Italics: Character Thoughts
"You were too strong… Saitama," muttered Lord Boros, the dominator of the universe, as the ship went down.
Saitama walked away from the remains of the alien's corpse slowly, his mind full of thoughts. He sighed. He knew that the alien was strong, probably the strongest he ever faced. But he still didn't feel a thing. Not a single drop of emotion. Saitama clenched his teeth.
At least I gave him a fight. He seemed pretty happy. I sorta wished we switched places.
Suddenly, the ship gave a jolt. The enormous spacecraft was about to fall.
Better get inside the ship.
Saitama found a hole and jumped inside. The endless purple walls were trembling as the spaceship sunk into the ground. Saitama's thoughts quickly went to his poor suit. After all, Boros completely tore his beautiful white cape. He sat in silence and waited for the massive hull to land on the ground.
BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP!
Saitama woke up with a start. He rubbed his eyes and yawed.
Huh? Was that a dream? I thought I was actually fighting… uh... that alien Boar boy or something. I think I was falling down a spaceship...
He reached for the remote control and turned on the TV. He sat up on his futon and watched the news quietly.
"Hello citizens! I'm Tsumago, and I will report today's daily news. We will have our Hero Association Test today. Always very exciting! I wonder if there will be any new S-Class after today's test! What do you think, Itsuki?"
"I think the chances are very slim, but who knows?"
Didn't I just take the test? Why would they offer the test so quickly after?
"Saitama Sensei!" Genos shouted from out the door.
"Wait, Genos. Don't you live here? Did you go for a walk?" Saitama responded, scratching his bald head.
"No, sensei! I'm afraid I don't. Remember, you promised that I would be your disciple if we both took the hero test!"
"Wait! We already took it. What's going on-?"
"We have not. We are scheduled to take it today. I must now take my leave. I will see you there, sensei!"
"Hold on! What's the date?" Saitama yelled as he leaped for the door.
Unfortunately, Genos was already soaring up in the air, excited to finally be Saitama's disciple.
Damn it! What is going on?! Did I sign up for a Hero Association Test Retake or something? If so, I think I forgot. Maybe Genos was too upset with my rank.
Saitama was completely confused. He quickly put on his oppai hoodie and headed out to the testing area.
Saitama arrived a couple minutes later. He saw a line form in front of the massive dome structure. Security guards were lined up on the sides, and a Hero Association flag waved proudly.
After Saitama was checked in, he was guided into a classroom where a man with glasses proctored the test.
Hm… I think last time I failed the written examination. I should try a bit harder this time.
Question 1: Why do you want to be a hero?
Question 2: Why do you think you have qualities that make you a hero? This is the essay portion. Please give a nice, detailed description here.
Question 3: Who is the founder of the Hero Association?
Question 4: What is your most distinguished feat?
Question 5: What are the different threat levels
Question 6: What can you contribute to the Hero Association?
30 minutes later
Saitama's new answers:
Question 1: Why do you want to be a hero?
I'm a hero for fun.
Question 2: Why do you think you have qualities that make you a hero? This is the essay portion. Please give a nice, detailed description here.
I am strong. I have a cool suit
Question 3: Who is the founder of the Hero Association?
The hell do I know
Question 4: What is your most distinguished feat?
I killed some alien that came from a big spaceship. He said his name was Boar Boy or something. I also stopped the House of Evolution. I killed a big bug.
Question 5: What are the different threat levels in ascending order
I think there is a bug-tier, a lion-tier, a devil-tier and some bird-tier.
Question 6: What can you contribute to the Hero Association?
I am strong, so I can defeat monsters easily.
I think I did pretty good. I think adding that part about the bug guy will increase the score of my written portion. I didn't put that there last time.
Saitama was then guided into the physical portion. He stripped to his underwear inside the locker room and waited patiently until his first event, oblivious to the group of burly men laughing at his somewhat lean physique.
"LATERAL JUMPS! 30 SECONDS!"
Saitama's eyes narrowed. Suddenly, everyone stared at him as he began creating countless after-images just from the speed of his sideways jumps, creating an intense shock wave that shattered the glass around the stadium.
"1500 METER DASH! GO!"
Saitama circled the track in an instant, his legs exerting so much force onto the ground that it shook violently.
"WEIGHTLIFTING!"
The bald hero easily lifted the massive barbell up with one arm, while the other's couldn't even make it budge.
"VERTICAL JUMP!"
Saitama's head reached the roof, his foot leaving a gigantic print on the floor as a result of jumping so high.
"PUNCHING MACHINE!"
Saitama lightly brushed his knuckles to the machine, sending it flying all the way to the other room.
"WHACK-A-MOLE!"
Saitama knocked each and every one of them. By the end of his stellar banging, all the moles were gone.
The room was in awe. Never had they seen such a splendid performance. Without question, many believed that Saitama deserved at least a B-Class rank. The group of ripped men who were teasing Saitama scattered, realizing just how weak they were.
Saitama went back to the locker room and slipped back into his Oppai hoodie when the loudspeaker made an announcement.
"Would the applicants Genos and Saitama please head to the meeting room in Hall 4. The Hero Association would like to ask you both a few questions. Thank you,"
Wait, why me? Last time I didn't get an interview. Huh…
Saitama walked over to the locker rooms and put on his oppai hoodie. He then checked the map to see where Hall 4 was.
Shit. I don't know where Hall 4 is. I wish Genos was here so he could guide me. If I can't find the room in 10 minutes, I'll just skip it.
Fate had it, surprisingly, that he would manage to find it. He walked into the large meeting room and took a seat next to Genos, who was already there.
Wait, didn't Genos get an upgrade? Why are his arms the same as before?
"Sensei! Do you perhaps know the reason why we were called to an interview?"
"Uh... didn't you have an interview last time we took this test?"
"We have never taken this test before, Sensei!"
"Yeah we did. I'm a B-Class and you're a S-Class."
"I'm absolutely certain this has never happened before, sensei. We discussed taking this test only a few days ago."
Saitama scratched his shiny head in confusion. Is Genos pulling a prank on me? That's out of his character, though.
"Wait. Was there a purple alien spaceship that destroyed City A yesterday?" Saitama asked.
"No, sensei!"
Ok. Did I go back in time or something? Something is definitely fishy.
"Sensei, why are you asking-?"
"Greetings, Saitama and Genos. Please excuse us for being late. Hopefully, you both don't mind if we ask you a series of questions?," a young man walking in asked.
Three others followed from behind and took a seat behind the long desk in front of Genos and Saitama. The man with the glasses pulled out two files, one with a picture of Genos and the other containing a picture of Saitama.
"Ok, let's cut to the chase," the man said. He took out a picture of the destroyed base of the House of Evolution.
"The Hero Association has been looking into this confidential group for a couple months now. Saitama, I know you claimed to have destroyed the House of Evolution in your written test. Were you the one who destroyed this canyon?"
"No, it was Genos," Saitama casually replied.
"Then why did you say you destroyed the House of Evolution when it was Genos that destroyed their base?"
"That's not their real base. They were secretly operating underground. When we reached inside, some bug that claimed he was the pinnacle of evolution or something turned Genos into modern art, so I got mad and I eventually killed the bug. I remember this day specifically because I almost missed an important sale," the caped baldy answered boldly.
"And Genos, is this all true? Were you defeated by the bug monster?"
"Correct. I was not strong enough to face such a formidable opponent. I am ashamed to admit I forced Saitama sensei to expend his precious energy to assist me!"
"Thank you. That will be all. You may now leave and wait for your results in the locker room."
"Er, hold on. I want to ask you guys something. Are you sure we aren't already registered with the Hero Association?" Saitama asked.
"No, we are certain. We never had such outstanding results for the physical examinations. You are the first one."
"Ok, I'll be leaving then. Genos, let's go."
"Yes, sensei!"
Yeah, I definitely went back in time then. I wonder how, though...
"Sensei! I just received my results. Apparently, I am now S-Class, Rank 17, just like you predicted.
"Oh, I haven't checked mine yet. Let me take a look."
Saitama opened the envelope and was absolutely surprised by his rank.
"That's weird. I got S-Class, Rank 18 even though I got a score of 71 again," Saitama said.
"I will file a complaint to the superiors. How dare they place Saitama sensei in the bottom rank of S-Class?!"
"NO! THAT'S TOO EMBARRASSING!" Saitama yelped abruptly. "Besides, I'm happy as long as I don't get those annoying weekly quotas."
"Sensei, can I read your paper?"
"Sure..."
Genos took the paper from Saitama's hands and began scanning the details.
"Genos. What's wrong?"
"Master, it appears that you won't be paid the same as an S-Class. They are still doubting your abilities! The nerve of those men. I shall incinerate those fools."
Shit… Now I can never move out of my apartment
"Then how much are they willing to pay me?"
"The paper says you will be paid the same as a B-Class hero, but if you prove your strength, they may increase it later."
Sounds like way too much work. Oh, well. I guess B-Class payment is enough for now.
"Will applicants Genos and Saitama please head to Hall 3 at 16:00 for the hero seminar? Thank you," the loudspeaker announced.
"Let's go, sensei!"
"Sure..."
"Congratulations on passing." Sneck said.
Yeah yeah yeah. I remember this guy. He's gonna try to rookie crush me later. This is gonna be boring.
Saitama popped a piece of gum in his mouth and began chewing it obnoxiously, showing his bright white teeth in the process. A vein popped on Sneck's face, angry that the bald idiot wasn't paying attention to him at all. A bead of sweat trickled down his face as he glared intensely at Saitama, who was too busy thinking about dinner.
"One of you got through on a fluke. Work hard so your good luck doesn't go to waste!" Sneck growled. "But don't get cocky! From now on, you must live as befit heroes! Your faces will be on the Hero Association's official website!" Sneck continued.
Saitama chose that exact moment to blow a huge bubble. Sneck's eyes began to narrow. He had enough of the bald hero's arrogance.
"Are you listening? Your clueless mug will be all over the country! Unless you want to incur the shame..." Sneck jumped up and showed his finesse, striking the air and displaying his form as a martial artist. "Aim to be a magnificent hero like me!"
Unfortunately for Sneck, Saitama lost interest in Sneck's speech thousands of years ago. He blew a bubble so large, it completely covered his face, prompting Genos to help Saitama out.
"Class A Heroes have some influence over the association. But numbskulls can lose points and ranks at any time. Remember that!"
I heard this seminar already. I wonder what's going to happen now that I've traveled back time? Guess I gotta roll with it.
Later, after the seminar, Genos decided it would be advantageous to remind Saitama that he would be Saitama's disciple.
"Sensei! The world will now recognize us heroes. Now you can operate with your head held high. And now, I am officially your pupil. I am looking forward to your lessons!"
Ah shit! I forgot about that. Why did I even promise him that in the first place? And in some time, he's going to ask to live with me.
Genos departed from his master, leaving Saitama to collect his own thoughts.
[Somewhere else]
"Those two newbies today… Did they really pass? Their altitude was horrible! I'm Class A, Rank 38, and they didn't know me. They also seemed ignorant of how harsh the world is. The amateurs!" Sneck complained while sipping his coffee. "They'll die in no time!"
"No… Genos passed both written and physical tests with perfect scores. We haven't seen such a feat in 2 years. He jumped straight to S Class. It's outstanding for a newcomer," the man with the glasses explained, resulting in a shocked expression from Snake's face.
"And while Saitama's written test and essay were dreadful, he scored a perfect in the physical examination. He absolutely smashed all records of the physical test. Normally, because he scraped by with 71 points, we would give him bottom C class. However, according to Genos, Saitama was able to defeat a monster that turned him into "modern art". Therefore, we decided to promote him to S-Class as well. But, since he scored so low on the written examinations, we are cutting his pay until he proves he is strong enough," the man with the glasses continued.
How dare that bald bastard ascend me in rank. I'm going to crush him.
Meanwhile, Saitama was walking by a clear, blue lake, deep in his thoughts.
Wow, I can't believe I traveled back in time. Now that I'm an S-Class, does that mean I'm going to get a fan-club like Genos will? Also, isn't that rookie crusher going to come soon?
"Let's continue the seminar!" came Sneck's voice.
Yep, there he is.
"In this business, we- !"
"-crush newbies. Yeah, I know. Can we get on with it?" Saitama interrupted, picking his ear.
"Even now you still show disrespect to me. I don't care that you're an S-Class! I'm going to prove that I'm much more powerful than you, and they will definitely increase my rank. So prepared to be-!"
Poor Sneck didn't even get a chance to finish when suddenly Saitama uppercut him in the chin, sending him flying until he hit a bush.
Oh, well. Time to go back and cook dinner. If I remember correctly, I have to go to a mountain tomorrow and let Genos try to hit me. What a day that's going to be…
"As it stands, I am S-Class rank 17 and you are S-Class rank 18, sensei. For now, the Hero Association lists us as Genos and Saitama, but at some point we will acquire our hero names."
"Gosh, I hope it's not Caped Baldy again… Hey, do you know if we can choose our own hero names?"
"The only way is to change your appearance into something that's more befitting to what you desire."
"That's too much work."
"I see. Saitama sensei's training regime must take too much of his time. Anyways, thank you for granting my request today."
"Yeah, because you're now my student. I'll walk over there to put some distance in between us."
Saitama walked a couple meters away, and gave the signal that he was ready.
Genos, taking the hint, took a stance and began to transfer the energy from his core all over his body. Suddenly, he shot from the ground and flew to Saitama with incredible speed, doing a flying side kick to Saitama's head. Saitama, in turn, simply dodged.
As quick as a bullet, Genos turned around and promptly attempted a round-house kick, lighting spewing all over his body. Saitama just ducked. Genos, seeing an opportunity, executed an axe-kick. However, Saitama moved away and Genos kicked the ground with so much force, it broke the ground to shreds and created an explosion that sent Saitama floating in the sky.
Genos aimed his arm at where Saitama was, and shot a beam of energy from his hand, which missed Saitama and instead blew a massive hole in the canyon.
Saitama landed carefully, a few meters away from Genos, relieved that his cape was still intact. Genos was getting frustrated. Even after pouring so much energy into his engines, he still wasn't fast enough to even touch Saitama.
Saitama, feeling slightly bad for Genos, decided he would allow Genos to hit him once. While Genos was powering up his core, Saitama took off his cape and placed it on the ground, afraid that Genos would burn it.
After adding the most amount of energy he could muster into his engine, he accelerated so fast he vanished from thin air, and used his Machine Gun Blows, consecutively punching Saitama on the side of the canyon, each blow strong enough to tear giant pieces of mountain off.
After stopping to check the damage, Genos realized that Saitama had already vanished. He was certain that he landed some blows to Saitama, but he was gone.
Have I been chasing his after-image the entire time? Where is sensei?
Genos used his robotic eyes to detect sudden movement, and after a couple seconds, he managed to find Saitama jogging around. Without thinking, Genos rushed right in front of Saitama, took out every blaster and gun he could unload out of his arms, and fired a gigantic blast directly at Saitama.
A dead-on hit! Now maybe master will take me more seriously now!
However, after firing for a minute straight, Genos began to run out of energy.
Where is sensei? Did I really incinerate him? I need to stop the blast!
When the blast cleared, Genos saw nothing but Saitama's cape on the ground.
Where did Sensei go? This is not good. I shouldn't have fired on him!
Suddenly, however, his sensei popped up right in front of Genos' face. Genos, caught completely off-guard, instinctively did a round-house kick, but Saitama disappeared behind him.
Saitama's eyes glowed, his aura so intimidating that Genos thought Saitama was towering over him. Saitama raised his fist, and punched in the direction of Genos' face, stopping right in front of it.
The sky split, and the shockwave of the punch alone toar the entire canyon apart. Genos, in complete awe, stared at the damage as Saitama urged him to go so they could eat at the udon restaurant.
Man I can't get enough of this udon. I think I came here last time I fought with Genos. If I remember correctly, I think some dude with blue hair is going to come to rookie crush Genos.
The caped hero stared at his bowl of udon. He somewhat recalled the last time he was here. He was still completely mind-blown that Genos could finish that huge bucket of udon. He was also feeling up to a rematch with.
"Hey, Genos. Do you want to do that spicy udon challenge?"
"If you desire to compete with me, I shall pamper your wishes."
"Ok, let's do it then."
Saitama, however, much to his surprise, lost yet again. Genos was draining the rest of the bucket unfazed whilst Saitama rested his head on the table, a udon noodle sticking out of one of his nostrils.
I shouldn't have done that….
Suddenly, the door opened, and a man with blue hair walked inside.
Yeah. that's the newbie-crusher. Gotta tell Genos.
"Genos, I'm warning you. This guy is a rookie-crusher. He's here to fight you!"
"I understand, sensei! I shall use this opportunity to warm down from our spar and incinerate him."
For some reason, everyone in the restaurant was gushing over the man. The ladies were star-struck and going crazy for him. Much to everyone's surprise, he walked over to Saitama's table.
"I take it you guys are Genos and Saitama. I would like a word with both of you," the blue-haired man said.
Last time, he called only Genos out. Does he want to crush me too now that I'm S-Class?
"Do not casually speak to Saitama Sensei. He is too busy attempting to digest the noodles to fight with you. I shall face you instead," Genos replied menacingly.
"I assure you, that's not the reason I am here. May we please step outside?" he said amusingly.
"I said Saitama Sensei is-!"
"It's ok, Genos. Let's see what he has to say."
Reluctantly, Genos got up off his chair and followed the blue haired man and his master outside.
"What do you want, uh… what's your name?" Saitama asked.
"You don't know who I am?" he seemed surprised, as if he expected everyone to know his name. "I'm Amai Mask, the Class-A Rank 1 hero."
"Answer Saitama Sensei's question! Why did you disrupt sensei's precious dinner time?"
"So you really are Saitama's disciple." The hero smirked. "I take it that he's stronger than you, than."
"Sensei is many leagues stronger than both you and me," Genos angrily retorded.
"Now, now. It's fine to be hot-headed at times but don't ever address me with that disrespect. After all, it was me who allowed both of you to advance to S-Class," Sweet Mask responded chillingly.
"What do you want?" Saitama inquired, already bored.
"Just wanted to welcome you both into the industry."
"How?"
"By visiting you."
"Yeah, but you could've just sent us an email or something. Isn't that a waste of time?"
"Do you really have to be so unappreciative? After all, I did take the time to drive all the way here to meet both of you," Amai masked smiled silkily.
"Is that all?" Genos said impatiently.
Amai Mask walked by Genos and put his head close to Genos' ear.
"Watch out, cyborg. The next time we meet I won't be so courteous." Amai mask muttered quietly.
Amai Mask then promptly walked ahead into the dark, with Genos glowering in his direction.
"Genos, come on. Let's split the bill, man."
"Yes, sensei!"
Both men went back to their table and prepared to pay. A group of women approached their table soon afterwards.
"Excuse me, but are both of you friends with Amai Mask?" one of them inquired.
Saitama and Genos just stared at them, not wanting to respond.
"Can you both please shake my hand?" one of them squealed.
Saitama and Genos decided to humor them, and extended their hands so all of them could grasp it.
"Hey Genos, is that guy… uh… Ant Mask… famous?"
"According to the information I have on the Hero Association, he is a famous singer, actor, dancer, and hero."
"Oh. Does he have a fan club or something?"
"He has hundreds of fan clubs across the nation, apparently. Not of any importance. Sensei can easily gain more with his strength."
No thanks. Having that many is just creepy.
"Alright, Genos. I need to go home now. I'm too tired."
"Yes, sensei! I shall take my leave as well."
A/N: Thanks for making it to the end guys. I'm relatively new to writing fan fiction, so if you have any thoughts, I would love to hear them. Criticism and suggestions are also welcome. Also, both psychic sisters will make their debut next chapter, so please stay tuned for that.