A/N- Yup... Yet another fmab/harry potter crossover. They're all pretty much the same, aren't they? Ed becomes either a teacher or student at Hogwarts, Harry and friends eventually find out about his past, it's usually set in the third or fifth book so Ed can encounter a boggart, you know the drill. I hope this one will be a little different, however. I also hope I'm able to keep everyone in character. I feel like that's one of my strengths, but please tell me if it seems like someone's acting weird.

Italics are for Amestrian, or any other language other than English.

Disclaimer: I do not own Fullmetal Alchemist or Harry Potter. If I did, I'd be rich, and that is most certainly something that I am not.

Chapter One

Hadn't he gone through enough hell?

Dammit, hadn't Al gone through enough hell?

Years of not being able to touch, eat, sleep, cry, even to simply feel the sun on his skin- didn't Al, at least, deserve a happy ending?

Didn't Al, at least, deserve to be happy?

But that fucking bastard Truth just fucking grinned at him and told him that yes, his alchemy would suffice, but he fucking wanted Ed to sacrifice something else.

Because apparently he fucking cared now about what happened to humanity.

Because apparently there was some other fucking world that needed saving and fuck.

He didn't want to go through any of that bullshit ever again.

He just wanted to get Al's body and fucking live peacefully for a while without all the military shit and the stress of maybe never being able to get their original bodies back.

And fuck, maybe it was selfish of him, but he didn't fucking want to get involved with some completely different world, even if that meant no one would be able to save it. It wasn't his fucking problem.

He didn't want to see people close to him die ever again.

He just wanted to fucking see Al smile. Was that too much to ask?

And maybe it was- maybe with what he'd done he didn't deserve to see Al smile- but he didn't fucking care.

If the Truth was so unfair and twisted as to take something away from a man who had fucking been forced to do human transmutation, then maybe it could fucking be unfair in someone's favor for once.

Maybe he was fucking tired of everyone just getting what they deserved no matter the circumstances.

Maybe the Truth could actually do something decent for once, and just fucking let them be.

And so yes, he was definitely turning down Truth's fucking offer, even if it meant he wouldn't be able to use alchemy again.

Al meant way more to him than alchemy.

And so, he uttered one word.

One simple word.

One word that he'd been longing to tell the fucking Truth since the moment it took everything from him and Al.

"No," He said. No, you cannot take anything else from us. No, you've fucking taken enough, I won't allow you to take anymore. No, I'm fucking done with your bullshit.

But he knew the moment he said it that it wouldn't be accepted.

The Truth's shit-eating grin disappeared, and somehow he knew that there was no getting out of this.

Because yes, the Truth could be unfair.

And yes, the Truth decided to fucking reject a toll that should have been enough simply because it apparently enjoyed fucking with the Elric's lives.

And so he had two choices. Bring Alphonse back by fucking helping save another world, or not get him back at all.

He took the only option he could- he had to bring Alphonse back, no matter the cost. Al deserved a happy ending. And maybe, if he succeeded in doing whatever bullshit the Truth wanted him to do, they could all have a happy ending. However long it took.

His Gate of Truth- that shouldn't even exist anymore, if Truth wasn't a fucking bastard- slowly opened, and he decided that he'd just have to go through hell again. For Alphonse. He would go through hell as many times as it took for Alphonse. It didn't mean he had to like it, but he would do it.

For Alphonse.

Harry would be arriving in about a week.

Sirius was quite looking forward to it.

Not that Ron, Hermione, and the rest of the Weasly's weren't great, but Harry obviously held a special place in his heart.

Something that he had not been looking forward to, or even expected, was a boy covered with blood to suddenly appear in his kitchen.

They had all just been finishing up lunch when a large... eye had just appeared from nowhere in the middle of the fucking floor.

He'd immediately jumped to his feet, along with everybody else, wand out.

Nothing happened for a few moments, and he had been just about to take a step towards the mysterious eye when dozens of small black hands burst up from the floor around the eye, and someone appeared.

It took a while for everything to register, but after a few moments the eye and hands disappeared and there was simply a teenage boy laying in the middle of the floor.

An injured teenage boy.

Blood covered his face, and he looked to have some kind of injury in the upper shoulder of his right arm that looked way skinnier than the rest of his body.

It didn't take long for Molly to snap to her senses.

She ordered the children to go to their rooms, then approached the boy.

Arthur had, of course, warned her against it, but her mother hen instinct took over and it was obvious what her mindset was. I don't care if he's evil or possibly a threat: an injured child is an injured child, and it's our duty to help him.

What happened next was a blur to Sirius.

They immediately tended to the boys wounds, which luckily weren't too severe.

He was covered with cuts and bruises, and it looked like... something had impaled the shoulder of his left arm. But that wasn't the most concerning part. There were bits of metal embedded in his right arm, and there was horrible scarring all the way around it, as if someone had cut it off and put it back on.

Sirius sat outside of the bedroom where Molly was currently tending to the boy, along with Arthur.

Healing was best left to Molly, though the two men made sure they were instantly ready to help should she need it.

Damn it.

That was the first thing that registered in Ed's mind.

Damn it.

He was lying in some bed, in some room, in some house, in some fucking world.

He didn't want to open his eyes.

He didn't want to open his eyes to reality.

The reality that he was not in Amestris, or Xing, or Drachma, or any country that he knew at all.

He was stranded in some completely different universe, with no way to currently get back home.

Truth had fucking stranded him here so he could complete some stupid fucking quest or some shit and finally, finally get his brother's body back.

The only plus side was...

Well, there wasn't really a plus side.

There hardly ever was with fucking Truth.

He didn't even know how time fucking worked between the two worlds. Was the time the same, and everyone was still waiting for him and Alphonse to return, or was the time here slower than in Amestris?

The theory that there might be other universes was one that had never really been given much attention by Ed.

Yeah, sure, he accepted that maybe there was, but it wasn't like it was ever going to affect him.

But now, of course, it fucking was affecting him.

He wondered if the universe just hated him.

Probably.

He hesitantly opened his eyes.

Standing over him was a foreign-looking woman- she looked Cretan, if anything, but the shape of her eyes and the tint of her hair suggested otherwise. Ed didn't really care at the moment, however.

All he cared about was that as soon as he had opened his eyes, she had started rambling in a foreign language.

Fuck.

Of course Truth hadn't granted him the knowledge of whatever language she was speaking, even though that was the fucking least it could have done.

She paused, looking at him expectantly.

He guessed that she had asked him a question.

"Fuck." he said in Amestrian, not expecting her to understand him. It was just to get across to her that he didn't understand whatever the hell she was speaking.

She frowned slightly and called out to someone outside of his room.

Two men came rushing in.

The woman said something to them, and one of them, he had black hair and a beard, and looked quite... scraggly, walked up to Edward.

He sat up, not wanting to have a conversation (if that was what they were about to have- Ed doubted that anyone here knew Amestrian) laying down.

The man said something that sounded like a question.

"Fuck?" Edward said in Amestrian.

The man shook his head.

Edward frowned. Figured that they wouldn't know Amestrian.

"Fuck?" He asked in Xingese. The man shook his head again.

Edward sighed. The Truth had granted him with the knowledge of pretty much every language in his world way back when the first committed human transmutation, but it didn't look as though that information would help him here.

Still, it wouldn't hurt to try.

"Fuck?" He asked in Cretan.

The man frowned and shook his head again.

Edward made a frustrated sound.

"Fuck it all to hell!" He said in Drachman. Drachman was the best for cursing. It not only had a fare larger range of curse words than Amestrian, but they sounded better too.

The man sighed and shook his head again.

He looked at the woman, confused.

They had a small conversation in whatever the fuck their language was- Ed decided to call it Fuckian- and then turned towards him once again.

"Molly," the woman said, pointing to herself.

Edward nodded. At least they could communicate names, he supposed.

The scraggly man pointed to himself as well. "Sirius," He said.

The other man, Edward had almost forgotten he was there, followed suit. "Arthur," he said.

Edward pointed to himself. "Edward," He said.

Well, at least the names didn't sound too foreign.

'Sirius' was a little weird, but he'd heard similar names to the other two in Amestris.

This was going to be one hell of a fucking time.

A/N- so, what did you think? Let me know in a review- feedback really motivates me. Updates should come fairly often, especially now that I only have online school, and an extra week of spring break.

Hope you enjoyed!