DISCLAIMER: THIS STORY WAS NOT ORIGINALLY WRITTEN BY ME!!! The original was done by my friend Lorelei (@Xx.Irrelevant.Trash.xX) and it is originally titled "Stuck in another bad dream". You can find it in my favorite and follow stories on my profile, I highly recommend reading it. YES I DO HAVE PERMISSION TO WRITE THIS, I DID NOT STEAL HER IDEA. She gave me permission to rewrite her story since I liked it so much. I did retitle it and change a few things so I wasn't just copying her, but for the most part, this is entirely her idea. FULL CREDIT GOES TO HER.

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Freed POV

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I don't think I've ever had such a terrible day in my life. It was absolutely awful.

Now, I've had bad days before. And on those days, I'd walk around feeling like literally everyone was judging me. I could swear that they were all staring at me, at my odd features like my long hair and lightning-shaped cowlicks, and laughing at me behind my back, thinking I didn't know that they were. Those days were the most painful, because the fear of being judged so harshly made me anxious. When I'm anxious, I can't do anything right and my usual grace leaves me. I become extremely clumsy, and I end up breaking something in the long run because my hands are shaking so badly.

Levy likes to tell me not to worry. She says absolutely nobody is watching me, staring at me. Nobody's judging me or laughing at me. I have some sort of psychological issue called the "invisible audience", she says. But I didn't really believe her. After all, she's no doctor, she's no psychologist. I would've taken it from Wendy, who actually knows things like that, but not from a fellow script mage.

Another good reason why I didn't believe her was because of today.

I went to the market, completely alone because Laxus had gone out to visit with Natsu and Gray for the day. That was a mistake. I scarcely left the house alone for this very reason.

Some dumb kid ran up to me and demanded to know if I was a guy or a girl. I stiffened, cleared my throat, and calmly told him that I was male. The damn kid's shrill laughter echoed through the entire market. He told me that I couldn't possibly be a male, that I looked like a girl, and on and on and on until I thought my head was gonna explode. The stupid kid was making such a scene that now everyone was looking at me. I was absolutely mortified.

So I left with as much dignity as I could salvage from my tarnished pride. The first place I went was to the pond by the guild to feed the ducks. As I offered the precious little birds pieces of bread, I felt tears running down my face, hot and fast. The ducks' little clucks and coos as they eagerly waddled over to me to be fed were calming. Comforting, even.

"At least you guys don't judge me..." I whispered, as the brown duck nearest me snapped a piece of bread out of my hand with her bluish-gray bill.

I don't think people realize that I take everything they say to heart. And I don't think I've figured out yet that people can be so careless with their words. People don't always say what they mean, yet I treat them as if they do. They tell me I'm so overemotional about everything, so I try my hardest not to cry in front of anyone except the ducks. I've also been told that what I do to myself is unhealthy. By trying to please everyone, I end up tearing myself apart. Or so Evergreen says. But I don't believe her either.

She once told me that I don't do nearly enough work for the guild, so I tried to surprise her by doing all her work for her instead. But that only annoyed her so badly that she just started screaming at me.

I remember sitting there with my face buried in my hands, listening to her go on and on about how I'm such a pest and I should stop being that way. "I'm sorry, I thought you'd be proud of me..." I had mumbled, muffled by my hands.

After that, I cried until my chest ached and decided I'd never listen to Evergreen again.

But today was even worse than that, because I was super insecure about my looks and hated it when people called me a girl.

Feeling exhausted and sore from all the crying I had done, I bade my ducks farewell and walked to the guild. As soon as I entered, all the conversation in the room ceased to exist and it got deathly quiet. It was strange. Usually everyone in the guild was so loud and upbeat. But now, I could feel all their eyes burning into me. Before I could break down and cry under the unbearable pressure of their stares, I went right to my dorm room and slammed the door. I was so tired, I just wanted to sleep.

So I crawled into bed, curled up into a little ball under my blankets on my side with my knees drawn up to my chest, and fell asleep.

...or so I thought.

I was startled by the sensation of sinking. Falling. I felt like I was falling infinitely through the floor, through earth itself, as if the ground was trying to swallow me whole. It was slow at first, slow and gentle, but a moment later I was plummeting. Fast and hard. Everything hurt and I knew it would hurt even worse when I hit wherever it was this downward spiral was taking me.

Maybe I'd land in such a way that I'd break my neck or snap my spine and die. I welcomed the idea. It would make all this pain go away.

But when I landed, it was like I had been gently set down on my feet. And I was surrounded by darkness. I didn't know if my eyes were opened or closed. But then I saw something. A few somethings. They were glowing, so full of color and light. I hesitantly took a couple steps closer. They looked like... Pictures? Had I landed in a gallery of some sort? I didn't know. I kept creeping closer until I could make out what they were.

Indeed, they were pictures. Pictures of me and my friends, of all the fun things we had done together, of all the amazing missions we'd accomplished and silly moments we'd had. I laughed when I came across the picture of the time we had gone ice skating. Laxus couldn't get his feet under him, the ice was too slippery, so he ended up falling face-first and tripping all of us up. Me, Ever and Bix ended up in a complex dog pile on top of him, laughing hysterically and trying to get off of each other.

All these wonderful memories reminded me of what people say about death. Your life always flashes before your eyes as you die. Was this it? Was I actually dying?

Suddenly the floor opened up again and I was falling harder and faster than before. And oh, Christ, how it hurt. I tried to scream, but nothing came out. It was like the sound had gotten choked up in my throat.

The fall was relatively quick, but again, the landing was gentle and I was put down on my feet. Instantly, bright, flashing images filled the air. It was another gallery, but this time it was all my bad memories.

All the times I had messed up, all the time someone had yelled at me or hurt me or scared me, all the times Laxus shook his head sadly and called me a disappointment, all the times everything was so wrong that I wished I could just... Die.

Suddenly one of the memories loomed in front of me, filling my entire vision. It was familiar. I knew what it was. It was the time we were on a mission, and I had been trying to rescue people when the building I was in collapsed on top of me. I had been crushed under stones, debris, and other things I didn't recognize.

Suddenly the image of the memory dragged me into it. That's the best way to describe what happened

Because suddenly I was trapped under a heavy boulder that used to be the ceiling of the building I was in. Everything was on fire around me. The heat burned my skin. I kept my eyes jammed shut because I was scared of what I might see if I opened them.

"Freed? Freed?" a panicked voice whispered, right by my ear.

It startled me. But then I realized I was whimpering in pain, and tears were streaming down my face. Something unbelievably heavy had my left arm and right leg pinned. It was crushing me into the floor, turning my flesh and bones into a bloody pulp. It hurt. Everything hurt. I couldn't stop whimpering weakly, in too much pain to scream or struggle. I knew someone was looking for me, but I couldn't move. It hurt to breathe. It felt like my entire body was being pierced by the tips of the sharpest swords, over and over again, cutting into my skin and ripping me apart, piece by excruciatingly painful piece...

I heard someone screaming my name. "Freed! Freed!"

Finally I managed to open my eyes. Laxus was there. His face was streaked with dirt and soot from the collapsed building he'd fought through to get to me. He worked quickly, rolling the heavy boulder off of me as carefully as possible. Now it was my turn to scream. I couldn't help it, it hurt so much. Laxus's eyes widened as he saw what the heavy chunk of ceiling had done to my body. All that was left of my arm and leg was a tangled mess of flesh, strips of torn skin and fractured bone. Blood was splattered everywhere, pooling around the mangled limbs, forming dark puddles.

I was so scared and everything hurt so badly that I passed out.

When I "woke up" again, I was back in that strange room of dark memories. My memories. I was so glad that it was over, but for whatever reason, I could still feel the pain of having crushed limbs. It hurt dreadfully. I was still crying and trembling all over like I had been in the memory, and because there was still that horrible pain, I panicked and glanced down at my body, quickly examining my arms and legs and torso. I heaved a sigh of relief and relaxed a little bit. The pain was beginning to fade, and I was all in one piece. The mangled flesh hadn't followed me out of the memory. I was clean and untouched. My body wasn't crushed into a bloody pulp.

"Everything is fine." I whispered to myself. My voice sounded nothing like my own in this weird place. It sounded softer, lighter, more like a child's than my own. For a second I fancied it was the voice of my past self, of me when I was a kid.

That brought uncomfortable memories of my abusive parents to my mind, so I quickly pushed them back before this memory room could drag me into them.

But then another image of a memory flickered in front of me, and I couldn't fight it because it was so unexpected.

Next thing I knew, I was back in my dorm room reading a book in bed. Laxus suddenly burst in, flinging the door open like he wanted to break it. The sound startled me and I jumped a little, my head snapping up to look at him, eyes wide with alarm. A warm smile crossed my face and I started to relax when I realized it was just Laxus. I opened my mouth to greet him, but suddenly he just started... Yelling at me.

He was so angry I could barely understand what he was saying. He kept calling me useless, pathetic, a failure, an idiot, and pretty much every other nasty name you can imagine. His voice was so loud and so very upset that it seemed to pierce my skull and reverberate around in my head, which had begun to ache from the stress at being screamed at. I didn't even know why he was so mad. So I just sat there and took it, silent tears tracing their way down my face, my mouth open in a silent question I didn't dare ask for fear of angering him even worse.

"Tell me why..."

It appeared my inability to speak just made him even more mad. Suddenly he grabbed my wrist, looming over me like a dark shadow, eyes flashing with anger. Sparks of electricity flew from his fingers, and he suddenly hit me with the mother of all lightning bolts. I didn't scream as the intense electricity tore through my body, causing my skin to split open in several places an my mind to go so numb I didn't even feel the pain. Blood sprayed across Laxus's shirt, forming bright red starbursts on the white fabric. Only then did I see the fear and regret in his once angry eyes as he realized what he had done.

Then came the pain. It spread through me like a hunting tiger, slow and intimidating, building in intensity as it advanced. I tried to fight it, tried to stay awake, but I couldn't. I collapsed, thinking that I was going to die, and allowed the warm darkness of unconsciousness to wash over me.

This time I welcomed it.

But although the agony from Laxus's magic stayed in the nightmare, the emotional pain from the mental abuse I had suffered followed me into the dark to torture me further.

Laxus's angry, hateful words echoed around me. I was suspended in pitch black air, I couldn't see anything or feel anything except the cold. All I could hear was his angry voice taunting me. And then the voices of my friends and guildmates joined his, tormenting me with their careless words that I always took so seriously.

Useless, pathetic, stupid, know-it-all, good-for-nothing, ugly, feminine, disgusting, annoying, whiny, stuck-up, try-hard, overachiever, idiot, weak...

I just curled in on myself and tried to shut it out. By now I knew this was a dream. I just had to wait for this nightmare to be over. I would wake up soon and this would end.

It felt like I had been trapped in the darkness for weeks, months, even years. Trapped with the voices of my friends, of people I loved and trusted, spitting hatred at me.

But then... Suddenly I was in the Fairy Tail infirmary, wrapped in a blanket, lying on my back. I could faintly hear the chattering of my guildmates outside the closed door. It smelled clean, like freshly washed linen. And I was warm, and there was light. The familiar sights and sounds and smells immediately calmed my racing heart. I was safe. This wasn't another dream.

"Freed? Are you okay?" a familiar voice asked from beside me.

Laxus was there. Suddenly am image of his lightning ripping apart my body flashed before my eyes, and a shriek bubbled out of my lips as I shoved him away from me and curled into a little ball, sobbing hysterically.

"Please don't hurt me!" I cried, hiding my face in my hands and curling further into myself.

I knew this wasn't a dream, but I was still in shock from the last nightmare so all I could think was, I really don't want to get hit by lightning.

I tried to force myself to faint, tried to escape back into the darkness of unconsciousness, hoping that I'd never wake up again. I couldn't handle this, it was too much. Everything hurt, especially my heart. I felt like I had been battered to pieces by all these memories, by those voices taunting me and telling me exactly what they thought of me. I wanted to die, wanted to die so this would all be over. So I could stop waking up to more pain.

Suddenly I felt strong arms wrap around me. I was being lifted up. Was this how dying felt?

I felt a warm breath on the side of my neck, and suddenly gentle fingers combed through my long hair. The touch was so soft and sweet I wanted to cry. No, I already was crying. I could feel the tears on my face. Warm, soft lips pressed to my temple, and I heard Laxus's voice whisper, "It's okay, Freed. It's okay. I'm not gonna hurt you, you're safe. Everything is fine. I've got you."

I shifted and started to cry even harder, although I didn't want to. Laxus had never held me like this before, never spoken to me with such tender affection in his voice before, never kissed me before. And it felt too good to be true, so I refused to believe it.

"I-Is this... A-Another bad dream?" I stammered out, voice weak and thin and frightened.

Is it?

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Once again, this story was not originally written by me. It was written by my best friend Lorelei (@Xx.Irrelevant.Trash.xX) and her story is titled "Stuck in another bad dream". Please give it a read, it's really quite good. In fact, it's s good that I felt the need to write it in my own way because you know how I am. I got hella inspired and she gave me permission to do this so yay. HOPE YOU LIKED IT, LOVE Y'ALL!!!

-UltimatexAdmin