Chapter One: Wounds, Old and New

Sakura Haruno sat on her bedroom floor, wrapped in a fluffy white towel and clutching a worn, crumpled paper. She'd read this particular paper so many times she'd practically memorized it, but still her eyes scanned over the scrawled, slightly messy handwriting religiously.

I thought this would be it for me. The love to end all loves. My last thought was that such a simple thing as distance would come between us. But was it really just the distance? Wasn't it more than that?

A lack of communication — that was the real problem, I think. I love you, Sakura. I always will, no matter where we stand.

But this is it.

The pinkette found her eyes blurring with tears and she wiped them away hastily, setting the letter aside and shaking her head. A lack of communication: that was the real problem.

It hadn't just been him. It had been her, too. They'd both let this fall apart — but Sakura could pinpoint the moment it had begun, and she had to accept fault for it. The last time he'd visited her in Konoha, she'd purposely neglected to tell him about the threats she'd received upon coming home about 8 months prior… and someone else had let slip about it. The puppet master had been extremely upset that he'd heard about it through a third party… and she couldn't blame him. Sakura hadn't been entirely sure why she hid it from him — but she did know that she didn't want to burden him with something that had been nothing more than a small scare. Nothing had come of it — she'd tried to assure him of that — but the damage to their relationship had been done. Perhaps it was old wounds that caused the rift to form between them, or maybe it had been new wounds caused by the physical distance. She couldn't be sure, and either way, it was a moot point now.

It was over, had been for a couple of months.

Of course her friends had comforted her in the beginning, had been there while she cried and wailed and went through her emotions; but while her pain lingered, her friends hadn't. She couldn't be angry at them — they had their own lives to live. They were getting married and making new families… while Sakura ate her feelings and shoved the tears back. The one good thing in her life at the moment was her work at the hospital; she'd become the head doctor there and the place was flourishing. Many new ninja took her medical ninjutsu classes and entered the field, and most of those came back to work at the hospital frequently.

Speaking of work… she had to go. Standing up, and safely tucking the crumpled letter away into a drawer, the pinkette got dressed and threw on her white coat, heading out for the day. Arriving at Konoha Infirmary, which had expanded exponentially in the last year, Sakura grabbed a cup of coffee and took a file from the desk in her office; her first patient for the day…

One Neji Hyuga.

He'd been gravely injured in the Great Shinobi War, and at first Sakura hadn't thought he would survive… but he was strong and resilient. With many surgeries and healing sessions, he pulled through — but not without complications. The injuries had done irreversible damage to his limbs. Sakura and Tsunade both had studied extensively during these years to try to somehow reverse the damage or open up new nerve pathways to give him back full use of his limbs… but nothing had worked, so far. So currently, while she researched new techniques and interventions, she was in charge of his physical therapy.

As she approached the doorway to the physical therapy room, the pinkette saw the long-haired Hyuga already there, sitting with his back to the door and his cane propped up beside his chair. Opening the door slowly, she lingered in the doorway, blowing on her coffee as her green eyes rested on him. "You look very contemplative," she mused.

He didn't turn to look at her, didn't even move. "It was so frustrating, at first." Sakura remained silent, wondering if he'd continue. His voice broke the silence, quiet and filled with thought. "I'd lay awake at night. Every night. Angry. Useless."

"You've never been useless," Sakura countered, finally leaning off the doorway and fully entering the room. Dropping the file on a nearby counter, the pinkette took the coffee over to where he was seated and plopped down next to him, sighing. "But I understand how you feel."

His expression was dark. "You can't possibly understand."

"I do." Her eyes were kind, even if the attitude flared her temper. She'd learned quite well to control it when needed. "I spent years feeling that way. Finally decided I had enough of it, and I grew up."

"I can't exactly 'will' myself out of these injuries."

"You're right. But — I've never worked harder to get someone back into tip-top shape. Don't give up, Neji-san, because I haven't." Sakura's free hand came up to his shoulder, resting on it in reassurance. "We're close. And we're making big steps every day. We'll work through this together, alright?"

Neji pressed his lips into a thin line, before nodding and using his hands on the arms of his chair to push himself to his feet. Grabbing onto his cane for support, he began slowly walking over to the twin balancing poles to practice his steps; Sakura watched after him, sipping on her coffee.

"FOREHEEEEAAAAAD! I'm HOOOOOOME!"

"This is a hospital, you Pig!" Sakura admonished, but there was a wide smile on her lips as she rushed out to the lobby to hug the blonde. Pulling back, she faked an expression of disgust. "Phew! Where the hell did you go? You smell like a sewer."

"Not any worse than the smell in your whole house," Ino replied in a sing-song voice, slinging an arm over the pinkette's shoulders. "Come on. Come have dinner with me. Sai still hasn't gotten back from his own mission yet and I'm lonely."

"Ino, I… I don't know. I haven't been out in a while."

"Which is exactly why you should come with me." Ino suddenly fell silent, blue eyes focusing on something behind Sakura. A smirk curled the blonde's lips and she nodded in the direction she was looking. "Hotness alert."

Sakura glanced back to see Neji emerging from a hallway into the lobby; he was clearly leaning on his cane for support, but he walked with such a dignity and grace that she almost didn't notice, despite having been his doctor for about a year now. Her brows furrowed. "N-Neji-san?"

"You've been doctoring him for a year now, Forehead — a whole year and you still haven't made a move?! What is wrong with you?"

Sakura shushed the blonde, feeling heat rise to her cheeks. "I was in a relationship until recently, you idiot," she mumbled, casting another glance back at the Hyuga. "Besides… Neji?"

"Who cares about that, he's hot!" Ino chided, turning her head to follow Neji with her eyes as he passed by them. "Oi! Neji-san!" she called before Sakura could stop her, earning a slap on the arm from the pinkette. "Forehead and I are about to have dinner! Want to join us? My treat!"

The Hyuga stopped mid-step and slowly glanced back at them. His eyes were hard and a frown curled his lips; but his voice was soft. "I appreciate the offer… but no, thank you." And he turned and left.

Sakura released a breath she hadn't known she'd been holding and slapped Ino on the arm again, earning a mischievous laugh from the blonde. After Sakura went to quickly clock out, she hung up her coat and returned to Ino. Arm in arm, the two went to dinner at the dango shop down the street.

As they waited for their food, Sakura stared at her steaming cup of green tea, deep in thought. About working with Neji, about her nonexistent love life, about the past, about everything. Ino was chatting about the mission she'd gone on and Sakura was only half-listening; wondering why on earth she was suddenly thinking about these things now when up until this point she'd been shoving it all down and focusing on her work.

Perhaps it was Ino's presence again after being gone on a month-long mission. While she loved Ino, and had convinced herself that all was forgiven when it came to the obnoxious blonde, Sakura was beginning to wonder if there was still some unresolved tension there. Ino was not particularly well-known for keeping secrets — still, the last thing she'd expected was for the kunoichi to go blabbing to Kankuro about the threats Sakura had received.

Ino was the one who'd told Kankuro. And while Sakura logically knew it was her own fault for not telling the brunette herself, she wondered if a part of her resented Ino for being the catalyst of their failed relationship.

Ino had apologized profusely — but the damage had been done, hadn't it? No number of "I'm sorry" would bring Kankuro back to her.

A certain name brought the pinkette out of her thoughts. "So what about Neji?" Ino asked.

Sakura groaned. "Not this again!"

"Yes, again! Sakura's it's been a few months now — it's okay to move on. Get yourself some of that Hyuga booty!"

The pinkette felt her temples throbbing with irritation. "What the hell makes you think I'm interested, Pig?! Besides, even if I was, have you seen him? He's more closed off and antisocial than —"

"— than your vagina?" Ino finished with a quirked brow.

"PIG!"

"Listen, Forehead — all I'm saying is… since you've got access to Neji Hyuga like no one else does, why not get to know him?"

Sakura growled in frustration, but relented. "I don't know, Ino. I guess getting to know him couldn't be so bad. But lay off, would you?"

"Fine! Fine! OH — did you get that letter from Setsuko?!" Ino exclaimed, hands slamming on the table excitedly.

Sakura's eyes lit up. "I did," she confirmed. "I can't believe her anniversary to Makoto is in a couple of weeks!"

"I can't believe she invited us to a big party in Suna!" Ino replied chipperly. "It's going to be so fabulous, knowing her and her sense of style —" She paused, and her expression sobered when she met Sakura's eyes. "Are you… are you going to go?"

Sakura frowned, feeling a lump form in the back of her throat. "I — I don't know. The letter said everyone could bring a plus one… I feel like — maybe I could attend, if I didn't go alone… but I wouldn't even know who to bring."

"I have an idea," Ino replied devilishly.

"If you say Neji, I swear…"

"HOT HYUGA ASS!"

"PIG!"

Ino began cackling. "Seriously! Think about it! That poor lump needs to get out of the house, and you need a date! Just give it a thought."

Sakura's expression turned pensive. As she toyed with her food, she began considering, really considering Ino's suggestion.

"He's losing blood — suction. SUCTION!"

This was a routine surgery, perfect for students to learn something; what Sakura hadn't expected was for the patient's carotid to be nicked... and now this man was bleeding out before she could repair it. "I'm losing field of vision — someone get in there and SUCTION! And get three bags of O-negative, NOW!"

"Sats are dropping," another surgeon said urgently. "Flatline! We're losing him!"

"Damn it, WHERE IS THAT O-NEG?"

When Sakura walked into examination room #8, she'd adjusted her fresh lab coat and put on a brave face. Neji Hyuga glanced over at her, eyes hardening when he laid eyes on her. "You look terrible," he commented.

"Thanks," the pinkette replied sourly, before forcing a smile. "It's been a great day. How are you feeling?"

"You have blood in your hair."

Sakura had laid his file down on the counter and turned toward him, preparing to snap some gloves on — when she paused, that carefully practiced smile cracking. "I — w-what?"

"You have blood in your hair," Neji repeated seriously. "I'm assuming a surgery… did not go well."

Sakura bit her trembling lip; she wasn't sure if it was the weight of her broken heart or the anxiety of possibly going back to Suna, but it was suddenly terribly hard not to cry. She forced back the lump in her throat and blinked several times to avoid tears. "We… ah… we lost him," she murmured in a quivering voice. "It's… it's been a long day."

Neji stared at her for a moment, before grabbing his cane and standing up. "I can postpone my appointment for today."

Sakura's brows furrowed. Neji was never late, and he never skipped appointments. She wasn't sure if it was because he was desperate to be a shinobi again, or because he was simply a punctual person, but this was extremely out of character. Maybe he noticed just how upset she was, and was offering her a break, in his own way.

The thought made the pinkette feel guilty, but she also didn't want to offend him by rejecting his offer. "Neji!" she called as he left in the room. The brunette lingered in the doorway, glancing back at her expectantly. Sakura felt her face flushing in embarrassment. "I ahhh, could definitely use a shower and a break… but I really don't want to throw off our schedule by skipping our appointment today. Do you think… do you think it would be possible for you to stop by my home later? I have everything we need there, anyways."

He seemed to consider her offer for a moment; finally, he nodded stiffly and left the room.

Wrapping her short pink locks up in a towel and pulling her bathrobe tighter about her body, the pinkette began hastily cleaning her home, making sure every nook and cranny was spick and span. She didn't know Neji quite well enough to say for sure, but he just seemed like the type of person to enjoy tidiness.

That thought alone threw her off. She'd been working with him for a year — with the exception of her time in Suna — and she didn't know him well enough to know that? To be fair, it wasn't due to lack of effort on her part; Neji simply wasn't a social person. Besides Hinata, he didn't really have anyone super close to him. Even his teammates, as much as they loved him, were held at an arm's length. He truly was a closed book.

Still, something inside of Sakura wanted to try. She remembered Kankuro telling her one time that when someone acted like that, pushing everyone away, they were probably just in pain and that was the only way they could cope. He'd said all of Gaara's aggression was to hide his true feelings: loneliness. Maybe this was the same. Maybe Neji was just in pain. Or lonely.

The pinkette brushed off her thoughts of Kankuro; every time she did, her chest clenched. She didn't think her heart could take anymore cracks before it broke altogether.

A knock at the door disturbed her from her thoughts and she went to answer it, throwing it open with a smile. Neji stared at her with narrowed eyes rather than saying "hello," and it took only a moment for the kunoichi to figure out why. "My bathrobe!" she squeaked, smacking her forehead in embarrassment. "I'm so sorry, Neji-san. Come on in and make yourself comfortable. I'll go change."

She let him in and he sat down stiffly on her couch while she rushed into her room to throw some clothes on. Settling for a red qipao top and some black shorts, she removed the towel from her hair and grabbed some latex gloves from the box on her bathroom counter, making her way back out into her modest but clean living room. Neji sat on the couch, not having moved an inch, but his gaze was wandering the room, as if analyzing the room for imperfections. Annoyance laced her voice as she spoke. "I hope my cleanliness lives up to your expectations."

"Indeed," he murmured, distracted. When she came to sit down next to him, his eyes finally settled on her. "You look well."

Her expression softened as she snapped on her gloves. "I do feel better, thank you. Alright — are you ready?"

The Hyuga began shrugging out of his loose yukata top, already knowing the routine. Strong hands reached back to grab his long chestnut colored hair and sweep it over his shoulder, moving it out of her way. Perhaps it was Ino's stupid voice in her head, but Sakura found herself blushing. She'd seen Neji Hyuga's bare torso hundreds of times since becoming his primary doctor, and never once had she hesitated or flinched or thought twice about it.

Damn you, Ino-pig.

She cleared her throat nervously and set her hands on his shoulder, staring there; finally getting into the groove and focusing on her work, the pinkette began doing what she did best: medical ninjutsu. She began pouring her chakra into his nervous system, beginning to repair the damage the best she could. This was only a temporary fix; due to the nature of the rods that had pierced him during the war, shrapnel was now floating around in his veins — shrapnel that couldn't be removed, not without some new sort of technology… technology the ninja world wasn't capable of at this point. Medical ninjutsu could only do so much, as well. This was their routine; open up his nerves and reverse the damage until the floating shrapnel damaged them again, and keep up with his PT so he didn't lose any of his basic functions. This was a horrible limbo Neji was stuck in — not a vegetable but unable to resume his shinobi duties. No wonder he was so angry and resentful. And Sakura truly wished she could help him.

"Do you have dreams about it?" she found herself asking.

If Neji was as surprised by her question as she was, he didn't show it. "Dreams about what…?"

She swallowed. "... The war."

He remained silent for a moment, the only white noise in the room being the kunoichi's ceiling fan and the medical chakra flowing between them. Finally, he answered, his voice quiet. "All the time."

"I'm having trouble letting go of the past," she replied pensively. "Any advice…?"

Neji kept perfectly still as she continued healing him, taking his time with an answer. "It's difficult to let go of the past when you're still living in it."

The kunoichi was certain he was speaking about himself, but she had a feeling that statement applied to her too. Maybe she was stuck. Maybe that was why she couldn't seem to make herself feel any better. Maybe… maybe Ino had a point, as much as Sakura didn't want to admit it. "Ya know," she began, voice taking on a more optimistic tone, "things are improving. Your nerves are damaging at a much slower rate than they used to."

"I noticed," was his response.

"How are Lee and Tenten? I haven't seen them in a while."

At this, Neji glanced back at her with an arched brow. Sakura blushed in embarrassment; the way he was looking at her made her feel stupid… but she pressed on. "Listen, we've been doing this for a while, Neji-san. Would it be so terrible to humor me?"

He sighed. "They're fine." When she remained silent, he continued, albeit slightly reluctantly. "As far as I know, Lee is working on getting his own students. He's desperate for them. I hate to think of whatever poor sots get stuck with Lee as a teacher."

Sakura giggled. "Yeah, he's high-strung and a little over-eager, but his heart's in the right place."

"High-strung is a severe understatement. I'm sure you've heard the horror stories."

"Horror stories…?"

Neji's expression darkened. "You haven't been told about drunken Lee…?"

Sakura's eyes widened. "Oh. That. I… I've only heard a few stories. Is it really that bad…?"

He smiled. It was a wry, humorless smile, and yet Sakura somehow still found herself flushing with heat. "Whatever stories you've heard… it's ten times worse than that. You know the barbecue place that was recently renovated? Let's just say those repairs are coming out of Team Gai's pockets — all because Lee mistook the Sake for water."

The color drained from her face. "Are you serious? I saw the damage to that place, I wasn't sure what had caused it, but I thought it must've been bad…"

Neji grunted. "Let's just say he's no longer allowed on the premises."

"What about Tenten? I heard she's been a bit of an entrepreneur lately."

Neji pursed his lips. "I… haven't really spoken to Tenten lately. I do know she's been trying to buy property to open up her own weapons' shop."

Sakura's brows furrowed; her hands moved from Neji's shoulder down his arm, working on the nerves there. "You haven't spoken to her?" she asked as she slowly moved closer to his hand.

Neji shifted uncomfortably, averting his gaze. "We… had a falling out."

The pinkette tilted her head. "You're so close; she's your teammate. What could possibly…?"

"I… I was hurting, and angry. I said some things I shouldn't have said… and she got upset." He fell silent, offering his hand to her when she reached for it. When their fingers touched, Sakura felt a warmth that she hadn't felt before; but she had to stay focused on the task at hand. Any slip in her concentration of chakra flow and she could damage the tissue rather than repairing it…

Her eyes drifted between his face and the green glow emitting from her hand to his own. "I'm sorry," she said quietly. "For the record — I'm sure that if you just… talked to her, that you both could put this behind you and be friends again. You know; water under the bridge."

Neji grunted again and looked away, staring hard at the wall while she worked on his hand. "I don't know how." He swallowed. "I'm angry. Still angry."

Sakura's instinct was to lift a hand to his cheek in comfort, and on impulse, that hand lifted — but she stopped herself and exerted control. She gave him a small smile instead. "You've come so far. I know sometimes it seems like the road is endless —"

"It always seems endless."

Sakura sighed softly, still smiling sadly. "I know. But… I don't care how long it takes or what I have to do. I'm going to get your life back. You'll be a shinobi again, even if it's the last thing I do."

Neji's gaze flickered over to her, before averting once more.

Sakura finished the rest of her work within the next hour and a half, and as she was finishing up, Ino's suggestions popped once more into her head. But with medical ninjutsu and Neji's health journey also on her mind, she put two and two together and suddenly an idea formed. "Say — I've got an idea, if you're willing to hear it," she said, medical chakra drifting slowly down his leg. Once she had his attention, the pinkette continued. "I… there is an event I'm going to in Sunagakure. Now, I know we've only done walks around the village — and you've done very well with those, I might add — but I think it would be an excellent challenge for you to travel a longer distance. I'd be with you every step of the way and we'd go at your pace. What… what do you think, Neji-san?"

He considered for a long moment, brows furrowing as he mulled things over in his head. "What 'event' are you speaking of?"

Sakura's cheeks flushed with heat. She hesitated, unsure how to answer. "Well, ahh… it's the anniversary of a friend of mine," the pinkette finally admitted.

She finished up, and after slipping his top back on, Neji stood and grabbed his cane. Immediately he began heading for the door, and Sakura followed after, suddenly feeling unreasonably anxious. Turning back to her, the Hyuga said, "I'll consider it."

The kunoichi nodded, opening the door for him to allow him out. "And, Sakura-san?" he turned back once more and the pinkette looked up at him with large green eyes. Neji's expression was soft, much softer than she'd seen it in a long time. "Thank you."

When he left, Sakura suddenly found herself letting out a breath she hadn't known she'd been holding. Closing the door, she leaned back against it for a moment, catching her breath — and then she went over to the nearby desk and pulled a crumpled letter from it.