Disclaimer: I do not own The Flash or these characters. Just borrowing them for some free fun.
Life After You
Chapter One- Life as We Know it
He woke up, sped through his morning routine then sat down to stare at his email's inbox for five minutes. This had become part of his routine over the last six months. Every morning he checked for an email that wasn't there. Every morning he swore it was the last time.
That was a lie.
Barry clenched his jaw then closed the laptop down. He skipped breakfast as he did every morning now. Something about a lack of new emails soured his mouth and made his appetite nonexistent.
He 'walked' to work. Taking in the sights and sounds of the city in the morning. The work rush, school buses and vendors starting their day. He used to be able to see the beauty in days like this. Now all he saw was what they day lacked. Her. He didn't see anyone else, there was no one else. Pretty girls in short skirts were not her. He felt it in his bone marrow, if it wasn't Iris then it wouldn't be anyone else.
He sped through his day job, going through the motions because he had to. He tested DNA, foreign fibres and identified some tire tracks; all before lunch. His post lunch was more exciting, a raging fire and an attempted robbery which he neutralized with the same mechanical disposition. To Barry, this was just another day. Just Life. To anyone else looking in, they would wonder, what was wrong with him?
She blinked away the sleep but wished she hadn't. She pulled the cool comforter up over her head as if she could hide from her responsibilities. It hurt even as she popped in a French Vanilla into her Keurig. The worst part, she didn't even know she was hurting. She wore it like her favourite shirt. It was like breathing, part of fundamental make up.
She stopped by Jitters on her way to S.T.A.R labs to get some fuel for Harry and something sweet to appease Cisco. She was close to an anxiety-free morning when she felt his eyes boring into the back of her neck as she paid the cashier. Leaving her change as she was in such a rush to get away from him, she slammed into the man in front of her. He appeared out of nowhere and his arm was probably made out of metal she thought as she rubbed her forehead with her free hand.
She tried to mumble an apology and get out of dodge but she was too slow.
"You forgot this,' he said. Caitlin's lips flattened into a thin line as a response. She took the change and receipt silently hoping that would be the end of the exchange.
"I've seen you here a couple of mornings and I-" Caitlin panicked at his words. She dropped the coffee and scone and sprinted out of the café like she was being chased by a chainsaw wielding maniac. Hurrying down the streets she tried to remember how to breathe but her short breaths made her take even shorter breaths.
Her muscles seized up and lungs burned, forcing her to stop moving. She leaned on the side of a building until the wave of panic passed. The grim reality was, if that guy had any interest in living a normal life he would run away from her and not to her. She wasn't good. Men in her space either ended up dead or evil to the core. She needed to be alone, not just for her good but for the good of any man who wanted to be with her. This was her life now.
Cisco slammed the desk hard to get the attention of Barry and Caitlin. They exchanged quizzical looks before turning to their eccentric friend.
"Ok, sad one and sad two, I'm taking you two out tonight." Cisco said.
Barry pointed to his chest. "I think he means us,"
Caitlin looked up from the test tubes on the table and said, "So am I sad one or sad two?" Barry and Caitlin debated for a few moments before Cisco grew annoyed.
"Shut up, shut up. It doesn't matter who's sad one or two. The point is, you two have been moping about for weeks and I'm sick of it. So put on your best party dress and let's hit the road."
"I haven't been moping," Barry tried.
"Iris left you dude, it's been six months," Cisco shrugged, "Get over it already."
"She's just clearing her head." Barry said.
"It's even worse than I thought, he's delusional and in denial."
Caitlin hid a smirk behind her hand which made Cisco point his words at her.
"And you," he pointed to Caitlin. "You had the worst admirer in the history of anyone but Zoom is gone, shake it off…let's go."
If only to shut Cisco up, Barry and Caitlin rose from their stools and followed him out.
"Have we really been moping?" Barry whispered to Caitlin who shrugged.
Twenty minutes later Barry and Caitlin met Cisco in the pipeline.
"Ready," Caitlin announced though she only took off her lab coat and pulled her hair in a ponytail; which was a step up from Barry who did absolutely nothing to change his appearance.
Cisco ignored all their 'effort' and began to open a breech much to Barry's confusion.
"Ugh…dude?"
Cisco grinned. "The party is on Gypsy's earth. Let me tell ya, they know how to party over on Earth-19."
"You buried the lead there buddy," Barry said.
Cisco smirked knowingly, the breech was opened and he beckoned them in first.
Caitlin was hesitant, did she really want to spend her night on another out much less on another earth.
"Please don't change your mind on me," he pleaded but it didn't sway Caitlin's hesitance.
"Don't leave me alone with him," Barry said from over shoulder. That was something she could sympathize with. She stepped through the breech after giving Barry a sympathetic smile.
On the other side of the breech, there were strobing lights, women and men dancing in suspended cages and a foam machine that spat foam all over the dancing bodies on the dance floor. Barry was amused, Caitlin wanted to crawl in a hole.
"Took you long enough," they heard behind them. When they turned to look Gypsy was standing there in her usual black, tight get up-making Caitlin suddenly self-conscious in her pencil skirt and blouse.
Cisco crossed the few feet to her smiling, "traffic" he said before greeting her with a kiss. Both Barry and Caitlin looked away as it got gross really quick. Soon after they parted she fixed her eyes on Barry and Caitlin.
"Aww, you brought sad one and two." she said to Cisco with pursed lips.
Before they were able to react to the nickname, a woman wearing bunny ears shoved drinks into their hands, "this special one is for Barry," Cisco said. He produced a black flask from his pocket. Though skeptic, Barry took it from him.
"Come on, you need to meet my friend Klondike," Gypsy pulled Cisco away leaving Barry and Caitlin to fend for themselves.
Left alone in a different world Barry shrugged and knocked his flask against Caitlin's glass.
"Do you think Cisco is right?" Caitlin yelled, trying to be heard over the music.
"What?" Barry yelled back.
"What?" Caitlin responded.
"This is ridiculous," Barry said. He took Caitlin by the waist and sped them out the club and up the nearest rooftop.
Caitlin barely had time to hold on to her drunk before she realized she was outside and high up. The sky was glowing green, some kind of reaction that was unique to this world Caitlin guessed. It was beautiful, she forgot altogether what she was saying. She looked up for a moment, forgetting Barry was there.
"Couldn't hear myself think," Barry finally said. He went to the edge and sat at the railing, legs dangling over the open air. Caitlin followed, handing him her drink while she sat.
"This is much better," she said. She took back her drink and sighed into the night.
"Is that where we were?" She looked across the way to the big neon sign CLUB NASTY. She chuckled.
"So, Cisco thought the cure for our sadness was club nasty?" More laughter consumed her, Barry even joined her.
"Drastic times?" he said.
"Maybe he's right," she said.
"Why do you think we didn't notice?" he said.
"I guess I was so wrapped up in what I was feeling, going through I didn't notice you were going through the same." she said.
"Same here, I'm sorry if I haven't been there for you,"
She shook her head. "You literally have the world save to everyday, I can let this one go."
"What if I can't?" he said, meeting her eyes. He touched her arm comfortingly and squeezed gently.
"I'm okay Barry…" she choked up and she blamed him for opening that can on worms on a night they were supposed to be doing the opposite.
"It's okay, I'm here now." He ushered her head against his shoulder. She found some solace in the crook of his neck for a few moments. Taking steady deep breaths, the tears subsided.
"Thanks Barry," she said.
"How long you been holding that one in?"
"Quite a while," she said. "How are you?"
Barry shrugged, "Confused more than anything. When her mom passed, she said she needed some time to herself. She went down for the funeral and then she said she needed another week then it was a journalism course…I'm trying not to be a narcissist but it feels like she's running from me."
Caitlin listened and sipped her drink.
"And if she is…then what does that mean for us? Is there even an us?"
Caitlin listened, that's all she could do. She couldn't' offer relationship advise. She had the worst dating history in the world.
"What do you want? To go after her?" she tried.
Barry shook his head. "I've been chasing Iris my whole life. Maybe that's how I'm in this predicament right now." He clenched his jaw. "Maybe it's time I throw in the towel."
"To tough decisions," Caitlin said holding out her glass. She knew it was Cisco's cocktail making him say those crazy things. The day Barry stopped pining for Iris was the day the floor caved in from beneath her and the world ended. But she wanted him to feel supported in that moment and knocked her glass against his.
"So, what do you say?" Barry stood up and held out his hand for her to take. "Wanna go back inside and hit the dance floor."
Caitlin's face screwed. That sounded awful. It wasn't Barry's scene either.
"Or we could go see the sights on this earth, speedster style?" He held her by the waist and she wrapped her arms around his neck.
"Hold on," he smirked.