The Zoo.

Just a little something I put together after finally rewatching season 6 and bawling my eyes out for about two hours.

I refused for Sharon's fate to be canon. It makes no sense. It's not fair on Andy, on Rusty and on us for that matter.

In my very own canon she got a successful heart transplant and took a year off to recover- not even a failing heart could stand in between Sharon and her children.

I wrote this in an hour or so, once I stopped crying hence no beta, so mistakes are mine. English is my second language as well so you know, trying my best here ha.

Let me know if you like it, and if anyone would be interested in a second chapter.

I hope you enjoy

Long Live Sharon Raydor!

It was Sunday, early afternoon.

Sharon was working on notes related to her squad's latest case at her desk; as Rusty was working on Andrea's notes for an upcoming trial they had been assigned to. He worked from the couch, not an unusual scene in the condo. The mother and son had found that they could work really well while the same space; talking here and there to break the monotony of their paperwork.

Today however, Rusty had been fidgeting for the better part of the last hour and although Sharon felt like calling him out and pressuring him, the mother refrained herself. She settled for looking up every now and then and waited for him to spill the beans. It usually worked best with her youngest son.

"Hm, Mom?" Rusty finally said, avoiding eye contact.

"Yes honey?" Sharon answered, her voice soft and patient.

"You..You know how you always ask me to tell you if I want something for my birthday?".

"I do. I am usually met with en eye roll and irritated sigh, why?" His mother replied, only looking up from her work to give him a pointed look and a reassuring, understanding smile. She had become accustomed to Rusty's communication skills, or lack thereof. Acting detached yet open usually led to him opening up.

"I know I know, and I uh, I have been working on my attitude and I want you to know I am grateful for you, for everything that you've done for me, and for the fact that you haven't given up on me yet".

She closed her laptop and got up to join the young adult on the couch. Her heart surgery was behind them, but it had shaken the family to the chore and her children were left terrified of losing her. She grabbed his hand as she sat down next to him.

"I know honey. I love you and I am fine. I really am, and I am here." She said softly, brushing his fringe from his head and patting his cheek as Rusty held back tears. She gently turned his head towards her so he could look at her.

"You're my son, Rusty. I will never give up on you."

"I know, I know" He said after a moment, looking at his mother.

"What brought this on? Anything you want for your birthday? We're having dinner with your siblings, Gus, Andy and I and the squad the night after, but if that's not what you want…"

"No, no, it's perfect mom and I really appreciate it. It's just that I… Well, I know what I want."

"Oh? And what might that be young man?"

"I want you to take me to the zoo." He said in one breath, looking down at his hands.

She gasped and squeezed his hand tight. She tried to hide the surprise, but he knew her just as she knew him.

"Oh" was all the commander could manage to say.

"We don't have to and I know you're not always free on my birthday but.."

"Honey no. That's not what I meant. I'm surprised that's all. Of course I want to go to the zoo with you. If that's what you want".

"I think I'm ready. I mean, it has been a few years now and I am tired of not being able to drive passed the zoo without a panic attack."

"Oh honey."

"It's okay mom just… Will you? Take me there, I mean"

He sounded so fragile, unsure and younger than his 23 years. It broke her heart. Sharon had come to terms with Sharon Beck's addiction, she was even glad the woman had finally cleaned up and lived a somewhat healthy life with her second child. But she would never, ever forgive her for the pain and abuse she put Rusty through for the first 15 years of his life.

"Of course Rusty. Anything you want love." She finally answered, composing her thoughts and trying to push away any residual anger she had towards "The other Sharon in her son's life".

"Can it..Could it just be you and me? I mean, I don't want to hurt Andy's feelings or Gus's but, I think, I think it'd be easier for me if, if it was just us".

"They will both understand, of that I am sure. I will take the day off and let Lt. Provenza and Andy know that I am not to be called under any circumstances, how's that?"

Ever since her heart transplant and following year on medical leave, Sharon and the squad were as tight as ever. She mainly handled the bureaucracy of their cases, and would participate in brainstorming in the murder room. She however, never interviewed suspects anymore nor did she go in the field. Andy had made sure of that and made her promise. It had been hard to step back but she trusted her squad, her family, with everything she had and it had been time. Life had given her a second chance and Sharon was well aware that the opportunity she had been given to spend time with her husband and to see her children through a bit more of adulthood was not to be taken for granted, ever.

"I know it's silly and probably too much trouble but.." Rusty said, bringing Sharon back to reality.

"Enough young man. A woman can take her son to the zoo for his birthday without the world ending. Honey I have been grateful to have you in my life from the first day you -reluctantly I might add- waltzed into my life. I am honoured of the trust you put in me Rusty in asking me this.

"You're my best friend, mom. And my mother. There is no one in this world I trust more than you. I love you."

As much as Rusty was reticent to human contact and demonstration of affection as a general rule, he had been letting his mom near him more and more as time went by during emotional turmoils. Sharon's illness and near death experience had brought them closer together and the man always made sure to tell and show her often, how loved she was.

He hugged her tight and pretended he didn't see her cry. She had cried too much over him already.

"So it's settled then? Next Thursday it's you and me, at the zoo."

"So it is. Thanks mom, really".

"We have a deal"

"What else is you around here"

She smirked at him and grabbed her phone, requesting her day off right away and booking tickets for the zoo.

Here it is, just let me know if you'd like a second chapter, of the actual visit to the zoo :)