AN: My first foray into the Merlin fandom, facilitated by extra free time due to social distancing. I hope you're all staying safe.

I've been a long time fan of the show, but never actually sat down to write something for it. Hope this is okay, please do leave me any feedback. Updates should be regular and relatively quick (for once!)

CHAPTER 1

"Gewican ge stanas!"

Arthur didn't hear the spell, but he saw Merlin's mouth moving as his eyes glowed gold. His hand was stretched weakly out and, as the King's jaw dropped, so too did a wall of boulder and rock which obscured his manservant from view. For some moments all he could do was stand and stare, heart thumping in his ears.

Merlin is a sorcerer.

He had used magic. His servant - his idiotic, goofy, wonderful servant - had used magic.

Merlin saved me.

That much had to be true. And, realising this, Arthur threw aside his sword and rushed forward, frantically clawing at the boulders. But half an hour on he was sweaty, tired and had barely made a dent.

Merlin is in danger.

He picked his sword back up and staggered resolutely through the woods. When he finally happened upon Leon and the others, he didn't speak of the magic, but said only,

"Merlin needs us."

They made for Camelot with all haste.

He gathered his knights in the council chamber to tell them of the ambush. Guinevere, having noticed his dour demeanour, cast him occasional probing looks as they all discussed what should be done next.

"Where's Merlin?"

Gaius. Arthur hadn't even considered Gaius. Did he know?

"He's alive. Last I saw of him, he was still alive." Arthur turned to Leon. "Dispatch patrols at first light. Scour every inch of that forest."

"Yes, sire."

Arthur waited for the knights to depart, then addressed the two guards in the room. "Leave us. I would like to speak with Gaius and Guinevere in private."

"Arthur?" Concern shone in Gwen's eyes. "What is it?"

"Hold on." Arthur waited until the door had shut behind the two guards. "What I have to say does not leave this room."

"Is it about Merlin?"

Arthur considered the physician. He knew Gaius had practised magic in the days before the purge... Did he already know? Could he be trusted?

In the time since he had seen Merlin's golden eyes, Arthur had thought a great deal. He thought of all those other times when all had seemed lost and some miracle had saved him. The Questing Beast, the Great Dragon, far too many falling tree branches... He thought of the druids, a peaceful people in spite of their magic.

"Arthur?" Gwen's gentle enquiry jolted him from his reverie. He cleared his throat.

"Merlin used magic."

She gasped, a hand flying to her mouth, but Arthur saw this in his periphery only. His sights were set firmly on Gaius, who stared back impassively.

"You knew?"

"Yes, Sire."

"How long?"

"Since he was born, Sire."

"What?" Gwen looked between the two of them in disbelief. "But how? How could he have possibly kept it hidden, in Camelot of all places?"

Gaius sighed heavily and Arthur was struck suddenly by just how old he looked. "It is a long and complicated story."

Arthur sat at the council table, gesturing to the seat across from him. "Tell us everything."

Gaius approached the King cautiously. "I could not possibly tell you everything. Only Merlin can do that." He hovered above his seat, eyeing Arthur warily. "If that is even possible."

Arthur frowned at the implicit accusation. "I didn't hurt him. He was injured by mercenaries."

"How?" Gaius demanded. "He is powerful, my Lord. More powerful than you can fathom. How is it he came to be injured?"

"I... I didn't see," Arthur replied, nonplussed. More powerful than you can fathom. "I turned and he was on the ground. He took a mace to the chest."

"He must have been protecting you then." Gaius lowered himself into a chair with a soft groan. "My dear boy..."

Glowing eyes. An outstretched hand.

"He caused a rockfall. Cut me off from the mercenaries. I saw- saw his eyes. They were gold."

Gwen, still stood behind him, gasped again at a sudden realisation.

"He cured my father!" She shook her head in disbelief. "He was the only one who recovered from that sickness, do you remember? And Merlin knew. He knew before I told anyone else. I always wondered how, but I never thought... He risked all that, for me?"

It should not have been surprising, Arthur reflected. Merlin had risked life and limb for all of them, time and time again. Was it any wonder that his magic would assist?

"What do you mean, he was born with it?" he questioned Gaius. "I thought magic was taught, not inherited. A choice."

"Some are born with the ability, Sire. Morgana was. And Merlin too, but Merlin- Merlin is different." Gaius smiled sadly. "He was able to move objects with his mind before he could even talk. It drove poor Hunith to distraction, trying to keep his talents hidden in a town so small as Ealdor."

I just didn't fit in anymore. I wanted to find somewhere that I did.

Had any luck?

I'm not sure yet.

"It wasn't Will, was it?" Gwen had moved to sit beside Arthur, so the two of them both faced Gaius. "Who conjured that whirlwind, when we all went to Ealdor? It was Merlin."

"Indeed. Just as it wasn't Lancelot who killed the griffin, or Uther who killed the Black Knight." Gaius looked to the King apprehensively. "He even tried to cure your father."

Arthur stiffened. "You mean... that old man..."

"It was not his fault." Gaius leant forward, earnest. "It was Morgana's doing."

Arthur scoffed. "How? She was nowhere near."

"There is a traitor in our midst." Gaius's eyes flickered briefly to the doors, still closed, but he dropped his voice a decibel all the same. "Agravaine."

Arthur dropped his head into his hands. "No. That can't be."

"That old man," Gwen interjected, thoughtful. "He was the same man who claimed to have placed a poultice under Arthur's pillow. That was Merlin?"

"Merlin under an ageing spell." Gaius quirked a smile, which faded quickly as he saw Arthur's thunderous expression. "The poultice was Morgana's doing, but Uther needed a scapegoat. But Arthur, he never wanted to hurt your father. Even in the earliest days, he was the one to save Uther from Edwin's machinations, not I. He saved him from many of Morgana's plots."

"Why? Why would he do that?"

"Because of you," Gaius said simply. "He does it all for you, Arthur. He knew how it would hurt you, should your father come to harm."

You've been here all night?

I didn't want you to feel that you were alone.

You're a loyal friend, Merlin.

"I am not lying, Arthur," Gaius's voice, still hushed, was fiercer and more determined than Arthur had ever heard it. "What reason have I? I'm as good as dead already for harbouring a sorcerer. Kill me if you must, but I beg you to consider what I say."

Arthur recoiled. "Gaius... I would never... I could never..."

"Your father would have."

"I am not my father," Arthur near-yelled, then lowered his voice at Gwen's gentle shushing. The three of them glanced again to the closed door and Arthur waited a moment before continuing. "Merlin knows that I am not my father."

"He came close so many times to telling you. I always advised against it. I couldn't bear for him to risk his life like that and after- after Aredian I think he began to understand just how much danger he was in. You must understand sire, he has lived his whole life in secrecy. It is a hard habit to break."

"Arthur." Gwen covered his hand with hers, but the grief for his father was still fresh in his heart; he stared resolutely at the table, blinking away tears. "I do not believe Merlin is evil."

But Arthur hadn't believed Morgana to be evil either, or Agravaine. All those who had entered into his life only to betray him, poisoned by magic.

"He is our friend." Guinevere tightened her grip on his hand, tugging it so he would face her. Her eyes sparkled with surety and he felt more than ever how he wanted her not just as a wife, but as a queen. "He used magic today to save you, even at risk of his own life. I cannot hate him for that."

Arthur disentangled his hand from hers, and stood. Gaius watched defiantly, and Arthur was reminded of himself on every occasion he had directly defied his father.

"I will wait to pass judgement. As you have said I need to hear it from Merlin himself. I owe him that, if nothing else."

Gaius eased himself slowly from the chair, face finally sagging with the weight of his worry. "I only hope you get the chance."

"We'll find him, Gaius." Arthur went to grasp the physician's shoulder, the gesture feeling strange with all that had just been revealed between them. "We will."

He tossed and turned deep into the night, thinking again on all those moments which made up his friendship with Merlin; all those things he had taken for granted. Bouts of unconsciousness and concussions which could cover a multitude of sins; Merlin's mysterious recovery from the touch of the Dorocha; and then there were those curious moments of wisdom and solemnity from his manservant, which he treasured just as much as their lighthearted banter.

Destinies are troublesome things. You feel trapped. Like your whole life has been planned out for you and you've got no control over anything and sometimes you don't even know if what destiny has decided is really the best thing at all.

How come you're so knowledgeable?

I read a book.

There was a hysterical edge to Arthur's laughter as he recalled that particular conversation. How could he have been so blind?

There's something about you, Merlin.

He'd known it from the first day. It was obvious. So was it really Merlin's fault, for not telling him his secret? Or Arthur's, for not seeking it out?

"We have scoured the forest."

"Scour it again."

"Sire, there is no sign of Merlin."

"None, but this." Agravaine slammed down a bloody scrap of Merlin's brown jacket. Did he sound as smug as Arthur thought he did, or was it the suspicion planted by Gaius which made him think so? "I am sorry you've lost such a loyal and-"

He raised a hand, swallowing rage. If Agravaine was the traitor, he knew where Merlin was. He had cut this bloodied swathe of material from Merlin's injured body. Merlin's dead body?

"The mercenaries, what news of them?"

"We found no trace," Sir Leon said, and Arthur tried for a moment to imagine that he was the traitor. He found he couldn't.

"Surely sent by that snake Alinor," Agravaine's suggestion came just a little too fast.

"It can't be. How?" Arthur could not bite back his impatience and hoped it wasn't too noticeable. "Our route was known only to a few within Camelot."

"Then there's only one conclusion we can draw," Leon said solemnly. "We have a traitor in our midst."

Another night of restless sleep. Perhaps he would never hear of Merlin's magic from Merlin himself. Perhaps he was already dead, buried on Agravaine and Morgana's orders in some distant wood. Perhaps he was lost to slavers. Perhaps, perhaps, perhaps.

He resolved to patrol himself, tomorrow. If Agravaine really wasn't to be trusted, then he would surely have sabotaged the search. Even if Merlin were dead, Gaius deserved a proper burial.

Just for Gaius? A voice, Merlin's, rose unbidden to the forefront of his mind. You know he's been quietly breaking one of Camelot's foremost laws for years now, don't you?

Just like that, Arthur found himself laughing again.

"Even when you're not here, you have a knack for cheering people up," he whispered to the darkness, and instantly felt like an idiot. He yearned for sleep, but every time he tried to clear his mind he was left with the burning imprint of Merlin's glowing eyes. When he did, hours later, finally succumb to slumber his dreams were filled with disjointed images. Pyres from his father's time, a dragon he thought he had slain, and a glowing blue orb leading him, always, to safety...