How It Ends
She finishes the last prayer as she finishes the sign of the cross and watches the last of the fire die away, the grey smoke rising, and the heat had long since gone from the cooling ash and embers, she can remember sitting in front of the fire in her own chambers back in France, she misses how life was back then, back when she was young, back when Lola and Aylee were alive, when she had Francis to hold her and love her, when he was alive and well, before they were King and Queen of France, when things were so much simpler.
"M'lady it's time."
She smiles sadly as her Lady-in-Waiting, Jane Kennedy, starts to cry, it's 7:50am she knows she will not see 8:01am, she's finished her Will, her letters, the issuing of her things to her Ladies-in-Waiting and the rest of her Household and the last letter to the King of France with her last goodbye included to Catherine de' Medici, she's so tired she can feel it in her bones.
"Jane do not weep, I go to Our Lord gladly and I know in his arms I will be free, he is a kind loving God and in the warm loving embrace I will find peace. Do not weep, your father as one of the eight Commissioners saw my greatest moment when I married my only true love, Francis the Dauphin of France in Notre Dame de Paris and you shall see my last, take heart child, this is the end of all my troubles."
Mary said as she was helped into her garments and veil, her hands were sure and never shook but Jane, poor Jane she could feel the girl trembling at her mistress's fate, she knew Kenna and Greer were safe, Greer had found love in Scotland and Kenna was still in the Kingdom of Imereti and was happy, how she missed both her friends, it's been very long these past 18 years to be without her son or her friends but she's endured and she knows there are many that hate her for it.
"In manus tuas, Domine, commendo spiritum meum."
Into thy hands, O Lord, I commend my spirit.
Mary says softly as she picks up her cross and holds it in her right hand and has her Latin prayer book in the left and the rosary that is around her right wrist was the one Rose had given her when she left the convent all those years ago to rejoin life at the French Court of King Henry II, she's kept it close to her all these years; she was silent as she walked with Jane behind her, she was trying to tamper down her crying but the girl wasn't doing that well of a job, towards the Great Hall in Fotheringhay Castle and knew her well worn shoes would never walk the halls again nor would they grace the feet of another, she knew the sight that was going to greet her but it doesn't bother her, she's seen so much death, murder and executions in her life none of it bothers her and she steels herself ready to face the last things she will take in with her mortal eyes while here in this mortal flesh.
"Protegas me, Domine Deus meus et refugium meum in te."
Protect me, O God, in you is my refuge
Mary says in a voice no louder then a whisper, not even Jane heard it behind her and she knows the only one to have heard her was the one who she would see soon, she makes the sign of the cross as she can see the scaffold which can't be more then two feet from the ground, covered in a thick black linen and the block where her head will be cut off stands in the middle like a morbid statue atop a hill watching over the space below, it looms large as she slowly walks closer, she can see the stools for the Earls of Shrewsbury and Kent to sit on but right now they are standing waiting for her to mount the scaffold.
"There is a cushion for you to kneel upon."
The executioner says as he gives her his hand and helps her climb the three steps up to the platform, he also helps Jane for her feet want to lose their path and surly her knees are weak, how very kind, she knows the Earls can't wait to see her head in the basket and for the bells to toll spreading the news across the land that Mary Stuart is dead.
"I ask for your forgiveness m'lady Mary Stuart, once Queen of Scotland."
The man asked as he knelt before her for a moment as she was nearer the block, she can see the embroidered cushion meant for her knees and the basket that will catch her head, before rising as he awaits her answer, she can only see his eyes under his black hood, she doesn't look at the axe resting now against his side, his leather gloved hands or the shine of the newly cleaned axe as the sun hits it for a few seconds as he shifts on his feet before shifting again, the sun is gone, waiting on her to speak.
"I forgive you with all my heart, for now, I hope, you shall make an end of all my troubles."
She says as Jane steps forward sniffling and she is trying to stop her crying as she starts to unfasten the cloak that covers Mary, Jane is helped by the executioner and Mary keeps her hold on the items in her hands letting them both work the cloak from her body, she can hear Jane let out a shaky breath and is glad this isn't Greer her dear friend she wouldn't deserve this.
"My sir I have not ever had such grooms the likes of you, nor have I not taken off my clothes before such a company."
She says lightly with a smile hoping it helps lift the sprits of her Lady-in-Waiting and that of her executioner, for he does have such a ghastly job, no one makes as if they have heard her, but she knows if Francis had heard he'd have laughed, the low mumbles coming from those present make it up to the people on the scaffold and Mary doesn't smile but she feels lighter as they take in the red of her petticoat and the bellowing sleeves that cover her arms in crimson, the colour of martyrdom in the Catholic Church that everyone here will understand, with a black satin bodice and black trimmings and her hair which is in a bun atop her head can be seen clearly after her veil is removed.
"Protegas me, Domine Deus meus et refugium meum in te. I put my trust in you My Lord."
Protect me, O God, in you is my refuge
She says it again a bit louder, the Earl's sound tired of waiting.
"Protegas me, Domine Deus meus et refugium meum in te."
Protect me, O God, in you is my refuge
She's not scared of the pain the axe's blade with deliver to her with what she hopes is one fatal blow but knows it will likely be more or of dying, she's not scared for the unknown ahead of her, she's glad to be finished with it all and finally get some rest, she feels older then she is and knows how truly unkept she feels but made sure not to show it as she made sure to dress and do her hair nicely this morning, she will truly meet her maker as put together as one in her situation can be; Jane covers her eyes with the white cloth veil with gold stitching and fastens it behind her head, Mary recites the Latin prayers that calm her and give her strength in her head, she knows the Lord made her strong enough to make it through this as she kneels and feel the cushion under her.
"I put my trust in you My Lord."
She gropes in front of her blindly for the block that will be her end and finds it easily, Jane's crying is getting louder but she's walking away and down the scaffold steps, will people look away or will they watch closely to be able to recount every detail of this morning's dreadful entertainment to whoever that will listen to them, resting her chin where she is supposed to she lightly holds the block and takes a breath, she slowly stretches out her arms making sure they do not shake as she keeps still and is sure she feels the air shift as the axe is raised; the first blow hits the back of her head, and it is said she is still praying when the second blow strikes which severs her neck rendering her dead and then the executioner holds her severed head high above the bloody scaffold for the crowd to see and says God save the Queen, but Mary knows nothing of the pain of the axe missing it's mark meant to kill her swiftly in one blow nor the pain of the second strike which ends her life, the darkness turns to light and she can smell fresh air, clean linen, and she slowly starts to see something as she blinks clearing her vision and she feels her heart beating wildly in her chest as she can see Francis smiling beside her laying in their marriage bed in their chambers in the room she remembers so well back in France.
"Mary, Mary."
If this is her afterlife, then she is glad to be in it.
"Francis."
She feels her eyes grow watery as she smiles and rolls onto her side to face him, this can't be a trick she can smell him, this must be real, her chest feels tight and she wants to sob, she wants to scream, she's happy, she's sad, she's so confused she's empty until he speaks again.
"I've been waiting for you."
She's missed him so much and those soft words are almost enough to make the tears fall down her face that she's fighting to keep at bay but the love that takes over the empty feeling makes her feel warm, she lost him to soon into their marriage, the years after that heart-breaking day were hard to get by without him, she doesn't know how she did it but she did and she hopes he's proud of her, she's back with him and she'll never lose him again, the first kiss they share right here makes her feel like they've never been parted and this isn't how it ends, for her this is how it begins.