My Sweet Nothing
Kyo's breath curled into the air like a soft mist, fogging up the stars that twinkled high above. There was no moon tonight, so they were the only things providing enough light to fight the reigning darkness.
He reached a hand up to the sky, spreading his fingers wide and blocking them from sight completely. Would he still be able to see them next year? When the dark became his only company, would they find a way to shine even then?
Kyo flexed his fingers, letting the light sparkle through before covering them again. He blinked hard as he heard his name echo around him, distant and dreamlike as if floating down from the heavens themselves.
He would have paid it no mind, but there was an undercurrent of familiarity there too – something in the voice that drew him back to reality, reminding him that he was currently stretched out on the roof of Shigure's home and not locked up in some windowless room for eternity.
There was a scrabbling sound to his right and his head shot to the side, eyes narrowing to get a better look as a dark figure struggled to pull themselves up onto the roof. No one ever came up here he thought with surprise before remembering that someone had called his name.
Who was looking for him?
Shigure, the lazy bastard that he was, would never put in the effort required to make the trip up here. And that rat tried to stay away from Kyo's haunts unless he absolutely couldn't avoid it, which only left …
"Tohru, is that you?" he called, pushing himself into a sitting position just in time to watch as the figure tripped on a loose tile and came crashing down with a shriek. Instinctively, Kyo rolled closer to the edge of the roof. He let out a loud 'oof' as whoever had climbed up crashed into him, his body cushioning their fall.
If he had any doubts about who'd climbed up here to find him, they vanished as soon as he felt the familiar feeling of shrinking overtake him.
God damn it Tohru, not again.
"Oh no. I did it again, didn't I? I'm so sorry," Tohru squeaked in alarm, her soft voice echoing in the warm darkness that suddenly surrounded him, encompassing him in the smell of jasmine and fresh laundry. He squirmed in an attempt to escape and she rolled off of him. "That was so clumsy of me, please forgive me Kyo-kun!"
Kyo didn't respond, his mind was preoccupied with a more pressing thought. Who knew how long this stupid transformation would last this time, and when he turned back then …
His clothes!
Panic settled into his tiny cat bones as he scrabbled around to find them. God, he hoped she hadn't knocked those off the roof. He spotted the red of his shirt peeking out from under Tohru's knees and was suddenly thankful that the cat had better night vision than he did in his human form.
"Jeez, will you get off my clothes?" he yelled, trying helplessly to tug his clothes out from under the girl. But he couldn't get a good grip with his paws and he briefly wondered whether having clothes with claw marks was worse than having no clothes at all.
"Oh, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" Tohru said quickly, hopping up onto her feet to let him snatch the clothes back. He felt the panic subside and took a calming breath that didn't quite work as he supposed it was intended to.
"Quit apologising will you, it was an accident. What the heck are you doing up here anyway?" he said, the irritation in his voice evident as he felt the humiliation of transforming in front of her again creep up on him, replacing whatever was left of the panic from before.
"I was looking for you Kyo-kun."
And just like that, as if the embarrassment her words brought on was too much for his tiny cat body to handle, Kyo was himself again. Himself and … completely exposed. Tohru's eyes locked onto his in the dim darkness and he could have sworn the blush on her cheeks lit up the roof like a lantern.
Kyo stared back at her helplessly, completely under her spell and unable to do or say anything as she stared at him. His cheeks burned and with a little noise of surprise, Tohru seemed to realise that he was sans clothing. She turned away from him with an apologetic shriek, but not before snapping her eyes shut and breaking her hold on him.
"Hey, don't spin with your eyes shut like that you klutz. You're gonna fall again," Kyo cautioned in a grumble, keeping one eye on the girl beside him as he tugged on his trousers as quickly as he could. Tohru seemed to consider his words, hovering in hesitation before letting herself drop into a sitting position.
Kyo let out a sigh of relief.
"Um … Kyo-kun? Did I hurt you?" she asked, settling onto the tiles beside him; her eyes still shut tight as she waited for him to dress.
"Course not," he muttered, rubbing his chest at the spot where her elbow had dug in uncomfortably. He was glad that she still had her eyes shut and couldn't see through his lie.
Kyo caught sight of her outline in the dark and frowned. Was she … shaking? With a sigh, he grabbed his jacket and threw it at her before pulling his shirt over his head.
"Huh, what-?!" Tohru said as the fabric of the jacket fell over her head.
"Put that on," Kyo cut in sternly. "You're clearly cold. Who goes out on a night like this without something to keep them warm? Are you an idiot or something?" Kyo yelled instinctively, gritting his teeth at his own inability to suppress his anger.
"Oh, thank you."
The complete lack of venom in Tohru's response felt like a bucket of ice-cold water had been poured over Kyo's head and all his anger seeped out of him.
Why did he always have to lose his temper … and at her too?
He watched Tohru struggle to figure out which way to put on the jacket in her hands and a small smile forced its way onto his face. "You can open your eyes now," he said, rolling his own at her incompetence.
"Oh," she said, finally getting the jacket the right way up and slipping into it with ease. It was much too big for her, but Kyo found he liked the way it looked on her. Like it was meant for her.
"Thank you Kyo, this is so comfortable. I feel so much warmer already," she said brightly.
"You'll feel warmer if you zip it up, you dummy. Here."
He dropped onto his knees beside the girl, reaching forwards to catch hold of the zipper. He could feel her eyes on him as he worked, and it was all he could do to avoid them as he pulled it up to the collar.
It was a cold night so she'd need to retain as much heat as she could or risk getting sick. He didn't like the idea of that one bit. If she had hurt herself then …
"Are you okay? You did fall after all, and I'm not exactly the softest thing to fall on," he asked her after a pause, voice softer. Almost kind.
"Of course," Tohru said, pulling her knees into her chest. "But … what are you doing up here Kyo-kun?"
"Nothing," Kyo replied, knowing he spoke too quickly for it to be the truth. But he could never tell her the truth, so what did it matter.
"Alone?" she asked quietly, a sadness he like settling into her voice.
"Yeah, alone. Just the way I like it," he snapped, needing to change the topic as soon as he could. "Why do you even care? I'm nothing to you Tohru. Nothing special, and definitely nothing good."
There was a beat of silence. And then.
"I agree Kyo-kun," Tohru said earnestly. "You are nothing."
"Huh?" Kyo's eyes snapped back to her, making her out a little better now that his eyes had adjusted to the dark again. She was smiling up at him in that ditzy way of hers and something clenched tight in his chest.
If anything, he'd expected some resistance from her. And if he was being truly honest, then some part of him wanted her to contradict him. To find something worthy in him.
But to agree with him?
Kyo grit his teeth in annoyance as he realised that the damned rat would be having a field day right about now. But something wasn't right. This wasn't like Tohru and he narrowed his eyes in suspicion.
"What's that supposed to mean?" he growled as he leaned towards her; the words coming off more curious than angry.
"You're a sweet nothing, silly," she clarified brightly, flicking his nose playfully in the way he oftentimes did to her. The action caught him off caught and he stumbled backwards, not realising how close he'd gotten to her.
He blinked hard at her unfaltering smile.
Then blinked again.
"W-w-what!?" he spluttered.
"You're a sweet nothing," she repeated, completely oblivious to his reaction.
"It makes even less sense when you say it again…" he deadpanned as a bubbly laugh escaped the girl before him. Was she being serious right now?
Kyo cocked his head to side as he scooted closer to her. Reaching forwards, he pressed a hand to her forehead – it was cool to the touch.
"You're not running a fever, so why are you spouting nonsense with that stupid grin on your face?" he grumbled, more to himself than to Tohru. "How am I a sweet nothing anyway …"
"Oh, that's easy Kyo-kun. Your actions are always sweet and caring, even when you get nothing out of them. Like the time you made me soup when I was sick. That's why you're my sweet nothing."
Kyo frowned, a bashful blush threatening to send his cheeks up in flames as red as his hair. "I um … I don't … I don't think that means what you think it means Tohru," he said, suppressing the urge to laugh at her ridiculousness. Even still, he couldn't help the grin that settled on his face, matching hers in its intensity.
"Oh?" she said, blinking up at him innocently. "Well, what else could it mean?"
"Nothing," he said. "It doesn't matter anyway, so don't bother looking it up."
"Well … if it doesn't mean that, then we should change the meaning because you fit it perfectly!" she announced with a quiet determination. Kyo chuckled under his breath.
"Whatever you say Tohru," he said, chucking her under the chin gently before a thought occurred to him. "Hey, why did you come up here anyway?"
"Oh, I almost forgot," Tohru said excitedly, clasping her hands together in front of her.
"You did forget," Kyo stated, rubbing the back of his head but she ignored his comment completely, rushing to tell him her news.
"Master-san called to speak with you earlier, but we couldn't find you anywhere. He said he's back from travelling and is at the Dojo, so you should call him when you get the chance."
"Huh. You're serious? Master's back and he called here to talk to me?" he asked, a welcome warmth spreading through his chest.
Tohru nodded happily.
"How did you forget to mention that sooner?!" he shouted in alarm, rushing to stand up. The last thing he wanted was for Master to stand by the phone for hours on end, waiting for him to call. How ungrateful could he be making him wait like that?
"Uh…" Tohru said, a nervous laughter escaping her lips as she stood up too. It took Kyo too long to realise she was misinterpreting his excitement and was starting to blame herself for forgetting. Typical he thought with a shake of his head.
She looked as if she was about to apologise to him again, but when she took a step forward her foot slipped, and it took all Kyo had to keep her upright without embracing her and facing the same problem as earlier.
"Be careful, will you," he chided.
"But Kyo-kun, Master-"
"Never mind that, it's an easy mistake. But you are an idiot, aren't you? Is tripping over some special power of yours or something?" he said with a helpless grin.
She smiled back tentatively, as if not quite sure what to make of him before giving in, the grin breaking over her face in a burst of unbridled happiness. "You're so silly Kyo-kun."
"Whatever. Let's go, before it gets even colder out here," he said, heading to the edge of the roof.
"Wait. Kyo-kun, your jacket!" Tohru said, starting to shrug out of it to return it.
"What – oh." He stopped her with a hand to the shoulder. "Keep it, it's yours," he said, trying and failing at nonchalance. "Besides, it looks better on you anyway."
He turned to the edge again to hide his face but before he could jump, he felt Tohru grab at the back of his shirt, her fingers clenching the fabric tightly. He glanced back over his shoulder in confusion.
"Huh, what-?"
Tohru laughed nervously and Kyo resisted the urge to facepalm as he realised what the problem was. He looked at the girl before him and shook his head helplessly.
"Hold on tight," he said, before sweeping her off her feet and jumping into the dark nothingness below. What kind of an idiot climbed on to a roof without a way down? Kyo knew the answer to that question before his feet hit the ground.
The kind of idiot he was hopelessly in love with.