Spring had washed away all traces of frost and cold winds. All sorts of new life and green grass were the only things that the fields of Hyrule knew. It was the first day of April. Lake Kolomo sparked in the sun with clear waters, the Applean Forest boasted juicy, red fruits, Windvane Meadow's grass waved and bobbed in the gentle, breezy winds.
However, things were far from being tranquil on top of Whistling Hill by Hylia River…
Link sniggered quietly to himself as he carefully dumped the entire contents of a pouch into the opening of Zelda's left boot. She would never see it coming.
Link and princess Zelda had been making their way southeast toward Zora's domain, and they had decided to make camp that day out on Whistling Hill, just north of Proxim Bridge. That afternoon, Zelda had gone down to bathe in Hylia River. Little did she know, Link was putting fresh, live Restless Crickets in one of her boots, which she had unwittingly and unsuspectingly left behind.
Because there was no wearer in it, Zelda's knee-high boot naturally flopped to one side, containing every insect in the heel and toe chambers of her footwear. Link thought of it as the perfect set-up.
Just to add a little spice in the princess's life - actually quite literally, Link had taken her water canteen and added a pinch or two of Goron spice to it. Three pinches - you can never be too sure. Unlike her knight, Zelda couldn't stand any food with an ounce of heat, and her face always turned a bright red whenever she tried one of his curry dishes. Ensuring nothing would look suspicious when she returned from the river, Link leaned back against one of the hill's trees, took out his blade, and began sharpening it with his whetstone. Everything was in order.
Despite Link's usually calm and quiet personality, he had always been a master planner, and he had been known for a number of elaborate pranks and hoaxes on Hyrule's royal guards back when he was much younger. Though his recent royal duties prevented him from enjoying such mischievous indulgences, Zelda's friendship with him had reopened that nostalgic door.
Of course he meant no harm to his princess; it was all in good fun. After all, he was supposed to be her protector… Link doubted for a moment whether his plan was actually a good idea. She had only just warmed up to him in the past few weeks, and he didn't really want to test that. Then Link shook off his trepidation. Instead, he just decided not to overdo it... this time. She'll be fine. I'm sure nothing will come of it.
Link did not have to wait long before he spotted the princess trekking back up the mountain. Her soaked hair dripped over her fresh clothes, and she was humming to herself.
"Enjoy your bathe, princess?" Link maintained his typical nonchalant disposition; he obviously couldn't give anything away.
"The water was actually much warmer than I expected, thank you. I enjoyed it very well." Zelda hung her towel on the branches of a tree. "By the way, is it my night to prepare dinner?"
Though Link always preferred to cook their meals, he had taught the princess a number of basic recipes due to her insistent begging. Under his teaching, she wasn't half bad at it either. Her stew was even beginning to become one of Link's favorites. He welcomed the occasional break anyway.
"I believe so." The two companions spoke no more as they relaxed under the shade of Whispering Hill's trees. They weren't expected in Zora's Domain for a few days more, so they could afford the time. Link was at least finding ways to amuse himself.
To his annoyance however, Zelda sidestepped over her boots, opting for the feeling of the grass between her toes. Link's eyebrows raised imperceptibly. The game was on. The princess retrieved a notepad and charcoal stylus from one of her packs and propped herself up against a tree opposite to her knight.
As men talk about the very thing that they are in danger of losing, Link attempted to subtly direct Zelda toward falling for his set-ups. With his hand shielding his eyes, Link peered upward at the bright sun which was just beginning to sink from its zenith. He had a look of perfectly feigned contemplation on his face.
"You know," he began. "We should finish our waters and refill when we leave in the morning. It'll be a dry evening tonight."
"Really? How can you tell?" Zelda didn't look up from her sketching, but her voice registered curiosity. Link didn't have a real answer, but he suppressed the creepings of a mischievous grin.
"Just a trick I had picked up from Goron City." In complete truth, he wasn't lying about the origin of his "trick." Regarding his set up, Link had purchased a couple of jars of the spice from the Goron Gusto Shop back on Death Mountain for future curry recipes. But now it's serving a much more entertaining purpose.
Zelda continued her work, and Link absentmindedly drummed his fingers on his sword sheath. Zelda's charcoal stylus scratching over her parchment reminded him of the ticking of some clock, causing him to grow impatient. He drew in a breath and focused on something else.
"What is it you're sketching, princess?" The tip of her pink tongue could be seen sticking out the side of her mouth. Clearly she had quickly become absorbed in her work. Then she sighed and laid aside her stylus.
"Oh, just a quick drawing. Nothing really." She flipped her notepad over for Link to view it. "What do you think of this?" Link was slightly peeved. Though her sketch of a Hot-Footed Frog was excellently detailed, he couldn't tell if Zelda had forgotten his loathing of the slimy creatures.
"It's good," he nodded truthfully. Hate the real ones though. Bunch of hopping, slippery pieces of Korok sh-
"I'm glad you think so," Zelda cut into his thoughts as she smiled. "I've recently become more interested in their abilities, and I think it's worthwhile exploring their potential." Link cringed at this. He remembered all too well Zelda's zealous prompting back on Irch Plain last week. She had enthusiastically shoved one of the creatures in his face, excitedly blurting out how when ingested, Hot-Footed Frogs could augment certain Hylian abilities. Link would sacrifice his life and limbs for the princess, but that was going a bit far.
Returning back to his objective, Link guessed that the Restless Crickets in her boot would eventually find their way out. Perhaps this could be his golden opportunity to get back at the princess for nearly forcing him to swallow one of those frogs. Perfect. She still won't suspect a thing. And after all, a hero must allocate justice to all of Hyrule's people. Link stood up and bluffed a yawn and a stretch.
"I'm going to scout around."
"What for? We're still on Hyrule Field territory."
"Just to get things moving. Want to come with?"
"Sure!" She always did. Link internally grinned his triumph. Just as he knew she would, Zelda reached for her right boot first and slid it on without cause for alarm. Link turned as she reached for her left, trying to contain that internal grin and failing. Silence. Then her resulting shriek caused him to double over in laughter. The princess was desperately scrambling away from her boot from which a number of Restless Crickets were escaping. It took her only one look at her guffawing knight to fill in the blanks.
"LINK! How could you? I had no idea you were so - so malicious, and ill-intentioned! I-I can't believe your behavior!" Zelda's cheeks burned with anger, and her voice rose to a squeak with every stressed word, causing Link to only laugh harder. She stood there trembling, and Link gradually recovered the use of his respiratory systems.
"Alright, princess. First of all, that was payback," he wheezed.
"For what?" Her voice was high with indignation.
" For nearly stuffing a frog down my throat!"
"Link, that was last week! - I can't believe you!" She could only repeat this last phrase as she cautiously prodded her once-infested boot with her toe. "I'll have to thoroughly wash this now. You can go 'scouting' well enough on your own!" She reached for her water canteen, and Link felt a sudden wave of existential dread.
"Uh, you know what, Zelda? On second thought, maybe that's not such a good idea..." The princess glared at her knight, and unscrewed the flask. Instead of immediately beginning to wash her boot, Zelda first put the canteen to her lips in anger. After a moment, her face turned bright red, and she flung the bottle from her. In an attempt to cool her fiery tongue, Zelda opened her mouth and began deeply inhaling, her hand to her chest.
After she recovered from the initial shock of the spice, she swiftly turned to angrily lecture her guilty knight, but he was already sprinting down the length of Whispering Hill. His mischief had been a success, but at the very least, Link still valued his life.
Letting Zelda's anger simmer down was probably the best thing Link could do. His "scouting" mission took him so far as a small stretch of trees northwest of the Bottomless Swamp. The sun was dipping low over the horizon when he got back.
He smiled sheepishly as he held out a small bundle of Hyrule Herb, knowing that the princess was partial to them. Zelda glared at her appointed knight from her position over the cooking pot. The merriment in his eyes probably didn't help her mood. She only jabbed a finger in the direction of their packs, and Link took the message. Was the whole thing worth it? Yeah.
When the stew that had been simmering in the cooking pot was finished, Zelda passed Link a bowl of it, grumbling something about not being hungry. Link almost felt sorry for her. However, the pangs of hunger were overpowered by any pangs of regret, and he dug in. The stew was different this time. There were small chunks of meat whose taste resembled that of cucco, but Link couldn't be sure. Suddenly, a larger piece of seemingly wriggling meat slid down his throat, and he almost choked.
"Hey, Zelda? What's this meat in the stew?"
"Hot-Footed Frogs," came her calm reply. Link's eyes bugged out, his spoon still in midair. Now it was Zelda's turn to crack a deep smile and burst into complete, uncontrollable laughter. Link was still processing her reply.
"Wait. Hold on. What is this? ... Wait, uh, Zelda?" She only dropped to the ground and clutched her stomach in mirth. Link let out a shout and dropped his bowl as the blank expression of another Hot-Footed Frog peered at him from the depths of his stew. If it had been out of revenge or if Zelda had been planning this all along, Link knew not, but he did know that this time, it was he who'd finally been had.
That night, the new month brought a warm breeze to Hyrule Field, and Link was certainly not enjoying having to jog up and down Whispering Hill as Zelda stood a ways off, recording whatever effects the Hot-Footed Frog may have had on her subject. This was certainly not his idea of a spring night well spent. He could be there for hours.
Link could still hear her giggles as she continued to scribble on her notepad.
Happy April Fools' Day to you all! May your day be filled with pranks and laughs - hopefully on your part, anyway ;)
Cheers!