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Another Stupid Isekai Afterlife

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Chapter One

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Another Awfully Bland Beginning

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The sheriff's deputy remained seated at the rear of the ambulance even as others busied themselves with other tasks around the accident scene. Even the EMT checking him over and the state trooper standing nearby were busy scribbling notes into notebooks.

"So, aside from being battered and bruised from the roll down the hill, you're alright?" asked the trooper.

He nodded, "Yeah. Still can't believe it though."

"You can't believe you are alive?" the EMT asked.

"All of it. That truck driver doing what he did, as well as the accident itself."

"He pushed you out of the way. If he hadn't..." the state trooper trailed off, leaving the obvious conclusion unsaid.

"If he hadn't pushed me, how about if I hadn't pulled him over to let him know his taillights were out? How about that?" The first deputy shuddered as he paused in his tirade to consider something. "After all, I was tired of sitting where I was, and decided to move. He just happened to pass by when I was about to pull out onto the road."

"I think I am done here. Do you need anything from me?" the EMT asked.

The deputy shook his head before saying, "I'm fine for now. At least physically."

The EMT nodded before walking to the front of the ambulance. Once there, he took in the accident scene before him. It was dark, so all he could really see was the lights on the trailer of the second semi, referred to as 'Vehicle 3,' but he could make out the vague shape of the semi and trailer at the front.

He could not make out the deputy's car in between both semis. He considered that a good thing. Especially since no one had figured out yet what to do about the crushed vehicle. Or the body between the vehicle and the trailer of the first semi.

"God, what a mess," said the state trooper as he came up behind the EMT.

"Watch your step. I don't need you to slip and fall."

"Yeah. Are they still trying to take pictures?" asked the trooper.

"It looks like it."

"Hope the wrecker gets here soon. No one needs to see this on their way to work."

The EMT nodded his agreement as both men watched.

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"So this is what being dead is like."

I looked around. The ground I was standing on looked like polished shale. The sky was covered with dark clouds that threatened to pour rain all over me, but the air felt too dry for it. Being from Kansas I know what the air feels like before a thunderstorm. This wasn't thunderstorm weather. Even if the sky was almost as gray as the ground, it didn't feel like thunderstorm weather.

There was nothing else to look at. I had no way of measuring distance as there was nothing to use to measure. Which meant that the clouds over my head could be a long distance away or just hundreds of feet.

I sighed. It was official. I was slowly becoming annoyed.

I knew I was dead. Even if I had somehow survived what happened to me, I'd be in severe pain, or completely unconscious because of the pain and concussive force. And yet, here I was.

I wasn't upset at being dead. I wasn't upset about how I died. But I was becoming annoyed at the notion that I was stuck in Limbo. I suppose this was one way to keep me from haunting people.

"I am soooo sorry for the delay, but I am here now."

I turned to the source of the voice behind me, and was surprised to see an angel. Female and very short. If she were human, I'd guess her age to be in the early 20's, with her height somewhere about four foot six to four foot eight. Assuming I was still standing at my normal height anyway. Also assuming she was even an angel, although she might be glowing as I imagined one would, there was a distinct absence of wings and halo.

As I opened my mouth to speak, she resumed speaking, "My apologies, but we were discussing the fact that your life was cut too short, and what could be done about it as there is no way to bring you back to life."

I stopped and blinked at her, "Huh?" Before she could start again I pressed onward without thinking, "What do you mean 'cut too short?' I was 48 years old. It wasn't as if I had a bad life or anything like that."

"Oh it was cut too short. That was the one thing everyone agreed on."

I considered asking who 'everyone' was, but decided that way lie madness and instead asked, "So what happens now? Reincarnation isn't something I had planned for."

"Well, technically it isn't reincarnation as you are going to be placed into a different realm, but since you performed a noble act as your final act, you get to choose which realm you go to."

"I can't imagine shoving a sheriff's deputy down a hill to be a noble act, but it does beat the alternative of both of us being squished by that other truck slamming into his car." I shuddered at the memory. Before I could ask what my options were, something she said decided to settle in my ever-curious mind.

"Define 'placed?'"

It was evidently her turn to blink at me. Apparently she had not expected the question. Before she could recover, I pressed the issue. I asked, "Since you've admitted that it technically isn't reincarnation, that would imply that I am not going to be reborn as a baby, but that I am going to be 'placed' as a fully grown adult in a realm of my choosing. Am I correct?"

"Technically, yes."

Technically correct was the best kind of correct as far as I was concerned. I was feeling better about my chances about finding a realm that I could be comfortable in. I nodded and asked "So, what are my options?"

She smiled, waved her hand, and summoned a book as tall and wide as my upper leg was long. Not to mention just as thick. So much for my optimism. I sighed. I had to. My life had never been easy, so why should I expect my afterlife to be any easier?