Zootopia Short Stories: Good Morning Yet Again
A BIG thank you to all the writers who stepped up with stories to entertain us and have given us some very needed distraction from the uncertain and fearful news that seems to dominate our lives these days. You have brought us some humor, much adventure, and a lot of mental comfort. You are a blessing to us all! Let's find out what Nick is up to this fine day.
Please keep up the good work!
OG
I do not own the rights to Zootopia or any of its characters. This story was written solely for the reader's enjoyment and without any profitable purposes. The story, all names, characters, and incidents portrayed in this story are fictitious.
The old goat scowled at the cell phone that he had tossed next to him on the sofa. He had heard that his nephew, who is now dubbed the 'Not So Smart Goat', had decided that he was invulnerable and had ventured from his dormitory at that other so-called university which is located in the town of Auburn, to spend his Spring Break along that stretch of the beach we loving call around here as the Redneck Rivera. He is still banished from the farm for the remainder of the fourteen days and is currently dwelling in the dank isolation of his mother's basement, well at least in his bedroom since she doesn't have a basement.
Heck, was I ever that dumb? Don't answer that!
After hearing that a healthcare union found a supplier who had 39 million much need medical masks just sitting in their warehouses, I decided to go check and see what I had in the basement. Young Goat had reminded me that I had stocked up supplies during Y2K and then again when the bird flu was coming, and yet again when SARS and then Ebola were supposed to kill us all. I found no masks, just a case of old MREs and some jugs of moonshine...Err...I meant medicine.
The virus came from afar and crippled the city with its illness. Even the valiant ZPD was not prepared and slowly the department issued medical masks to the few remaining cops who were able to keep working in an effort to keep the citizens safe during the mayor's mandated stay a home order.
"Maybe you can staple the edges? Here let me try!" the rabbit said as she reached toward the fox holding the oversized medical mask over his face. He swatted at the rabbit's paws as she tried to reach up and grasp the mask.
"Carrots, don't!" Nick protested as he pulled the mask off his face and frowned at it. "The department has stockpiled masks for every mammal on the force except for me!" he grumbled in anger. "Why do they think a fox can wear a mask which would fit a wolf?"
"Your nose is too pointy!" Officer Wolford snickered as he watched the fox once again try on the oversized mask. "Someone please go and find us a roll of duct tape, that'll make it fit."
"Yeah, sure Snifflesnout," Nick replied while giving the wolf one of his infamous smirks as he tossed the mask aside. "No thanks, I don't want to pull any of my gorgeous fur off when I remove the damn thing. I cannot believe that Purchasing never bought any medical-grade masks that would fit a fox, I've been working here for over two years!"
"It sure does suck to be you!" the large rhino next to him snorted as he gave the smaller police officer what could only pass as a smug look while he dangled a large mask on the end of his right hoof. "Do you want to borrow one of mine? It might just cover your whole head, including that smarttailed mouth of yours."
The fox looked up at the rhino with a grin. "Aw, gee McHorn I didn't know you loved me so much?" he sarcastically gushed out as he batted his eyes and pressed his paws across his chest. "You are willing to give up one of your precious masks for me, how sweet!"
The rhino just rolled his eyes and huffed out a chuckle.
"Snifflesnout?" a female tiger asked the timber wolf sitting in front of her. "Why did Wilde call you that?"
"Last month we were tracking down a suspect over in Sahara Square," Wolford began to explain. "It was evening and all those vendors had already put up their weekend stalls for the nightly bazaar. I was sniffing a perp's scent and…"
"He sniffed his way into a pile of red pepper flakes that someone had conveniently dropped on the ground in the middle of the scent trail!" Nick called out, cutting off the remainder of the wolf's explanation. "He sniffled and whined for the remainder of the evening, so I have dubbed him Officer Snifflesnout!"
Several of the surrounding officers chuckled at the fox's comments and Nick just gave the other canid yet another smirk.
"Hey wait! Didn't you two catch that purse snatcher?" the tiger asked.
"My dear Officer Stripes…" Nick began to explain.
"The name is Fangmeyer," the tiger growled. "Not stripes, no one calls us tiger stripes! That's like calling a bunny cute."
"Okay, I stand corrected," the fox replied in an amused tone. "We had a secret weapon, a rather cute one at that…" There was a soft thump and the fox yipped out "Ow!" as he rubbed where Judy had punched his arm.
"How many times have I told you not to call me cute?" Judy giggled.
"You want me to punch him for you?" Officer Fangmeyer asked as she gave the fox a rather predatory grin. "It would be my pleasure."
"Thank you, but I have mastered the art of finding the right spot to give him a poke," Judy replied as she gave the slightly cowering fox a smile.
"I'd like to give you a poke!" Nick softly grumbled back.
"I'm sure you would," the tigress laughed as she gave the fox a knowing wink.
"Not like that!" the fox objected.
"Sure fox!" Fangmeyer replied back as she made an obscene motion with her paws.
"Hey! That isn't funny!" Judy snapped out while she gave a scowl towards the tiger, but everyone could see that her ears were blushing.
"Ignore her," a tall elephant sitting beside the tigress sighed as she gave the smaller officer next to her a soft whack with her trunk. "She's close to that time of year, if you know what I mean? So continue your story."
"Hey!" Fangmeyer snapped back as she pushed the elephant's truck away. "I'm not that close."
"Thank you, Francine, for your timely intervention," Nick said with a grin. "Anyways, we had tracked the weasel into the market, but with all the spicy scents, we had lost his trail. Earlier we had put Carrots in one of the buildings above and she had a bead of the perp the whole time. With a little direction from above, we quickly were back on the trail…"
"Once you figured out which of your paws was your left paw," Judy giggled as she interrupted. "You went the wrong direction at first."
"You were facing us, so I thought you meant your left!" Nick huffed back. "Anyways, we finally caught up with…"
"Tennnnnhut!" Corporal Higgins commanded as he snapped to attention.
Chief Bogo bent over as he opened the door and entered into the room, immediately the officers began to make a ruckus as they pounded their desks. "All right, let's get to it!" the bull ordered as he held up his clipboard and slipped on his reading glasses. "Wilde, based out your informant's report we have a warrant to search that warehouse over on the eastside for hoarded medical supplies. Take Hopps, Wolford, and Fangmeyer with you and it better be something good like hospital masks or ventilators!"
"My source said it was something that is in very short supply which everyone needs," Nick cockily replied as he gave a halfhearted salute.
Half an hour later the officers had gathered near the warehouse's gate, it took just a few moments for Fangmeyer to cut the lock and with the warrant in paw, they prepared to enter the building.
"Nick!" Judy whispered. "Who was your informant? You're hanging your tail out on this one!"
"I got the tip from Weaselton," the fox answered before he pounded on the door. "Police!" Nick yelled. "Open up, we have a warrant to search this place!"
"Weaselton?" Judy groaned. "Sweet Mother of Thyme, not him!"
An elderly porcupine slowly opened the door and peered outside. "I ain't got nothing illegal in here," he called out. "Nothin at all."
"We'll be the judge of that," Nick softly growled out as he shoved the warrant towards the owner while he pushed the door open. There was a thumping sound as something inside fell over and all four officers stared in surprise at the white object which slowly rolled out of the door.
Pushing the door even further open, they gaped at the cases and cases that were piled up inside. "Wait, is that all toilet paper?" Nick muttered. "You've been hoarding the TP? That's why we're having a shortage?"
"That's all I've got in here!" the owner chuckled. "I have cornered the market on toilet paper and now I'm going to charge four times the amount I paid for it! Supply and demand fox, I'll be rich!"
Fangmeyer leaned over and snatched the white roll from the ground and with a grin handed it to Nick. "Here Wilde, you might need this!" she chuckled as she towered over the fox. "You're going to be in deep doo-doo when you get back to the station and tell Bogo what we found."
"Who says doo-doo anymore?" Nick sadly sighed. His ears were drooping as he stared at the roll of toilet paper. "The word is crap."
"If you want that roll it'll be five bucks!" the old porcupine gleefully snorted out as he stuck out his paw. "But seeing that you're a police officer, I'll give you a discount and so that'll only be four and a quarter."
Nick fished into his wallet and pulled out the cash, handing it to the owner.
"That price was outrageous!" Judy snapped at him as he watched the fox tuck his newly acquired purchase under his arm. "Why did you do that?"
"I've almost run out of toilet paper at home and this is the first chance I've had to buy some since this whole outbreak started," Nick replied as he trudged back towards their patrol car.
The tiger was right and the fox was indeed in deep doo-doo with the bull when they got back!