Note: This story is meant to be a parody of sorts. While tehre will be story, it's meant to be silly and stupid, and not in any JoJo universe. Without any more delay, enjoy and feel free to criticize.

"Welcome Back folks, to middle-league christo town hockey!" The announcer let out, making the crowd cheer. There were two groups of hockey players. One red, and one blue. They both ran at each other, and the blue team hit the puck towards the red goal. "Oh no! What will Christo do!?" The Goalie crossed their arms, as the ball edged closer. Then seemingly faster than humanly possible, knocks it away into the other side's goaley! "Amazing folks! Christo Town Middle-School students Biggie Frost has nocked the goalie all-the-way to the other side of the field!"

Biggy frost, the goalie in red, looked into the crowd. He moved his finger's nervously as the bell for the game ended. A person in the stands, a female, had gotten up and walked away. The hockey player had a sweatdrop fall as they walked away.

Three days later…

"Hey Mike n' ike!" Someone yelled. I opened my eyes slightly, lifting up my hood slightly. My name is Michael Yuukaza. I'm a 16 year old student here in Christo Town, in america. Indiana to be precise. I looked over, and saw two bulky bullies approach me. I lowered my hood again, letting out a sigh. "Don't ignore me pipsqueak!"

"What the hell do you want?" I asked. The bully gave me a ticked off look.

"Don't speak to me like that either! Some asshole is looking for you in the office, says he has some legal business!" He yelled. I sat up from the tree branch I was in, before jumping down. I wore a black hoodie that was slightly too big for me with the words 'champ' on the hoodie. I had pants that were a bit baggy, with a lanyard that has a pink dinosaur on it. I wasn't that muscular at all, I was actually pretty skinny. I pushed up my black lensed glasses and headed towards the gym.

"Thanks losers." I told them. They gave angry glares, but backed away. I smirked with the fear that I had indulged into them. I walked forward into the office, where I saw a man I didn't recognize. He was super ripped, like his shoulders looked way too big. His eyes and face were sharp, with green pupils. He wore a black robe, underneath there looked to be some kind of black trench coat. How many things did he need to cover his body up? "Who are you?"

"You wouldn't know who I am. My name is Jaak Jabar, or JoJo for short. I'm going to need you to follow me away from peering eyes." he told me. This seems like one of three things. General Ackbar's expertise, a pedofile, or a gang member. Then again it could be all three. "Are you coming?"

"Sure. But if you try anything funny imma give you a can of whoop ass." I told him. He scoffed at me as he opened the door, and I followed suit. We went outside, and the back of the school. He then turned around. "Aight fam, you better tell me what's up or imma head out."

"As I said my name is Jaak Jabar, or JoJo if you must, and I work for the fastwagon foundation." He told me.

"That name sounds weird. Feels like it's supposed to be something else." I noted. He continued with a nod.

"You see, we look for very special people in this world. People who you could say are strange, quite bizarre some might say." He told me. Insert credit title here why don't you? "I've seen you in action before, only once but," JoJo pointed a finger at me, "You're a stand user aren't you!?"

"A nani?" I asked. "I have no idea what in za warudo you're talking about. Can I get now Mr. Pedobear? I don't wanna be penetrated."

I smirked as he gave me an angry face.

"Amazing Falcon!" He yelled as he threw off his cloak.

"What is the name of your pet or-'' I started, but before I finished a muscular humanoid brown bird, with a mohawk, appeared! It had a blue top with the words 'AMAZING' with red shorts on the bottom, "Sweet kami mother of neptune what is that!?"

"So you can see it." JoJo inquired, "this is my stand, Amazing Falcon! Stands are a manifestation of our fighting spirit that only a stand user can see! Which means you must also have one."

"U-uhh...umm...well shit. How do i do this...ummm…" I asked myself. I could feel myself shaking. Then a thought appeared. I remembered how I kicked everyone else's ass. I had a friend which cut them up. "Could she be...no...can she?"

"If you don't hurry up, I will just 'toiyaa' you into oblivion!" He warned me. I straightened out.

"R-right! Iron Maiden!" I called out, swiping my hand to the side. I got covered in a silver aura as a person appeared next to me. She had a feminine body, with a white dress and silver hair down to her neck. Her eyes were a golden color, and as she elegantly landed on the ground with one foot, she slammed her foot onto the ground and let out two scythes from underneath her dress.

The scythes went up towards JoJo's neck, but his Stand grabbed it. I noticed that his hands started bleeding when I did.

"I got cut just by grabbing them…!" JoJo mumbled. "This is a pretty dangerous stand."

"Last chance man, I really dont wanna have to hurt you." I told him. He 'hmphed', before his stand moved away Iron Maiden's scythe and ran forward quickly, punching her in the face barely fast enough for me to see as it yelled 'toiya'. As she got hit, I could feel the impact and was hit in the face as well. I was sent off my face, and Iron Maiden jumped back, kneeling down. I wiped the blood coming out of my lip. "S-shit...look I really have to-"

Before I could finish, the lunch bell rang. I tensed up, as I got a sudden mix of emotions.

"Sire," Iron Maiden started. JoJo took a step back, with a shocked expression, "it would appear that you missed lunch with your child."

"S-she...it…" JoJo mumbled. Amazing Falcon stood there with its arms crossed. "It can talk!?"

"Y-yeah…" I said. I stood up. "She can. But you shouldn't worry about that, you bastard…"

JoJo raised an eyebrow as I got up and spit blood onto the ground. "I promised my baby girl that I'd eat with her and do math. But since I couldn't make it in time, they won't let me into their class. I'm gonna kick your ass!"

"Tch...kinda ridiculous don't you think?" JoJo asked.

"Shut your mouth!" I yelled. Iron Maiden ran forward swinging her scythe's away rapidly. She could attack with her scythes at, and this is a rough calculation, fifty miles-per-hour. Amazing Falcon started dodging, getting slight cuts which also appeared on JoJo. Amazing Falcon zoomed past Iron Maiden's blades, and with swift speeds, started attacking.

"Toiya, Toiya, Toiya,Toiya,Toiya,Toiya,Toiya,Toiya,Toiya,Toiya,Toiyaaaa!" I was sent flying as Iron Maiden was dissipated, and I was sent into a car which was pushed back and slammed into two others. I coughed up some blood. JoJo walked up, Amazing Falcon hovering over me. It put it's head over me, and with a green light my wounds were healed. Well I still had bruises and cuts, but I could feel my ribs and chest putting itself back together.

"W-what…?" I asked.

"I healed your internal wounds." JoJo told me. "Amazing Falcon can heal any internal injury. Unfortunately he can heal cuts or bruises, so you'll need to patch yourself up."

I opened my eyes wide, as Iron Maiden appeared without my command and put her extremely close to his neck. My eyes widened even more.

"I-Iron Maiden no! Please stand down!" I told her. She nodded as she dissipated. "So why did you confront me if you're not gonna kill me?"

"It's simple." He told me. "I need your help. Help only a stand user can provide. I can fill you in on the details, but not here."

I sighed, rubbing my eyes. I looked at my now cracked phone, and it was just hitting 6th hour.

"First of all, I need to grab my little girl after school." I told him. "I'm expecting you to help with that. Second of all, I expect this phone to be replaced."

"That's fine with me." JoJo told me smirking. And this was the start of my bizarre adventure…

…

…

Roll the cred-

To be continued

STAND NAME: Iron Maiden (MK1)

USER: Michael Yuukaza (student)

Destructive Power: B (able to break material's as strong as steel with it's scythes)

Speed: B (can swing at 50 MPH-maximum recorded human punching speed is 32)

Range: C (10 meters, attack's reach an additional 2)

Persistence: ?

Precision: C

Stand Potential: A

Ability: It is unknown what Iron Maiden's ability truly is. She does show more independence than most stands, on the rare occasion giving a battle suggestion, informing her user of something he can't see, or preventing him from being hurt. It's possible that her ability is too just to provide company to her user.