A tired Bojack calls his ex-girlfriend, Wanda in the middle of the night. Takes place a few months from Bojack finishing his time in jail.
"Hey."
"Bojack?"
He flinched--just a little. Her voice was so familiar yet he felt so uninvited by it. There was so much hesitation just from her saying his name like it was something she couldn't bare to spit out.
Breathing. That was all he could hear on the other line as she awaited a reply.
Hey, he wanted to repeat. Or like, say some reference. "You kinda sound like Lisa Kudrow." Then she'd go "Who?", then he'd laugh hysterically, because then he'd have a reason to laugh--but who is he kidding, she probably already watched Friends on her 30 day free trial on Netflix before they took Friends out of their variety of sitcoms.
"Wanda." He said, forming a small smile on his face, even though she couldn't see him. "Never changed your number over the past five years we broke up, huh?"
He could almost hear her nervousness through the speaker of his phone, feel it even. The awkward chuckle was an immediate dead giveaway of their situation.
Course, not something Bojack Horseman could handle.
He opened his mouth to speak, a quick exhale from out of his nose to release some stress. He couldn't handle this--he knew he couldn't handle this. He was coward Bojack Horseman who'd be quick to stop this conversation if he wasn't so tired, and if he wasn't on a whim to rebuild relationships that were burning or were already extinguished by the prolonged amount of time that he wasn't in touch with it.
And Wanda was one of the first steps. The only one he could think to face, and who might forgive him.
"Heard you've been in jail back there in L.A.?" She suddenly shifted her tone to something that sounded more comfortable. Almost like she was talking to an old friend.
He chuckled, smile becoming more sincere. "It definitely wasn't ideal. Neither is staying here with Mr. Peanutbutter, but hey."
He could hear her laughing like she did when he told her jokes he used to say back when he was actually funny. "Mr. Peanutbutter?"
"I told you, not ideal. But it's all I've got at the moment." She was laughing again.
"You got sued by the Xerox company right?"
He put a hand to his face, placing down the half empty bottle of wine he's been drinking out from. "Yeah. But time flies here in Holywoob- I don't think anyone remembers what I've done." He sighs. "Which makes me feel kinda worse."
He got up from the tall chair and placed the wine back in the fridge, walking out of the kitchen to sit on the couch. His foot steps echoed each step he took, Wanda could probably hear it from the other line. "Well, that's life for you there. Things here in Detroit are a bit slower though, I'm kind of glad but at the same time it's something to get used to. And I've been here for a few years now so that's saying something."
He was flipping through the channels, still listening intently to what she was saying. He was never a good listener, but he could try.
"I just think it's a little less exciting here. Back in Holywoo," Holywoob, he nearly corrected. "I had something to do, my sister lives there. And people people care about are more accessible. But here it's like I go to work, I get paid. I go home to my way too big to be real apartment and lay there thinking;", she paused, following a soft groan. He realized how dry her voice sounded now. "What the hell am I doing?"
A rerun of an episode from Big Bang Theory was on, it should do. "Oh, I've been there."
"That makes me feel worse."
He chuckled again. "Thank you, that definitely reassured my already damaged ego."
That made Wanda laugh a lot harder, to the point that he had to pull away the phone from his ear so she wouldn't make him deaf. "Well, you're welcome."
Bojack blurted out something he might as well regret, but he couldn't help it.
"I missed you, Wanda."
Silence for a full minute, only the background noise of Sheldon saying 'coitus', or Raj being stupid. And it wasn't even a neutral silence. Bojack could feel his stomach eating itself, his 'inner voice' saying shit over and over again.
Wanda sighed, the soft noise making Bojack's phone vibrate, and making him shoot up from his seat. "I kind of did too."
His eyes soften. "Really?"
"Well, I missed you because you made me a lot happier, and that you cared. Not that you were an asshole."
"Still an asshole." He jokingly corrected her.
"Well, maybe you could call again sometime so we could talk when we're both sober?"
"Yeah."
He would be almost hearing her smile if such a thing were possible. "That would be great."
"Happy birthday, Wanda."
"Thanks, Bojack."
This a little shorter than usual, but I hope you like it.