At the mention of Kairi's name, Sora checked his phone. He hadn't heard from her since early in the morning, which was odd. They generally exchanged text messages throughout the day, but lately it seemed as though she was ignoring him most days. Sora's history with Kairi mostly consisted of being friend-zoned throughout childhood and high school, but had finally become an official relationship soon after they both entered college. Sora would never admit it to anyone, but he practically chose this particular college – Salisbury State College (a name that often gets snickers from students for the relation to salisbury steaks) – to avoid he and Kairi from becoming distant and subsequently losing all contact with each other. "You really hate her?" Sora questioned, turning to face Roxas, placing an elbow on the back of his office chair.
Roxas gave Sora an exasperated look. "I know she's your girlfriend and all, but she's too… good."
Sora raised his eyebrow. "And that's bad thing?"
"She's holding you back, man. You've got to learn to live, and she's not letting you."
Roxas's blunt speech was both a blessing and a curse to Sora. This was one of the times he saw it as a curse. "Coming from the guy who's lucky to get a C grade in any class." Sora narrowed his eyes, wondering who in their right mind made the decision to allow Roxas to be accepted into a higher education.
Roxas smirked. "At least I'm here for the experience. Isn't that what college is for anyway?" He began walking towards Sora until he was inches away from his face, poking his nose with each word. "Live-" poke. "A-" poke. "Little." poke.
Sora decided not to dignify his persistence with any response. He never understood the appeal to alcohol or drugs. Even since turning legal age to drink this year, he didn't possess the desire to attend parties and experiment like most people in college. To Roxas's credit, though, some of that attitude may be due to Kairi's influence. She often found a way to make him feel guilty about getting drunk without her. Sora had gotten used to avoiding the mind-altering substances within the last two years of their relationship to avoid the potential of any fights. He checked his phone again, disappointment shrouding his face upon seeing there was still no answer from Kairi.
Roxas took note of Sora's sunken expression. "She with Cloud?" he asked softly. He knew the concept of Kairi and Cloud being together was a sore subject. Despite how Roxas came off as rude and sarcastic to most people, he genuinely cared about his friends and took pride in his loyalty to them.
"Probably," Sora answered, avoiding eye contact with his roommate. "The due date for their project is coming up soon." Even as he said it, something tugged at his gut that hinted at the excuse being total bullshit. Somewhere deep down, Sora knew this, but his optimistic nature kept him from accepting it.
"Well, Sora… This is as good excuse as any for you to come with me to see Axel at work tonight." Roxas's voice became sickeningly chipper.
Sora chuckled at the thought. He knew Axel worked as a bartender at a strip club, which he wasn't sure whether it was strictly a gay strip club or not – either way, it was not his scene. "The answer is still the same as always, Rox. Absolutely not."
"But So-ra," Roxas singsonged. "Axel keeps telling me about this super hot dancer he works with. You have to come check him out with me! You can't possibly call yourself my friend if you don't enjoy these things with me."
Sora shook his head, adamant about his decision like every other time. "I refuse to take part in your drool-fest. Besides, I have to think of a Valentine's Day surprise for Kairi."
Roxas groaned, clearly bored with the topic of Kairi. "Since I'm such a good friend, I'll bite." He paused to let out an exaggerated sigh, then continued, "What are you planning, Sora?" Roxas asked, his voice laced with mocking sarcasm.
Sora completely ignored Roxas's dramatic reaction. "I need to bring back the spark. Something romantic and Notebook-esque."
Roxas looked at the brunette with his blue eyes widened for a moment, but his expression soon softened, looking almost bored. "… Lame."
Sora shook a hand at the blonde dismissively, turning back to his desk in an attempt to focus on the textbook once again. Instead, however, Sora could only focus on his plans for Kairi. After all, he had less than a week to make a decision. He bounced several ideas back and forth in his mind – a rose pedal trail to a warm bath drawn, with candles surrounding the tub; a treasure hunt with love notes strewn around the dorm; a song written specifically for her. Sora couldn't decide on what to do, especially with the pestering doubt in the back of his mind that consistently reminded him of the possibility of Kairi being with Cloud. His thoughts transformed to nightmarish ideas of what the two would be doing together – feelings of betrayal flooding his mind, since he was stuck in his dorm thinking of ideas about how to impress her, meanwhile her thoughts were likely on everything but him.
His phone finally rang.
Sora immediately perked up, seeing Kairi's name on the screen. He pressed the green phone icon on the screen in a matter of seconds. "Kairi!" he exclaimed into the speaker, eager to hear her voice.
Kairi's tone, however, did not match the excitement that Sora displayed. "Hey, hun. Can I see you?" She spoke slowly into the phone, but Sora had trouble deciphering the cause behind it.
Despite Kairi's somber tone, the words were music to Sora's ears. He had barely spoken to her all day, and they hadn't been able to spend quality time together since Kairi's focus was transitioned to this project about a month ago. "I'd like nothing more than that, Kai."
"Great. Meet me on the bench?"
Sora was slightly puzzled; he had assumed she would be coming into his dorm like she usually did. "Sure…" his voice trailed off. He noticed Roxas shoot a concerned look out of the corner of his eye. The other line on the phone abruptly clicked off.
Roxas didn't dare say what was on his mind for once, regardless of knowing what was coming once Sora stepped foot outside to meet Kairi. "Everything okay, Sora?"
Sora swallowed the lump in his throat. The entire situation definitely didn't seem right, but Sora refused to be pessimistic. He forced a smile, "Yeah, I'm sure she's just tired. She had a long day."
"If you say so," Roxas muttered. "I'll stick around for a bit, yeah?"
Sora nodded in appreciation for Roxas's support, shrugging his pea coat over his shoulders to brace himself for the chilly February night. He put his hand on the door handle, taking a deep breath before exiting the dorm room. Sora descended the stairs of the building, counting each step in an attempt to calm his thoughts. He felt his heart pounding against his chest. He opened the main door to the building to make his way into the brittle cold, the heavy door slamming behind him. The bench Kairi referred to on the phone was a mere twelve feet away, which seemed like twelve miles for Sora in this moment in time. He cupped his hands around his mouth and blew hot breath into them. His nose was already starting to turn red.
Sora eventually made his way to the bench and sat down, inspecting the area for any signs of Kairi. He spotted her a small distance away, standing by the college's shuttle booth – another figure standing next to her. Sora's heart skipped a few beats as he came to the realization that this figure was none other than Cloud. Sora found himself gritting his teeth in frustration, watching the two awkwardly move around each other. When he watched them hug – for just a little longer than a friendly hug should be – Sora grunted, but decided against making his presence known. Possibly (or entirely, he wasn't sure which) out of curiosity to see how far this went.
To his minor relief, the two did go their separate ways without signs of intimate affection, and Kairi turned in Sora's direction to make her way to the bench. Sora put his head between his hands, coming to the realization that this conversation likely wouldn't turn out as well as he hoped.
"Thanks for meeting me out here, Sora."
Sora looked up to see Kairi standing next to him, a soft smile on her pale face. "Couldn't have picked a warmer spot, huh?" he replied, trying to make light of the situation.
Kairi sat next to the freezing brunette, ignoring his comment. Sora's leg began to bounce impatiently, waiting for her to start this conversation. "I've been worried about you, lately," Kairi began, placing a hand on Sora's back.
"I've been worried about us, lately." Sora tried to mask the desperation in his voice, his eyes full of regret for coming out here.
Kairi was silent, validating Sora's concerns. "I'm guessing you know why I asked you to talk with me." She looked down, fiddling with her fingernails.
Sora felt the sting of tears forming behind his eyes. "Is it Cloud?" He sniffed, refusing to make eye contact with her.
Kairi looked surprised. Sora wasn't sure if her shock was genuine, or if she was a fantastic liar. "Sora, he has nothing to do with this. I just…" her voice was audibly shaky. "I just had a change of heart. I don't feel the same as I once did."
The last sentence echoed in Sora's ears. His gut started contracting, still suspicious about her relations to Cloud. The recognition of he and Kairi's relationship ending wasn't hitting him yet. It seemed so final, so incredibly abrupt. It wasn't feasible. Almost three years – gone to waste.
Kairi gently placed her finger on Sora's chin, guiding him to look up at her. "I'm so sorry, Sora," she whispered, giving him a small peck on the temple.
And just like that, she walked away, so easily; while Sora was left to wallow in self-pity and replay this memory in his mind over and over again, alone on the nearly freezing bench in the middle of campus. He felt pathetic.
He composed himself enough to return back into the dorm room, where Roxas was waiting – proving his words to be true about sticking around. Roxas somehow knew exactly what was going to transpire. Sora collapsed on his bed, tears instantly breaking free. Roxas sat next to the brunette and snaked his arms around the shambling mess of a boy to hold him in a protective embrace, only whispering 'she's a bitch' quietly in Sora's ear. This particular scenario was one of the times where Roxas's blunt way of speaking was a blessing to Sora.
This chapter is ultra-short compared to the ones I already have written, so brace yourself for impact on the other chapters!
I hope you all enjoy the story - I know I'm already having fun writing it!
Love Always!