Summary: 12th on Crowen Playlist! I kinda cheated in here. What happens before the end? Crowen.
Notes: I know I'm feeding you guys with this fics, when what y'all want is a new Mine chapter, and guys, I want to get rid of that as much as you, but I can't write it right now, so you'll have to wait a lil longer, okay? Good things come for those who wait, or something like that! Enjoy!
Disclaimer: Grey's not mine and bla… Songs belong to Niall Horan and Taylor Swift.
When you feel your love's been taken
When you know there's something missing
In the dark, we're barely hanging on
Facing the ceiling, Cristina Yang had one thought on her mind: What the Fuck?! How could she let Owen escape her fingers like spilled blood? And to be with Emma?!
Stupid!
She was stupid!
Not Emma. Cristina.
Well, Emma too, with her stupid muffins and bakery abilities, just like Izzie. Except, she didn't have an inoperable tumor whatsoever.
Still, she was stupid. Moronic even.
And Owen stupidest for falling for that façade, that very likely would have his ginger babies, and give up on surgery for good.
Stupid!
And that's why Cristina Yang found herself on Meredith's couch, facing up the ceiling and nursing a glass of red wine.
Because she was stupid. Moronic even.
Not Meredith. Cristina.
Well, Meredith sometimes, too.
"So, how much longer you're gonna hog my couch and grieve on the ex-husband you lost for a pediatric surgeon?"
Cristina rolled her eyes and finished her glass before answering.
"Alex is a pediatric surgeon and you seem pretty fine with that."
"Well, Alex saved my daughter."
"After he screwed everything." Reminded the Asian.
It was time for Meredith to roll her eyes.
"Enough with that, Cristina!" Meredith came to the couch and took the empty glass from her person's hands. "You need to stop crashing out here like you have no home." Meredith pointed as she went into the open kitchen, put Cristina's previous glass away.
"I don't have one, you know, besides, what's the point of having a room in your person's house, if I can't use it when I see fit?" questioned Yang as she went back to her previous position, facing the ceiling of the dream house.
Meredith didn't respond.
I blew things out of proportion, now you're blue
Put you in jail for something you didn't do
I pinned your hands behind your back, oh
Thought I had reason to attack, but no
"I was going to say I wanted to try again, and you said 'I want a divorce.'"
Those words were stuck in Owen's head.
Her phrase was the proof that, as usual, he was wrong about everything when the matter was his wife. Ex-wife. He had a girlfriend now. He was happy. Right?
He had attacked her, not giving her the chance to defend herself from his cruel words, and him and him alone had withdrew them apart.
Owen had accused her of crimes she hasn't committed, had took their already fragile relationship in his hands, and threw it away. Dispensable, like a dead heart.
Hunt found himself at Joe's. Derek was supposed to meet him half an hour ago. As chief, he knew Derek hadn't a surgery to be stuck into, so it meant he had forgotten or stood him up.
Either way, it was rude.
"Hey, sorry I'm late." Owen heard coming from his side and accompanied as Derek sat on a stool at his right. "Oh God, I miss Lexie." He blurted and asked Joe for a Scotch.
"What?" Owen asked confused arching his almost not-there eyebrow.
Derek took a sip from his drink before providing an answer.
"The kids, well, Zola only at that time, but the kids always had a relative to help with them… anyway, April offered to watch Bailey for an hour so, yeah spill." The brunette spoke gesticulating with his hands in direction of his friend.
"You could've canceled." Owen also took a sip from his drink.
"No, I needed this." He gesticulated to his whiskey.
Owen blurted a laugh. "Meredith's making you crazy?"
"Twisted sisters."
That caught Owen's attention.
Derek elaborated. "Now she's single, they're having sleepover in my bed with me in it, again."
This time, Owen did laugh.
"You think it's funny?" Derek asked, he himself holding back a smile.
"Actually, yes." The redhead confessed and asked Joe for another round.
"That's because she's not your wife anymore." Shepard responded and watched as his friend's face became stormy. "I'll come home in a few hours and you know what I'll find?" Derek offered.
Owen only gave him an almost imperceptible nod.
"Cristina, on my couch, drunk. Covers over her, because Meredith put them there, Zola's book over her lap, because Zola asked her to read her her favorite book…"
"Hello Moon" Owen recalled reading this same book to Zola couple times himself.
"Exactly." Derek pointed a finger to him, signalizing he was right.
"She lives with Karev now, why does she need to sleep in your couch?" Owen wanted to know.
"Well, she is lonely, even though she doesn't admit it, also she likes to drink my wine." The both of them laughed at that. "And, as a committed man, you shouldn't be asking for info on your ex-wife, right? Because you're with Emma."
The trauma surgeon drank his brew in one move.
"Because she's my ex-wife. And, I'm with Emma now."
Then you rest your head upon my chest
And you feel like there ain't nothing left
I'm afraid that what we had is gone
Fighting with a true love is boxing with no gloves
Chemistry 'til it blows up, 'til there's no us
Why'd I have to break what I love so much?
It's on your face, and I'm to blame, I need to say
Derek was wrong, because when he arrived home, Cristina was actually heading out.
"Give Zozo a kiss." The Asian said as she acknowledged him and, out she went, to call a cab in her words. And, with a very expensive bottle of red in hand, she thought she was scrounging under his nose.
"So, she's not sleeping over?" the man asked as he closed the door behind him.
"Nope." Meredith answered smirking at him.
"That actually means we have our bed to ourselves tonight?" he tried for a response as he got closer to his wife with a knowing smile. So McDreamy. Sparkling eyes and all.
Meredith only nodded and circulated her hands around her husband's neck, stealing a kiss.
That, Derek didn't mind being stole from.
Hey, it's all me, in my head
I'm the one who burned us down
But it's not what I meant
Sorry that I hurt you
I don't wanna do, I don't wanna do this to you (Ooh)
I don't wanna lose, I don't wanna lose this with you (Ooh)
I need to say, hey, it's all me, just don't go
Meet me in the afterglow
Cristina, really should not be here.
She. Should. Not.
But damn, the wine was strong. And she was feeling like celebrating.
On that case, providing other people brew to celebrate.
On that specific case. Owen and Emma. Moving in together.
Imagine the scene: if Owen found out that she hasn't sold the firehouse as yet and asked for it? She laughed with her own silly drunken thoughts, and concluded the three steps 'till she reached the trailer's door.
After a knock or two, she watched Owen opening the door.
Okay, so, what was the line she'd been rehearsing since closing Meredith's front door, again?
One moment Cristina Yang was on Owen's doorstep, then she was in his couch. His tiny, barely-there couch, minutes after that and almost half a bottle of very expensive wine, she was in his bed.
Seeing rivers of stars. Feeling her skin tingle with his stubble touching everywhere. His kiss on her mouth. His cock inside of her. His grunts of pleasure loud and clear in her ears. His thrusts getting moans out of her lips, his hands pressuring her body just where she wanted…
It was bliss.
It was the greatest sex ever. No, the most amazing love making of all.
Erotic novels did nothing in deceive those fools. Taste this Army soldier was like survive a war altogether.
Maybe still loving him senseless helped too.
And the afterglow…
Then I think of the start
And it echoes a spark
And I remember the magic electricity
Then I look in my heart
There's a light in the dark
Still a flicker of hope that you first gave to me
That I wanna keep
Please don't leave
Please don't leave
The sparkle, screaming to be reignited after such fire, it was the most awesome sensation.
Her head on his shoulder, his red-chewed lips on her curls, his arms around her body. Cristina missed that like she missed operating. It was a form of ignite the force of nature she was. It felt like breathing again, after a long time struggling to do just that.
When you lay there and you're sleeping
Hear the patterns of your breathing
And I tell you things you've never heard before
Asking questions to the ceiling
Never knowing what you're thinking
I'm afraid that what we had is gone
It's so excruciating to see you low
Just wanna lift you up and not let you go
This ultraviolet morning light below
Tells me this love is worth the fight, oh
When Owen woke up, his first action was smile.
She was still there, in arms reach.
He honestly thought that, as soon they were done last night, she would be guilty on her way out. He was never gladder to be wrong.
Her breathing warmed his chest where it reached. Her hair tickles his arm' skin in a delicious way.
The reality hit him as the sun passed through the curtains.
Emma.
He was feeling like shit for that. But the sentiment of having the love of his life in his arms suppressed all of that.
"Hey…" he heard a morning voice rising beside him.
"Hey…" he responded kissing her in the process.
Cristina smiled in satisfaction and kissed him back.
"So…"
"Just for one moment, stop thinking." She pleaded, putting one finger in his mouth to shut him up.
He nodded and kissed said finger, claiming her mouth in the process.
And I want this to pass
And I hope this won't last
Last too long
Things were fairytale-like inside that trailer. But life had to happen.
The rational part of her was ashamed of being the other woman, because she knew how it hurt being on the other side of the coin.
However, being with him felt like coming home. So, it couldn't be wrong, right?
I lived like an island, punished you with silence
Went off like sirens, just crying
Why'd I have to break what I love so much?
It's on your face, don't walk away, I need to say
He wished she hasn't walked away.
He wished that being with her wasn't like coming home from war, because it'd be much easier when she, eventually, let him go.
Meredith had said to him that she accepted the free trip to Switzerland, and that she'd be back in two days.
She punished him with silence. She had forgotten about him, about them.
In his wishful thinking, Owen was a warrior. A honorable one, not broken and bruised from the invisible wounds war provided. In that dream, he came home whole for her and nothing wrong had ever happened. They were still a family, just the both of them.
In this foolish head of his, she was never offered a job she couldn't refuse. A job that would take her away from him.
Maybe it wasn't Preston Burke playing his moppet strings to take her away from him. Maybe Owen was the one to blame. Would she go away if they were still married?
He would never know.
Tell me that you're still mine
Tell me that we'll be just fine
Even when I lose my mind
I need to say
Tell me that it's not my fault
Tell me that I'm all you want
Even when I break your heart
I need to say
The words were all there. In a board displaying letter by letter he needed to use to ask her to stay. Instead, he asked her to be with him 'till the time came.
For days on end, he opened his mouth to say. To beg. He needed to let her know what he felt inside.
Owen needed to be reassured that it wasn't him to blame for their doom. He did what he could to try, between the lines, to ask her to reconsider, in the end, Hunt gave up. Because, even though his heart was screaming inside his chest for him to say the words out loud, he was better than that.
Or so, the man liked to think, he loved her to the point of letting her go.
He loved her enough to aloow that.
Because that was what true love was, right?
You learned this at a young age.
Let it go. It it's yours…
Bullshit.
Letting her go hurt like nothing ever did, or would, for that matter.
Cristina had two options.
Love him, or leave him there.
The look on her face when she tapped on the OR gallery's glass, said witch one she picked.
His blue eyes said she was leaving with his heart on her pocket.
Could he live without one?
Because she was the only one capable of fixing it. And, she was going away.
The ghost of a smile she wore said she was sorry.
Through his cerulean eyes his soul pleaded…
Please don't leave
Please don't leave
End Notes: The pan was: make ONE fic with ONE song each. But, in the Playlist (Crowen – Cristina Yang and Owen Hunt), that you should check out on Spotify, these songs are just above/below the other, so I had this idea, and I think it worked prettu well. Lemme know whatcha think! See ya xx