So I've had this fic idea in mind for a while, where the crew thinks Two is dead and Five is thinking about everything that Two meant to her, the things she learned from her and how she's already experienced so much loss at her age. In my mind, Five looks up to Two as a sort of parent figure so naturally her death would hit hard. This is sort of a more in-depth analysis of what could be going on in Five's mind in this situation.
On a different note, reminder to stay safe during this whole COVID-19 chaos, it's important to remain informed and prepared but also keep in mind that panic is often counterproductive. At any rate, I hope you guys enjoy!
"You taught me the courage of stars before you left... And I couldn't help but ask you to say it all again. I tried to write it down but I could never find a pen. I'd give anything to hear you say it one more time; that the universe was made just to be seen by my eyes"
The grief had come and gone. Then resourfaced with full force, every so often. Three had attempted to make her feel better, as had Six. She appreciated the gesture, really. But nothing would bring Two back and no amount of words could ease her emotions.
They'd settled down on a nearby planet, the Raza remaining in close orbit while the Marauder stood on a clear part of the forested area.
It was a fact-finding mission, really. They'd spoken with Commander Truffault who sent them on a stakeout to some back-water planet to find out if the rumours surrounding Ferrous Corp's latest white hole technology prototype were true. Mikkei had already taken the fall for the previous one, and they wouldn't make the same mistake again but being informed never hurt anyone. There was a relatively small lab a few miles out from their camping site. Not much security, the facility clearly relying on its remote location.
It wasn't their normal kind of work, but the planet had been close by, and truth be told they all needed a break from their usual line of work. This seemed like a good place to start, at least according to Six anyway.
And so the remaining members of the crew of the Raza had packed up a few things, boarded their shuttle, and waited for any sign of suspicious activity. Three and Six had been taking turns coming closer to the facility,circling around. Five had managed to tap into their computer systems to give the Android access to some security features back on the Raza, but they couldn't risk storming in. Not yet anyway.
The space they'd chosen to land the Marauder on was vast, the tall pine trees swaying gently with the breeze. The night was clear and the air was fresh. On any other occasion, Five would have deeply enjoyed being here, perhaps even pull out her sketchbook and try to capture the night sky with charcoal and pencil on a blank page until her fingers were stained dark. But not tonight. Not any night to come.
She looked up into the night sky with tears welling in her eyes once again, the memory of Two still fresh in her mind. There was moments in which Five would space out and completely forget that the commander of the Raza, the ship she had come to know as home, was gone. It had only been a short while since her death, and she'd often find herself staring at the metal door of Two's quarters, expecting her to step out at any moment, or calling out to her over the comms without thinking, only to realize she wouldn't be getting a response.
She'd long ago thought she had cried herself out completely, that she couldn't possibly display her grief in the form of tears any longer.
She had been mistaken.
Five's mind continued to spiral down a rabbit hole of thoughts and emotions. Why the hell did she have to feel so damn much?
Somberly, she though back to the old woman's words, according to the Android. Her words.
"Where are the rest of the crew?"
"Gone. A long time ago."
Was this it? Had that day of the explosion truly been the final time she'd ever see Two? And what about the rest of them? Clearly, she'd be the last to remain at the end. Which meant she'd be forced to stand and watch as her friends, her family died off, one by one. The thought itself brought on more tears to her eyes as grief overcame her once more.
She mourned for the losses she had experienced; One, Nyx, and even Four. Because the Four she'd known was long gone, replaced by a ruthless Emperor, only a shell of the man he'd used to be. And now Two.
And she mourned for the losses that were to come. Three, Six. How would they go? Would it be just another day, completing another mission where they would expect everything to go according to plan, and then never return? Would the situation in which they'd die be as sudden and unexpected as One's? Or as risky as Two's had been? Five didn't want to know.
She wished more than anything that she could have seen into the future somehow, prevented Two's death. And One's, and Nyx's, and everyone she cared about.
Three had stepped out of the make-shift tent they'd been camping at aside from the Marauder. She could feel his eyes on her even from the distance.
"Hey kid! Come and eat something. Wouldn't want you out here starving to death before we complete the mission, now would we? Who would hack the systems then?"
He called out, trying a light approach in hopes of easing some of the girl's visible tension.
Five was grateful for Three and Six, for their guidance and their friendship. But their words didn't offer any closure or bring her any peace. She wanted to cry and scream and punch something and sleep forever all at the same time. Yet all she could manage to get out was a small shake of her head.
I don't want to eat. Two won't be sitting at the table going over inventory on a screen, or rolling her eyes at your comments. She's gone. She's gone and she's never coming back and I don't want to eat.
Five had been too wrapped up in the thoughts she wouldn't voice, couldn't voice to notice Three had nearly finished crossing the distance between them. The sharp snap of a twig breaking beneath Three's boot brought Five back to reality and she forced herself to turn around and face him.
"You remember what the Android said? That all of this would be good for the galaxy at the end of the day?"
He asked softly.
She did.
The Android had explained in detail exactly what older Five had said to her during her time stuck in a temporal anomaly. The words were practically seared into Five's brain.
As was the helplessness she felt at not being able to prevent the worst from happening; the death of those who mattered most to her. The inability to change their condemned fate.
"What does it all mean?"
Not a happy ending for everyone, but a positive result for the rest of the galaxy."
"Screw the galaxy! I want Two back!"
She cried out, tears streaming down her cheeks as sobs wrecked her chest and she began to hyperventilate. Three watched dumbfounded for a split second; he wasn't used to seeing Five like this. But then again, it had been a while since they had to deal with the loss of Two. When they'd first lost her, Five had broken down immediately; crying out as she watched Two get shot out the airlock and into the darkness of space. That was a lifetime ago, and Two hadn't really been dead after all. Yet that had been Five's reaction and they'd only known each other for a couple of weeks then.
Now, months later, after everything they'd been through, the relationship they'd built was much stronger. Three knew how much Two mattered to her, he knew the kid was heartbroken. And he understood. He missed her just as much as the kid did.
Five stumbled backwards for a moment, lost in her panic and heartbreak. Three stepped carefully towards her, holding his arms out as if to steady her. The girl lost her footing and slumped down towards the grass beneath her. Three somehow managed to catch Five in his arms before she hit the ground.
Unsure of what else to do, and wanting nothing more than to take Five's pain away, he held her shaking frame while she sobbed. She melted into the embrace, laying her head against his chest as he placed his chin atop her head, pulling her shivering frame closer to him in an attempt to soothe her.
"I want my friend back"
It had seemed like an eternity had gone by before Five spoke, her soft voice sounded so far away, barely above a whisper. Laced with all the sorrow and pain she felt in her soul.
"I know kid, I know"
Five moved her head to rest on Three's shoulder, the sobs that had consumed her had now turned to soft sniffles.
The teal-haired girl stared at a teardrop, falling from her face and splashing into the ground, mesmerized by it.
Taking advantage of Five's temporarily calm state, Three moved to stand with Five still in his arms. He slowly walked them back to the tent; their make-shift home, hoping the kid would get some rest while he joined Six on the Marauder for a drink, and perhaps tomorrow with some luck they could coax her into eating something.
He thought of Two, knowing full well that she wouldn't want to see Five like this. She'd want him to look after her to the best of his ability, and that included basic needs. He once again wished Two was there; he missed the boss lady far more than he let on. But the kid needed him now. This was not the time to allow his own thoughts to consume him. With Two gone, Five was down one more person she cared about. Three knew that Two had loved Five, and that her love had meant the world to the teen girl. The poor kid had already lost so much, and he made a promise to himself that he wouldn't let her down.
Five felt herself being carried across the grassy field on steady steps. Her mind began to wander once more and she thought of the parallel world they had entered when they didn't calibrate the Blink Drive properly the first time they used it; the different outcomes, an infinite universe of endless possibilities.
She thought of the way a seemingly trivial action or decision could alter significant events down the line, the butterfly effect and of how perhaps in another life, one small change resulted in Two avoiding her death. Where she was alive and commanding the Raza, or working on missions and running from the GA, or perhaps not at all. The theoretical situations were endless; every single one of them better than her being dead.
Five felt herself being lowered onto a soft surface. She turned on her side slowly as a blanket was placed atop her shoulders. The gesture was caring and gentle, and it reminded her of Two's protective nature on nights when Five was plagued by nightmares. Growing up on a mercenary spaceship wasn't easy, but Two had made it better, helped her through difficult times despite her own distant nature. She had been a mentor, a protector, an amazing friend and a capable leader. And now she was gone.
Three placed a soft kiss to Five's forehead and the girl turned her head up to face him.
"Will you stay with me, please?"
He looked into the girl's wide blue eyes for a moment, their stares communicating more than words ever could before he gave a short nod.
"Yeah, sure kid. Whatever you need, I'm right here."
He sat cross-legged in front of Five, smiling gently as he watched her mouth a silent "Thank you" before resting her head down.
With the exhaustion of her breakdown weighing her eyelids down, Five drifted off to sleep, hoping to find some closure within herself in the days to come. She knew that although Two may be gone, her words, her lessons and the impact she had left on Five would remain with her for the rest of her life, of that she was certain.
Thank you for reading this! I feel like even if you don't see the Two/Five mother/daughter relationship, it's clear they do care about each other, like every time Two snaps at someone hurting Five, or when Wexler spaced Two and One tells Five "I know she meant a lot to you", so that's kind of what I was going for with this. Additionally, I've read enough great fics with Three acting as a sort of father figure to Five so now I'm kind of on board with that idea and tried to portray that on here as well.
The song lyrics from the beginning are from "Saturn" by Sleeping At Last and I was listening to "In My Mind" by Skeler, "To Be Alone With You" by Fleurie, and Ilomilo by Billie Eilish.