AN: This is my first completed Teen Wolf fic. Yaay! It was written for Just Write's Discord Fluff Bingo. In these times we all need a little bit of fluff in our lives. I hope you all are staying safe and healthy. I hope you enjoy this fic as much as I enjoyed writing it!
Stiles the Kid-napper
"What is that?" Peter drawled eyebrows arched. He watched as Stiles' eyes snapped to the squirming bundle under his arm and then casually held up his drink.
"Uhhh a smoothie?" Peter was not amused, his jaw clenched tight.
"Try again."
"Ooooh you're talking about my shirt? Yeah, Me and Scott had this huge chili dog eating contest! I may have won but my shirt kinda took a beating. I'm sorry, I know how much sloppiness offends you." Peter could feel his eyebrow twitch as he watched Stiles scratch at the dried chili stain. That was never going to come out.
Peter knew Stiles well enough that the younger man would just keep beating around the bush if he didn't press the issue. "Stiles, what is that animal doing in my home?"
"Oh. You mean..." Peter could practically hear the false casualness to his tone. "This is Goatzart. He's kinda staying with me for a lil bit." Stiles holds up the wriggling baby goat and Peter had to stop himself from stepping back in disgust. "Isn't he just the cutest!" The things tongue flopped out and it dared to stare into his soul all mournful and wide eyed. Peter knew that trick. He's seen Isaac pull that when he wanted belly rubs while he was a wolf. He was not going to fall for that again.
"Why do you have a goat in-" "Goatzart!" Peter couldn't stop the sigh that was released from his lungs even if he wanted to. "Why do you have Goatzart in my home?" He really didn't think werewolves could get migraines (being a born were he would know), but Stiles always was the exception. It would be this infuriating boy that would cause pain in a supernatural being.
"Well where else would I take him?" Stiles looked up at him, his pouty amber eyes all wide, eerily matching the goats and Peter suddenly had a horrible feeling deep down into his stomach.
"Oh no! You are not keeping that thing in my clean upscale apartment. Who knows how many fleas-" Peter closed his eyes as he heard Stiles gasp and subsequently cover the goat's ears as if Peter offended the damn thing.
"Peter! How could you say that about Goatzart!" Peter watched as Stiles scritched at the goat's ears supposedly soothing the poor thing. "He doesn't have any fleas! The petting z-" Stiles scathing tone dropped off as he realized what he was going to say, but it was too late. Peter had heard everything.
"Please do not tell me that you stole a goat-" "Goatzart!" Stiles stressed, holding the goat tighter to him. "Stole Goatzart from the petting zoo. You do know your father would be disappointed to have to arrest his only son, yes?" Peter mocked as he took in the small black and white goat crushed to Stiles' chest. "And let the poor thing breathe."
Stiles reluctantly let the goat go, setting it down on the floor behind and away from Peter as if he would snatch the flea-infested menace and throw it out as soon as he could. Which was fair because he was sorely tempted.
"You don't understand! We have a bond! He jumped in my arms and practically begged me to bring him home!" Stiles turned, cooing and petting the goat. "Isn't that right my baby boy" Peter sighed. This was getting weirder by the minute.
"Okay, how about we start at the beginning. Why do you have a goat from the petting zoo?" Peter moved to sit on his plush couch, making sure to keep his distance from the goat. It was making these little bleating baahing sounds and Peter certainly didn't want to catch whatever diseases it obviously had.
Stiles looked to the goat, apparently deeming it fine enough to be left to its own devices. Which meant that it was currently hopping around in circles trying to bite at the speckles of light coming off from his living room window. Yep, something was definitely wrong with that goat.
"I already told you about mine and Scott's chili dog contest." Peter waved his hands around in a 'get to it' motion. He already heard this part. Stiles huffed and plopped down onto the couch, stretching out so their sides touched. This boy was something else. He had to stop the small smile that wanted to spread across his face. He had a goat in his apartment, more important matters!
"Obviously we had to exercise off the food, so we went to the zoo!" Stiles snuggled deeper into Peter's side and he was tempted to wrap his arms around the limpet. "They have different trails and all the animals are in separate areas so there's a lot of walking. It was the perfect choice for some best bro-bonding!"
Peter gave in, throwing an arm over his back hugging the smaller man, after Stiles smushed his face closer to his neck. The tension that was slowly fading snapped back into place, right between his shoulder blades, when the goat tried to jump onto his couch, trying to stuff itself in-between the two of them like it thought it belonged there. Peter let a subvocal growl scare the animal back to the floor. This was his Stiles. That mangey animal could get his own.
Peter felt the smack to his arm and scowled as Stiles picked up the shivering thing and settled it on his other side. He glared at it as he continued the conversation. "So you were at the petting zoo. Then what?"
Stiles stroked at the fur on the goat's side, rubbing a black patched ear. "We saw some foxes and hyenas. Scott thought he heard a wolf, but it just turned out to be a werewolf couple making out behind the nacho stand. He was so embarrassed, as if he wasn't caught in worse places with Allison. I'm still scarred from-"
"Stiles please...the goat?"
"I'm getting there!" Stiles blurted out and then much quieter, "Don't get your panties in a bunch." Peter took that opening as a chance to purr into the younger man's ear making him flush. "You know I don't wear anything of that sort, dear boy."
It took a few extra minutes for Stiles to continue speaking, but it was well worth it to watch his skin grow warm, moles and freckles blending with his embarrassment. "We saw a sign that said that we could feed some baby animals and you know how Scott gets around the puppies and kittens at Deaton's." Stiles mumbled into his hands. Peter pulled the lithe fingers away from his face wanting to see Stiles' reaction to his words. They may not be together yet, but if Stiles kept this up, it was only a matter of time. He could only hold back so much.
"Well, we had to go and feed them, right? There were some baby sheep and a donkey," Since his hands were still held tightly within Peter's, Stiles turned his face and spoke into his shoulder. "There were even some ducks. There was also this little guy!" Stiles perked up, his shyness fading and excitement bubbling up within him as he clutched the baby goat and brought it so it was in-between them. Damn thing got what it wanted after all.
Peter scowled though he let the animal be. If it damaged his sofa, it won't be him who's going to buy himself a new one. Stiles cuddled Goatzart, nuzzling his face and poking at its little horns.
"He ran away from Scott after he tried to feed him a carrot and he jumped into my arms!" Stiles continued to coo at the small animal. "He looked into my heart and soul and begged me to bring him home. So I smuggled him under my jacket when the zookeeper wasn't looking and Scott played lookout."
Stiles pat his stomach and Peter could see the mischief in his eyes. "I apparently can play a very convincing pregnant person even though I am in fact an 18-year-old man." Peter huffed out a laugh and watched as Stiles turned to look adoringly at the baby goat.
"Have you looked into his eyes! How can I say no to them!" Stiles looked back up to Peter pleadingly, slightly tilting the goats head up as well so he was staring into two sets of amber eyes. Peter sighed, defeated.
"Okay so that's why you have Goatzart, but my original question still stands. What's it doing in my apartment?" The question was asked much softer. He shouldn't be giving in so easily, but well, it will always be hard to say no to his boy.
"Well if dad gets a call about a missing goat from the petting zoo, and since he knew Scott and I were going there, he would totally suspect it was me." Stiles gave a self-deprecating smile, he knew he was a troublemaker and the first one his father would suspect in a small town such as Beacon Hills. "And since you let me stay over here sometimes...I thought that maybe..." Stiles shrugged his shoulders mumbling and looked down at Goatzart to hide the flush of pink on his face, rubbing his hand down its flank.
Peter sighed, one hand reaching out gently to cup at the boy's jaw, lifting it up so Stiles would meet his eyes. The other curled softly around Stiles' wrist, tightening ever so gently. "I thought I told you already it's because I like you Stiles, that farm animal on the other hand…"
Peter stared at Stiles' stunned expression, really him liking Stiles should have been obvious. He doesn't just let anyone into his home or crowd him to death on the couch. "Stiles, Goatzart has to go back to the petting zoo. He has all his food and toys and probably even his parents there. Wouldn't you feel depressed if you were kidnapped away from the Sheriff? Think how this little cretin would feel." Peter forced himself to pet the animal and nearly snatched his hand back as it started to wiggle in happiness. Eugh.
Peter knew using the Sheriff against Stiles wouldn't win him any points, but the goat had to go and that meant getting Stiles to admit that he can't keep the damn thing so it wouldn't fall back on him.
Stiles picked up Goatzart and looked into its golden eyes. Peter saw the indecision on his face and knew he had to do or say something to sway it in his favor even if it wasn't technically true.
"Stiles, I am sorry, but Goatzart can not stay here. My apartment has a no pets policy." Peter settled his hand on Stiles' shoulder, rubbing the stiff muscle that he found there.
Stiles cuddled Goatzart and set him back on the ground to play with his silk Persian rug. "Fine, okay! We can call my dad and have him take Goatzart back home. He can say an officer or good samaritan found him wandering outside or something." Stiles took out his phone and as Peter saw him only taking pictures of Goatzart he decided he should take goat removal into his own hands.
"Good evening Sheriff, you wouldn't happen to have a case about a missing goat from the local petting zoo perchance?" Stiles pouted at him from the couch betrayal clearly seen in those honey eyes of his. Apparently taking pictures wasn't the only thing he was doing on the phone. How Stiles found his leasing policy, he would never know. That was a private, legal document.
Peter could hear the Sheriff letting out a pained sigh. "Don't tell me. How about I hang up before-"
Goatzart lets out a loud scream over the Sheriff's question and Peter had to scowl down at the animal, his eyes narrowing, just this side of electric blue. Was that his $200 loafer in the goat's mouth?! The smug look on Stiles' face told him everything.
"Come get this creature off my hands before that blasted zoo has to explain to the little kiddies why Goatzart is in pieces." Peter growled into the phone hanging up when he heard the Sheriff turn on the sirens of his squad car.
"Oh come on Peter...Goatzart is teething. It's not his fault." Stiles teased a sly smile crossing his face. The boy was now down on the ground wiggling his loafer in the air above the goat's head like it was some kind of cheap chew toy.
The sheriff couldn't come fast enough.
"Peter...were you jealous of a goat?" Stiles' tone was incredulous and Peter scowled at the door where the Sheriff and that homewrecker just left.
Peter growled as Stiles crowded into his side, hugging him around his waist. "That's actually kind of...sweet." Stiles squeezed, continuing on. "If I knew all I had to do was bring a goat home to find out that you actually like-like me, I woulda done it a lot sooner!"
"Like-like...how…juvenile." It was Peter's turn to be incredulous. "Please do not bring any more filthy animals into my home."
"You don't gotta worry, you're the only filthy animal I need in my life." Stiles whispered against Peter's ear. He could feel the hot puff of breath; Stiles' hand teasingly soft against his thigh and how his eyes started to glow.