L isn't quite sure why Matsuda never seems to leave the task force headquarters. Usually, he would say he doesn't really care, and that's exactly what he would say if anyone asked. Why should he care? He shouldn't - he has much better things to worry about, like the Kira case or one of the many other cases he's working on in his spare time, but the thing is that he does care.
Or he's curious at the very least.
Yes, maybe care is too strong of a word for it. He's very curious about why Matsuda, who is so full of energy and life would spend his free time scribbling away in a notebook in his work space. Then again, he knows all that excitement is an act some of the time. Maybe he should pay more attention to the older man because, because now that he's looking, he seems... not sad, exactly, more melancholic.
Everyone else is out for lunch. L is working on one of the smaller cases, or at least he's trying to work on one of the smaller cases, instead he's watching Matsuda, who seems to be completely unaware of his gaze despite the fact that his eyes part from the paper to look up every few seconds.
He seems to be concentrating - brow furrowed and eyes narrowed. It's... almost cute. The second L thinks that he looks away, forcing his eyes back to his computer, but that only lasts a few seconds before he's staring again.
"A - ah, Ryuzaki!" Matsuda stammers when he finally notices. "What is it? Is there something you want me to do?"
"Oh, no," L says. "Was I bothering you?"
"I wasn't - I mean, no! No, it's fine!"
"Are you certain?"
"Yes, I'm sure," Matsuda insists. He starts tapping his pencil against his notebook and L is sure that he's lying about something. Maybe he's uncomfortable. "Ah, Ryuzaki, would you like to - I mean, everyone else is out and it is lunch time..."
L tilts his head. "I could have Watari bring you some food."
"No, I mean-" Matsuda shakes his head. "Nevermind." He starts tapping his pencil again, then he sighs and closes the notebook. He sets it aside and starts looking around the room almost nervously.
"Why are you here?" L asks.
Matsuda's eyes widen, he looks almost hurt. "Wh-what do you mean? I'm here because I want to catch Kira, are you-"
"No, I mean - everyone else has gone out and yet you're still here. Why is that?"
"Oh - oh!" Matsuda laughs and rubs at the back of his neck. "Well, I guess I just don't really have much to do? I, uh, don't really have any friends outside the task force, everyone else has friends or family to spend time with. Oh - but I'm not - asking for sympathy or anything! I'm fine!"
"I see..." L says, pulling a thumb up to bite at the nail. "Well, I can't say I'm not in a similar position. This case is... probably the first time I've ever had any real friends."
"You mean Light, right?"
"Well, yes, I would say he was the very first person I got close enough with to call a friend, but..." he trails off, unsure of where he was going with this particular train of thought. Matsuda doesn't push him to complete the thought or even continue talking at all. "What were you doing? With the notebook, I mean." He makes sure to clarify.
Matsuda flushes and looks away. "It's kind of embarrassing..."
"You don't have to tell me."
"No - no, it's fine. It's just, I've never really told anyone about it before." He laughs awkwardly. "I was, uh, drawing."
L tilts his head curiously. "Drawing," he repeats.
"Yeah, I picked it up a few years ago and it's - well, it's relaxing. I like it." He stares down at his feet.
L stares at him for several long moments and then - "Can I see?"
"Ah?"
"See your drawings. I don't get to see art very often, but I've always found it to be a pleasant experience."
"Oh! Yeah, sure, okay!" Matsuda grins and grabs his notebook - or, L supposes it's probably a sketchbook - then walks over to L and sits in what's usually Light's chair. He pushes the chair next to L and puts the sketchbook down on the table.
On the first page is a beautiful pencil sketch of a park, L believes it's the one just down the street. There's something about it that's breathtaking - there's no colour, very little shading, but it's beautiful. The next few pages are largely nature scenes at a smaller scale, with sprinklings of people and the NPA offices.
As Matsuda flips further into the sketchbook, the nature scenes slowly die away until they're entirely replaced by sketches of the task force members and headquarters. Matsuda's blush deepens the deeper into the book they get.
There's Aizawa getting coffee, Soichiro and Light talking, Mogi doing paperwork, L at his computer, L eating cake, Watari handing out ice cream, the stairs, and on and on.
"These are very good, Matsuda," L says, thumb resting on his lip. "Professional quality even. I'd love to see some of your other work."
Matsuda closes his sketchbook and pulls it towards himself. He looks down and splutters a bit before managing, "O-oh, I - I don't really have much else. I used to paint, but those never turned out very good and it's so time consuming..."
"Would you like to start painting again?"
Matsuda seems taken aback by this and he stammers over his own tongue some more. "I - maybe - I don't know. I think it might be fun and I do have some supplies left over..."
"I could get Watari to bring those supplies here, if you'd like."
"You'd do that?"
L nods. "Yes, it wouldn't be too difficult. He could even pick you up some new paints and brushes or whatever else you might need."
"Oh! That's not necessary, really! Thank you so much, though, Ryuzaki."
"Like I said, it's no problem."
L doesn't know why, but he insists on taking the bag of paints, brushes and papers to Matsuda. Everyone has gone to their apartments in the task force headquarters, and that includes Matsuda.
He knocks on the door to the apartment and waits.
When Matsuda opens the door, he pauses and opens his mouth in surprise before snapping it shut and saying, "Oh! Ryuzaki!"
"Hello, Matsuda. I brought over your paint supplies."
"You actually did that?"
"Yes, I see no reason why I shouldn't have. May I come in?"
Matsuda quickly steps to the side, almost tripping over his own feet, and says, "Oh, yes! Come in, Ryuzaki. I'll take that bag." He takes the bag from L and, once the door is closed and L has strolled in, he walks over to the couches and sets the bag down. L situates himself on the couch as well, leaving a good amount of space between himself and Matsuda as he brings his knees up to his chest and wraps his arms around his legs.
"You know, you don't have to spend time with me," Matsuda mumbles after a few moments of a silence that is somehow both comfortable and very, very uncomfortable.
"I'm aware," L replies. "I'm here because I want to be."
"Oh," Matsuda looks away and laughs. "Would you like something to drink?"
"Sure, some tea would be nice."
Matsuda nods and gets to his feet. He returns a minute later with two cups of gently steaming tea. He hands L the considerably lighter of the two and, upon taking a sip, L is surprised to find that it's exactly how he likes it. He brings this up to Matsuda and thanks up, which causes him to go bright red and mumble something that L can't quite pick up on, but ends with, "-no problem."
As he sits, hands curled around his cup and face downturned, L can't help thinking that he's unfairly cute.
He's not sure what motivates it, but L blurts out, "You know, I think you're quite a bit smarter than you first seem."
Matsuda seems exceptionally flustered by this as he chokes out a thanks and L thinks he should try to throw him off kilter like this more often.
"I've always been interested in painting," L admits.
"O-oh?"
"Yes, but I've never had the time. Maybe we could try it now? We have plenty of time..."
Matsuda grins. "Yeah, yeah, of course! I'd love that, let's get painting!"
Paint stains both of their hands despite quite a lot of scrubbing at the sink.
Matsuda laughs awkwardly and says, "Sorry, Ryuzaki, looks like it isn't coming out."
"Yes, it certainly seems that way," L agrees as he stares at his blue and orange and purple hand.
The painting had been a mixed bag, it wasn't really L's thing and his painting of a sunset had not turned out very good, but Matsuda either downplayed how much experience he had painting, or he was a natural because his turned out amazing. Likely both.
L sits on the couch, Matsuda sits beside him with the space of a cushion between them. L stares at Matsuda, who fidgets and shifts under his intense gaze until L says, "Matsuda."
"...Yes, Ryuzaki?"
"You have paint on your face."
Matsuda goes red yet again and says, "Oh! Ah, I'll go take care of that-" He moves to stand, but L quickly shuffles over to him and pushes him back into the couch. He swallows and says, "Um, Ryuzaki?"
L's gaze narrows in on the smudge of green on his cheek. He raises a hand and Matsuda's eyes go wide as he licks his thumb and brings it up to the stain. Matsuda shivers under his touch and L frowns as he rubs at it until it's faded enough for him to be satisfied.
L starts pulling back but Matsuda grabs his wrist, only to let go immediately and murmur an apology. L doesn't move, he simply leans over Matsuda, one leg outstretched, but otherwise he's completely compacted over him.
"Matsuda..."
"Y-yes, Ryuzaki?"
"Can I kiss you?"
Matsuda swallows and nods, face redder than L has ever seen.
"Are you sure."
Matsuda nods again, then says, "I mean - yes, yes, I'm sure."
L leans forward, hands cupping Matsuda's face as he brings their lips together and Matsuda lets out a surprised, high pitched sound. The kiss is slow and short and shallow. Matsuda's lips are soft - so soft and L very much doesn't want to pull away.
Luckily for him, the minute he pulls away, Matsuda wraps his arms around L and pulls him in for another.
This one is much sloppier, but it's even better. He tastes like freshly made bread and coffee - it's the kind of taste that's only good because it's Matsuda.
When they pull apart, Matsuda is grinning giddily, and L can't help smiling himself.
Matsuda claps his hands over his face and sinks into the couch, "Ahhhh!"
"Was that enjoyable?" L asks, slowly moving himself back to his seat, this time situating himself slightly closer to Matsuda.
Face still hidden behind his hands, he nods. He slowly removes his hands and says, "Could we, um, do that again?"
L nods and reaches out to grab Matsuda's hands. He pulls them away from Matsuda's face and their fingers interlock. L leans in and kisses him, deep and slow. He pulls back momentarily, eliciting a sound out of Matsuda, then he presses another kiss into the corner of his mouth, then his jaw and he can feel Matsuda melting beneath him.
He relaxes under him as L peppers kisses against his neck.
"Ahh - ah - Ryuzaki," Matsuda lifts himself up a more proper sitting position and pulls L up with him.
"Sorry, did you not want that?"
"It's not that, it's just that this is going a bit fast. And - and I don't even know what we are or - or why you might want to..."
L tilts his head and retreats, sitting beside Matsuda, who pulls one of his hands backs and threads their fingers together. He smiles at him and L can't help but feel like he's melting.
"Why I might want to what?" he asks.
"Well," Matsuda shifts a bit uncomfortable under L's gaze, "why you would want to - I don't know... be with? Me?"
L frowns slightly. "To tell you the truth, I'm not sure myself. I'm not very good at this sort of thing, but I truly do like you, Matsuda. You're kind and you're interesting and you're one of the few people who manages to surprise me. You're talented and adorable and I just - I just like you, Matsuda."
As he spoke, he had to pull Matsuda's hand away from his face. He's so unbelievably flustered, it's so, so cute and it's all L can do to stop himself from leaning in for yet another kiss.
"You really think all that?" Matsuda asks.
L nods.
"Oh, well, I - well - I'm sorry, it's just - you're so smart and cool and I don't even have the words to describe you!"
L leans forward and makes direct, unwavering eye contact.
"Matsuda..."
"Ryuzaki..."
"Like I said I 'm not familiar with this aspect of life, but I do believe that the next step would be to ask you to be my boyfriend?"
Matsudas eyes widen. "Oh! Oh, yes, of course, if that's what you want!"
"That's what you want?"
Matsuda nods. "Yes, yes, of course!"
L nods. "I'm going to kiss you again, is that okay?"
"Absolutely."
They both lean in this time. It's another sloppy kiss, it's long and it's deep but strangely chaste. L has his eyes closed as he just enjoys the sensations.