01

It felt like I had only rested a split second. Yet, when I tried to wake up, my vision was blurry beyond the point of recognizing anything. All I knew was that it was bright, so bright I could only keep my eyes open for a moment before I was forced to cover them with my arm. I tried to get up, but I couldn't even feel my legs. It was like I was a bug, pinned under a magnifying glass, a huge light being shone in my face.

"Shhh! One of them's waking up!"

I tried again. It wasn't as bright, but I still couldn't make out what I was even looking at. There was tan, black, blue, but I had no idea what I was seeing. Eventually, my vision focused. The sand-colored shapes I had vaguely made out were people! Well, kind of. I mean, they had faces, but they weren't human. They looked more like clay blobs than actual heads. And their eyes were pure black. I blinked. The shapes were still there.

"Papa, what are they?"

"Outta mah way, what's all tha ruckus 'bout?"

I tried to move to my feet again. It was too painful.

"Hey." One of the children moved closer to me. "Are you okay, mister?"

My voice was so hoarse, I couldn't get a single word out. Everyone was looking at me now, and I was hopelessly stuck to the ground. They were getting closer and closer. What did they want from me? How did I get here? I didn't know anything. I couldn't even think of my name.

"Hey! Give him space!" Another girl jumped in front of the crowd, blocking their advance with her hands. She backed them up, then walked over to me. "Are you okay?"

"I-uh" I stammered. "I don't-k-now. Kind of?"

I was decidedly not okay.

"So where am I?" I felt my mouth. It felt like I hadn't had anything liquid in a few millennia. "And more importantly, does this place have any water?"

"Here, I'll get you something to drink." The girl ran off.

The girl came back shortly afterward with a bottle. "Here," she handed it to me.

I let the cool liquid run down my throat. It was bitter, and it tasted almost alien compared to the water I was used to. I tried again to speak. "Thanks.." I sat up. My voice was weak, but I could still talk. "Now where am I?"

"Are you sure you're alright?" The girl asked again, ignoring my question. "You look like you fell out of the sky."

"He did fall out of the sky, sis." A boy was standing next to the girl. The two were exactly the same height, except this one had orange skin, and hair that draped over both eyes, also orange, with teal edging. It hadn't even registered before, but the girl wasn't like the other things. She looked more human, but only slightly. Her eyes were huge, her arms were like noodles, with giant, meaty hands on the end. She didn't even have legs, her feet just connected directly to her torso.

"Outta my way, brats!" A giant blue figure pushed the two kids aside. "Whatchu all lookin' at?"

It took me a second to realize, but I knew the creature from somewhere. But from what? I didn't even have time to process the boatload of confusion I had been given when a mallet went flying through the air. Some animal instinct kicked in, and somehow, I managed to scramble out of the way before my internal organs were crushed. The hammer harmlessly bounced off the cobblestone ground, where my stomach had been less than a second earlier. The penguin-esque figure shouted at nobody in particular.

"Looks like an alien invadah!"

Another voice jeered from the crowd. "Mash it with your mallet!"

The girl stopped the thing before it could bring down the hammer on me again. "Wait a second!" She sounded like she was on the verge of tears. "We don't even know where it comes from!"

My legs could finally hoist me to my feet. It took a while, and it hurt like hell, but I could.

"Even if I was from space…" I hesitated. "I don't know. I might be. But still! What the hell's your problem! You see someone fall out of the sky, and you think 'Hmm, there's no way he's in enough pain'?"

A snail-like creature jumped (slithered?) out of the crowd, brandishing a golden spear at my throat. "How dare you berate his majesty like that?"

"Right! How dare I not want to die! How dare I not want my rib cage collapsed in on me! How dare I be confused after being taken from my home and thrust into a goddamn Salvidor Dali painting!"

I considered screaming, but before I could raise hell, there was a flash from overhead. It looked like a comet, it was burning up as it paved way across the sky. I could hear the crackle of electronics getting fried, even though the object was at least 1000 feet away. In the wake of the star, a trail of vapor hung idly. The thing spun uncontrollably, crashing into the ground and dashing forward like a saw blade that was balanced on its teeth. It crushed through the fence of a sheep paddock, sending about three or four of the livestock inside tumbling along with it. I could see it more accurately now; it appeared to be a large gold-plated metal star, close to the size of a monster truck tire. As the spinning slowed, it dug into the ground, scoring the earth deeper and deeper as the momentum forced it uphill. It finally came to a stop at the tip of a cliff; a meter or so more and the thing would have jumped the ledge.

There was a huge collective gasp from the group. Next thing I knew, the crowds were charging up to the crash site, eager to see the wreckage. The penguin that had tried to kill me shot me a look; whether it was smug or angry I couldn't tell. He got into an old-fashioned jeep that seemed to apparate beside him, with the snail at the steering wheel. The two sped off laughing. And just like that, I was old hat.

Eager not to be trampled, I ran towards the site, when suddenly my ankle turned on something firm, and my face planted into the dirt hard. I cursed my usual clumsiness as I sat lying face down. After a bit of feeling miserable, I got myself up and turned around to see what tripped me. There, lying on the ground in front of me, was Lexi. She didn't look real either, but there was no mistaking her thick hair and bangs, or the birthmark she normally kept covered because it makes her "Look weird." She resembled an anime character, but at least her proportions were normal. I lifted her up and shook her, but she refused to rouse. Finally, impatiently, I slapped her across the face.

The lanky girl in my arms awoke with a start. She felt the spot where my hand hat hit her. "Ow…" she rubbed the mark, which was starting to turn a shade red. Maybe I had gone a little overboard. "Don't you know not to hit a lady?"

Lexi's eyes locked onto my face and froze in horror. "What the hell's going on?" She pushed me away from her, not realizing that her leg strength had left her. Her feet stood her up for only about a second before she collapsed backward.

"Hey, it's okay. It's me, Ethan." I held out my hand to help her up, and she reluctantly grabbed it. "Just take some deep breaths."

Lexi looked at me incredulously. "What's going on? Why do you loo-"

"I have no idea." I cut her off. "But come with me, pay attention now, ask questions later." I beckoned her to follow the mass of cookie dough. "There'll be plenty of time to scream later, but for now, we need to figure out where, how, what, and why we are."

We sprinted through the crowd, up the hill to the cliffside where the incident had occurred. "So, Catch me up." Lexi slowed her pace once we were caught up to everyone else. I slowed to match her, stopping to catch my breath.

"I woke up, saw those things looking at me weird, someone tried to kill me..." I rubbed my temples. Everything had happened so fast, I had barely registered anything. "and something crashed over there," I pointed to the cliff. "That's about all I know."

The crowd had beat us up the grassy bluff; by the time the two of us made it to the top, there was no room to even see the crash. All of the things were roughly uniform in height, differing by at most 6 centimeters, the tallest still slightly shorter than me. The limited view I had was useless, blocked out by the sheer number of creme heads. I heard a whirr of compressed air let out from a few meters ahead, the sound leaving a lurching pain in my stomach. As if by second nature, my hands started pushing people aside, clambering me quickly through the crowd without even deciding to do it. I emerged at the other end, now with a clear view of the wreck. It was gold, pure and unalloyed. The malleable metal had warped with the impact, now bending upwards and coming to jagged points doubtlessly formed from the force of rolling across the ground.

We all waited in anticipation as two spherical hatches whirred quietly and slowly started to retract, releasing a good bit of vapor and smoke from the inside compartment. Something was struggling inside, it's plump, pink body seemed to fit perfectly within its container. A burst of pressure and the thing fell upside down into the soft dirt below.

The penguin thing, who had beaten the crowd up the hill with the jeep, curiously meandered up to the stunned mass, picking it up by the foot with a gloved, fingerless hand, twirling it like you might spin a christmas ornament suspended on a string to get a better view of the backside.

"Do you know who those two are?" Lexi had pulled me in and whispered into my ear. I nodded gravely, knowing exactly who they were. The thought of it scared me far more than it intrigued. I had to be asleep. There was no way I wasn't. Soon enough, I would wake up in my own sheets and the nightmare would be over. At least I hoped, because if my vision was correct, if I wasn't asleep in my house after another hot day, then that means I'm not on earth. I'm not even in reality. I bit my lip.

I'm sure you know who they are, so I won't bother dumbing it down for you.

There was a kind of clamoring sound, and I saw Kirby fly in a parabolic arc straight over the cliff. Lexi and I stared at the thing as he bounced over the grassland below and disappeared out of sight into a canyon. Lexi looked like she wanted to say something, but no words came out of her mouth. I couldn't blame her, any more than i could blame myself. I wanted to say something, to scream and throw myself on the ground, to curl up into a ball and cry until everything made sense. But I couldn't. I was just going through the motions, and the fact that I had about as much control over my body as a leaf in a hurricane scared me to death.

"One down, two tah go."

A sickeningly yellow gloved hand reached out and gripped Lexi by the collar of her shirt. She tried to squirm out, but Dedede's grip on her was too tight. I tried to lay a punch on the overweight bird, but before the blow connected, his lackey had forced me out of arms' reach of him with the razor-sharp edge of the small golden spear. The two of them laughed like idiots, and seeing the opportunity the snail pushed me back with surprising force. I stumbled over a small rock and landed hard on my back in the pastel grass. There was jeering coming from all over.

"That's quite enough!" A deep male voice boomed from the crowd. The authority held in their words made both of them stop in their tracks. The diversion was just what Lexi needed, and never into "fighting fair", Lexi drove her elbow hard into the assailant's nether region. Dedede shrieked in surprise and pain, his voice jumping up four octaves. In the shock of the attack, his grip relaxed a bit, and Lexi slipped out of his hands with a twist of her chest. Impressed by her act of either heroism or survival instinct, I decided to try my own hand. With a semi-graceful flick, I pushed the spear now levelled at my throat down into the ground, and grabbed the top of the handle,pulling it in to me to try and knock the snail over. The henchman was a bit faster than his unwieldy boss, and he pulled with all his strength to balance out my attempts. Unfortunately, his wits couldn't keep up with his agility, and he forgot a crucial detail. I suddenly released my grip on the spear entirely, and the snail went careening back into Dedede, knocking both of them into a heap.

"I said, That is enough!"

I saw who was calling out to us. He had emerged to the front of all the other things like it, and was standing with his fingerless arms on his hips like a mother scolding her bratty children. The humanoid looked like all the other things in the crowd, except he had on a policeman's uniform and a jet-black, spiky mustache that seemed to be made out of plastic rather than hair. The figure moved closer, his expression changing from scornful to angry. He stepped in between us and our attackers. "I will not have brawls erupting in my jurisdiction!"

Dedede's face contorted into a smug grin. He glanced both of us over with a classic "You guys are in so much trouble" look, got up, and cleared his throat. "Maybe a month in the dungeon will teach them a thing o' two."

"But-" I objected, hysteria mounting in my voice. But before I could answer, the officer spoke again.

"You have shown our guests quite enough hospitality, your highness! If you will not grant our visitors some respect, I see no other choice than to put them in protective custody!"

As I got to my feet and dusted myself off, the snail jumped in the face of the officer.

"Now you listen to me, buster! Don't you forget that he gave you the job of police chief and he can take it away faster than you can say 'penitentiary'!"

"Well there is a third option," Lexi retorted sarcastically, bringing her arm back to threaten Dedede, "I could elbow His Royal Highness in the crotch again."

The snail looked ready to explode, but his boss just let out an almost good-natured guffaw. "Come on, escargoon." He jumped into the car waiting beside him. "I think we owe our pink pal a little visit."

The two wasted no time speeding off, leaving me with the sea of identical tan faces.

"Wow, I've never seen anyone stand up to Dedede before."

The voice came from behind me. I turned 180 degrees to see a small boy and girl, standing side by side. Above them, two balls were hovering. They looked like smaller versions of Kirby, except one was a deep cyan, while the other was a hot magenta. The girl I recognized as the one who brought me water.

"You don't think they're star warriors, do ya?" The boy turned to the girl. "Look at him! What's he gonna do against a huge monster?"

"I'm so flattered." I rolled my eyes.

The girl ignored my remark. "Maybe not, but heroes don't have to be big and strong to be warriors!" She looked me and Lexi over like a rancher examining a horse. "If Kabu said it, it's gotta be true!"

"Maybe you should ask them." The magenta ball added.

The girl backed away just a bit from us. "I'm Tiff. And this is my brother, Tuff." She pointed to the boy.

"And We're Fololo" Fololo said,

"And Falala!" Falala finished.

"We're looking for Kirby," Tiff said, unsure of how to phrase herself. "Do you know where we can find him?"

"Last I recall, he was thrown off a cliffside." Lexi pretended to be deep in thought. "Might want to look in that canyon to the east."

"Then that means… Oh no!" Tiff squealed. "Come on, Tuff! We have to find him!"

The four of them ran off towards the canyon. I tried to pursue them. "Don't leave me behind!" I called, but I was stopped by the crowd. Their short figures moved easily through the masses, disappearing out of sight.

Now there were people all around me. I tried to drop out from the center, but everywhere I looked there seemed to be a wall of the things just as thick as every other side. The world was spinning, I could feel my claustrophobia kicking in, panic was starting to get to my head. I started to lose balance when a hand caught me.

"Get back, you savages!" Lexi was shooing people away. "Come on, 5 feet! He's afraid of tight spaces!"

I started to regain my balance. The things were a bit too close for comfort, but I didn't really care all that much. Compared to everything else I wanted, it seemed like a petty complaint.

"Goodness, has everyone in this town lost their manners?" One of the things had emerged from the front, wearing a bow-tie and a brown vest, with an equally brown tophat that was about a size too small to fit on my fist rested on top of his completely bald head. "These two… interesting fellows are our honored guests, and we should show them a warmer welcome to Cappytown! In fact, as the mayor, I say that we shall have a grand soiree in their honor!"

"Listen, I'm flattered, bu-"

"We are honored to accept your invitation, mayor!" Lexi cut me off, trying her best to sound formal, "I am Alexis, and this is my second-in-command, Ethan."

"Woah hold o-" I winced as I felt her jab me in the stomach pretty hard.

"We were traveling between galaxies in the heavens, when something went wrong in our starship. When the thing was destroyed, we were knocked out by the blast. Everything until we landed here we were unconscious for."

"And the little pink ball, I assume is your pet?" The mayor asked me.

"Who, Kirby?" I responded, confused.

"That was Kirby?"

"The Star Warrior?"

"He's so… pink!"

"We gotta find him!"

A thin linen cloth draped over the long-worn table. The wood on the bottom was starting to rot, and there were stains of port wine and sherry, ages of elegant feasting long since past. But the finished maple had a sort of quaint charm to it, the kind of familiarity and comfort it gave off helped a tiny bit to put my mind at ease. But nothing was gonna stop the whirlwind of thoughts in my head. Everything had sort of zipped by, since I had awoken that morning. I tried to put the thoughts out of my mind until I was ready to understand the situation at hand, but the questions kept creeping back into my consciousness. If I was stuck here, and it seemed to be that I was, then there was nothing I could do about it. So, I would worry about the "why" and the "how" after I had settled into my new surroundings. Right now, I was setting up the table for tonight's feast. The mayor had decreed that the town's most influential leaders and workers would meet the three unexpected visitors with a grand soiree. I offered to help cook something for the dinner, not really because I was in a particularly helping mood, but because I wanted something to take my mind off of the current situation. When I still was on earth, whenever I felt stressed, angry, or sad, I busted out my grandmother's cooking book and made one of her homestyle recipes. I loved my parents well enough, but between their corporate jobs that sent them globetrotting almost daily, they didn't actually have much time to spend with me. That's where my grandma came in. Almost everything I remember from my childhood happened with her. She taught me how to ride a bike. To play guitar. She was the one there, clapping wildly for me as I played hot cross buns horribly out of tune at the 3rd grade talent show. She was even the one that introduced me to Lexi. I owe everything that made my childhood great to her. But the most important thing she taught me was made in the oven. My grandma loved to cook, she made all her food from scratch. Even when it was midnight after a hard day, she would still find the time to make a two-course meal from whatever she happened to have on hand. I loved her food. I loved eating it, but more importantly, I loved to cook it. Whenever I poured some oil on a pan, or started slicing vegetables, I got in the zone almost immediately. After that, I could prep, chop, sear, and bake for hours at a time, every single thing besides the stove and the knife in hand melting away. It set me free, free from my anger at my parents for never having the time to listen to me, from the disappointment of not getting that little league soccer trophy, or my guitar breaking after one too many clumsy drops. Cooking was more than a hobby for me, it was a passion. No, a lifestyle. I cooked with my grandma all the time, week after week, dish after dish, each one I loved making more than the last. Until one day, a truck t-boned her little fiat. Up until then, she had been my only real parent. After that, the only one looking after me was Lexi. I don't know if she felt like a babysitter to me, I didn't have the courage to ask, but then, in my freshman year, it snapped. Maybe it was the fact that both of us were only children, or that we both felt like our parents didn't care about us. But I realized, I thought of her as more than a friend, even a best friend. She was the only family I had.

"Hey! Houston to Ethan!" Lexi shook me lightly, setting a napkin and silverware at the plate to the left of me. "Anybody there?"

"I'm here, relax." I was still clutching the ivory plate in my hand. I carefully laid it down. "What's up?"

"What's up? What's up? You know, aside from the fact that I'm stuck in this hellhole, Not much, really! Everything normal for you?!"

"Jeez, sorry I asked." I placed another plate and glass on the next place. "You don't get a monopoly on self-pity, you know, I'm stuck here just the same as you!"

"You're the whole reason we're here in the first place! I told you not to play with fate, and what did you do? You made fun of me! I think you called me a, what was it again? 'Paranoid rube?'"

"Okay, fine! you were right, I was wrong. But it's not like I made a stupid mistake, either! Life is scientific! Things always happen because a law makes it so!" I stopped my tangent. "But- but still, we're here anyways, and if fate really does exist, we didn't really have any choice to be here, did we? I don't get it. Why can't this all just be a dream?" I started crying. I knew it was pointless, that I was just being a big baby. But I couldn't help it, the tears just kept rolling. "Just 24 hours ago, everything was perfect! I got accepted into the college of my dreams, I had friends, not just one or two, but lots of them! I was popular! I had a stable job, a car, now what! I could be stuck here for who knows how long? I don't have anything here! I'm a nobody, I'm just a side character in some crappy show!" I folded my face in my arms on the table, and sobbed hysterically. "I just don't understand..."

I felt a warm embrace from behind me, making me just notice how cold I was. It felt good to be there, in the heat of another person. Finally, I stopped crying. Lexi let go just a bit. "It's okay, it's gonna be okay." I wiped my bloodshot eyes with the sleeve of my grey shirt. Lexi went on. "You're right. There was no way we could have forseen this, but here we are now. I know it's not good, but we'll figure out a way back, because that's what humans do. We may not be stronger than fate, but we're smarter. Before we know it, we'll be back in Seattle, wishing we had something to fill our time again. Kapeesh?"

All the anger from her voice was gone. Now her tone was more maternal, her soothing voice putting me at ease more than the words she spoke. Slowly, I took deep breaths, and regained my composure. When I sat up, I noticed the damp patches on the tablecloth where my eyes had been. I felt like such an idiot, falling apart right there in front of her. "How can you be so calm?" I asked her. "How can you be so optimistic when we're stranded here for what might be the rest of our life?"

"I wish I could say I'm not scared, but I am. I'm just as afraid as you. But no matter what, I still have my body, my mind, and my soul. And where there's a will, there's a way. So stop feeling sorry for yourself and let's make the best of what we've been given, even if it's not what we expected."

I was surprised at Lexi. Usually, she was the emotional one, and I was as objective as I could be, yet here I was, crying my eyes out, while she was the voice of reason between the two of us. Maybe something changed when she woke up here, or maybe she had always been like this, she just didn't know it. Either way, she was right.

The small wooden door to the right swung open on a single, large iron hinge with an ear-piercing creak, revealing Tiff in the frame, now separate from her flusher brother and the two floating balls. In one hand, she held a fistful of silverware, and in the other was 3 more pearly platters. "The mayor said that he forgot to give you these plates," She started to trail off, probably she'd heard me have a mental breakdown from behind the thin plane of mahogany. My face was getting hotter by the second. Without another word, Tiff set the contents of her grip in the center of the table, and scurried back into the kitchen, slamming the door behind her. I realized that I was still holding the clear, undetailed glass for the place next to me. Gingerly, I set the cup down, afraid that I was gonna ruin something else in my godforsaken life. The fork and knife I had in my other hand were covered in sweat. Embarrassed, I wiped them off and swapped them out for my place.

I carefully arranged my plate and napkin to cover up the two wet spots on the tablecloth where my eyes had been. The chipped white surface didn't have any texture at all, something that I pondered absentmindedly while the mayor went on with the formalities that had to take place before we could eat. "As the mayor of Cappytown, I know I speak for everyone when I say that we are pleased and honored to welcome our guest, Kirby, the Star Warrior, and our other two visitors, with whom we hope to extend our warmest hospitalities."

I took a swig from the small glass of transparent orange liquid that fizzed and bubbled in the glass. It tasted like Fanta, except it was way sweeter. The drink tasted like orange-flavored honey.

"I can speak for myself, thank you!" Bellowed the cappy who had interrupted our fight with Dedede and his henchman, looking ready to quickly stand to his feet.

"We all know that, Chief Bookum!" The mayor made a motion for him to calm down. There was a snicker from the other side of the table.

"Let's hurry up and eat!" Tuff lightly pounded a fist on the table.

"Kirby doesn't understand what you're saying anyway." Tuff added. "And I doubt they care what you have to say either." She pointed to Lexi and I.

As much as I don't appreciate people speaking on my behalf without asking me first, I also felt a savage urge to consume something of substance, so I kept quiet.

"Then let's dig in, shall we?" The mayor grabbed a fork with his stub hand. What happened next seemed to go in slow motion. I saw Kirby's mouth expand to almost three times its original size, and a whirlwind pulled every scrap of the luxurious feast right past my eyes, into the maw of the pink creature seated on the short end of the table to my left. Desperately, I reached out, and managed to snag a french baguette flying by. Everything else, including the tablecloth, and most of the plates, was lost forever. Kirby sat, perfectly content with the fact that he had just eaten a hearty feast meant for twelve mouths, sucking a jelly spoon behind a mountain of bowls and glasses.

"Ugh! I knew I should've started eating!" Tuff collapsed onto the table. Lexi and I were both too stunned to talk.

"Hey! What's the big idea Kirby!?" Tiff slammed a fist on the table. Kirby didn't respond, instead walking out the small opening under the top half of the door. The two kids ran off, accompanied by the fololo and falala. I sat there, but Lexi grabbed my arm and pulled me out the door. I gripped tightly the loaf of bread as I was roughly ushered out into the autumn night.

Kirby stopped at the edge of a shallow divot in the terrain. "Kirby, Wait!" Tiff called after her, running with Tuff, Fololo, and Falala to catch up. The four of them halted instantly next to Kirby, staring down into the ditch in awe. As I got closer, I saw what they were staring at. In the crater lay at least 24 skeletons, their pale, gnawed bones leaving a rotting stench in the air. They were probably sheep, adults, all males. The bones shook me, because if the monster we were dealing with, if there was a monster at all, had done all this, how much trouble could it take to finish me off?

"Did you do this?" Tiff glared an "Im not mad I'm just disappointed" look at Kirby.

"Maybe Kirby really is the monster!" Falala strafed to the right to look at him.

"We can't stay here! Come on!"

We ran into a small shepherd's hut. On the walls hung several farm tools, suspended on wooden hooks above large hemp sacks of seeds, and piles of hay. The only light came from cracks under the door.

"You are the one who ate all those sheep, aren't 'ya?" Tuff shook his fist at Kirby.

I scoffed. "You think he did this? That dinner was one thing, but there were at least two dozen sheep there! I don't even think he could manage that!"

"I'm not so sure, Ethan. In the games, he could eat way bigger things, and as much as he wanted. But I refuse to believe that Kirby is a monster!" Lexi contradicted.

Tiff looked at Lexi confused for a second, but pressed on. "If you tell us the truth, Kirby, maybe we can help you!"

"Help him?" I snorted. "What're you gonna do? Send him to sheep-eaters anonymous? Get him a job at waste disposal?"

"Maybe we could help him control his apetite!" Fololo suggested.

"What're you, a therapist?" Lexi asked sarcastically. "I think we sh-"

Lexi was cut off by the sound of heavy clanking metal on the other side of the door. Silently, we listened as the footsteps got closer.

"If you tell us the truth, Kirby, maybe we can help ya." Tiff whispered. Kirby let out a sort of confused sigh.

"But if you don't, you're history!" Tuff shouted, before quickly covering his mouth when he remembered that we were trying to be quiet.

"U sih ri wus tha?" The gibberish came from the other side of the door in a deep, vaguely Dutch accent.

"It came from in that shack!" Another voice added in, which was a weird mixture between Crocodile Dundee and someone who rasped every word they say.

"Wonder it brown su roddy eh" The first voice responded. I heard footsteps backing up, then a loud pummel as one of them kicked the hut's door down.

The door made a splintering sound when it crashed against the hardwood floor inside. In the bright moonlight, two silhouettes stood on the edges of the doorway, their hands ready to pull out a sword that hung at their side in a sheath.

"It's Tiff!"

"An sor ahy Tuff."

"Hi Sword, hi Blade!" Tiff was being about as inconspicuous that she was hiding something as a truck barrelling down the highway going 220. "What're you doing here?"

"We're lookin' fo a bloke named Kirby."

"Hey that's funny, so are we!"

"But he sure ain't here!" Tuff laughed nervously.

One of the knights looked like he was gonna say something, but they were cut off by Lexi.

"So why, exactly, do you want to know where he is?" Lexi was trying to cover up the obvious lie.

"That's on a need-to-know basis, missy. Now clear out'a the shack so we can search it!"

"Don't waste your time sifting through a bunch of wheat," I put on a straight face. "We saw him run off towards that watermelon patch. I bet if you went there you could find him."

"I, am not so sure." A mysterious, deep hispanic voice came from beyond our sight. Slowly, a third figure emerged, shrouded in shadows. As he stepped closer in, I could see his iconic mask, the circle with a chevron cutout that defined Meta Knight. In the games, he was fearsome, but seeing him now, his meager size ruined the effect completely. Without another word, he dove at Tiff with his signature golden sword, and she just barely dodged the razor-sharp point. The sword stabbed harmlessly into the fiber sack behind her, and with a swift flick of the wrist, he sent the sack flying into the ceiling, leaving only Kirby exposed and oblivious. As Meta Knight stared, his eyes flipping from te usual yellow, to a deep cyan. All around me, the shed was gone. Everywhere I looked, a brilliant purple nebula shone, with all the shimmering of the greater cosmos within. Both Kiry and Meta Knight's eyes flashed a pure neon white; sparks crackled from teit pupils. "It is… true!" Suddenly, with another flash, the shed was back. With an overly fake-mysterious flutter of his cape, he silently stepped back into the night.

"Please Meta Knight, don't tell the king!" Tiff ran out beside the figure, who stood motionless against the bright moonlight.

"The king is not the problem. For now." He didn't turn around. "Now, we have to find the real monster."

There was a distant sound of an explosion. We turned to the noise, to see a plume of smoke rising from a parapet of the castle in the distance.

"What was that?" Tiff turned around. In the distance, Kirby had already gone past the horizon. Frantically, we chased after him, yet again.

Tiff led us up a series of back entrances to an ornate throne room. On one end, there was a brass dais, built to be used as a lazy chair. On the other, Dedede brandished a mallet, his eyes glowing a jade green, and repeatedly attempted to smack Kirby. We ran to try and stop him, but He hit a pillar, and a section of the ceiling crumbled in on us. I dove under the ruined support, covering the top of my head from the falling debris. The hammer came down again, Dedede putting his full weight into the swing. With the motion, a small, glistening star tumbled out of his pocket. It rolled on it's points, down next to Tiff. Then I saw an octopus, sitting on the end of a fish tank, seeming to puppet Dedede's every move. Making a rush from the pillar, I ducked under a low swing, and made a grab for it. As soon as I tried, the thing grew, first twice it's size, then ten times. Dedede stopped his attack and stood stunned. Now it was at least a hundred times as big, the meager tank shattered under the weight of it, then the table. A tentacle extended, and with one fell swoop, obliterated 5 stone pillars. Another tentacle gave chase. I ran, but the thing continued to follow me. There was a hallway behind the throne room, that led to an open balcony, at least 100 feet above ground level. When it had almost overtaken me, I made a desperate jump through one of the arches to the open air below. Panicking, I tried to grab onto a support beam suspended below. I landed my hand on the wooden timber. The ground shook, and I almost lost balance, but somehow, my grip remained. But I couldn't hold on for much longer. About another 20 feet up, I could see Tiff, Tuff, and Meta Knight gazing at a battlement, where Kirby faced the colossal creature. No longer stuck to the floor, it seemed to levitate with the arcane forces that bound it, and orbiting around it were hundreds, if not thousands, of smaller octopi. One by one, they attempted to batter Kirby, but each failed as they were sucked in at the maw. The octopus cried out in rage, and it's whole body seemed to erupt in flame. From each of its tentacles' suckers, more and more spawn came out, this time engulfed in an orange flame that split the midnight air. If I were paying attention I probably would have seen Kirby suck them up again, giving him the fire ability, but one of the living missiles slammed itself into the castle wall next to me, rattling the beam. I lost one hand's grip, than the other. I could feel the G force pulling me towards the cold stone ground, where I would easily be pureed as soon as the impact hit. But something warm grabbed my hand. I looked up to see Lexi, pulling with all her might to support my body.

"Come on," Lexi grunted through her strain. "I've got you."

But then, she lost her balance as the floor caved in, knocking her over the side, putting us both into freefall. We fell and fell, for what seemed like forever. Was this really how we died? But just before we could hit the ground, another hand caught mine and Lexi's shirt, and our descent slowed like a parachute. We were only falling at the speed of a feather when we touched the floor. I looked up to see Meta Knight holding us, his batlike wings outstretched as he strained to support us.

I wanted to thank him, but I wasn't sure what to say. "Listen, I-" I tried to say, but I was interrupted by a gigantic blaze of orange light, erupting in a cone from way above. With it, the gigantic cephalopod was ejected into the night sky. There was shouting from the parapet where Tiff and Tuff were, but I could barely hear it. I didn't have the energy to care.

In the verdant field, the gold of Kirby's newly-repaired starship shone the late-morning sunlight across the grass. The chaos of last night seemed long-since gone, but the feeling remained. I doubt I could've slept if I hadn't been physically and mentally exhausted from the events that transpired.

"I wish you would've stayed a little longer, Kirby!" Tiff smiled.

Kirby didn't respond. Instead, he turned around, and stared back at us.

"I hate long goodbyes, so just get on your ship and go!" Tiff crossed her arms and looked away.

There was the sound of an engine approaching from behind. I turned around just fast enough to see the 2 ton jeep driven by Escargoon almost barrel straight through me. In the vehicle's gunner seat was Dedede.

"What do those assholes want now?" I muttered.

"Make sure to come visit us!" Tuff called, running after the ship, which was quickly picking up speed.

"We'll make sure that don't happen!" Dedede guffawed, making a motion to Escargoon, who now gripped an electronic detonator.

"Goodbye for good!" He readied his hands to push down, but before he could hit the plunger, another hand caught the bottom.

You've caused us too much trouble already!" Lexi tensed her muscles, holding against the bar with all her strength. "I'm not letting you press whatever this is, too!"

Escargoon pressed and pressed, and eventually, he got the plunger to push in fully. Both of us waited in anticipation for the inevitable boom.

But nothing happened. He tried pressing it again. Still nothing.

"Sire, the ship got out of range!"

Dedede grunted. "Good riddance I say. Little fella won't make it a day in the sky!"

Escargoon pushed Lexi back, making her land next to me on the ground.

"And don't come back, Kirbeh!" Dedede jeered at the sky. The two of them ripped back out of the field as quickly as they came, leaving only a set of treads behind.

Tiff stopped, out of breath, next to us, closely followed by Tuff, Fololo, and Falala.

"I hope he's alright up there…" Tiff swooned.

"He's a Star Warrior, He'll be fine!" Tuff punched at the air.

"It is not Kirby that we need to worry about. "

Behind me stood Meta Knight. How long he'd been there only god knows.

"What do you mean?" Tiff felt in her pocket. "Huh?" She pulled out the small, golden star from before out of her pocket. "Oh no! I forgot to give this back to Kirby!" Tiff moved to put it back.

"You must give that to me." Meta Knight held out his hand. "You don't understand it's power." Reluctantly, Tiff handed it over.

"So, I don't get it. Are you on our side, or…?" I patted my pocket, realizing, shockingly, I somehow still had my phone through all that. I turned to get a response from the figure.

But Meta Knight was gone.

A crimson cluster blanketed the small green map that was holographically projected onto the steel board. More and more dots were appearing by the minute, the older ones disappearing, in an infinite cycle of death and rebirth. It seemed, in essence, ironically like the map's user. Callously, her fingers brushed over each of the virtual spots that represented another Star Warrior meeting the same fate. NME's genocidal campaign was, of course, working extremely efficiently, just like it had been the other thousand times. She adjusted her raven hair to get a better view of the screen in front of her.

"Commander, we have some disturbing news." A nameless soldier stepped onto the bridge behind her. She swiveled around in her chair with the never-changing, jaded expression that defined her.

"The Star Warrior, Kirby, has left the target zone. Should we prepare an armada to go after him?"

"What?! How did this happen! Didn't our client's explosives do the trick on his ship?" She got up from the chair.

"Well, they were never used…" The soldier backed away from her.

"What? That's not possible! I've seen timeline after timeline! Dedede blows up Kirby's ship, and he gets stuck there. Without fail!"

"There's something else, too. We have some unexpected complications. Namely, two other kids. We have pictures."

She looked despondently on the screen, showing a tall, skinny girl and a smaller, but sturdier-looking boy.

"What are their names?"

"We don't know."

"Well find out. And don't come back until you do. I want to have a little heart-to-heart with them."

"Understood."

The iris door closed behind him as he stepped out of the room, letting go a pneumatic whish as the airlock resealed.

She chuckled to herself.

This is gonna be fun.