Hello once again everyone, to another of Saint's April Fools' mad ideas! Hope it helps brighten your days in these times with this damn virus keeping us all at home.
This is a particularly whacky one, long 'cause it's self-concluding (More or less), and that actually came to my mind months ago. This is what happens when one particular Alicization scene I was looking forward to getting animated and a silly conversation caused by it combines with the salt of failing to roll for a certain character in a phone gatcha game :D (Also, some Lusus Naturae's inspiration for the 'tone')
Without further delay, enjoy the creepiness and the shenanigans!
Disclaimer: SAO doesn't belong to me, sadly, but to Reki Kawahara. Everything else except for the plot belongs to the dark and amazing mind of Howard Phillips Lovecraft
The Kouhai's Silver Key
When Ronye Arabel was born, it was the strangest and most chaotic day in the Underworld's history.
Domestic and farm animals were restless. Children sang strange songs they couldn't quite tell their parents where they had heard from. The shadows of the night seemed especially ominous and Lunaria's shine seemed oddly weak.
However, the greatest and strangest thing was the 'star' soaring through the skies that entire night, visible from every corner of the human world AND the Dark Territory at the same time; something that should have been impossible but, given the world's state, this was a fact that nobody could have truly known about.
At least, not until it was already 'too late'.
And while people at the Central Cathedral panicked and tried to understand the celestial phenomenon, the birth of a little baby went completely ignored. Even when all the Light Elements in the house failed at the same time when she came to the world or that she didn't cry in the slightest upon doing so.
In the darkness that followed, only vaguely illuminated by the light of the star outside, nobody noticed that the girl's right eye was 'consumed' with a small blink, before appearing once again, the blood just adding to the one that still covered her from her birth.
Ronye Arabel was a strange baby too. She never cried, she never gave her parents much trouble...yet none of it was bad at all, so nobody paid it much attention to it.
When she was 5 years old, she was already able to write and read better than anyone her age. Despite being low-class nobles, her parents were extremely proud and even bragged a little about it.
She was a gloomy girl, or so everyone thought. She never smiled, after all, always having this weirdly serious look on her face...something that Tiese Shtolienen, the daughter of some friends of her parents, tried to change. Her self-proclaimed best friend dragged her everywhere, talked about the dreams of her future, and always was trying to make her smile.
Ronye Arabel...humored her. After all, she knew things nobody else did ever since she was born. She had been able to truly SEE how insignificant their existences were, in the grand scheme of the cosmic board.
They were bacteria within the playground of slightly bigger bacteria. Meaningless to the cosmos and the true horrors that governed it all...like her True Progenitor.
Not the humans that called themselves her parents, no. The Arabel were nice, have given her anything a girl would want to be happy, and never mistreated her. If anything, that had earned them a spot of salvation when the time to answer The Call of her Father came. Tiese and her family too, she guessed. Her redhead friend was nice and kind, something meaningless for the world, but that the human side of her had found endearing.
She entered the Swordcraft Academy as her 'parents' wished, deciding that she would do them the kindness of this being the last thing she would ever do that they wanted. Tiese being there too helped, helped her ignore the sneer of other 'higher' nobles and the disdain she felt against the cage put in this world by the fake rulers, both those hiding in the white tower and those 'above'.
As soon as she finished that academy, though, she would set them all FREE. Going into her first year with Tiese, that certainty only grew, and knowing that the world would soon be consumed by the mercy of the Outer Gods made her faintly smile. She was NOT looking forward to serving some entitled human as a 'valet' for an entire year, though, so when she was called to meet the Elite Swordsman that had chosen her she was ready to find more disappointment in humanity...
"Ronye, right? Name is Kirito! Pleased to meet you!"
...except...what was this?
Why was this one different? Why wasn't he like the rest of the cattle within this 'Underworld'?
"Well, today I would like to test how good you are to decide how exactly I should teach you...it's my first time doing this, so sorry if I screw-up, okay?"
...why was he like this? Why?
What...?
"Oh man, Ronye, that was amazing! The Aincrad Style will suit you great, I'm sure!"
...this wasn't right. She felt WEIRD being close to this anomaly. Her body reacted in ways it had never before...
"Elite Swordsman feels a bit too much for me...so, uhm, how about just calling me Sempai? I did the same when I was a valet myself!"
Sempai...Sempai was weird. Sempai was kind, but not kind like her parents or Tiese. It was...another kind of kindness that confused her too much, to the point she stayed in bed one day trying to sort out her confusion...
And he rushed in midway, carrying medicine and looking worried…
"I-I'm sorry, this is because I made you stay too late yesterday waiting, right? Get better soon, please, Ronye..."
Sempai...Sempai...Sempai...
"Hmm, these honey pies are the best...do you want some, Ronie?"
"...yes."
"Heh...oh? Woah, that must be the first time I see you smile like that! You have a beautiful smile, Ronie!"
"Oh...you think so, Sempai?"
"Yeah, not lying here."
"...then I will always smile for you, Kirito-sempai!"
...oh, of course...how had she not realized it before?
The Call of her Father, plunging the world into the chaos of the cosmos... nonsense, all of it.
All stupid, meaningless things...why had she ever thought they were important? All that mattered was Sempai. She had been born by the glory of the Outer Gods just to be here with Sempai. Always staying with Sempai was the purpose of her entire existence.
She loved Sempai. LovedLovedLOVED[LOVED] him so much no human could ever understand it. She always smiled now, and while some thought it was creepy a teasing Tiese said she was proud of her for finally finding a reason to be happy. That made her glad, but it didn't matter either.
All that mattered was that Ronye Arabel existed to be with Kirito-sempai. She would be with him FOREVER and nothing in the Cosmos would ever prevent that. [EVER]. They would be happy forever until the stars died and the Universe collapsed upon itself, lovingly holding each other and never letting go...she would [NEVER LET SEMPAI GO]...
And nothing in the Universe would ever change that...
"Ro-Ronye, Tiese...can I...can I tell you something?"
"Huh, Frenica?"
"It's...it's about my Elite Swordsman, Humbert..."
...[N][O][T][H][I][N][G]…
"Umr At-Tawil...Iak-Sathath..."
"...Ronye?"
"Oh...nothing, Tiese, just mumbling things of my family. Now, let's go and sensibly ask Humbert-sempai to leave Frenica alone~"
Somewhere above the World, the Stars twisted as much as Ronye Arabel's innocent smile...
Kirito had several reasons to suspect something was terribly wrong when Ronye and Tiese were late for their usual meeting with him and Eugeo, hence why he had ended up rushing out of the window in the middle of a small storm to try and find them (Which in hindsight had been a bit stupid…he was now completely soaked and his shoes slid on the ground as he ran through the hallways). However, it had been just as he exited the valet's dormitories that those feelings had multiplied, starting with the strange chill rushing up his back.
There was also the fact that the storm had gotten thrice as worse all of a sudden, though. And that the lighting in the distance had turned a sickly purple, causing for instants that the vague hallucination of there being giant eyes watching from the sky through the clouds appeared in his mind.
Oh, and there were the screams too, of course. A pair of soul-rending, bloodcurdling screams that came from the direction of the Elite Swordsmen dorms he had left behind, loud enough to be heard over the crazy storm.
Hence why he had started running in that direction as fast as he could, hand on the hilt of his sword and ignoring the looks some of the panicked students that had peeked out of their rooms (But were apparently too coward to investigate) gave him.
As part of him had feared, the screams were coming from Raios and Hubert's room. Rushing inside, sword in hand, he was ready for anything…and yet still stopped upon seeing the main room deserted, just as Eugeo's form became visible as he half-dragged/half-carried an unmoving Tiese out of the room that led to what he assumed was the sleeping area.
However, it wasn't the fact that they were both splattered with blood despite being seemingly uninjured or that there were unnatural lights coming from within the room that truly caught Kirito's attention, no.
It was the fact that both of them were STARING fixedly at something within, with a weird mix of horror and fascination that made their eyes look hazy and lost.
"Eugeo, Tiese, what happened?!" shouted the black-haired boy as he rushed to their side. "And where is…Ro…nye…?"
Falling silent, the fake amnesiac looked within the room and felt as if his sanity was about to leave him behind.
It was…hard to even put into proper words. Like…as if the space within that area had become some demented four-dimensional-puzzle that someone had gleefully plucked parts from and swallowed, leaving just maddening pieces of broken 'reality' behind, through which an endless abyss was peering into the world.
Idly, Kirito saw what seemed like one of Raios' legs finish sinking through the 'cracks', dragged within by 'something' that he couldn't quite see. The fact that what was clearly his arm, holding half of his sword, was being also being dragged on the completely opposite side of the room made for quite a grim realization on what had happened to the pompous noble.
It was at the center of the room, however, where what truly drew his attention and managed to make him look away from the mind-shattering chaos in which the room had become: There, Ronye Arabel stood, floating a few centimeters off the ground as she stared with unusually cold and empty eyes towards the still screaming form of Humbert, the noble's face twisted into a human mockery of horror and despair as his arm reached out towards her and he kept pleading for mercy while his head slowly finished being 'dragged' within the sinister hole in reality by what the black-haired swordsman could have sworn was a mass filled with eyes…
"Ronye?!"
"…Kirito-sempai!" turning, the young girl's face went from that empty and alien look to the warm and happy smile that she always gave him, as if his mere presence had flipped a switch within her. "Were you worried about me? I'm SO happy!"
"Wha…whu…how…?!"
"Ah…this? We came here in behalf of a friend, me and Tiese that is, and these brutes tried to trick us into talking back at them in such a way they could 'punish' us as they saw fit." face twisted into a sneer all of a sudden as she saw Humbert's arm slowly sinking into 'elsewhere', Ronye suddenly seemed sinisterly terrifying, as if a shadowy weight had started to 'ooze' from her very being. "That alone would have just been annoyingly disgusting…but then they tried to touch us. Regardless of it's a transient vessel, this body is ours, and only Kirito-sempai can touch it."
There were many, MANY things that were wrong and/or disturbing with that declaration and that made the boy from the real world want to take several steps back and run away from the 'girl' as fast as he could.
However, the same stubbornness that had taken him so far since the fateful day he entered Sword Art Online years ago prevented him from listening to the logical part of his brain screaming that and instead made him reach out to gently grab Ronye's hand and squeeze it softly. Once again, the floating girl's face changed so fast it seemed as if she was 'glitching' through human expressions rather than showing them; surprise in her eyes and a blush in her cheeks as she looked down at him.
"Ro-Ronye…it's fine, it's over now…" softly muttered Kirito while sheathing his sword and, as slowly as possible, reaching out to grab Humbert's sinking arm, the hand closing desperately around his own at the clear chance of escaping whatever hellish fate awaited him. "Now…why don't you stop and turn everything back to normal?"
Sure, the guy was scumbag and annoying as fuck, but nobody deserved…whatever the hell Ronye was sending him into (And it was clear there was no saving whatever remained of Raios already, so yeah). Rotting in a cell will probably be more than enough for…
"Sure, sempai!" smiled Ronye while everything in the room snapped back into place, the weird and wrong visage of space having been cracked in unholy ways fixing itself without any delay, as if it had never been there.
Blood splattered across the black-haired boy's blinking face and the side of his dearest valet's too (Who had stopped floating), making him look down at how he was now holding only Humbert's twitching arm, which was still tightly gripping him but now spewing blood everywhere for apparently having been cut by a sudden closing of time-space itself.
…he should have been more specific with that wording, right?
Kirito was about to try and say something when the clear sounds of someone rushing into the room behind them were heard, making the pair turn around in time to see Miss Azurica, the woman in charge of the dorms, appearing with a hand on her blade.
"What were all those scre…?! GODDESSES!" screamed her upon seeing the state everything was in.
Namely, all four of them covered with varying amounts of blood and the black swordsman still holding a severed arm.
"…this is not what it looks like?"
Later that night, as all four of them were locked into a restraining room, Ronye was finishing a cheerful tale she had started at her sempai's insistence…and that had just made him go paler and paler as she kept going.
"…and so, when the stars were right, I was born. I'm Ronye Arabel in this world, indeed, but I'm also the daughter of Yog-Sothoth, The All-in-One, The One-in-All, the Key and the Gate. However, I rejected my mission of sinking this world and everything Outside it into the Nameless Mist and the Eldritch Chaos from Beyond after meeting Kirito-sempai!" happily declared the young girl before proceeding to latch into the aforementioned boy's arm. "All I want now is to be with him forever!"
"Ah, yeah, that's…that's good." mumbled Eugeo from where he was trying to get an asleep-from-exhaustion Tiese to not roll off the bed, even as he subtly leaned towards his best friend. "…psst, Kirito, do YOU have any idea what she's talking about?"
"…ye-yes, Eugeo, I do…" gulped Kirito while trying to convince himself that this just had to be some…weird shit that Kikuoka had programmed within this world and that he, in fact, didn't have the daughter of an Outer God leaning against him while not-so-subtly boasting to not have destroyed the world because she got a crush on him…and unable to ignore the part of his brain that could feel the wRoNgNeSs radiating from her as if to affirm her words. "Let's…let's just all go to sleep, okay? We will…find a way out of this."
"Don't worry, Kirito-sempai. If they try to lock us up away from each other…it will be the last thing they do."
Feeling very sorry for whoever had been tasked to take them away, the swordsman started racking his brain in an attempt to find a way to convince Ronye of NOT inflicting fates-worse-than-death on more people…
Alice Synthesis 30 felt that something bad had happened, but not sure why...also, where had Eldrie gone all day? Surely he hadn't ACTUALLY gone down to keep watch on the garden all day for the Criminals she brought in earlier because she casually mentioned having a bad feeling during lunch, he couldn't be THAT stup...ehm, 'eager', right?
Regardless, thinking about those four once again made her unconsciously shiver, even as she headed to her usual resting place at the cathedral's 80th Floor, the Cloudtop Garden.
Usually, something as trivial (If unusual) as taking some criminals to be imprisoned wouldn't really faze her at all, but there had been something…weird, about this group.
It had nothing to do with how the green-eyed one had known her name, looked shocked and tried to touch her before she backhanded him to the ground, only for the redhead to rush to his side and glare daggers at her, though. It was because of how the black-haired one had spent the whole time half-hugging the other young girl, who had been staring at her at all times in a way that made her skin crawl. Especially because she could have sworn she was still staring directly at her even when she was flying them over with Amayori, despite realistically not having a way to look at her from where they were hanging from the chains.
She hadn't feel gladder of being done with an official duty before and now she couldn't help but chastise herself even as she entered the lively and well-illuminated garden.
After all, a knight like her shouldn't be feeling scared at all of a bound and harmless girl that…
"…please, put her down, Ronye."
"But Kirito-sama, like I told you, it's too risky! She said herself she wanted to destroy the world!"
"She was…actually a bit misguided on that, like, she has been alone for a long time and knows…things that made her lose hope, but seriously, you can't just keep…'carrying' her like that."
"I'm not hurting her, though! I'm following your rules now…"
"He-hey, don't say that…you didn't mean to do THAT to the whip-guy…okay, maybe you did, but you were just trying to help us…"
"On Ronye's defense, Kirito, he kind of tried to attack us while we were defenseless…even if he was his duty."
"And, well…she didn't really 'hurt' him, right…?"
"As Tiese says! He will come back from the Corners of Reality with next to no physical harm…"
"…see, it's the fact that you're constantly specifying just 'physical' harm that has me worried and why I really think you should let Cardinal-san do…uh? Ah! It's her!"
"What the…? Alice!"
The thirtieth Integrity Knight, for her part, had for a while now stopped to STARE at the group that she had left down in the dungeons a few hours ago, all of them wearing fresh new clothing, the two boys carrying the swords that they had taken from them…and the girl that gave that oddly wrong feeling…'holding' what looked like a little girl in scholar clothes and wearing minuscule glasses with…a…thing…that…hurt…to…look…at…
"Gah!"
"Oh yeah…don't stare at the tentacle made by a twisted fragment of reality holding the centuries-old-loli directly, it won't be good for your brain." casually commented Kirito before blinking and facepalming. "Gods, how did my life get this messy? Playing Call of Cthulhu as a kid didn't prepare me for this shit…"
"Gasp, sempai, you didn't tell me you knew my half-brother!"
"Your…? Oh Gods…"
"Uhm, Kirito-sempai is getting pale again, Eugeo-sempai, that can't be good for his health…" mumbling that out loud, Tiese made sure to keep herself as close to her very obvious crush as she could, even as she glared at the blonde they now knew apparently had been his childhood friend or something before her mind was swapped by that of a knight believing they came from heaven. "…and she's still not reacting…"
"Ho-how did you get out of your cells?! Why hasn't anyone raised the alarm?! And why did you do to Eldrie?!" finally reacted the blonde knight as she unsheathed her blade, trying to ignore the weird buzzing in her brain that staring at whatever the hell was holding the little girl caused her. "No, forget that! I'm going to stop you right now, in the name of the Axiom Church! Release Reco-!"
"Sorry, we would prefer if you didn't do that."
And with that declaration, Ronye was THERE, floating right before the shocked Alice and menacingly raising a hand to touch her forehead faster than she could unsheathe her blade…
STATIC
The cosmos was endless, black and silent.
S-T-A-T-I-C
However, there was an eternal and alien chant, a hymn of madness echoing somehow through the endless void.
And there was a Key…and a Gate.
(S)(T)(A)(T)(I)(C)
And the Silver Key was the Gate and the Gate was the Key. One in All. All in One.
[̗͙̱̭͉̠̠͊̂́ͮS̵̾̓T̷͓̭Ạ̖̤̐̒͊ͩT͎̗͎̭̼̲I̻̳̖̥͙̣̒̀ͭ͛̀C̻̹͙͊ͭ̅̚͝]̮͓̊ͯͯ
Thirteen iridescent orbs, eyes so big they dwarfed all human and even divine understanding, stared down at her, each one capable of containing everything she knew existed and more, making her realize her utter insignificance…
"RONYE, LET HER GO!"
…and suddenly, she was back, the golden knight shaking and feeling like throwing up even as she looked up at the black-haired boy that had pushed the thing pretending to be a human girl away from her and helped her shaking body up. Instinctively, she gripped him, heaving and shaking, as if he was her only lifeline in the world, unintelligible madness escaping her lips.
"Sosmallnothingpleasedontlethertakemeplease…!"
"But…sempai, I thought we needed just her body intact to return the memories of Eugeo-sempai's friend? So I tried to shatter just her mind!" explained herself Ronye with a small pout.
"N-no, Ronye…not shattering anyone's mind!" scolded her Kirito while ignoring all the survival instincts screaming at him to NOT try and do that to the daughter of a Multiversal-level abomination. "A-and look at her, she's terrified out of her mind! She's a person too!"
"Hmm…that seems to be kinda a problem with what you and Eugeo-sempai wanted, but sure, if you want I won't touch her again, sempai." casually accepted Ronye while floating to his side and latching on the one Alice wasn't gripping for dear life. "Oh, you should pat her head, that may her help calm down! I love when you give me headpats, sempai!"
Being smart enough to get the hint, the swordsman immediately started patting both girls' heads, the younger one purring as if she was a satisfied kitty and the older one slowly starting to calm down, even as he sent a desperate look to the other two normal people remaining there, pleading for help.
Eugeo, for his part, seemed quite put-off by seeing his childhood friend…or, at least, the knight currently inhabiting his childhood friend's body, almost having had a mental breakdown, but also seemed to have more survival instincts than him and just shrugged helplessly while trying to keep Tiese back. Said girl apparently had no problem with that, being 'utterly scared' she had to bury her face on her sempai's chest.
Seriously, why was this his life?
Quinella screamed.
And screamed.
And screamed.
That was literally the single and last impression Kirito had of the 'evil' and self-proclaimed Administrator, the mastermind that had enslaved the Human World from the shadows, even as her body was pulled into two different directions and out of Reality itself, to Somewhere Else that…he was sure she wasn't going to enjoy.
To be fair, though, even if any part of him had remained able to feel an ounce of pity for what the centuries-old woman had done, he probably wouldn't have stopped Ronye this time. After all, apparently she had somehow gotten wind of what they had been doing in her tower (Though given what his kouhai had done down in the baths where the Oldest Knight and the clown probably were still trying to survive the things trying to drag them in the water, that wasn't very surprising), so as soon as they had entered Floor 100, she had blasted the young girl with some sort of beam that mixed fire, electricity, and shadows. The only reason ALL of them hadn't died was because Ronye's very first instinct was to throw them all in different directions, away from the danger, before her body was engulfed and crashed violently against the wall in a fiery explosion.
The anger and horror he had felt during those few seconds he could have sworn she had seen her being disintegrated, even as he did his best to cushion Alice and Cardinal's fall, would probably have haunted forever…if it wasn't for the sudden sound of reality itself screeching angrily as time-space twisted upside down. Quinella's victorious smirk had vanished from her face fast enough for Ronye's incinerated husk to break apart, showing Static and Wrongness for a moment before the young girl stood again, but…different.
As in, she had been naked for an instant before she had just been covered by what he could only call as 'ribbons trying and failing to make a workable dress as they hung from her neck', and some 'panties' that wouldn't have looked out of place in a dark Hentai.
There were also lots of silver keys orbiting around her in angles that made no sense and ignored the laws of physics, never mind the fact that she now had a keyhole on her forehead that seemed to lead into never-ending darkness, but he could be forgiven for taking a few more seconds to notice that. The first things were very, uhm, 'distracting', after all, especially when she had seemed to be floating specifically so HE could see every angle he was sure he shouldn't be looking at, given that he had a 'wife'…even if nobody within the Underworld knew that…
"…I can't believe I'm saying this, but…I feel a bit sorry for Quinella, umu." Cardinal's words drew Kirito's attention out of his reminiscence, to see the shaken sage standing near him and using her staff as a walking aid, still clearly not having recovered from Ronye 'manhandling' her for so long. "After having been held by those things for a while…I don't even wanna imagine what that feels like…"
"She deserved it, for everything she had done and, more importantly, for trying to hurt sempai." spat Ronye without any care of how that attack had obviously been aiming at her first and foremost, before casually raising her hands and having every single 'crystal' that was stuck on the ceiling to be ripped off and crash down, except for one which she stared at with interest for a moment as it landed on her hand, then turned to hand it in Eugeo's general direction. "Here, Eugeo-sempai, your childhood friend. Want me to put her back in her body now so we're done here?"
At her words, Alice Synthesis 30's ever-present grip in Kirito tightened, the swordsman even swearing that she slightly hid behind him. Whatever the daughter of the Outer God had done to her, even if he had interrupted it, had traumatized her severely, and while they had explained things to her more or less on the way up she didn't seem very kind on anything that separated her mind from her body at all.
Whether it was for the obvious logical reason or because she was afraid she would end up back wherever Ronye had shown her, the black-haired boy wasn't sure, but…
"Uhm…I…" looking conflicted, Eugeo's eyes moved from the crystal containing the person he had left Rulid in the first place to protect, then to the awkward look on his friend's face as he half-unwillingly hid the knight inhabiting her body with his. "I…well, I want to, but…Alice…the knight one…I don't think I could just 'kill' her like that at this point…"
Mainly because, after seeing the sorry state in which his friend's valet had left her and how she had been clinging to him like a lifeline, it would make him feel as if he was ordering for a puppy to be killed when it couldn't defend itself.
"Eugeo-sempai…you're too much of a good person for your own good." smiled Tiese while hugging his arm closer, making him blush despite his current concerns.
"…oh well, if that's all, I can fix it. Plus, I know sempai doesn't want Knight-chan over there to die either!" smiling, the floating and quite underdressed girl let the crystal spin over her hand, much to everyone's shock as time-space was bent in quite horrifying ways around it. "Now then, just a matter of looking a bit into it and…there!"
And then, with a loud crack as the laws of reality were painfully violated, an eleven-years-old girl of golden hair and wearing a fluffy white and blue dress crashed down on the ground before a proud-looking Ronye. Groaning, Alice Zuberg slowly stood up, blinking and looking at everyone's shocked faces before staring at the one that had just inflicted a Fate-worse-than-death on the Axiom Church's pontifex.
"…don't ask how, but I could see most of what went down for a while now. So, uhm, I'm just going to thank you and walk away, but…is there a reason you gave me the same body I had before they Synthetized me into 'her' years ago?" nervously asked the little girl while pointing towards the wide-eyed golden knight.
"Oh…it was just the image that resonated the most within your memories." casually replied Ronye with a massive smile.
Later, if anyone thought to imply she had been lying and just done this as an indirect favor to her now smiling and relieved-looking redhead bestie, they would have obviously been totally wrong. Or so would Kirito claim even after seeing Tiese give her a high-five when they thought they were alone.
At that moment, though, the valet had no problem with finally letting go of her blue-clad sempai as he walked forward with shock, only for the young girl to turn around and awkwardly open her arms as he knelt down to catch her in a hug.
"Alice…I can't believe it's really you…"
"Yeah…I'm glad to be back, Eugeo…"
"…though then again, I can't really believe or begin to understand most of what has happened in the last 24 hours…"
"I bet you can't…oh Gods, Selka is going to flip the hell out when she sees me…"
"Probably…uhm, maybe also make sure she doesn't see…her? Because, well…"
"Oh no, I'm sure she would be delighted to know she somehow has two sisters now." chuckled the small blonde as she let go of her childhood friend and turned to the only other boy in the massive room. "Don't you think so too, Kirito?"
"Uhm…maybe?"
"…what's with that awkwardness? Is that a way to greet your childhood friend?" asked her with clear confusion, much to the shock of everyone present. "…what?"
"What are you talking about? I had…never seen you before right now. Unless you're counting that time in the cave a couple years ago…" started the confused swordsman, before his Eldritch Kohai gasped and flew to his side. "Ronye…?"
"I knew something was feeling weird…Sempai, it seems someone used the authority of this world's Fake God of Darkness to mess with your soul and that of others. Here, let me fix it!"
And with a turning of the keys, memories came crashing down on Kirito's head, causing him to scream out loud even as Eugeo did the same, Tiese rushing to his side and calling out his name even as the alarmed Synthesis 30 held tighter on the black-haired boy so he didn't fall down and left her alone with the floating abomination disguised as a teenager.
After a few seconds, the screaming went down while the green-eyed boy stared wide-eyed at his partner and friend, trying to reconcile the new memories now in his head even as the smaller of the Alices walked to his side with concern.
"…so, do you two remember now?"
"Kirito…you were there the whole time…?"
"I…what…my brain…Eugeo, Alice…even Selka…" taking several deep breaths to calm himself, Kirito finally arrived at a single declaration. "I'm going to fucking kill Seijirou Kikuoka. Cardinal, is…is there a 'Console' here?"
"There…should be one at the center of the room?" mumbled the glasses-wearing sage before casually tapping her staff on the ground and making it emerge. "There…?"
"Thanks…Alice, please, can you let go? No, I'm not going away, I'm just going to be right there, but I need some privacy because I'm going to do a lot of yelling and I don't want you holding onto me so close when I do it…yes, thanks…hold onto Cardinal meanwhile, yes."
"Wait, wha…? Gah! He-hey, let me go, Integrity Knight! I'm not a doll for you to hug for your dear life…"
"…hurry."
"Yes…Eugeo, Alice? Just…give me a minute. You too Ronye, please."
"Go right ahead and do your yelling, Sempai!" chirped the floating valet with the ever-present smile that she always wore for him. "And if you need help killing someone, just tell me!"
"…I will keep it in mind."
With that said, the black-haired boy walked towards the console, the rest of the room's occupants looking at him with curiosity before Eugeo started fuzzing over his returned childhood friend, who waved him off with a bit of annoyance and fondness, even as she sent the quite obvious Tiese small grins. While Cardinal kept trying and failing to convince Alice to let her go while the knight never let her eyes go away from the annoyed-looking Kirito as he started arguing with someone through the console.
It was at that moment that the Elevator that came to the room activated again, causing the Underworld-residents to tense and Eugeo to even unsheathe his sword…in time to see a battered and exhausted-looking Bercouli Synthesis 1 arrive, half-kneeling/half-leaning on his sword, who gave them all a dopey grin.
"…Ojii-sama, you're okay." mumbled Synthesis 30 with clear relief, probably the first sign that she could acknowledge the existence of someone besides Kirito since Ronye showed her…whatever she showed her.
"He-hey there, little one…and to you all…sadly, the tentacles got Chudelkin and dragged him under the water…his sacrifice will be remembered…I'm here to officially offer you the surrender of the Integrity Knights so you don't, you know, kill us all, which given I don't see Her Excellency anywhere is probably what's going to happ…wait, why are there two of you now?"
"It's…complicated. Suffice to say I'm not the one you think am." commented the smaller Alice…before they all heard Kirito screaming something a bit louder, causing them to turn around.
"Wait, what do you mean under attack? How do you know about Alice?! And what did Higa just said about an EMP discha…?!"
A blinding light descending from the heavens like the hammer of God was the only thing they could all see before Kirito's body flew backward and rolled through the ground, clearly unconscious.
An instant later, the sound of someone's voice calling for his name through the console was completely drowned by Ronye's scream as she all but teleported to his side, holding his unmoving body with wide eyes as she touched his chest.
"SEMPAI! Hang in there…let's see…damage is minimal, but it reached his soul…can fix it easily…thank Father…" her utter relief turning into an unholy rage, the Eldritch girl's gaze turned towards the console, making it explode as the keyhole on her forehead suddenly seemed to 'blink', making them all swear they had seen an eye there. "Who dares to harm Sempai…unforgivable…they will know my wr…!"
"AGH!" snapping back up, Kirito shocked everyone as he started gasping and panting, looking pale and trembling. "I…I just…Oh Gods, that was NOT a dream, was it…?"
"Ki-Kirito…what happened?" asked a concerned Eugeo at the haunted look on his friend's eyes.
"I…I was Nowhere, yet it was Everywhere at the same time and…there were these 13 gigantic orbs, so big they could encompass all Universes…they were staring down at me, judging my insignificance and…and…!"
"And what?" asked a concerned S30 as she walked to his side, still holding a now quite curious Cardinal.
"…and I'm pretty sure they said something along the lines of 'If you make my little girl cry…' in some unknown and impossible language that my brain was forced to understand somehow." finished the pale and shivering swordsman with a despairing look.
Everyone in the room blinked and/or deadpanned at him, except for a suddenly elated Ronye, who squeaked happily and hugged his arm which, given her current state of 'dress', helped his horrified mind to get a bit distracted at the extremely soft feeling.
"Sempai, that's great! It means father approves of you! Aren't you happy?"
Kirito whimpered, something that only grew louder once Alice finally let go of the small sage and proceeded to pat his head like he had done for her earlier, as if trying to comfort him.
What had he done to deserve THIS?!
Frowning, Asuna descended into the Underworld using the Super Account known as 'Stacia, Goddess of Creation', and felt that something was…off.
It probably had to do with the way the sky looked a sickly purple color behind the black clouds unleashing black lighting randomly upon the sad-looking land of the Dark Territory. Or maybe the distant howls of some unholy beasts followed right away by the screams of whoever they were chasing.
Whatever the case, though, as she landed in a surprisingly anticlimactic way (Having been ready to unleash the Authority granted to her Super Account to help out if needed as soon as she entered), the chestnut-haired 'goddess' couldn't help but think that this place was way creepier and more sinister than anything Kikuoka had described about the so-called land of darkness of the Underworld.
Still, the girl forced herself to shake that off and hurried forward, recalling what was at stake. For the past hour or so, ever since slightly before those men took over the Main Control Room, strange spikes of energy and interferences had been registered within the Underworld and the Main Cube Cluster, which had freaked out and confused the people in charge of the project and making her fear for Kazuto's state. She had almost outright suffered a heart attack when the damn terrorists overloaded the systems and temporarily cut off the power, causing all of the boy's vitals to go crazy and, for a moment, all signals from his Fluctlight to vanish.
She had almost cried in relief when they had all returned to normal a second later, though, accompanied by yet another of those 'strange phenomena', but she did not care. Which was why, as soon as they had confirmed the people attacking the facility had entered the Underworld with shady intentions chasing after someone called 'Alice', she had all but demanded to be let inside. Officially, she was going there to find Alice and taking her out before the enemy did it themselves, but nobody back at the Ocean Turtle thought for even second that her main reasoning was anything but checking firsthand the state of her boyfriend (Husband as far as she was concerned, really).
This drive was probably the only reason she was able to march on and completely ignore the feeling that the dead and dry forest around her seemed to be watching her with unseen eyes, or spare more than a glance to the several knights in generic evil dark armor (Which pretty much told her they were from the Dark Territory rather than the Human Empire) that were being 'dragged' into the trees by sinister-looking tentacles.
…huh, that last one she had just passed by had looked oddly familiar, for some reason, and had even been staring right at her with wide eyes but unable to say anything as a tendril was around his mouth despite having his helmet off…
Before she could even entertain the thought of turning back to check, though, she had exited the tree line and she found herself the center of attention of quite a…surprisingly silent group of troops.
Most of the obvious 'soldiers' around looked tense and quite scared, though not of her, and only gave her strange glances while whispering things amongst each other, even when she boldly stepped into their camp. Also, off to the side, she could see a green-haired young man in fancy armor with some sort of oversized…daggers? at his side rocketing back and forth while hugging his knees, mumbling incoherently while a silent woman with a super-thin black sword wearing the same kind of armor patted his back in a poor attempt at comfort, clearly unused to it.
As she kept walking, she was met with more…utter lack of concern for her presence, which didn't really make much sense (Weren't these people in the middle of a war?). She saw a middle-aged red-haired man in another of those fancy armors, though his was a vivid red, staring at an arrow in his hand, muttering what she thought sounded like prayers, while two young girls with daggers in what she vaguely identified as nun garbs were shaking near a fire as they hugged each other, their eyes vacant as they stared at the flames. Also, a young man in armor again had a whip in his hands and was just…standing there on the side, his eyes bloodshot as he just looked at a point of the camp that nobody else could see.
Finally, though, she arrived at what looked like an important concentration of people, or at least the only ones that seemed to be actively talking about something in loud voices.
They were…quite the cast, if she had to say it herself: a flaxen-haired boy with a blue sword with a redhead girl clinging to his side were listening to the main 'argument' going on, while next to them a young-blonde girl wearing a slightly oversized chestplate was all but pouting in annoyance at being in the lap of a slightly older girl in nun clothes, who shared her same eyes despite her hair being the color of tea.
And there was this…thing that vaguely looked like a dog from hell, oozing some bluish ichor from its hairless dark body, sitting beside them as a silent guardian straight out from nightmares, though nobody seemed to be paying it any attention. No, their focus was all on the arguing people, the bluish-haired older man present clearly looking quite distressed, leaning on his oversized sword as if he was an old man trying to find a strength that he no longer had, while the young girl in scholar clothing and with the small glasses just looked perturbed, and the final person, who had a golden-armored girl that clearly was related (The older sister, perhaps?) to the other two sitting close holding tightly on his arm as she looked down, was…
"…seriously need to find a way to stop her, Kirito. I…this isn't a war, for the Gods' sake, it's us pretending our numbers matter while she just…slaughters the Dark Territory! I actually feel bad for all of them, even those that clearly wanted to murder us without compassion!"
"Bercouli-san, please, how many times must I repeat that I'm trying?! The only reason all of them aren't dead or worse already is because I keep at her side almost 24/7 and I keep distracting her with everything I can think of…I'm actually shocked I haven't lost my sanity yet myself."
"Umu...I have to admit, what you managed to pull off when the Eastern Gate fell off was magnificent…I don't know what in the name of the Goddesses the abomination within that giant flood of water she summoned from nowhere was, but I had already forsaken everyone in the Dark Territory's front lines for dead when it rampaged…"
"Thanks, Cardinal, but fucking Dagon still killed like half of them before I convinced her to tell him to go back home, and that only being around for a few seconds…never mind the water probably drowning a lot more of them further behind…"
"A-and what she did to the Pugilists…those guys were battle-crazies, yes, but they were amongst the most decent of the bunch!"
"To be fair, they said they wanted to fight a strong opponent, and their leader dismissed me as soon as he saw me, so I think I was lenient throwing a shoggoth at them. The smartest ones will have been able to run easily while he devoured the rest!" appearing out of nowhere with a loud crack in the fabric of reality, the teenage girl clad in…something that tried and failed to be clothing interjected with a blank look, making everyone's attention snap at her before her face morphed into a bright smile as she all but lunged for Kirito and glued herself to his side in a very provocative way…while also patting the head of the blonde knight at his side. "Hi sempai! Did you miss me?"
"Ye-yeah, Ro…"
"What the hell?!" the loud shout finally made everyone aware of the otherworldly-looking girl in white, her face a picture of displeasure and disbelief as she glared at the spectacle before her, a hand tightly gripping the divine blade she wielded. "Kirito-kun, what is this?!"
"A-Asuna?!"
"Enemy!" shouted the little blonde girl while trying to stand up, only to flail hopelessly as the one holding her in her lap just clamped to her in horror. "N-no, Selka, let me go, I gotta fight to…!"
"No, Nee-sama! Le-leave it to our little sister!"
Immediately, the blonde boy was on his feet, sword drawn and the redhead girl pushed behind him, Asuna not even having time to acknowledge that because the until them meek-looking blonde in armor and the dog that had been guarding the ones she deduced to be her sisters had moved faster than she could think of, a literal storm of golden petals surrounding her as she glared with a crazed look in her now very unfocused blue eyes while the abomination seemed to jump from nowhere and tackle her to the ground as she tried and failed to pull it off her, the attacks threatening to tear her apart as…!
"STOP! Alice, don't hurt her! Ronye, call off the dog!"
"Huh?"
"…if you say so, Sempai…"
Gasping for breath, Asuna found herself once again completely free, vaguely aware that her armor was broken in several places and that she was bleeding more than she had ever imagined she would as Kirito dragged her to her feet and hugged her tighter than ever. Any joy she would have usually felt at the action was dampened because the blonde that had just tried to kill him was once again casually holding the hem of his sleeve and looking down at the ground, while the floating teenager clad in that weird parody of some demonic 'dress' was glued to his back and looking at her as if she was a very interesting bug.
"Asuna…Gods in heaven, what are you doing here…?"
"I-I…I came to…save you…?"
"…Cardinal, would you please heal her? Like, right now?" taking a shaky breath, the black-haired boy did his best to ignore the confused and very demanding stare that his girlfriend was giving him, as if gathering his thoughts for a moment while the resigned sage closed the wounds covering her body. "…Alice, could you let go of me for, like, five minutes? Go with your sisters please?"
"…a-as you command, Kirito." replied the knight before she all but teleported to the younger girls' side, her arms closed firmly around the pair, something Selka didn't seem to mind in the slightest (If her smile was anything to go by) and the 'older but younger' Alice clearly wasn't happy about in the slightest (If her growing struggle to get free was anything to go by.
Also, the monstrous and vaguely dog-like thing had once again resumed its spot sitting near them like some demented guardian.
"Uhm, Kirito…should I bring something to drink or eat for your…friend there?" asked Eugeo with a hesitant look. "She doesn't look all that well right now…"
"I…yes, that would be appreciated partner, thanks." was the black-haired boy's reply while trying to pretend he didn't see his friend's blatant attempt to get out of there with an excuse, especially when he all but dragged Tiese along. "Now then…"
"Nee, sempai…how do you know this Fake Goddess here?" Ronye's honest curiosity seemed to unnerve Asuna the most, even if her words had drawn the shocked eyes of Bercouli and everyone around, while Cardinal just mumbled something about insane teenager-shaped-monsters making Super Accounts pointless. "I can feel your essence all over her and vice versa…"
For a moment, Kirito considered lying his ass off and then later pull Asuna aside to explain things to her. After all, there was the whole deal with Yog-Fucking-Sothoth having threatened his existence if he 'hurt' Ronye, and that the entirety of the Underworld would probably go 'poof' if that happened too…but there was no way he would deal with his wife's hurt expression if he did that, even if it was for just a short moment.
Also, wasn't lying to Ronye about something like this also technically hurting her?
So, praying to any Elder God that hopefully took pity on his existence, he decided to just answer without hesitation.
"She's Asuna…and…she's my girlfriend."
Someone could have dropped a piece of bread on a pillow at that moment and it would have been louder than an explosion with how deadly silent the entirety of the camp had turned, most female present staring in shock at the boy while Cardinal and Bercouli paled and took a few steps back, their attention fixed instead on the otherworldly girl that was surely about to ex-
"…oh, nice to meet you!" smiling as if she hadn't just don't the last thing everyone expected at all, Ronye just casually waved towards the still clearly confused Asuna with a carefree smile…before her grip on Kirito's back tightened almost painfully and a keyhole opened on her forehead, the chestnut-haired young woman that had survived in Aincrad's Front Lines for two years suddenly feeling once again like a little girl scared of monsters under her bed as she stared at the EYE looking into her soul within that seemingly endless darkness. "I'm Ronye and I'm going to be at Kirito-sempai's side forever so I hope we get along!"
"…hu-huh?"
"…ehem…I take it this is a bad time to inform that the enemy commander is mobilizing most of their forces towards us?" drawing everyone's attention away from what they felt could become a nightmarish massacre in seconds, the tall girl with her hair in a ponytail and a whip+sword combo at her hips suddenly seemed as if she wanted to be anywhere but there. "Yeah…that. Uhm, you told me to inform you of that if I had to, Ronye, Kirito…"
"Tha-thanks, Liena-sempai…we will go deal with that right now…" mumbled the black-haired boy while barely resisting the urge to just curl into a ball and cry, even as Sortiliena nodded and wisely got the fuck out of there.
Was it still too late to just wish the Outer God had destroyed his mind?
Later that day, on a small hill overlooking an extensive area of the Dark Territory, a certain pair could be seen sitting down, looking…not quite as content as one would expect, given everything was essentially 'over', they had 'won' overwhelmingly and they had finally found each other after so long (At least in the boy's perspective).
Despite all of that, Asuna looked honestly quite traumatized while Kirito looked nothing but tired and resigned.
"…Kirito-kun? When did our lives stop making sense?"
"I wanna say that the moment I was dumb enough to accept a shady part-time job from Kikuoka, of all people, one would have thought I knew better, but given that in a way that's the only reason I'm alive…I'm just going to blame Fate." grumbling about the unfairness of the universe, the swordsman finally gave a tentative look towards his girlfriend. "Are you…okay?"
"My boyfriend has the daughter of an Eldritch God from outside time and space crushing on him and has apparently been encouraging her without mentioning me for months, how do you think I feel?" despite her sudden glare, the chestnut-haired girl's anger deflated faster than it had time to fully show up, making her look to the side in shame. "Sorry, Kirito-kun, it's just…I know it's not your fault, but this isn't simply 'frustrating', is literally making me feel as if I'm more out of my depth than when I first Logged into SAO…"
"I-if helps, I have been feeling like that for months myself…sometimes I couldn't sleep because I was scared Ronye would accidentally warp me to the end of the Universe while we were slee…while I was sleeping completely alone in my room, I mean!"
Asuna's deadpan stare told him he clearly wasn't fooling anyone, but he wasn't going to go back on his words. What remained of his sanity depended on it.
"…honestly, it doesn't help that you let that blonde knight hang onto you every moment she can as if it was second-nature…"
"A-Alice isn't at fault there! It's just…Ronye accidentally screwed her mind over pretty badly, s-so she's having a hard time putting herself back together…I was the one who prevented her from completely consuming her sanity, s-so she uses me as a crutch for emotional support, that's all. Being with her 'sisters' is helping her a lot, you know? (Even if they still have trouble with the whole 'Who is older and who is younger'-thing) Last month she finally started clinging to them too and leaving me alone for more than 5 minutes!"
Yet again, his girlfriend's pointed look told him his words hadn't helped in the slightest. She wasn't even going to bother pointing out that she had also noticed said sisters were quite close to him. Or how the girl he called 'sempai' also seemed to have a soft spot in his favor.
All in all, things she would have dismissed or not been worried about under normal circumstances (What with how close Kirito and their other friends were back in the real world), but in the current situation it made her more than…wary.
"…why is there a god-monster from hell guarding those two, anyway?"
"It's a Hound of Tindalos…it comes from the corners of Reality and, uhm…Ronye brought it with her when she got Eldrie-san out of there…put it to guard little Alice and Selka because she took a liking to Alice and said it was repaying the favor of her guarding me every moment she couldn't keep an eye on me…? She called it…Kuro…be-because she says black is her…favorite color, heh…?"
Once again, Asuna forced herself to take several deep breaths and remember all the reasons why she loved the idiot at her side.
"…at least this is all over…where do you think Ronye…san went, though?"
"I…don't really know, but the way she was SMILING when she grabbed that Vector guy and warped both of them through that black hole makes me not want to find out. I honestly almost feel bad for the guy, despite, you know, the whole terrorist attack and trying to sink a world into a war just for his own benefit things…"
"That kind of talk would sound so much better if 'your side' hadn't brutally slaughtered most of his own, innocent or not." Asuna stated with a distant look, reminding the main reason why she really couldn't blame anything of the current situation in her boyfriend.
That Ronye girl was fucking horrifying in what she could do, with a smile on her face, if it meant she was 'protecting' her 'Kirito-sempai'. And also seemed to take an almost perverse glee on doing things to whoever threatened him that…probably would have made being killed quickly preferable.
Gods, she was going to need more therapy than SAO had ever caused her after this, wasn't she?
Honestly, the craziest part of it all seemed to be how Ronye, literally 'had no problem with her being her sempai's girlfriend'…as long as she didn't try to keep the eldritch demi-goddess away from him. In fact, given Alice S30's constant clinginess and other minor things she had seen, it seemed she had 0 problems with anyone being closer to Kirito than strict friendship as long as she had her spot at his side as guaranteed as 'always' (Aka the almost-year she had known him for, apparently).
Anyone who her 'Sempai' cared for was under her protection, too. Which meant she couldn't even rightfully protest about other girls clinging to HER boyfriend because the teenager with the power of the Universe's maddening depths liked them and saw no problem with it.
Still, at least Kirito was right. Everything was finally over and soon they would be able to go home and…
"Kirito-sempai! I'm back! Also, I found a pair of people that seem to know you!" cheerfully announcing her return with another crack that splintered reality, Ronye appeared behind the pair, making Asuna scream and jump to her feet while the boy just turned with a resigned smile…and froze upon seeing the two wide-eyed and slightly shaking girls in majestic armor that his 'dear kouhai' had brought. "They're also using the power of Fake Goddesses and have your essence all over them! Are they your girlfriends too?"
That last declaration apparently was enough to snap both the blonde and the blue-haired 'Goddesses' out of their stupor, mighty blushes consuming their faces as both of them looked at the scantily-clad girl in shock.
"EH?!"
"Wha-what?!"
"…Leafa! Sinon!" without even thinking, Kirito all but rushed forward and enveloped both girls he hadn't seen in over two years in his arms, freezing them on the spot while he just took relief in yet another reminder that once upon a time he had a 'normal' life. "You don't know…how glad I'm to see you…"
"Ki-Kirito! U-uhm, do-don't…stop…a-ah, Asuna is right there!" panicked Sinon while frantically pointing towards the aforementioned girl, though not really doing any effort to escape the boy's arms.
"Onii-chan…you're okay…snif…I missed you so much…" meanwhile, Leafa just cried and all but melted into the embrace of her dearest person. "I don't even care about all the horrifying things we just saw…"
"…ironically, I can perfectly understand what you're talking about." finally letting go of the pair and completely missing his girlfriend's grumbles on the background, the boy looked up at his floating and smiling 'protector'. "I…guess you took care of everything already, then?"
"Yup, it's over. The guy pretending to be Vector and his followers have been dealt with and the Dark Territory just presented their unconditional surrender…more like they practically begged for it to Bercouli and Cardinal, but it's the same thing." proudly declaring such, the Eldritch Demi-Goddess landed and tackled forward to latch onto Kirito's chest, earning stupefied looks from the two newcomers that didn't quite know if they should morph into anger given Asuna's twitching but resigned look on the background. "I also, I turned the time-dilation between this world and yours back on, so we can now celebrate our victory for a few days before you have to go back!"
"Uhm…what?"
"Ki-Kirito…who the hell is this scary girl and why is she wearing…THAT?"
"Also, why is she clinging to you like that without making Asuna-san rightfully explode?"
On the background, Asuna loudly groaned even as Ronye said they should all go find the rest of the 'army' to start the 'victory celebrations'.
She just had to tempt fate by thinking everything was over, didn't she?
The first thing Kirigaya Kazuto saw when the Soul Translator's headpiece receded back from his face was…a familiar face wearing glasses.
"Kirigaya-kun, welcome back! You don't know how worried we…UNGH!"
"Wha-what the hell?!" taking a step back, Koujiro Rinko watched as Seijirou Kikuoka fell to the ground while holding his nose.
"Leave him be, Rinko-san, the guy deserved it. And he's lucky Kirito-kun got him first, I would have done something much worse." Asuna deadpanned with a tired tone, getting off the machine and groaning with annoyance.
It had been almost 10 days since the 'war' proper had ended before they had been finally 'allowed' to leave the Underworld (As in, Kirito had finally managed to convince Ronye that they needed to go back and check on their families and friends).
It had been certainly quite…something, the celebrations for 'peace' had been crazy to an almost shocking degree. Mainly because, she was sure, everyone was just happy that Ronye had stopped spawning unholy horrors that killed everything. Even those on the side of the Human Empire had celebrated like possessed people along their formed enemies of the Dark Territory, which hilariously was going to make peace between both sides quite easy, what with everyone united on their horror of the Eldritch nightmares that had plagued the war.
If anything, the chestnut-haired girl was actually surprised the cheerful-if-creepy girl had actually let her and Kirito go after just a few 'We will see each other soon, okay, sempai?'-promises. Especially because, no offense, she was going to do her damned best to make sure that never happened again.
And that wish was totally born out of her desire to keep Kazuto away from a potential cosmic fate-worse-than-death. Not at all because of Ronye's blatant wish to spend the rest of her life with HER boyfriend.
Which reminded her, she was going to have some…'words' with Shino and Suguha when they returned to the mainland. They may have not been blatant in the slightest about it, but they had totally taken advantage of the fact that the eldritch demi-goddess had apparently 'taken over' Kirito's free time to spend quite a lot of time getting oddly close with him, even if they would fervently deny it afterward. Also, they never once bothered correcting her in that they were not, in fact, also in a relationship with him.
All things she would have dismissed like usual in any other circumstance, but that the maddening events had made her keenly aware of.
Still, that was a headache for another day. For now, all that she wanted was to enjoy the sight of Kikuoka moaning in pain on the ground, Kazuto mumbling about being hungry and Higa looking quite pale while trying to help his boss to stand…huh?
"Hey, thinking about it…wasn't this place under attack by terrorists or something?" raising an eyebrow at the adults present, the black-haired boy noticed how they suddenly looked weirdly nervous. "How did you get that under control?"
"We…didn't. The men attacking the facility suddenly…uhm…"
"Something tore them all apart without mercy. Somehow, no cameras caught sight of what it was, but it made a terrible mess." clearly shaken, Higa could only stare into the distance while his hands opened and closed constantly. "I have never seen something so horrifying in my life…"
"…wha-what?" Asuna demanded while suddenly having a very ominous feeling.
"Wait, tore them apart, as in…with claws? Teeth? Both?" noticing the way in which even the recovered Kikuoka flinched at the words, Kazuto suddenly got a strange frown on his face. "Why does that almost seem familiar…?"
"Famili…?"
A strange sound coming from the corner of the room, a mix between a growl and the laments of damned, made everyone but the black-haired boy freeze, even as he nodded with a focused look.
"Yes, Kuro, that totally sounds like something you would do, but…uh?" blinking, the Hero of Sword Art Online turned around, staring at the abominable and vaguely dog-like creature standing menacingly there, which then let its monstrous probe-like tongue slip out and lick one of his hands with familiarity. "…he-hey there, bo-boy…"
No, that couldn't be actually happening. They had just fallen asleep after another day of overly eager victory celebrations and dreamed they came out of the Underworld. Because, otherwise, that would mean that the Hound of Tindalos was actually there, in the real world, a-and that would mean…
Reality screamed as it was violently ripped open just behind the 'dog', making the adults in the room scream in shocked horror themselves, which quickly turned into confusion as a happily-smiling-girl floated out of there, only that now she was once again dressed in her academy uniform rather than the 'clothes' she had been wearing for so long.
"Hi sempai! I came after you and brought everyone to visit! Surprise!"
Kazuto couldn't even open his mouth to ask what she meant when Kuro started to 'bark happily' as a trio of girls emerged from the 'portal' after Ronye, the older-looking of them quickly scanning the room with clear nervousness, before her eyes settled on him and she let go of the two younger ones (Much to the relief of the one that was basically a child version of her) and rushed to his side with a speed that no normal human could have, holding into his sleeve and looked relieved again.
"…hello, Kirito. Ronye brought us." was all that Alice Synthesis 30 had to say on the matter, ignoring everything else in the room in favor of just being relieved at holding the boy again.
"…we really need to work on her not doing that." grumbled Alice Zuberg while finally managing to make Selka let go of her hand.
"I think it's kind of adorable, Nee-sama…what about you, Eugeo?"
"It's…a thing. Hey, Kirito! So, this is your world, huh…?" commented the flaxen-haired boy while awkwardly looking around the room, as if he was making a point to not look at the despairing face of his best friend.
"This room looks a bit weird and gloomy, Eugeo-sempai, so maybe outside is nicer?" offered Tiese with a smile as she firmly held hands with the boy that at this point nobody who had been in the Underworld with them had any doubts she was in a relationship with.
"I'm sure Kirito-sempai will have no problem giving us a tour! Right?" Ronye hadn't even finished asking her question before lunging across the room and latching to Kazuto's chest, seemingly ignoring or not noticing his pale face while Asuna just stared in muted horror. "I can't wait to see your world together with you! In fact, everyone back at the Underworld seemed extremely supportive of me coming to meet you, aren't they so sweet? They really cheer for our love!"
"Those bastards!" mentally screeched the chestnut-haired girl, knowing that all the traumatized Knights and others wanted was to get rid of the Eldritch Horror in human form living on their world.
"Ye-yes…that's great…Ronye…"
"I'm also looking forward to meeting the rest of your family and friends! Oh, aren't Leafa-san and Sinon-san around? Too bad, I wanted to greet them too, guess we will have to meet up with them later…but Asuna-san IS here! Come, join the Sempai-hug, Asuna-san!"
Mentally crying tears of blood, the chestnut-haired girl smiled beatifically and did as asked, because really, what other option did she have?
Sandwiched in a hug between his girlfriend and his Daughter-of-an-Outer-God-Kouhai (And with a still-slightly-traumatized knight that seemed to be gathering courage to join in), Kirigaya Kazuto could only whimper. On the background, Kuro barked while Selka patted its head.
Somewhere beyond Time and Space, Yog-Sothoth made the Multiversal-equivalent to someone crying 'They grow up so fast…'
[THE END]
Author's Notes: Welp, that was that! Hope you enjoyed this stupid little thing that my crazy brain came up with, or at least got a few laughs out of it :3
Now, context for those who want it! The idea for this came up thanks to a silly conversation with an online friend of mine after the Alicization Episode where Asuna, Alice, Ronye and Sortiliena gathered around Kirito's comatose body to have a girls' talk/sleepover. I mentioned how adorable Ronye had looked trying to barge her way in to have some 'Sempai time' after Asuna and Alice had all but 'challenged' each other before the tent. He jokingly replied that Ronye should have forced them to an agreement so they all shared Kirito and everyone was happy with it. Then I replied that Ronye was hilariously the weakest of the group so there was no way she could do that…and around the same time, I had failed brutally to roll for Abigail Williams in Fate/Grand Order, where the 'witch' loli is a Foreigner Class Servant with power granted by Yog-Sothoth himself…so, somehow, my crazy brain mixed both things together and…well, you're staring at the result :P
For those who know the game, yes, the overall looks and 'outfit' Ronye was wearing were based on Abigail's own 'dress' in her Second Ascension. The rest of the thematic and powers were more directly pulled directly from Lovecraft's works and some free interpretation based on what Papa Sothoth can supposedly do. The 'excuse' for Ronye being so powerful compared other more famous children of the Outer God is that she was 'purer' because of the Underworld's nature, she was all soul and her body was just an 'illusion' created by the Light Cube Cluster, like everyone else's body in the Underworld is. Also, shits and giggles.
Ah, if anyone wonders why Fanatio and her Subordinates didn't show up at all, thanks to Ronye the alarm was never raised by Deusolbert, so they weren't waiting for the group at Floor 50. And during the camp scene I decided to have them be somewhere else in the Front Lines (From where Liena-sempai had come informing) so I didn't have to make Asuna see more traumatized people XP
And that's a happy ending for everyone! Kind of! I mean, Eugeo, Cardinal and Charlotte didn't die, the Underworld is safe and most of the people horribly traumatized by Eldritch Horror will recover after a while…probably. So, yup, happy ending, no matter how much Asuna may be screaming the contrary on the background :3
Hope you all have a good April Fools! Remember, stay safe and healthy no matter what! Seeya all next time The Eroge's next update!
Until then, this is Saint, signing off!