Authors Note: This is a continuation of the alternate ending of Death Trap, meaning that Michael Jardine is still part of the team. Jackie is recovering from being shot by Kennedy.

In these times of madness with Coronavirus, I find myself feeling nostalgic for Taggart. My grammar is slightly improved from my last postings but it is still something I struggle with. I hope there are still people enjoying taggart fanfiction out there!

Disclaimer: As ever don't own any characters

The Recovery

Chapter 1: The Night Before

The past few months had been difficult for Jackie. Recovering from a gunshot wound was not something she was accustomed to, the pain was one thing but the constant flashbacks that was something else. Every time she closed her eyes she saw Kennedy and that look in his eyes as he pulled the trigger.

She often woke up in a cold sweat in the middle of the night, and at first Brian was supportive, he would pour her a drink and sit with her. That didn't last long, now he was short with her, he didn't understand why it still bothered her. He continues to work away a lot and when he was here, she would just sneak out of the room and pour herself a drink.

She had found it heartbreaking that just as her friendship with Michael had been in some ways reborn that her marriage had been deteriorating. She tried to talk to Brian about their relationship, but he didn't seem interested any more. She couldn't bring herself to tell Michael about it. She felt as though she had failed, that she hadn't gotten over the shooting as well as Brian had hoped.

She looked at her work clothes hanging on the door. She couldn't believe that she was to return to work the next day. She was torn, being stuck in the flat all day which was not for her but she couldn't shake the feeling that she wasn't ready to go back. Michael had been round all the time to check up on her, which she secretly enjoyed. Even Robbie and Stuart showed an interest in how she was; the only one who wasn't interested was her own husband.

Chapter 2: First Day back

The sound of his alarm woke her, she realised she was still on the couch and the whiskey glass was on the floor. "Did you sleep ?" he shouted from the bedroom. She picked up her glass and went to the kitchen. "A little, Do you want some coffee?" she put on the kettle.

"No, I won't have time. Got an early meeting!" it didn't take him long to get ready, he had it down to fine art. Jackie sat with some coffee, the nerves starting to get to her. "Things will be better now, now that you're going back to work. Things can go back to normal!" he said he gently grabbed her hand and brought up his lips and gently kissed it.

"You're probably right, do you fancy going out for dinner tonight?" she moved in to kiss him but he turned away. "Emm that would be nice! But won't the lads want to take you out to the pub? First day back and all '' she was disappointed, but at least she tried she thought to herself. He put on his suit jacket ready to go. She forced a smile " that's a point".

"I don't mind honey, have drinks with the lads and well do something special tomorrow night!"

"Have a nice day!" she kissed his mouth deep. The first passionate kiss they had shared in a long time, he brought his hand gently stroked her cheek as he kissed her.

Chapter 3: Back at the Office

Jackie was standing outside the building looking up at all the offices, she had been there for twenty minutes trying to her feet to move. She wasn't a nervous person before but the thought of being in a room full of people filled here with dread. She took a deep breath and summoned the courage to walk in.

Michael had walked into the office with a spring in his step and a smile across his face. Jackie is back today he thought. He slipped a chocolate bar on her desk with a post-it note saying 'welcome back'. He had missed her, missed her wit, her laugh, and realised just how much he relied on her.

Jackie had walked in behind him. She could see him slip chocolate on her desk and made her smile.

"Good morning!" He spun round to see her, excited to hear her voice.

He didn't even think about it, he just wrapped his arms around her. "Welcome back!" he beamed as she hugged him back. It felt good to have his arms around her. She broke off the hug and hung up her jacket. "Robbie and Stuart in yet ?" she asked.

"There out this morning, interviewing a witness to murder yesterday!"

"What's the case?" she asked.

"Well I was thinking that you should ease yourself in!" She sat at her desk switching on her computer.

"I'm back Michael, I don't need special treatment!" she said firmly she hated people walking on eggshells around her, no matter how much she may have needed them to.

"I know!" he said. "I'm glad to have you back Jackie!" She smiled. It was nice to feel like she belonged somewhere. "Let me get settled and we can go over the case!" she said logging into her computer. She was surprised that she had remembered her password; it had been several months since she had used it. It was nice being back and nothing had really changed, she would just go back to normal like nothing had thought.

The morning had been going by fast; she had a lot of emails clogging her inbox, case files that needed finished up, and notes needing writing. She knew that Michael had handled most of the unfinished work she had before she had come back. "Hello Stranger!" Robbie came up behind her and planted a kiss on her cheek. "Hello Robbie," she turned into a hug. She had missed Robbie and his humour. He was followed quickly by stuart. "Thank god your back, Robbie is doing my head in!" he exclaimed as she giggled, she hugged him too. "Right now all this hugging is out the way who is going to make me a cup of tea" she giggled.

Chapter 4: The Briefing

They had been chatting like old times. Jackie had felt so relaxed to be back in the company of her friends and her caring male colleagues. "Jackie you up to sitting through a Briefing" she nodded.

Just as everybody had gathered for the briefing Matthew Burke had entered the room. She knew that he had stayed for a few weeks after the Kennedy case but no one had mentioned that he had taken a permanent position.

Burke had started to talk about the latest cases. His voice, Jackie couldn't concentrate on what he was saying.

She kept hearing "Right come on Jackie, stay with me". She could see Burke holding her wound. She remembered the fear she had felt. Remembered that she had thought she was going to die. She thought that was it. She remembered just wanting it to be over. "Jackie"

"Jackie, Jackie" suddenly she realised that Michael was touching her arm and saying her name.

"Yeah" she said, realising that Stuart and Robbie had looks of concern on their faces.

"Are you ok?" Michael asked. The meeting had finished, Jackie hadn't known how long it had been.

"Yeah" she shook Michaels arm off. Which shook him, the first time he had realised that Jackie wasn't ok. Physically she was fine but something was still bothering her. That Matthew talking must have triggered something.

Jackie sat in Michael's office, Michael chatting away to her just trying to make Jackie feel comfortable. "Jackie you know I'm here if you want to talk!" he said trying to catch her eyes.

"Michael, it's just." Just as she was about to talk Val Patterson had knocked on the door. As she entered the room Jackie got up to leave. "Good afternoon Michael, actually it's Jackie I was looking for" she motioned for Jackie to stay. She closed the door. "How are you Jackie?" She extended her hand and Jackie shook it.

"Yeah I'm fine ma'am" Jackie smiled, she had always admired Patterson's career.

"It's good to see you back on your feet." Jackie smiled.

"It's great to have her back Val" Michael smiled at her, meaning every word. He was glad to have his partner back he thought. He remembered how he felt seeing her in the hospital.

"I think these boys need you keeping them on their toes" they laughed.

"Well I don't know about that. But they have been very good to me!" Jackie smiled.

"Right well I will leave you two to it. Again good to see you back at it!" Patterson turned to open the door. "You lot going to take Jackie out to the pub tonight?" she turned.

"Yes of course" Michael smiled as he sat back down at his seat."your welcome to join us!"

"Maybe some other time!" Patterson left the office closing the door behind her.

"That was nice of her." Jackie smiled. Micheal wasn't about to drop his earlier line of questioning.

"So Miss Reid, what happened in that briefing?"

"Nothing, Michael… listen I best get back to do some work. Stuart was saying something about files he needed to be reviewed in the archive. I'll get started going through them!" He sighed. He knew the shutters had come down.

Chapter 5: Jackie and Burke

Jackie had pulled some storage boxes of the archive files relating to the case. Stuart had told her which files he needed. She planked them down on the table as Matthew Burke had entered the room. He looked around checking that they would be alone. "Hello Jackie" She had recognised the voice straight away, a voice that haunted her. She smiled at him. "I hope you don't mind, if I join you for a while" he sat down on the musty wooden chair. "Erm... ok" she said hesitantly "Are you ok sir?"

"Yeah, I'm fine Jackie. It's good to see you back at work." He smiled.

"Yeah, it's good to be back" she said it had become a stock phrase that she felt obligated to say to everyone. "Jackie, Forgive me, if I am out of line here. But... well..." burke stuttered a side of him she hadn't seen before, total out of character. "I have been having flashbacks to Kennedy" Hearing his name pierced through her. She looked into Burke's eyes and saw vulnerability, but not only that but that he was uncomfortable with that vulnerability. She knew just looking at him he was genuine. She also knew that Michael would not have sent him. "I remember the bang that pierced through the air echoing, it all happened so fast. I remember the blood, your blood" he closed his eyes and shook his head. "I'm sorry".

"When you started talking in the briefing, it came back to me the words you said to me, when you tried to keep me here. I relived it." Jackie looked at him. Matthew thought to himself that he was glad he was talking to her and more importantly that she was talking back. "I never thanked you for saving my life sir!"

He scoffed "i was petrified, Jackie, i have lost people but not like that…" he paused. She stepped in "Well thankfully Sir for both of us I pulled through" she beamed a smile.

"It's Matt, by the way" he returned her smile. This could be the start of an important friendship. They continued to talk not about the incident but about trivial things. Burke had shared details about why he had taken a post in Glasgow and explained that he had needed a change in his life. She had shared with him why she had stayed in Glasgow for so long. A few hours had passed and she couldn't believe that talking had been so fluent so easy. Jackie stood up and smiled and took Burke's hand. She didn't say a word. She didn't need to. They had both come to an understanding, neither of them had tried to comfort each other and they had simply shared their experiences. They had both trusted each other and as such could move on.

Chapter 6 Home Time

It had been a long first day back, Michael and Robbie had begged her to go to the pub to celebrate, but she was so tired. She made her excuses and headed home.

The door was open when she returned, Brian must have bet her home for a change. She put her bag down in the hall and went to pour herself a drink. That's when she noticed an extra coat hanging on the hook. Odd! She thought as she drank her whiskey, she noticed two glasses of wine on the coffee table. "Oh brian" she hears a woman's voice say. Jackie stood in shock, surely it can't be what she is thinking. Then she heard him groan, a familiar sound he made when they made love, that he was close to finishing. She tipped toed to the bedroom door and looked in, her suspicions confirmed. She stepped back. She felt a wave of anger bubbled inside her but she couldn't face a confrontation so she placed her whisky glass on the coffee table next to the wine glasses, grabbed her bag and slammed the door on the way out.

Chapter 7 - The Morning After

The next morning, Brian was in the office looking for Jackie, he had tried calling her all night. "Michael, have you seen Jackie ?" Micheal looked puzzled.

"Not since yesterday, why?"

"She didn't come home," Brian looked concerned. Michaels stomach dropped.

"Have you tried calling her?" Michael pulled out his mobile and rang her. It went straight to the answer phone. "Hi Jackie, it's Michael here give me a call please". Micheal started to get really concerned, maybe they had pushed her too soon to come back. He knew she wasn't right.

"Morning Brian, Are you still in the dog house?" Robbie laughed. Brian looked sheepish.

"What do you mean?" Micheal asked.

"Well Jackie rocked up to my house late last night, looking for a place to crash " Robbie smirked. Enjoying Brian's discomfort. "Don't worry she didn't tell me what it was about" Brian looked worried.

"Where is she now?" Michael asked, hurt that Jackie had run to Robbie. "Is she ok?"

"She's downstairs with HR, she had a back to work meeting thing." she will be finished in about an hour. Micheal turned to Brian "Do you want to wait for her in my office, I don't want a domestics in here tho" Micheal knew it must be serious for Jackie to have walked out. "Yeah if i could please" Brian was humbled by his kindness.

It had been over an hour, Jackie should have finished with HR. Micheal had spent the hour watching the various expressions on Brian's face. He was deep in thought, Brian used to worship Jackie, but after she was shot he was barely there. Jackie wouldn't talk to him about it. Why would she run to Robbie ? Micheal phoned HR and they told him Jackie's meeting finished a half hour ago. He looked in the office but showed no sign of her. "Brian i'm just going to nip out for sec, HR said she should be finished soon" He lied.

"Thanks Michael" Micheal left the office and went to chat to Robbie.

"Robbie any word from her ?"

"Nope, what do you think is going on?"

"Well you would know!" Michale shot back, it just flew out of his mouth.

"Honestly Michael. She didn't tell me anything she just turned up saying she needed a place to stay. You know what she's like when she doesn't want to talk about something" He smiled. "Yeah you're right sorry!" He apologised.

Chapter 8 - The Roof

"There you are!" Micheal exclaimed. She was standing in his spot on the roof. He could see she had been crying as he came beside her. "Jackie are you ok ?"

"Maybe I came back too soon," she admitted. "I'm struggling a bit michael!" she nodded looking at him. He hugged her. "We will take this at any pace you want to!" She smiled and went back to looking at the view.

He took a deep breath, " Brian is downstairs" she blushed. " he seems pretty worried that you didn't come home last night" Micheal tried to gauge her expressions.

"Oh god, sorry Michael '' she said clearly embarrassed.

"Don't be, what's going on?, Robbie said you stayed at his" her hand went to her brow.

"I walked in on Brian with another woman last night" She hadn't said those words out loud.

"WHAT?!" Michael exclaimed, annoyed that he had been so nice to him. "He did what?"

"I guess i shouldnt be surprised, i mean we havent had sex in months" she looked away mortified to be having this coversation. "What did i expect!"

"Jackie you were recovering from a gunshot wound for christ sake" he could see she was only half listening. "You don't deserve that Jackie, you deserve someone who will be there for you no matter what" he said desperately trying to get her to look at him.

"Micheal , when i walked in on them, i felt angry for sure, but i …." she paused not sure if she could say the words out loud. Micheal nodded trying to encourage her. "I em… I was relieved" she blurted. "It's like he gave me an out, a reason to leave"

"I didn't know you felt that way" he grabbed hand. " Why did you run to Robbie?" She could see he was hurt that she had turned to Robbie.

"I didn't want you to think less of me" tears streamed down her face. He looked at her with a puzzled expression. "I failed" he couldn't help but smirk.

"Jackie, all i have ever wanted is you to be happy" and he meant it. "I nearly lost you, I can't be in this world without you! I am here for you in any capacity you want!" he stared into her eyes, hoping she would listen to his words.

"Jackie" Brian exclaimed. He walked over to them, as Michael stood back avoiding eye contact with Brian. He felt this flutter of anger in his stomach. Remember he's complaints and discipline he chanted to himself. "Brian maybe you should go!" He snapped.

"No Michael" she raised her hand "its ok, ...why don't you give us a minute…." He reluctantly walked to the door. "I'm just outside the door…" he glared at Brian

"Jackie, I'm sorry" Brian went to touch her. She stepped back.

"I'm sorry too. We made a mistake getting married, that is clear to me now!"

"No i made a mistake, it was just sex" he said.

"How long has it been going on?" She asked, trying to gauge his expressions. He look away ashamed of the answer. "6 months"

"So before i was shot" she didn't know if that was better or not.

"Jackie, we can give it another go" he grabbed both her hands. "Besides you went running to Robbie Ross, how do I know you didn't jump his bones."

"Seriously" she yelled. "I did not shag Robbie Ross, there is nothing between us! There never was!" Micheal could hear that part outside the door, he was relieved. He knew Robbie wouldn't have taken advantage of her, but if jackie had turned up his his door wanting sex, he didnt think he could resist so why would Robbie be any different. "Listen, I have tried to talk to you for months to talk to you about the strain in our marriage. But you were too busy fucking her," she paced infront of him. " I'm sorry I didn't take being shot as well as you wanted me to. I'm sorry I wasn't jumping your bones every day" The anger was welling up inside. "But for gods sake, i just saw you having sex with another woman in my bed" the gravity of what he did was finally dawning on him. "Were you with her, when i was in the hospital ?" she knew the answer from his face.

"Brian.." She looked at him. "We are over!" She went to walk away. "I am going home to pick up some things. We can discuss living arrangements and divorce in a couple of days" He nodded. He should have known she would still be fair to him even though he had done the unthinkable.

"I am sorry Jackie, I do love you"

"Goodbye Brian" She opened the door seeing Michael patiently waiting there for her.

Micheal was waiting for her, "can you take me home to pick up and some clothes?" He nodded. "You know I have spare room if you want to stay with me for a while"

"Are you sure?" She was grateful for him.

"I meant what I said, I'm here in any capacity you want!" she kissed his cheek.

"Thank you"