Byleth has been to this place before.
They have held their Eagles close so that they can stay warm throughout the Silver Snow. They isolated themselves and cried alone 'neath the Azure Moon. Now, they surge forward with the guidance of the Verdant Wind.
They have fought in this war three times now, and no conclusion so far has been satisfying: Byleth was too indecisive to be Archbishop, Dimitri was too lax to fulfill Edelgard's wishes, and even now, Byleth doesn't believe that Claude can follow-through. Byleth knows the enemy by now, and it is not the woman they fell in love with under the White Clouds. So they return, again and again. That is why Byleth stomps through Enbarr flanked by Eagles, Lion, and Deer. Their army is larger and more formidable than ever before.
Byleth chose Dimitri the second time because they thought with their guidance, Dimitri could serve as a shield to the Church of Seiros, that no students would need to be killed. But Byleth was wrong, oh so very wrong about the man. Ferdinand passed away in a heroic charge along the Bridge of Myrrdin. Bernadetta's corpse was cremated before it could ever be retrieved at Gronder. Caspar and Linhardt were blasted into oblivion trying in vain to hold Fort Merceus. Dorothea collapsed before the Opera House that saved her life long ago, and Petra died in a righteous and earned fury.
Hubert fell and then Edelgard became a Beast. Dimitri seemed to look down on her for becoming… that — thing… but all Byleth saw was anguish and a desperation to be understood.
It was wrong. So this time, Byleth chose Claude, hoping his neutrality might be the key to making this war go correctly for once. As a precaution, Byleth spent every moment at the training grounds, working themselves into exhaustion to ensure that they could learn every last technique that could possibly win over their former students.
They ran up mountains weighed down by heavy armor for Ferdinand's sake. Punched dummies until their knuckles bled for Caspar. Took up magic for Linhardt, Dorothea, and Annette. Did everything in their power to at least keep their students off the enemy lines.
This battle is to be decisive, the true end to the war. When it comes time to storm the Throne Room, Byleth waves their soldiers away; they know that the deeper Edelgard is backed into a corner, the more likely she is to release her true strength and become that monster again. So the battle must be as mild as possible, and Byleth's strategy proves true when they face off with a very human Edelgard, her soft face wracked with despair at the corpses littered everywhere.
Edelgard loses the battle quickly; but something tells Byleth that it's not from their own skill, but a lack of effort on their student's part.
Edelgard falls over her ax, breathing heavily, The Crest Stone to her pseudo-relic fades as life drains from her complexion. This is familiar, Byleth has been here before too. This is exactly how it went in their first confrontation.
Edelgard's voice quakes, and she begs for death. "All over the world, people are killing each other." She might as well be crying.
Byleth steps towards Edelgard, both hands clasped around the Sword of the Creator. They wish that she could look down at the Emperor with disdain, but they are not strong enough for that. Anytime the two of them are close, Byleth remembers the night of the ball, atop the Goddess Tower, when they accidentally bumped into each other.
The next day, Edelgard opened up and revealed to Byleth the secret of their twin Crests. She spoke with such passion for what needed to be done to fix the world, and Byleth was prepared for that battle. But they weren't prepared for their best friend to be the Flame Emperor.
Rhea asked Byleth to kill Edelgard, and they felt their heart beat for the first time. It scared them, so they followed orders and stayed back. That was fifteen years ago, Byleth feels foolish for even considering it. They should move on, but they can't, and the ability to wind back the hands of time is… irresistible. To keep Edelgard alive, to give her a chance.
War is supposed to be deeper than this.
Byleth looks into Edelgard's eye and remembers the disaster Fodlan in every timeline; they remember the unjust class system that never changes, and imagines how disappointed Edelgard would be knowing what their teacher became, or what their teacher let happen.
Byleth has won this war three times now, and it has always been to defend the status quo.
"If I… must fall…" Edelgard gasps, lurching forward, nearly succumbing to the irreversible wounds in her stomach. Byleth may not even need to raise their sword to kill someone so weak. "...then let it be your hand."
But then come those words.
Edelgard looks up at Byleth, and there is this odd, knowing look in her eyes, one that pierces Byleth's entire soul, their entire history. "...I wanted to walk with you…"
...what?
How could she possibly know?
How could this Edelgard know about that? About the Academy days where Edelgard would leer at Byleth with dark expressions and ask, "Would you walk this path with me, my teacher?"
Byleth would smile gently and say, "Yes," innocuously not foreseeing what was to come next.
Devastated.
Byleth doesn't hear the rest of what Edelgard has to say; they can't. They can't keep doing this, so they jam their eyes shut and raise their sword high. It has to end right now. They can't second guess this.
Though Byleth swings the sword to split Edelgard's skull, it never makes contact. They hesitate, and call on the power of the Divine Pulse.
Five years erased again. They are a coward.
…
Byleth cranes their neck up and they're back in Remire, back to the moment they died protecting this girl they've never known before. Byleth steps away from the fallen Kostas, eyes catching on Edelgard.
Edelgard is supposed to look back at Byleth with relief — but she doesn't. She's scared. Sweat forms at her brow and her eyes are so wide. "Why?"
The word echoes in Byleth's mind, and Sothis snickers. The rest of the day passes on as normal, with Alois stumbling upon Jeralt and roping him back into the Knights of Seiros.
Byleth remembers that Edelgard looks straight ahead, eyes focused on no one, when they follow the path to Garreg Mach. This time, Byleth keeps catching her sneaking glances. Maybe Byleth misremembered, they do remember how it always felt like Edelgard was watching them.
But not this much. Byleth doesn't think it was like that.
The first time Byleth chose their House, they picked Edelgard out of some kind of reluctance. Dimitri was standoff-ish, and Claude came on too strong. Edelgard on the other hand came off like she didn't give a fuck about Byleth, and Byleth kinda liked that.
The second time, they spent hours in the courtyard speaking with the Blue Lions and Golden Deer at length. They pointedly ignored the Black Eagles.
The third time, they beelined to the Golden Deer knowing that had to be the answer.
This time, the fourth time, the sun sets when Byleth is still talking to the students. Seteth gets a little cross and drags Byleth back to Rhea. Dammit, they're not ready! They need more time!
"You've had enough time, don't you think?" Sothis laughs.
No matter which House they pick, people die. Edelgard's dreams go to waste and nothing changes. It doesn't feel like it matters. You could give Byleth a blindfold and spin them around and the war wouldn't change.
...unless…
"I wouldn't do that if I were you," Sothis warns, sensing Byleth's rapidly moving thoughts. "You know she's — "
"I choose Edelgard," Byleth announces abruptly. "Um, I mean the Black Eagles."
That earns a smirk from Manuela at least. Hanneman sorts, tugging down on his mustache to hide a possible snigger.
Byleth returns to the courtyard to find all the students gathered in a crowd, waiting with eager anticipation. Dimitri, Claude, and Edelgard all stand up front. Though it's Dimitri and Claude who are the most attentive. Edelgard looks off to the side with a forlorn expression, her arms crossed. Like she's not even counting herself as an option.
"Maybe next time, Claude," Byleth laughs, sauntering over to Edelgard. "You too Dimitri."
And they mean that too. Next time.
...or… do they?
There's this clammy revulsion in Byleth's chest, it's so… odd. Their skin crawls and they feel so weak so suddenly. They freeze in place and try to focus, try to replay the moment when they were a bit more insulting than they should have been with Claude and Dimitri, but nothing comes.
They can't go back.
"We'll discuss it later," Sothis chides. "Go talk to your new friend."
Edelgard looks up, carrying a more bewildered expression than she offers even Ferdinand. "Don't tell me you're picking me, are you?"
Byleth sizes her up. "I am."
Hubert draws close, nearly baring his teeth. Byleth swears that guy is for real some kind of — bat… person. Not human.
"It's alright, Hubert," Edelgard moans. "I just — misread you, is all. Come, we should all talk."
…
It's almost nostalgic replaying Byleth's first conversation with their students, and it's nice to be near them and have a chance once again to help them grow.
But Edelgard does really bother Byleth. Something is wrong, it's as if Edelgard already knows.
Byleth stumbles on some of their words; they're about to retell a story about the time they learned they needed to go outside of their comfort zones to survive. Mostly to inspire Dorothea to learn Faith Magic. "I think… we should call it a night there. Edelgard, would you mind staying behind for a moment?"
Edelgard winces, but nods back. "Yes, my teacher."
Oh, those words. Music to Byleth's ears… but why so soon? Byleth doesn't remember Edelgard calling them that for a while…
…
"Hi," Byleth says slowly.
"Hello," Edelgard grunts back, seemingly confused.
Ugh, Byleth doesn't know how to ask it. "Then don't bring it up, you dolt!" There has to be a way to articulate how to… "There isn't!" You know, keep this up, and maybe I'll wander into Solon's black void a lot earlier. "...phooey." Yep. Phooey.
"Why were you so convinced I was going to pick a different House?" Byleth asks.
That seems to change the energy in the room. Edelgard looks away again, it's so unlike her to be this… small. "I just kinda figured," she mutters.
That's not a good enough explanation.
"I'm choosing you for a reason…" Byleth says so carefully, their lips chapped and dry. They could end their sentence there, but they know that won't fix this. Things will be the same, people will die, friends will die, it's war. So Byleth tries something a little daring. "...El."
Edelgard's eyes go so wide. There it is.
"You buffoon! Stop this at once!"
Byleth ignores that and steps closer. Edelgard steps back. That makes Byleth sad for some reason.
"How do you know about that?" Edelgard's voice quakes.
"You told me," Byleth shrugs. "A long time ago, El. Before the war… you remember it, don't you."
Byleth makes sure to express that as a statement.
"If she pulls out her ax, just know you can't Divine Pulse your ass out of this one."
Edelgard's face gets so focused, she flips this idea over and over in her mind, and then finally…
"I remember."
If Byleth were holding something, they would have dropped it— oh, they were holding something. Thud.
Edelgard slips some hair behind her ear. "It's all… blurry, but I sense it. I know there's a different version of you, different timelines. Professor, I want you to pick a different House; that is what's safest for the two of us."
"No," Byleth says. "I choose you, Edelgard."
Edelgard squeezes her fists tight. "What are you going to do? Kill me again?"
Byleth nearly gasps. Oh no oh no oh no oh no, this is all wrong…
"You did kill me, didn't you?" Edelgard looks away. "I… I shouldn't be here."
"N-no, please," Byleth lunges forward and grabs Edelgard's arm. They're lucky Edelgard doesn't strike right then and there. "Please. I'm… the first time, I chose you and you… you betrayed us. You betrayed humanity and allied with those… monsters."
Edelgard dips her head low so that her hair covers her eyes. Though Byleth doesn't have a heartbeat of their own, they can feel Edelgard's heartbeat getting dangerously fast. Like she might pass out soon if anymore stress is put on her.
"Don't say that," Edelgard sounds so fierce, like the Flame Emperor with a heart of ice. "I'm fighting for humanity. If people are strong, and reach out for each other… there's no need for Gods."
That shakes Byleth to their core.
"This isn't real," Edelgard whispers, voice frail as a child's.
"It is, El," Byleth urges. "I don't know why — maybe it's because we both share the Crest of Flames, I'm not sure, but… I've been fighting your war for decades."
Again, Edelgard is so stunned. She falls over into a chair and clutches her face, pinching the bridge of her nose and possibly biting down on her tongue. "So what? You're here to stop the war from ever happening?"
"No, I'm not."
Maybe this was a mistake. Maybe telling Edelgard was wrong, and now nothing will go as it's supposed to. Where can they even go from here?
"I want to help you, El," Byleth feels tears come to their eyes, it's still odd for them to cry. They cried once when their father died, and again when he died the second time. But by the third time it was almost routine how powerless Byleth really was to change the hands of fate. Now, standing here in their classroom, they cry. They fall to their knees and weep. "I need to help you."
Edelgard tilts her head to the side curiously, her own anxieties vanishing at the sight of her fallen teacher. "I… I suppose you aren't giving me a choice. My uncle won't like this… I can't allow this. If he finds out, he'll… he'll come here and hurt you. If you truly know as much as you do, you should go."
"Your Uncle's a bastard," Byleth growls. They remember what they saw over the course of the war, how separate Thales was from Edelgard. How he gloated in what he had done to destroy her body and weaponize her. How little he cared for in Shambala. Disgusting. "I want it to be different this time. I want to protect you… from them."
Edelgard's face falls. "You really mean that don't you?" Her voice is so hollow. "It's inevitable, I need their power, I'm not strong enough on my own to — "
"But you are, El."
"...what did you just say?"
"You are strong enough."
Edelgard's pupils dilate. She sweat more from the nerves. Byleth feels bad for hurting them like this. They don't understand what they are doing wrong.
Byleth holds their hand out. They know Edelgard will understand this. "Is it so wrong, El, for someone to reach out their hand to you?"
Edelgard looks at Byleth's hand like it's a full-blown weapon, then looks to her own gloved hand and considers it for so long. By the time she gently peels the glove away, Edelgard's eyes are full of tears. She holds the hand up high, and Byleth sees the thin white lines where she was so cruelly dissected by those monsters.
Edelgard's hand intertwines with Byleth's, and then she falls into their arms sobbing. Byleth holds Edelgard tight. They lean their chin against Edelgard's forehead and whisper into her ear.
This is new.
This is Byleth's chosen path.
Sothis, Byleth thinks. You don't need to explain to me why I can't go back…
I understand.