Chapter One

Dean pulled up in the lot and gazed up at his old school. It was more or less the same, at least from the outside. Most of the lights were out, but for the ones in the cafeteria and the main entrance.

'Why do you even want to go to this?' Sam complained beside him. 'You hated high school.'

'Are you kidding? I heard Rhonda Hurley's going to this thing, I want to see if she's still that hot. Might be looking at a MILF situation here, Sammy.'

Dean rolled his eyes and got out of the car, the door squeaking as he did so, and he made a mental note to oil it once they were back home.

'This is stupid,' Sam continued, once he was out of the car himself. 'So you want to go to this crap for whatever reason, why do you have to drag me into it?'

'Trust me, you're not gonna want to miss this,' Dean laughed.

'Sure about that?'

Dean just ignored him, and walked across the parking lot.

There were a lot of people milling around in the entrance, and Dean didn't recognise any of them. He did, however, recognise the reception, right down to the rough, blue carpets, and the polished wooden bench. He'd spent a lot of time on that very bench, waiting for the principal to come and get him.

The frames on the wall were still the same, though the pictures inside had changed, and the red and white hangings still draped over the doorway.

'Heh, go Bobcats, am I right?' Dean laughed.

Sam just tutted, unimpressed.

Dean signed the register on the reception desk, and stuck on his nametag. 'Look at that, now everyone will know who I am,' he grinned.

'I think everyone will know who you are, anyway,' said Sam.

'What's that supposed to mean?'

'I'm just saying, I bet you there is not one person here who does not remember Dean Winchester.'

Dean grinned. 'Yeah, damn right.'

They walked through to the other side of the reception and out through the double doors. Another hallway ran along the other side of the door, this one slightly less lit, and there were frames upon frames of previous classes lining the walls.

'Hey, there we are,' Dean laughed, pointing at the photo of his graduating class.

Sam squinted at it, then gave Dean a suspicious look. 'So, let me get this straight, you drove all the way here, just because you wanted to see Rhonda Hurley?'

Dean glanced at him. 'Yeah, why?' he said, not entirely convincingly.

Sam looked back at the photo, staring past the fuzzy quality to find someone in particular. 'Are you sure you're not here because you want to see if Cas will come?'

Dean scoffed loudly. 'No!'

Sam just raised his eyebrows.

'No!' Dean insisted again. 'He's not coming to this, come on.' Dean walked away, and back out into the air, towards the next block.

'Dean, you know it's a bad idea, right? Things didn't exactly end well with you guys.'

'I'm aware, thanks, Sam.'

He led the way across the courtyard to another set of double doors. On the inside, opposite the doors, stood the trophy cabinet. Some of the shelves were still bare, but the school had acquired a few more trophies since Dean had left.

The corridor wrapped around to the left, the walls painted green, and their shoes tapped on the hard floor, that was somehow an uglier green than the walls.

'Always wondered why they painted these green,' Dean mused, staring at the walls, and up at the large TV mounted in the corner. It was turned off, and it hadn't been there before, but Dean assumed it was there for school announcements, rather than the crackly speakers that had been stuck up there before.

The doors to the cafeteria were the only ones in the school still made of wood, rather than plastic, and they opened out into the corner of the room.

Almost everyone was inside by then, crowding around and chattering loudly. The room had been decorated in tacky ribbons, and hung with the school logo.

'Dude, why didn't you tell me we had to dress up?' Sam said uncomfortably, taking in the suits and dresses around the room.

They themselves were wearing their regular jeans and shirts, and Sam self-consciously tugged his jacket closed, though it didn't help much.

'Because who cares?' Dean said, eyeing up the temporary bar that had been set up on the other side of the room.

All the chairs had been stacked up around three edges of the room, and a band were occupying the stage on the fourth wall.

Dean went down the steps, onto the wooden floor, and walked directly over to the bar, where he got them both a bottle of beer. 'Cheers!' he said, tapping his bottle to Sam's.

'Dean, stop,' Sam said. 'How stupid do you think I am?'

Dean took a swig of his beer. 'You don't want me to answer that.'

'You want him to be here, don't you?'

Dean scowled. 'Now that really is stupid.' He walked away, but Sam followed.

'Did you really think I was gonna fall for that Rhonda Hurley crap?'

'Sam-'

'Don't "Sam" me. What are you thinking?'

'I'm not thinking anything. I'm just here to have a good time, and catch up with everybody.'

'Really? So you used your plus one to bring your brother, instead of a date, because you didn't really want people to know you're single?'

'That - that's ridiculous-'

'You can't go near him, Dean,' Sam said. 'Not after what you did to him.'

Dean clenched his jaw, anger rising in his stomach. 'You shut up about that, okay? I'm gonna go mingle, or whatever you do at these things.' Dean backed away again. 'He's not coming to this thing anyway, why would he?'

Sam raised his hands. 'Dean-'

'Last I heard, he was some fancy doctor in New York, or something, there's no way he's here.'

'No, Dean, behind you-'

Dean turned, and walked right into someone, knocking their wine out of their hand and all over their white shirt. He looked up, and was confronted by a familiar set of blue eyes, and dark messy hair. His voice caught in his throat, and he froze in place, watching the wine stain spread. 'Cas,' he said hoarsely.

Cas sighed, looking down at his shirt. 'Dean Winchester,' he said flatly. 'Still causing trouble, I see.'

Dean was mortified, but even after all this time, Cas's low, rumbling voice was music to his ears. His stomach squirmed, and he tingled all over. He opened his mouth to apologise, but nothing came out.

'Luckily, I always keep a spare in my car,' Cas muttered, then walked off, out of the wooden cafeteria doors.

Dean stared dumbly after him until he heard Sam laugh.

'Well, that was smooth,' Sam sniggered.

Dean looked at him, then back at the door Cas had left through.

'Don't do it,' Sam said, following his gaze.

Dean looked at Sam again, biting his lip.

'Do not go after him, Dean.'

Dean shifted from one foot to the other, but he couldn't stop himself. Now that he knew Cas was here, Dean needed to see him again.

'No, Dean-' But Sam couldn't stop him.

Dean strode across the cafeteria, out of the doors, and back outside. He saw Cas taking the shortcut between the blocks, so he wouldn't have to go back through the reception to get to his car. Dean took a deep breath through his nose. 'I must be out of my mind,' he muttered, then followed Cas into the parking lot.

Cas was at a small, blue car, digging through the trunk.

Dean eyed it distastefully. 'This is your car?'

Cas didn't respond, and Dean mentally kicked himself.

They both stood in silence for a moment, then Cas took off his overcoat, his jacket, and his tie, and passed them to Dean.

Dean just held them, unable to move from the spot he was standing in, as Cas stripped off his shirt. He couldn't tear his eyes away. The Cas he remembered was beautiful. Dean would even go so far as to say enchanting, though not within anyone's earshot. The Cas in front of him now was even moreso. He hadn't thought it was possible, but here he was. Dean's eyes wandered up and down Cas's muscled, tanned torso, and he swallowed. Dean cleared his throat and licked his lips. 'What - what are you doing here?' he asked.

Cas gave him a sharp look, and Dean's knees might as well have been made of jelly.

'What are you doing here?' Cas countered, throwing the accusation at Dean. He yanked a fresh shirt from the trunk and threw it around his shoulders. 'I take it you followed me out here for a reason.'

'I - um - I don't really know...' Dean's voice trailed off as he watched Cas's fingers deftly button up his shirt.

Cas then took his clothes back from Dean, throwing his coat into the trunk before slamming it closed.

'Listen, Cas, I-'

'Chicago,' Cas interrupted, putting his jacket back on.

'What?'

'I work in Chicago. Not New York.'

'Oh.' Dean just stood awkwardly.

Cas locked his car and turned away, and Dean finally found the muscles in his legs.

'Cas, wait,' Dean said, jogging after him.

'What do you want, Dean?' Cas demanded, rounding on him.

Dean thought he might burst into flame from the furious glare Cas gave him. 'I - I -' Dean sighed, and his shoulders slumped. 'I wanted to tell you I'm sorry.'

Cas stared at him incredulously, and looked up at the sky. 'You're sorry?' he said, with a short, bitter laugh.

'I am, Cas. I'm so sorry.'

Cas put his hands on his hips. 'I don't care if you're sorry. Leave me alone.' He turned away again, but Dean ran around to stand in front of him.

'Hold on a sec,' he said. 'You never gave me a chance to explain.'

'You didn't deserve one,' Cas growled.

Dean winced. 'You're still mad.'

Cas narrowed his eyes. 'Of course I am,' he said, then looked down at the floor. 'You broke my heart.'

'I know I did,' Dean said quietly. 'But you know how everything was with my dad, you know what he was like. He wanted me to be…' Dean raised his hands, looking for the words. 'I was just confused, and I didn't know what to do. Obviously I made the wrong decision.'

'Obviously.'

Dean sighed, and stepped closer to Cas. 'If it makes you feel any better, he's dead now.'

'How is that supposed to make me feel better?'

Dean pinched the bridge of his nose. 'I'm just - I'm trying to explain here, okay? I'm not making excuses, I just want you to understand.'

Cas didn't say anything, but gestured for Dean to continue.

Dean let out a breath. 'Wow, okay, I wasn't really planning on doing this today, but here goes.' He rubbed the back of his head, shifting uncomfortable under Cas's razor sharp glare. 'First off, I never wanted to hurt you. For what it's worth, you were one of the better things going on in my life at the time.'

Cas didn't move, or respond.

'My dad found out about us, and let's just say he - he wasn't happy about it.' Dean shivered, the places the bruises had been still itched when he thought about them. 'I didn't want him to be mad at me again… It was stupid, I know that, and I'm sorry. I was scared, and upset, and I handled it terribly.' Dean stopped and stared at Cas, watching as he absorbed the information. It had been a long time since he'd let this much out at once, but something about Cas always made him want to lay his heart right out there, for Cas to do whatever he wanted with it.

Cas shook his head. 'What do you want from me, Dean? Do you want me to forgive you?'

Dean shrugged. 'Only if you think I deserve it. I don't think I do, but it's not up to me, is it?'

'No, it isn't,' Cas said harshly.

Dean shuffled slightly closer again, but this time, Cas took a long step backwards, and folded his arms, shaking his head. 'Even if I could - if I could get past all that…' Cas hesitated. 'Did it have to be Anna?'

Dean's stomach twisted. He could see all the history, the bitterness and the anger behind the deep blue of Cas's eyes, but underneath that, there was still hurt, and the nights Cas had spent crying into his pillow. He had no words, nothing to say to counter it, and this time when Cas walked away, Dean let him.

Cas disappeared back inside the building, but Dean remained where he was in the parking lot, deflated. Of course he hadn't expected anything from Cas. He didn't know what he expected exactly, but so far it wasn't going well.

Dean sighed, then went back inside, thirsty for something a little stronger than beer.

Hi everyone, turns out I could only last three whole days without writing, so here I am with whatever this is lol. Hope you enjoy it, since I'm still kinda stuck on Heart Sense. Only gonna be a short one, just for a bit of fun.