Author note: Please show your truthful feelings towards this, if you want more works. This needs comments. I don't care if it's positive or negative; I just need the feedback to learn and grow. Attacking me, though, is not appreciated, though. This is a short and something quick with the possibility if you want another or a longer running fic with this ship? you need to give this fic attention like with everything else. I don't like writing for the dead air. Show that this story is something that you want. I know I sound shameless, but I've had enough of writing something that others love and feel like their views are enough. I own nothing but the laptop I write this on.
I watched my environment from afar at first. Because in a sea of uninteresting faces, yours seem to marvel and fascinated by everything around you. A paradox Both bewildered and knowledgeable you stood. With wild tresses of brown and quickly, I focused on you because you seemed genuinely intriguing person. An oxymoron is innocent but wise enough. With others sanding
I heard her name and knew it would be difficult. My status and yours as a muggle-born but hearing the hat scream, Gryffindor? That would make things more complicated. I'm destined for Ravenclaw, but I still have a shot at friendship with her, my turn being one of the last students all eyes on me.
A curious mind ambitious cunning, sly mind ah I see no doubt about its wit beyond measure, but that thirst greatness overshadows it by leaps and bounds, the hat spoke in mind I remember it as clear as day as I would hear her giggle on a summer's day. The memory of those words that changed my chances of getting to know her. Slytherin!
I could feel my heart crushed into a thousand pieces; the rivalry wouldn't make it impossible.
The thought I had as an 11 year, and I kept watching and waiting for the opportunity to make my move. My heart was wrenching when I realized that she was in danger, and I couldn't do anything but be a silent observer. Even though she didn't know it, I was one of her visitors when she was petrified, and I talked to her I had tears in my eyes wondering about what had done this to her. My eyes were searching her face wondering if she felt pain or dreamed. That summer, I wondered if she would leave Hogwarts never to returned I had never felt myself fall into a deeper pit of despair.
When the first Hogsmeade trip came, I try to find the nerve to ask her. Still, I lost the courage and sent her a note anonymously as a secret admirer. That I have no doubt, she assumed it was a joke.
I gave her the time to meet me, and there I stood heart in hand knees quaking. She didn't believe I was serious, so I watched her as i always did. Still, I knew she was watching me too, at least until she was too harried and overwhelmed. I knew something was wrong. Her hair that I had found as untamed beauty like she was had lost its normal luster. The thick bag under her eyes, showing her lack of sleep. From the network of gossip within Slytherin, I knew she was in all the electives offered. And from the way she was going, she was an inch away from a breakdown. She couldn't have taken all the elective classes at once. And that glaring fact had gotten the Slytherin and Ravenclaw dorms a flutter with theories on how she was able to do so at all. I wanted to know what was wrong, but any time I was approached, she wasn't alone, and it became easier to watch out from the shadows. Protection that I would give from the shadows and with the hope that one day? When things finally settled down, I can make my intentions possibility, telling her flat out what my heart feels.
I watched 4th year even though I wasn't fast enough to ask her to the Yule ball first Krum did just as I got the nerve to ask her in person. Still, I was already out of her radar. I wasn't a suspect of anything just another Slytherin to them, but I did by the end of the year pay for the firing of Rita Skeeter, never forgetting Hermione, her tears, and how harshly harassed and hurt. Nor making trouble for Draco and Snape. Consider the amount of bleeding and the pain caused to her fourth year. I always feel my heart tare at the amount of pain she put up with that year alone, especially when Potter couldn't just refute the claims with a legitimate reporter interviewing him about the rumor-mongering the fact that it didn't even come to mind doesn't shock me. If it wasn't for her, the idiot would 8 feet under.
Fifth-year, I decide being a silent observer was now out of the question, with Voldemort back? It's clear I need to be active and ask her directly. Try to help as much as I could. The only time I could talk to her without causing a disturbance within ancient runes and asked if she was willing to have Slytherins that aren't a part of the insanity that is Umbridge in her defense spell learning club. At the same time, she was prepared. I had to create time distraction during the time we were learning. it kept them busy, especially the dung bomb explosions in her office or the vigorous vines trap that attacked anyone going to her class near prefects meeting rooms and baths. that would regrow daily. It slowed her down especially when she became headmistress
She thanked me, I knew at that moment when I saw that brilliant smile and I knew that I wanted to see more of it. Though the minute, the forced recruitment within Umbridge's inquisitor squad me and those Slytherin were booted for fear of being used by Umbridge. Even though we signed the paper, it didn't matter we knew by then that Umbridge used torture as a method to get information never forget self-preservation was a tenant of Slytherin. I would rather die than give up her secrets but the others I doubt it, and for that, I don't blame her.
The sixth-year I tried to return to shadows we were still in a time of war and crisis as it stood my mother was packing our home and setting us both of us up in New York City until the war is over. But the new potions professor gave me my dearest wish, and that's what made everything so much worse by next summer I wouldn't see her for a very long time. Another reason to interact with her through his social club. Though I had been in denial, trying to distance my heart, I tried moving on. To the glee of many a Ravenclaw, Hufflepuff, and Slytherin girls, but it's meaningless. They were meaningless. It's like comparing puddles to an ocean. The love I felt, the desire to have her smile at me the way she does her friends.
To know her love for me and know my love was returned and I knew my time was growing thin and with Slughorn's club and knowing she was there I had a chance remote as it was to get her to notice me and I didn't take it, and that's one of my biggest regrets. Nothing worse than seeing her go to the Slughorn party with Cormac McLagan. Then it seems like a fever pitch everything I knew about what was going on with Draco.
What I knew was coming the worst part is even if I went and just snatched her, it wouldn't matter; they would find her and take her back. Also, if I wanted to so desperately save her from this war, I knew I could never come back to England if I did.
Right before I left on that on that portkey going all the way to New York City. I sent her an owl anonymously. It was one of the few times that I used the local owl office. I sent her a necklace of protection. It would cloak her. It would protect her, and it would heal her. It wasn't perfect there was ways to kind of circumvent certain parts of the enchantment but around her? it would create a barrier against the elements it would help her if she was going through the worst of it, but I had a bracelet that told me it kind of fed me other information from it. I know it was wrong; I know it's an invasion of her privacy, but at the same time? It gave me an idea if she was still alive even if I never got another letter from my friends and comrades telling me about her. In case I could never come back to Britain. I could warn myself in my own way before I died in agony of wanting her. Even if I never saw her again, I knew she had a piece of me with her, and it would still be on her person. I kind of put a slight compulsion on it so that she would put it on. I know it seems wrong, And I know it seems too much. But like how I knew my own name, I also knew that I loved her with all my heart with all my soul, and I would never, and I do mean ever love another woman like I loved and love Hermione Granger. She needed something while the world was hunting her down.
Without her, Harry Potter would be dead. How was he supposed to survive on the run without her? He could survive without the weasel, but he wasn't going to survive without her. She was the brains, and it was clear as day that he didn't have the brains to figure anything out on his own. It made my blood boil, but I had no choice but to let fate work it out if she died. I would soon follow regardless of anything else I don't think I could survive knowing that I could never ever tell her how I felt or how I've always felt. And now that everything is over at the dust had settled, I was going to confront her probably the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
For all I know, she's dating that weasel. Or worse, she was dating the golden boy himself. How my supposed to know one thing she was good to act like myself was keeping her private life just that private
Right now, it's only been a month since the war ended. I wasn't even back in the country a week yet. Still, I had thought about her every single day since I left, and the thing that bothers me most is that I had to leave her, and I had to pray every day. In gods, I didn't believe in for her safety. For the hope that I wouldn't be able to tell her how I felt, I wanted so badly to do more, but I couldn't, but I did do one thing one specific thing.
I knew the time wasn't right. I knew it wasn't appropriate; people were grieving people were heartbroken. People had lost fathers' mother sisters' brothers. Classmates of mine were going to jail, and others were being laid to rest others were cursed too in ways that they would never ever recover, and all I could really think about was how does affect her what would she do and how she would deal with everything.
The plan on how to tell her seemed wrong and even childish, but it's the only way to her to at least listen to me before making a final judgment and rejecting me outright. Stead of unloading everything I want to say right now, I'm getting rejected because she's grieving everyone, she's already lost theirs am I and everyone else are on age. I must plan as insane as this sounds I stupid as this sounds, I have to plan every letter I write to her every gift seemed wrong. Revising it thinking about it realistically, she wasn't just anyone but someone who was down to earth. For months I was at war with myself, always thinking when the best time to talk to her to get to know her.
Maybe six months from now maybe a year, but I will tell her, and I will have some bliss of closure to close the book on my feelings. Regardless of everything I've gone through if she doesn't return, my feelings and never can? I can rest assured knowing that I at least close the book that I can at least say that I didn't die, never saying a word to her. And that I can watch from afar as she finds someone she can love fully and 100%. Well, I continue the family line someway somehow with whatever woman my mom decides to choose from me. That was my original destiny is a pureblood that will be it again, regardless of what my heart feels.
I love someone; at least I felt what it's like to be in love to desperately want what's best for someone willing to die for their own happiness. If meant they survived to see several tomorrows to live that long, happy life. Even if it's without you to sacrifice and wish the best and no matter what the outcome, you want to selfishly horde this person you love to yourself. Willing to allow them to be in love with other people if they do not love you. That you pray for their successes and hope for always their health and that they can smile every day like you wish you could smile at them.
I waited for a little under eight months after the battle of Hogwarts, And I send a simple message saying I'm glad you survived, and I'm even more pleased that you wore my bracelet. And from then on, I would send a message every day. My name signed my heart palpitations. I would talk about her beauty, her grace her intelligence. I asked about her day about what she was planning to do now and how she was feeling and if she needed anything. Something that I had offered in every letter and jokingly she said in one letter how about a newspaper company that wasn't a gossip rag? Since her face had been plastered on the front page of the prophet for the last month, I could almost hear the frustration behind the joke. And I made it a reality, a competitor. For the prophet. I took the notes she had mentioned about muggle what she said about sources verifying something before running it. It took a while to set up considering we want to make sure we could not only avoid sabotage from our only true future competitor but keep up a steady stream of news. One thing she made clear and something I realized she was quite the Slytherin herself. She mentioned that the news was easily how you win the hearts and minds of people. That's how the Oracle Delphi news came to be. Discrediting and putting the prophet on the ropes by its credit sources. UNBIAS reporting and getting a seal of approval from the man who won and the brightest witch of her age and having a daily comic strip, puzzle, and international part of the newspaper. She was shocked that I had something so large based on a frustrated comment. I let my own shield saying that for her, I would protect her and bring the world she wants badly to fruition.
I knew with how I felt I needed to see her, and that meant. I sent the letter telling her to meet me outside of Diagon Alley.
She stood there in her blue sweater dress stocking and short heels I dressed like a muggle on a date I had to ask my mother to get me muggle magazine with men's fashions, so I didn't look like an idiot and after that going to the trouble of finding those clothes. But the way she smiles at me? Made every effort more than worth it even if i felt so unlike myself without robes on. And I noticed the necklace I gave her still around her neck at that moment I prayed that my affections would be returned because he knew wouldn't be able to live without seeing that smile every day of his life. And that was something he was sure of with a doubt in his mind.
Final note: If you want me to be honest, the story has probably been sitting in the back burner for little close to 6 years. This was originally going to be a three-shot, but I just didn't have it in me. if you haven't already noticed, I belong to a specific set of the fandom, I am a part of the anyone but Ron for Hermione group. Draco Malfoy works, anyone works. But Ronald Weasley does not work. Cause if you look at it from every perspective from every vantage point, he does not deserve to be with Hermione Grainger I do not care, and it's the one thing I just do not understand honestly Regardless please give this story your attention for love recommend it share it with others this is a very tiny ship compared to a lot of the other ones. Hence, all the attention it gets if you really liked it is worthy of it. I mean it from the deepest part of my heart, and I thank you all for reading this story.