XD I have no idea how this came to my mind. I just think had a talk with Sindel (read her fiction, it's awesome) and I couldn't help but write this.
Chun Li opened a gift, this time by her Mom...Her mother was such a clueless and snobbish Hong-Kongese to the core. Just like her to send a waxing kit with a heater, a spatule and some pincers to take care of nasty hairs. Her mother had no idea when she had married. In fact, Chun Li had only appeared faintly on news channels with a couple of Middle-Eastern, Korean, Chinese and a few other poor people who seemed vaguely conscious.
Perhaps it was the solemnity and the luxury of the wedding that had made her mother rethink her relationship with her. Either way, the woman had sent her a waxing kit as a wedding kit and Chun Li had no idea what to do with that. Her mother had turned from "I want nothing to do with that tomboyish and disappointing girl" to a "I am so happy you had your fairytale wedding! You look so beautiful in that white dress".
Chun Li thought she was momentarily relieved her family had been protected by Guile and other Interpol friends. It was something so horrible that her own wedding was compared to that of Royalty. One of the shows ' hostesses even compared her to one of the Royal Thai family queen weddings. First of all, the woman was an ungrateful and spoilt bitch, daughter of a Justice minister who couldn't find the amount of criminals and sex traffickers who offered part of their profits for him to keep quiet.
If Chun Li hadn't agreed to the dictator's whims, all of Asia would suffer with a more lethal version of atomic cruise missiles. The former police officer winced as she recalled the very "tv show game host" manner Bison had had announced it. First of all - the f***** setup. He had lured her into one of those sketchy, radio studios a lot of Muslim fanatic Thai audience used to watch. Even though she - and the rest of her Interpol comrades who had come with her on the mission - had thought the radio host was a Pakistani dude, once she had gotten there with six police officers, it turned out that it was M. Bison all along. He had declared that either she'd be drugged and brought to a heavily secured basement, screaming in terror as the biological weapon would be thrown thousands of feet above ground, or she'd marry him in a public wedding.
An enormous beach pavilion temple, thousands of white, red and gold satchels. Two very terrified crews of clearly bribed TV channels, one from an Asian country, while the other a western American one...Was it Fox News? Chun Li couldn't remember. The other three were from Russia, North Korea and Syria. The Syrian TV reporter kept crying like she was freaking Marie Magdalene, staining her dark formal hijab, muttering words that made the Arab-speaking guests snort. To western people, it was almost like she was the "other woman". She had nearly lost her voice from screaming obscenities that had made National US TV censor that strange program.
One of the most illustrious guests, a Syrian politician, had spent the entire entree of the wedding dinner reciting poems in Arabic, then in French. A North-Korean guy was almost choked to death by Bison because he had made a butt joke in Chinese. A Russian oligarch fell to the ground unconscious because he had made another sexist joke about Chun Li's breasts.
Great fairytale wedding I had, Mom... That almost looked like one of those B-comedy Chinese movies.
Turning off the small TV airing a Thai reality show starring celebrity dads taking care of their children for two days without the mommies' help, Chun Li snorted, a small giggle echoing. Sure, as though that monster would ever help her with rearing his offspring. He was a primitive and dominating sexist.
Curious how that damnable machine would work, she began to read the instruction manual. It wouldn't hurt to try, would it? Besides, she had experienced a world of pain. It was not as though torturing oneself with these could hurt.
Or it could...Maybe the scorching hot wax would make her wish that disgusting rod was still within her vagina. No! Chun Li shook her head as she opened the box.
"Pampering lotus and summer fig wax - experience a SPA waxing at your own home. I'll be the judge of that. All these years using nair and shaving blades and my mom still thinks I can switch to wax. Yeah...right. Good thing we're in a hotel with AC right now." Chun Li muttered while flipping the page. "Place the appropriate number of wax discs for the area of the body you wish to depilate. Plug in the pot - the warmer will begin to melt the discs. The wax is ready to use when it achieves a smooth consistency - in approximately 30 minutes (for four discs)."
Smooth consistency...?! Maybe they mean something really soft and without bubbles.
Then, Chun Li noticed something awful - the plug was European. Groaning, she wondered if she could sneak a tiny adapter into the hotel room. She had seen plenty of tourists buying adapters for three dollars.
She recalled something also very vital - she hadn't put body moisturizer yesterday, mostly because a certain horny old fart wanted to have a second sex session.
That could affect the waxing. Wincing, she remembered faintly of a time she hadn't put a body lotion after showering when she was still in the police academy. There were dozens of cuts in her left leg after that day.
"Playing the mad doctor, are we, Detective?" A booming, deep voice almost made her slip two discs into the warmer pot. Thanking every god in existence she had no idea how to find an adapter for the plug, she sighed in annoyance.
"Stop..." A faint hiss echoed from her. "I was...just...Why do I even need to explain myself to you?! You're the one who threatened entire countries...!"
"I was just curious - how on earth did your mother manage to find our hotel?" The tone of the dictator's voice was now serious, as the piercing eyes fixed on her. "I wouldn't want my mother-in-law to have an accident."
Chun Li shivered slightly, imagining the poor woman screaming, being dragged to a van.
"Trust me...I don't want to meet my mom either! I think she just bribed one of the local TV channels and tried to weasel the information out."
"So...being nosy doesn't just run on your father's side..."
Suddenly, the former police officer scooted from the bed, a furious red on her cheeks.
"Don't you dare talk about my father again! No! You-! Of all people-!"
Suddenly, the towering and buff psychopath stood up, his voice taunting:
"You what, Chun Li Xiang?! Let's just forget your sweet little Mother exists..." In a blink of an eye, he turned the eerie gaze to the wax. "On second thought..."
The trademark sadistic grin returned to his face.
"You know something, darling? I think I'd thank your Mummy for this little gift. So... we'll return to Mriganka in two, three hours - in the meantime, I want you to have these prepared for your hairy little thighs!" He slapped one large hand onto her right leg. "And I want to watch..."
One hour later, Chun Li found herself in a deserted part of the International Bangkok Airport, legs clammy from both the sweltering heat and the rich cream worth hundreds of dollars her husband had "so generously" placed and massaged onto her skin. She almost felt like she was in kindergarten and was confined to a corner.
On the other hand...The fighter thought with a blush...It would turn her on to watch that man scold her...No! She didn't want to give that perverted man any ideas!
"Who gets pleasure from seeing his own wife waxing?" She mumbled to herself, feeling like there would be Shadaloo snipers disguised as tourists watching her.